Title: Sad Memories
Summary: Teddy has a nightmare, and Harry has one too.
Pairing/Characters:Harry and Teddy
Rating:K
Warnings: N/A
Notes: Written for Herbology Assignment: Instead of writing for a specific task this time, conjure something beautiful using words which creates a whirl of emotions in the reader's mind. (I tried my best)
The soft fabric crinkled under tense fingers. Dark hair splashed out, tossing with the movement of the person in the bed. Trembling limbs flinched under a cool breeze, lashing out at random intervals. Eyes pressed together like clam lips, frantic movement underneath the delicate skin of the eyelash. The spot beside the man was unusually empty, the usual occupant away for the weekend.
Inside the mind of the dark-haired man lying in a restless sleep, scenes played out. Memories the man only wished to forget flickered in front of him like a movie over and over and over and over.
"Kill the spare."
A flash of light, a mother's scream.
Fred Weasley's still silent body, his family surrounding him. Tears falling and falling. George's scream.
"I must not tell lies"
"Here lies Dobby, a free elf."
Green filling his vision.
Tears leaked out of closed eyes, soaking the pillow below. Dreams turned to memories and memories turned to nightmares. There was no one to wake him tonight. No one.
"No," Harry mumbled, flipping to his stomach. "Please, no."
Tight claws clamped around his head, cackling at his pain, his agony. White noise surrounded him; voices of the dead blaming him.
"You should have killed him faster."
"Why did you make me take the cup?"
"It's your fault the marauders are gone."
"Remus," he murmured, hands gripping onto his forearms, digging the nails into the soft flesh, drawing drops of red. "Sirius."
He didn't wake when the door of his room was pushed open and a beam of light fell over his eyes. He flinched away from the light, waving his hand in the movement for the shield charm. His eyes crinkled, and his lips pulled down. The tears fell faster.
The soft pitter patter of small feet approached the bed, small amber eyes stared with wonder at the tracks of tears, similar ones marring the chubby cheeks. A large grey wolf clutched to the child's chest, fingers wrapped around the soft fur almost hesitant to let go to wake the man in the bed.
The uncertain light and the shadows that covered the room convinced the child, and he placed a hand on the sweaty shoulder of the distressed man. The man jerked under the touch, flinching away, but his eyes opened. Somewhere in his mind, he recognised the touch of his godson.
"Teddy?" he whispered, rubbing a hand over his stained cheeks. "What's wrong?"
Teddy shifted under the scrutiny. Usually, he would tell his godfather that the darkness scared him and made his dreams scary, but tonight Harry looked like he did after a bad dream. The tears that still dripped out of his Godfather's eyes only worried him.
"Are you okay? Did you have a b-bad dream?" Teddy's five-year-old innocence was reflected in his voice, but Harry also heard the fear. He cursed, wishing his godson hadn't seen him in this state, but knowing there was nothing to do about it, Harry reached over and grabbed his wand.
"Lumos."
A white light filled the room, and Harry flinched at the brightness. He glanced around and shivered in the still uncertain light. He noticed Teddy standing by his bed with one sock on his foot, a dark black with green spots, shivering.
"Come here, Ted."
Teddy climbed on the bed, setting himself into Harry's crossed legs, wrapping his arms around his Godfather's neck. He ignored the sweaty skin and damp clothes, only inhaling the smell of safely and love.
"Did you have a bad dream?" Harry asked after Teddy's shaking started to still. Harry ran a hand up and down Teddy's back in an attempt to calm not only Teddy but himself as well.
Teddy nodded, snuggling closer to Harry. "Grandma," he whispered. "I saw her asleep and cold again."
Harry nodded, tightening his arms around his godson. He remembered the day Andromeda passed on. His godson's blotchy face and Andromeda's paper like skin. Cancer, they told him later. Harry couldn't care less about what killed her if he was brutally honest. He cared more about the fact that his five-year-old godson was the one to find her dead in her bed with blood leaking out of her mouth. It happened months ago, but he was still having horrific nightmares.
"Did you have a bad dream too, Harry?"
Feeling his blood run cold and his heart stop, Harry leaned back so he could look at his godson. Teddy seemed a lot calmer than before, and he was wearing an expression that Harry remembered on his face when Victorie fell over and scraped up her knees.
Teddy brought a hand up to Harry's face and stroked the dried tears that still stained his skin. His soft finger's brushing against Harry's skin, had tears reappearing in his eyes.
"In a way," Harry said, not wanting to concern his godson too much with his problems, but unwilling to lie to him. "See, I was remembering, but sometimes my memories are sad and I cry."
"Like with Grandma?" Teddy asked, his hand against Harry's cheek starting to shake.
Harry brought his own much larger and rougher hand up to cover Teddy's. The lumos light illuminated the pale words carved into his skin, and Harry took a brief moment to close his eyes and breathe.
"Like with Grandma," Harry whispered after a moment. "Right now all you can remember are the sad memories, but one day you'll remember the good ones as well."
"Like when she pushed me on the swings?" Teddy tilted his head to look at Harry, still not removing his hand. He was no longer shaking, and there was almost a smile on his lips.
"Yeah, like that," Harry said with his own soft smile.
Teddy nodded, then his eyebrows creased together and he stared at his hand on Harry's cheek still being covered by the larger hand. Harry noticed the frown and pulled both his and Teddy's hand down to their lap, rubbing a soothing circle into the back of Teddy's hand.
"What is it?" Harry asked when Teddy's eyes just followed the hand down.
"When will you remember the good memories?"
Harry felt a rock sink deep into his stomach. He saw flashes of green, of red, of yellow. He saw the pale skin and still limps. He saw the gravestones and mounts of dirt. He could smell the musky sweat and metallic blood. He could feel the grime under his nails, and he could hear the screams.
"I remember the good ones," Harry assured, focusing back on his godson and forcing the tears back. "But I haven't forgotten the sad ones either." Harry took a deep breath and let go of his tears. Teddy needed to understand that his godfather wasn't in control all the time, even if it pained Harry to expose Teddy to the weaker side of himself. "It's okay to cry when remembering the sad memories."
Blinking, Teddy nodded and then snuggled close to Harry. Harry lay them down on the pale sheets and pulled Teddy on top of him, so his head was resting right over Harry's heart. It might be cheesy, but Harry knew that Teddy needed to hear the life that still ran through him. He needed reassurance, and Harry would give him that.
When tears dampened his pyjama shirt, Harry didn't comment. He only buried his wet face into Teddy's hair.
(w.c 1,231)
WolfWinks-xx-
