Kirkwall – Alienage
Fenris bolted upright. He tried to open his eyes, but was still seeing the nightmare play out in his mind. After reliving his introduction to Danarius's first apprentice, Fenris had struck down his former master – only to have it be Kaiden. The last thing he had seen before waking was Kaiden mortally wounded, bleeding out in front of him. He shuddered and rubbed his hands over his face. It had been just another nightmare, nothing… He wasn't at home. All at once it came back to him – going into the Fade, the demons, Kaiden… Fenris looked about frantically and then saw that Kaiden was sleeping on a mat beside him. His breathing was steady, peaceful even.
Kaiden was alive – well of course he was alive. A death in the Fade would not kill him, only make him tranquil. As much as Fenris wished that Kaiden were free of the curse of magic, he hated more the thought of him robbed of emotions, of never again seeing those blue eyes sparkle in amusement, never again hearing his laughter, never again feeling his pulse quicken at his touch. No, Fenris would not let Kaiden be tranquil, not ever, and certainly not because of him. Someone had to know a cure, perhaps in Tevinter. He would do whatever it took, even…
"Fenris?"
Fenris flinched at hearing Merrill's voice and realized his hand was in Kaiden's hair. It might not yet be too late. He withdrew his hand and turned to the elven mage. "Help him!"
Merrill jumped and hurried over to Kaiden. Magic glowed about her hands as she knelt beside him. "What's wrong? He-"
"He's dying! In the Fade…"
"I can't, Fenris! He has to be healed in the Fade. I-"
Fenris was instantly at the side of the sleeping abomination. "Heal him! I know you can hear me, demon… Justice!" He grabbed Anders' shoulders. "If he wakes up tranquil I swear you won't have a host to wake up in."
Some magical force pulled him back, like a leash. The Keeper stood in the doorway, frowning at him. "Such hysterics will not help, young man. Since your friend has not awoken, I would say that the danger has passed. Now, let them concentrate on staying alive and helping Feynriel."
Merrill had walked around to him. She touched his arm, causing his lyrium to flare at the unique feel of her magic. "Fenris, I-"
He shoved her hand away and snarled. "I don't need you comforting me." For a moment he stood there. Some force more inexorable than magic was pulling him to Kaiden and he ached to return to his side.
Arianni now stood beside the Keeper and Fenris felt the weight of three pairs of Dalish eyes upon him. It was too much. Casting a final glance toward Kaiden, he strode past the elven women and outside into the bracing cold. He shivered. Torn between a desire to return to his mansion or to go to Kaiden, he ended up just standing there in the snow, waiting.
There was too much blood. Magic wouldn't… no, it had to. Varric pulled the cap off of the healing potion with his teeth and poured it over the gaping wound through Kaiden's chest. "Hang in there, Hawke. You'll get through this. Have you heard the stories I've been telling? It would be a sin for you to be taken out by anything less than a dragon."
That earned him a small smile. Then the fool tried to speak again. Varric was only able to discern the word 'tranquil.'
Varric uncorked their last healing potion and helped Kaiden drink it down. "Tranquil? Well, women also like the strong stoic type, especially if they look like you. The real tragedy is that you might actually beat me in Wicked Grace."
Kaiden's eyes slid shut and there was only the smallest twitch of a smile. Varric looked up to see Anders – Justice – dispatch another elf-that-was-really-a-demon-thing. "Blondie, get over here!"
The bleeding had slowed and Varric couldn't tell whether Kaiden was still breathing. "Hawke? Come on, stay with me, Kaiden."
Justice knelt on Kaiden's other side. "The Fade is not bound by the same laws as your world." As Justice stretched his hands over the wound, they began to glow blue with magic. The wound began to close before Varric's eyes. Never had he seen a healer, not even Anders, repair so much damage so quickly. But it was taking a toll on Justice, or Anders, Varric wasn't sure how that worked. Beads of sweat appeared on his furrowed brow and his arms began to tremble. Still he kept the magic flowing.
A feeling like springtime came over Varric, the sweet scent of lilacs with a rich undertone of earth, warm sunlight and a cool breeze. Luminous butterflies fluttered about him and then appeared to dissolve into Justice. They seemed to revive the spirit as the strain left his face and the glow of magic intensified. Kaiden's chest and shoulder were now fully mended, yet still he did not breathe.
"Take heart, ser dwarf. Your friend's spirit is strong." Surprised at hearing a mellifluous feminine voice, Varric looked up to see a young woman seated at Kaiden's head. He was certain that she had been the statue in the courtyard, only now, alive with the glow of magic, she was breathtaking. Part of Varric thought that he should be alarmed at her sudden presence, but instead he felt an overwhelming sense of peace.
The woman leaned forward and gently kissed Kaiden's lips. He inhaled then and Varric released a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Kaiden blinked and looked around. "Fenris? Where's Fenris?" Sitting up, he clasped his head with a groan.
The woman replied. "The elf is safe. He was only dispelled from the Fade."
Kaiden turned to the woman. "Who are you?"
Justice spoke at last. "She is a spirit of love. Not all denizens of the Fade are demons. There is beauty here as well."
Varric stood and helped Kaiden to his feet. "She helped bring you back."
"Indeed?" Kaiden looked at the woman again. "It appears I am in your debt."
The woman arched a brow. "A mage does not say that lightly to a spirit of the Fade. Be assured that it was enough to get a glimpse of what you mortals feel."
"Can you help us find Feynriel?"
She nodded. "Across the courtyard. There he is being tempted by a cheap reflection of what I am." Her eyes flashed. "The boy is strong, but he tires, and Caress is a cunning demon." She turned to Justice then and placed a hand on his chest. "I feel your struggle. Do not let hatred destroy that which was created out of love." She appeared to dissolve into the light and was gone. Varric felt an unexpected ache at her disappearance.
The three of them were quiet as they walked back down the long corridor to the courtyard. Varric got Justice's attention. "If this demon starts talking to me and I'm not telling it where to go or shooting it between the eyes…"
Justice nodded. "I shall expel you from the Fade."
"I was thinking more along the lines of blasting the shit out of the demon, but I guess that works too."
Caress watched the young dreamer run away and sighed. As the boy was already awakening to his powers, there was no longer much hope of possessing him. She had not been foolishly arrogant of success as had been Wryme. Then, true to his nature, the pride demon had decided that if he could not have his prize, she would not have hers. Wryme had nearly destroyed the man.
She turned to the mage who had helped the dreamer find his way. Kaiden Hawke was a singular man, one any clever demon would see was too virtuous to have hope of turning. But Caress was an exceptionally clever demon. Given time, even virtue could be made a vice.
She drifted over to the man, so beautiful and potentially powerful, he would have been an utter waste as a tranquil. "What is it you desire, I wonder?"
"Only your death, demon."
She felt the man trying to call his magic. "Now, now, that is not how it works, you know. I get to make you an offer and only then do you righteously turn me down."
"Let's skip the-"
"Do you love him still?"
"What?" The man had clearly not expected that.
"The elf, who just now tried to kill you, do you-"
"That was the demon's doing."
Caress laughed. "Oh you beautiful stupid boy! There really is nothing I could offer you today!"
"You… good. Then-"
"My offer is for the future."
"Spare me."
"Your elf is going to die."
That got the man's attention. A flare of his magic overpowered hers and covered the room in frost. "Torment me, if you must, but you will not threaten him."
"I do not threaten the elf, dear boy. My offer to you is his life." The man stared at her now, and she could see that he was starting to believe the vision she showed him. "When the time comes, you will know-"
"No. NO! It's a lie! Get out of my head, bitch!" He flung a fireball at her and Caress winked herself to another part of the Fade. She had laid the groundwork. Such a delicious prize was worth waiting for.
The demon had vanished but the vision was still there, so sharp it cut through all other thoughts and Kaiden was seeing himself holding Fenris as he bled… No! It was an illusion, nothing more. It was no more real than the vision that the sloth demon had given him, of his family alive and together, and him holding Fenris, waking up with the elf in his arms…
"Hawke?"
Kaiden turned to see Varric and Justice enter the room. "The demon's gone. Feynriel got away."
Justice's luminous blue eyes narrowed. "It did not try to bargain with you?"
Varric frowned at Justice. "Did you miss the part where it's a demon? What else do they do? Hawke knows better than to listen to that shit."
"It tried but… I did not let it finish."
Justice nodded. "It is wise not to listen. Come, Feynriel's mind is free, for now, but he is in turmoil."
Kaiden started to follow Justice when Varric stopped him. "You alright?"
"I'm fine." Kaiden sighed when Varric made a face. "The demons… ah, I'll feel better once we're out of this place."
"Can't argue there. This mage dreamland of yours has its moments, but I'm surprised any of you are sane. Come to think of it…"
Kaiden shook his head. "It's not usually like this." Then he turned to Varric, a glint in his eye. "And I seem to remember a dwarf telling me about a dream he had where the arishok-"
Varric held up his hands. "Alright, point taken. How drunk was I that I told you that?"
"I think that was the night Isabela got you to try her 'special.'"
"Ah, Rivaini. Lesson. Learned."
Kaiden followed Varric and Justice down a hall and back into the courtyard. He saw Feynriel kneeling in the middle of it, his hands clutched over his ears. "Feynriel?" When the boy did not answer, Kaiden took the stairs two at a time and crossed the courtyard to him. He crouched before him and placed a hand on his arm. "You're safe now, Feynriel."
Feynriel's head shot up and he knocked Kaiden's hand away. "So a sloth demon now, is it? I will not let down my guard! No… you are not an illusion… there are no seams… Is it really you, Kaiden?"
"Yes, Feynriel, I'm really here. This nightmare can end."
"Can it? Maybe for now but... Every time I sleep they test me... my every want, my every weakness... Tranquility may be the only way-"
Kaiden grabbed Feynriel's shoulders. "No! Listen to me. I will not… You can master this."
"I'm tired, Kaiden."
"I know, I know. Those demons were powerful. Most mages will not face such in all their lives, but you saw through their illusions."
"You think I can face them every night?"
"I think that when you master your power, you won't have to." Feynriel just stared at him, so Kaiden continued. "Keeper Marathari told me about your power. You can shape the Fade. This is your realm as much as theirs."
"But Keeper Marathari cannot help me and the Circle…"
"Not the Circle. Tevinter. They have experience with this magic."
"Tevinter… You... really think I can do it?"
"I know you can. You have come so far on your own already. There must be mages in Tevinter who can guide you, although there are those that would seek to use you as surely as any demon."
Feynriel smiled. "I think I have some experience with that. Yes, I will go to Tevinter. If anyone can help me with this magic, it would be there. Thank you, Kaiden. This is the second time I owe you my life."
"It was you who saw through the illusions."
As Feynriel looked around them at the courtyard, it began to feel insubstantial and Kaiden felt a twinge of vertigo. Feyrniel smiled. "The Fade feels different somehow. I can see the stitches, the seams holding it together. I feel as though I could wake at any moment." He waved his hand and a doorway of light appeared before him. He turned back to Kaiden then. "Will you… tell my mother where I've gone? She will not understand."
Kaiden nodded. "May the Maker guide your path."
"Thank you, Kaiden, for everything. Farewell." He stepped into the light and then was gone. Kaiden turned to Justice and Varric and then everything blurred and he was no longer in the courtyard.
Kaiden opened his eyes to find himself lying on a mat in Feynriel's old bedroom. First Merrill was there and then Anders, concerned for him. Was he hurt? Was he tranquil? Then the Keeper and Arianni wanted to hear about Feynriel. Yes, of course, that's why he'd gone into the Fade. He shouldn't begrudge telling them and he did his best to focus on what he was saying, what they were saying, them thanking him again. It all took forever. He needed to find Fenris.
At last he was free. Anders seemed to have sensed his anxiety and took over comforting Arianni on her son's departure for the faraway Tevinter Imperium. Kaiden opened the door and looked up and down the narrow street, now dimly lit by the predawn. Merrill had said that Fenris was waiting outside. Kaiden saw a trough in the snow and could imagine the elf creating it with his pacing. But he was not there now. A fresh set of footprints led away from Arianni's apartment back the way they had come the night before. Kaiden pulled his robe closer around himself, feeling for the first time the chill of winter.
