I know, I know... I left quite a cliff-hanger in Chapter 6, I'm sorry :( Hopefully this chapter makes up for it! :)


7. TRUTH

I awoke the next morning in a daze, groaning as the grey morning light stung my eyes. I could tell they were still swollen from all my crying the previous day and a dull ache had settled in my head. In an attempt to stretch the aches from my joints I accidentally pulled at the open wound in my chest, temporarily cutting off my breath and making me clutch at my shirt in agony. A fresh bath of tears pushed against the backs of my eyes as the memories of what I had done yesterday came back all at once; my rejection of Edward, and the reminder that I would probably never see him again. I paused and took a deep breath, reminding myself that I had been through this before. This was just the first morning in a series of mornings, and the first would always hurt the most. While the pain subsided, I reflected back on my time spent in Forks and where I had ended up. Soon I grew angry and frustrated with myself. I was in such pain because I had lost my focus and I had allowed myself to become nearly obsessed with Edward. It had not only destroyed me once, but twice. I decided then that I didn't want to do this anymore. I didn't want to make someone else so important in my life, make them the entire reason for my existence, that I end up losing myself again. I had to believe that I deserved better than that.

I forced myself to get out of bed, but when I swung my legs from underneath the blankets, my foot brushed against something heavy that sat on the floor. My eyes slowly focused in front of me, and I found all the packed boxes that I had left in Edward's car. He must have dropped them off last night while I slept. Their presence was like pouring acid on the wound and I knew I didn't have the strength to deal with them now. I dressed quickly, in a hurry to get out the door as the agony threatened to pull me under again. Every time it settled, I knew I only had a few minutes before another thought or memory would creep across my vision, causing me to gasp for air again.

While the pain was tolerable, I remembered a task I had been putting off for too long. With a little apprehension, I opened a couple boxes until I found what I was searching for. I lifted my ancient computer from the box and set it on my desk, plugging it in and switching on the power. As the machine started up with a grunt, I brushed the dust off the monitor wondering when the last time was I even used it. After what seemed like an eternity waiting for the desktop to appear, I clicked on my e-mail account and groaned as hundreds of documents from Renee glared at me with their bold headlines. I bypassed their messages that probably meant nothing by now and opened up a blank e-mail. I pulled up my chair and sat down with a sigh, wondering where I should even begin.

Hi Mom. I'm sorry I haven't been in touch for a while, everything's been so crazy here…

I paused, staring at the screen. I deleted the second sentence and started over.

I miss you. You have no idea how much I've needed to talk to you…

I glared at the keyboard in frustration. I highlighted the entire text and deleted it. I forced my fingers to type, refusing to look up at the screen to read what I was writing.

Mom, I broke up with Edward.

I hit the "Send" button before I had a second to question it. I switched off the computer and pushed myself up from the chair, wanting desperately to get out of the house. I grabbed the nearest sweatshirt that sat on top of one of the boxes, and as I picked it up, something fell to the floor that had been underneath it. My heart froze as I picked the photograph off the floor. It was the one of Edward and I that was taken when I cared about little else except being with him, his perfect beauty still mesmerizing me. Without hesitation, I tossed it in the trashcan next to my desk, unable to handle such a reminder in my current state.

Out of habit, I reached for the bureau behind me and pulled open the small jewelry drawer. I paused when I realized only Jacob's engagement ring lay in the wood box. Ignoring the dull throbbing in my chest, I slipped the ring back on my finger and surprise hit me when I realized how natural the ring felt on my skin. The delicate band fit me perfectly and I couldn't feel its weight at all. It was like I had been wearing it for years. I crossed my room, suddenly feeling like some of the weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Just as I was about to walk out the door, the shrill house phone rang in the kitchen. Not wanting it to wake Charlie, I hurried down the stairs and yanked the phone off the wall in the middle of its third ring.

"Hello!?" My voice came out almost frantic.

"Bella!?" Renee gasped. "Oh, thank God! What is going on, what happened!?" She sounded as out of breath as I was.

"Hi Mom," I sighed, leaning against the kitchen counter, relief flooding over me that I had someone to talk to. "I'm sorry if you were worried."

"Well it would help if you would answer at least one of my emails, young lady," Renee scolded me.

"I know," I apologized. "Things have been… difficult recently."

"So I've heard," Renee's tone softened. "Sweetie, what happened between you and Edward?"

I paused. "You got my e-mail already?"

"Well, I've been practically sitting at my computer all day and night waiting to hear from you!" Renee exclaimed. "I was just writing you another threatening message about how if I didn't hear from you soon, I was going to file a missing person's report! And that's when I got your reply."

I sighed heavily.

"Do you want to talk about it, honey?"

I attempted to swallow the lump that was beginning to gather in my throat. "I don't really know what to say, Mom. Things just got… complicated." I closed my eyes and the memory of Edward's hurt expression flashed in my mind, cutting off my ability to speak momentarily.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," Renee's comforting tone cut into my thoughts. "Are you alright?"

I attempted to quietly sniff back tears, but I knew she heard me. "I'm doing the best I can."

"I'm sure it hurts now Bella, and I know how much you meant to Edward. I noticed that when I first saw the two of you together."

I couldn't stop the tears that now flowed freely down my cheeks. I held the phone away from my face so that my mother wouldn't hear my gentle sobs.

"But I'm proud of you for being honest with him, honey," Renee continued. "Just take everything a day at a time. If you made the right choice, you'll know soon enough."

I shifted the phone back to my lips. "But I can't even begin to imagine how much I hurt him," I sobbed.

"I'm sure he's upset," Renee agreed. "But Bella, at least you told him now. Try to imagine how much you both would have suffered had you gone through with the wedding, feeling the way you did."

"I know, Mom," I wiped the tears from my eyes with the sleeve of my sweatshirt. "You're right."

"Trust me," Renee's voice got quiet. "It's not a comfortable position to be in, and I would not have wanted you to go through that. I know it's difficult, but it sounds like you made the right choice."

I winced at the thought of Renee having to leave Charlie, no doubt having the same apprehensions I had. Although they had already invested in a house and a child together.

"Sweetie, do you want me to come up for a visit?"

"No Mom," I ran a hand through my hair. "It's alright, you don't have to."

"It's no problem, Bella," Renee insisted. "I'll take some time off work and Phil will understand. If you need me in Forks just say the words, you know I'll be on the next plane."

"I appreciate it Mom," I assured her. "But I'll be alright, I have Charlie here. I mean, I miss you and I would love to see you, but you don't have to trouble yourself. I have people here who will take care of me."

Renee paused. "You mean Jacob, right Bella?" I could hear the smile in her voice.

I was surprised to find a grin tugging on the corners of my mouth and a warmth spread through my chest at the sound of his name. "Well, I-"

"Bella, be careful," Renee cautioned. "Don't let Jacob become your latest addiction when you haven't completely taken care of other business yet. You know how much you mean to him."

"I know," I paused for a moment. "Wait, how do you know this Mom?"

"I don't miss much," I heard her sigh. "I remember you two growing up together, and I knew back then that you held a special place in Jacob's heart. I'm sure his affection has only grown over the years."

I smiled warmly, the tears drying on my face.

"Also I speak to Charlie every once in a while," Renee admitted. "He's mentioned to me the relationship between the two of you a couple times."

"Great," I mumbled, slightly embarrassed. I wasn't used to both parents having detailed discussions about my life.

"Bella, Charlie and I have always liked Jacob," Renee continued. "But you need to take care of you first. I know he's your best friend, but don't feel like you need to be everything to everybody right now. I'm sure your decision to leave Edward has made Jacob very happy, am I right?"

I traced a grout line on the tile floor with my sneaker. "I actually haven't told Jacob yet," I admitted.

"Oh, well. That's probably a good idea," Renee stated. "All I'm saying Bella, is do what you need to do to be happy first. You can take care of everyone else later."

"I know, Mom. I understand what you're saying, it means a lot." For a moment I remembered back to the conversation I had with Rosalie. She was right, I desperately needed my mother's advice and approval. Now that I had it, I discovered I was able to breathe a little easier.

"Last chance," Renee's voice cut into my thoughts again. "Do I need to buy a plane ticket to Washington?"

I smiled. "No, Mom. I think I'm alright now. Thanks for the phone call, I didn't realize how much I needed it."

"Anytime, sweetie. You know you can call me whenever you need me, I'm more than happy to hear from you. Or you can always e-mail me," she paused. "Just make sure it's every couple weeks or so, you're going to give your poor mother a heart attack."

I laughed. "Alright, I can deal with that."

"Fair enough," Renee established. "I'll let you go. Take care of yourself, Bella. And please call me if you need anything."

"I will, thanks Mom." I suddenly felt anxious to leave the house. "I love you."

"Love you too, sweetie. Goodbye."

I hung up the phone, still hearing my mother's words in my head. Feeling like I was getting a little closer to the person I used to be, I grabbed my truck keys and let myself out of the house, locking the door behind me. I had to get to the one place I would feel whole again. I had to get to Jacob.

***

I wiped the tears that continued to blur my field of vision and struggled to keep the truck on the road as I drove to La Push. I took advantage of the fact I was alone for the moment and let go of the sobs that had built in my chest. I placed my hand over my heaving ribcage and struggled to compose myself before I reached Jacob's. I knew that Jacob wouldn't believe the real reason I had come over, and I figured that showing up crying wasn't the best idea. The trees along the side of the road began to thin out, and fragile grey sunlight began to filter easier through the branches as I drew closer to La Push. My breathing slowly began to return to normal, and the last few tears slide down my cheek. I was grateful for the calm that eventually settled over me. I knew it wouldn't last long, but for that moment I could breathe.

I blinked as something crossed the road in front of me and I screamed as I slammed on the break pedal, closing my eyes to avoid witnessing the crash. There was no way I was going to stop in time. The breaks locked up and I skidded on the slick road and instinctively I yanked the emergency brake, waiting for the impact. My truck groaned as the wheel shook violently in my hand, and I came to a stop sideways in the middle of the road, inches from the form who stood in front of the right headlight. I opened my eyes in disbelief that I had managed to avoid the inevitable accident. I caught my breath and shoved the driver's side door open, jumping out onto the pavement. I slammed the door shut and glared at Edward.

"What the hell are you doing, have you completely lost your mind!?" I snapped at him.

Edward walked slowly away from me into the middle of the road. His jet black eyes glared at me, all emotion drained from his features. "Where are you going, Bella?"

"Seriously, Edward!? Are you following me!?" I continued to yell, too annoyed and startled to continue my grieving.

"No, I haven't been following you," he took a few steps sideways, slowly circling me. "I'm just out hunting."

"Oh," I felt my anger slowly dissolve as I watched him glare at me. The reminder of what I'd put him through just yesterday released the rest of my tension and I remained where I stood, feeling the exhaustion hit me again. I allowed myself to gaze into Edward's lifeless eyes for a moment, the pain in my chest temporarily relieved by his presence. Edward stopped pacing in front of me and we remained standing in front of each other. He also seemed to relax as each of us stared at the other, neither of us breaking the silence. We kept a safe distance between us, neither really knowing what to say.

Edward forced an awkward smile. "Also Bella, you know your truck isn't easy to hide."

I glanced over my shoulder at my truck, idling noisily behind me. The air of discomfort seemed to lift a little as I fixed my gaze back on him. As I beheld Edward again, a new unsettling feeling began to come over me. Like previous situations I had managed to get myself into, I was alone. Isolated. However this time, I wasn't sure what side I was on, and I wasn't sure that I had anyone to come to my rescue.

Edward stood in front of me. Poised. Silent. Lethal. Only a few days ago I never would have imagined being afraid of him. But now, knowing that I had taken away the last thing that made him human, a new trigger of fear shot through me. I was aware of what he was capable of, and I possessed more knowledge about his family that I should. I was a mortal, and I knew too much.

He must have sensed my body tense up because his smile slowly dissolved and he automatically took a defensive stance. A slight breeze blew through the trees and Edward tilted his chin towards it, no doubt catching my scent. I remembered how difficult it was for him to resist me when we were in love, and now I felt my heart beat out of my chest as I grasped that he may not show the same restraint now. He no longer had a reason to. He fixed his gaze back on my face, unable to hide the hunger that boiled in his ebony eyes.

Panic slowly rose to my throat as I hopelessly glanced around us. Deep down I told myself Edward would never hurt me. Even though I had just broken his heart, I couldn't bear the thought that he would ever do me any harm. But as my surroundings came into view and I recognized where I was, an icy chill ran down my back.

"Edward," my voice trembled. "You're past the treaty line." I shifted my eyes and caught Edward's crooked smile, however it no longer held the same pleasure it used to. Now, as he sneered at me on the desolate road I felt the unfamiliar sense of terror. Like a deer frozen in front of a predator. I watched him look at me with pity.

"What's it to you, Bella?" He took a step closer to me.

"You know what this means, Edward." My eyes followed his every movement. "Don't do this."

He glared at me. "What's stopping me now? You're heading over there to see him now anyway, aren't you?"

I could no longer speak, no longer breathe. Edward knew I meant nothing to him anymore, I had chosen someone else over him after I had promised to love him forever. I was now just another pitiful human in his eyes, the same human he had thirsted over when I first came to Forks, but he never took the opportunity to follow his instincts. Now years later, as I stood frozen in front of him, there was little holding him back from destroying me. I could only pray that he would make it quick and painless.

Edward suddenly broke his intense stare and looked at the road behind me. I watched another smirk pull across his face as he stole one last glance at me, then he turned and ran across the road and into the forest, disappearing in an instant. My breath escaped in a gasp and I realized I was trembling.

The car horn sounding behind me nearly made me jump out of my skin. I whirled around and caught the stare of a confused driver who had come to a stop behind my truck.

"You alright, sweetie?" The woman sat leaning out of the driver's side window.

The look on my face must have caused her more concern, but I waved and began to make my way back to my truck. "Sorry, thought I hit a deer."

I quickly opened the driver's side door and climbed back into the cab, unable to shake the chill I still felt. I hadn't been afraid of Edward in a long time, and the feeling had left me unsettled. I pushed the accelerator down too quickly and spun the tires, suddenly needing to be somewhere familiar and safe.

***

Soon I had turned down the familiar path that led to Jacob's and settled into the tire tracks that were now beginning to cut a smoother path through the rough terrain. Even though my chest still ached and I had nearly shaken the unfamiliar fear of Edward's presence, I couldn't help the warmth that began to build in my heart as I crawled closer and closer to Jacob. He had always been my sun, the light in my darkness, and now I knew I needed him more than ever. I pushed the needle into the red zone, ignoring the awful sounds coming from the engine as I finally broke through the thick forest and stopped at the edge of the clearing. I shut off the engine and listened to my heavy breathing in the stillness, feeling all the weight of the past few days on my shoulders.

I stared through the windshield at Jacob, who had been standing in the middle of the clearing as I drove up, facing away from me. The muscles in his arms and shoulders were tense and I could tell by his clenched fists that he was angry. His stance didn't change as he slowly looked over one shoulder and I caught his piercing gaze. The joy I had felt on my approach to the house became short-lived as I realized how much I had hurt Jacob. My reluctance at this decision had been torturous for me, but I had never though about how agonizing it must have been for him to await my answer. I could now see it in his eyes. Being unable to witness his pain any longer, I pushed the truck door open and jumped out, coming to stand a few feet away from him. Jacob slowly turned to face me, a look of anguish and exhaustion on his face that made my heart ache. I couldn't make sense of all the thoughts slamming around in my brain, and I didn't know what to tell him first. I also worried if he would even believe me, especially given the way he was glaring at me. The two of us continued to stare at each other in silence, me not knowing where to start, Jacob refusing to give me any indication as to what he wanted from me. Although he probably felt as if he'd said enough and now it was my turn. He was right.

I smiled tentatively. "Hey Jake," I began.

"Bella."

His lifeless voice took me back a second, and I began to wonder if I even had a chance anymore. That thought terrified me and I pushed it into the recesses of my mind. Suddenly I became unsure of myself, unsure of what to say to make him stop glaring at me the way he was. I drew in an unsteady breath. "How are you?"

He seemed to sneer at me. "How do you think I've been?"

I fixed my gaze on the ground, unable to continue watching him stare at me with such resentment. I knew I deserved it and it was nothing compared to what I had put him through, but it hurt nonetheless. "I'm sorry," I whispered, but I wasn't sure if he heard me.

I heard Jacob sigh. "What do you want, Bella?"

The way he phrased his question no longer seemed to allow me the option, and when I returned my gaze to his face I was met with a look of irritation. My knees trembled, and I knew my voice would surely do the same.

"Jake, I am so sorry…"

"Don't worry about it Bells," Jacob took a few steps away from me. "It's nothing I haven't already dealt with before."

I knew he couldn't comprehend what I was saying, and even though my heart threatened to beat out of my chest in his presence, the weight of today held me back from the embrace I desperately wanted to give him. I knew that before I could offer him everything he ever wanted, first I needed to make amends.

"Jake," I began again, forcing myself to find the words. "I've put you through hell, and I don't deserve you."

"So, that's your excuse?" Jacob growled. "Don't insult me, Bella. I wouldn't have proposed to you if I thought I was wasting my time."

"I just need to apologize," my heart ached as I watched my best friend, my true love, glare at me in utter disgust.

"Don't bother," Jacob crossed his arms over his broad chest. "Don't make it any worse than it already is, just go back to him."

The scar throbbed when Jacob mentioned Edward, and suddenly my throat tightened as I thought of Edward's lifeless eyes staring into mine as he stood in front of me on the road, his crooked grin as he disappeared into the forest. That was probably the last time I would ever see him. The grief hit me so fast that my eyes welled up with tears, choking off the words I frantically had to say.

Jacob took my trembling lip the wrong way and rolled his eyes, slowly backing up even further. "I'm not about to comfort you again, Bella." I watched the pain flicker in his eyes as he forced himself to walk away from me. "You've made your choice, and I'm done waiting."

"Jake, please-"

Jacob turned his back to me and I watched him take heavy steps towards the house. His shoulders were slumped and his fists clutched in anger. Through my tear-filled eyes, I thought I saw his strong body tremble.

"Jake!" I forced out of my tight throat, my legs refusing to carry me after him. He continued in the same direction with long strides, and I realized I needed to tell him everything to make him stop. "I didn't choose Edward!"

My knees threatened to buckle as I watched Jacob come to a halt in the middle of the front yard. He hesitantly glanced over his shoulder at me and I could see the disbelief in his eyes.

With tears spilling down my cheeks, I let a smile pull across my face as I shrugged. "I didn't choose him."

Jacob turned back to my direction and I watched his entire body freeze as he caught sight of my left hand. I looked down, for a moment forgetting what I was wearing. I slowly brought up my left hand and held it in front of my face, staring at Jacob's engagement ring on my finger. Smiling back at Jacob I slowly shook my head, feeling the tears spill down my cheeks.

"I didn't choose him."

Jacob closed the distance between us as fast as his human form could carry him and pulled my trembling form into his arms, kissing me feverishly. He placed both his hands on the small of my back, holding me against him as we both cried tears of joy. I was grateful that he was holding me up and whatever unhappy feelings I still held from saying goodbye to Edward melted away as Jacob placed one of my hands over his heart.

"Thank you," he whispered into my hair as he kissed the top of my head. His heart pounded against my hand as he held it there with his unbelievable strength. He took a couple deep sighs of contentment, as if my touch was all that was able to make him breathe again. "Thank you," he continued to whisper above me, almost to himself since his eyes were shut tight. "Thank you, thank you, thank you…"

I reached up and put my left hand on his cheek, gently wiping away a few tears. Jacob opened his eyes and gazed into mine, causing my heart to swell as I realized all the previous hostility in his gaze had been replaced with complete adoration. "I love you Jake," I whispered, loving the way the words tasted.

Jacob closed his eyes again and placed his forehead against mine. "Please say that again."

I smiled. "I love you, Jacob Black."

Jacob pulled me closer and leaned down for another deep kiss that made my knees weak. With little effort, he picked me up off the ground and positioned me on the hood of my truck. I set my feet on the front bumper and Jacob placed his hands on either side of me, making sure I was secure. He leaned against the grill of the truck with my knees on either side of his chest, and finally I sat comfortably at his eye level.

"I love you too, Isabella Swan." Jacob lifted my left hand and intertwined our fingers, gazing down at my engagement ring.

I blushed as he shifted his stare back to my eyes. "Is this you saying yes to my proposal?"

"Yes," I blushed, watching the smile I adored so much spread across Jacob's face and I knew that was all he had been waiting to hear. "I'm sorry it took me so long for me to figure everything out."

"I've waited all this time Bells," Jacob shook his head. "And I had myself convinced that I would walk away for good the next time you broke my heart. I hate to admit this, but I would never be able to stay away from you for very long. I would have waited forever if I knew that one day you would be mine."

I smiled warmly as I watched Jacob study every feature on my face. His overwhelming joy warmed the dark recesses of my chest as he leaned forward and captured my lips in another passionate kiss. Jacob pulled me against him as he took advantage of no longer holding himself back. Soon he let me go, leaving me just as hot and flushed as his skin was to the touch.

"I still can't believe you chose me Bells," Jacob whispered. "It was something I always wanted, but I thought for certain that it would never happen."

"What can I do to convince you, Jake?"

Jacob reached down and picked up my left hand again, running his thumb over my ring. "This is enough," he smiled at me. "I'm sure it'll take a while for me to realize this is real, but every time I forget," he squeezed my hand. "This will remind me."

He placed my hand back on his chest, and his heart beat against my palm again. We remained in silence for a while, enjoying each other's company. I glanced up at him and Jacob stood motionless in front of me, his eyes closed again, his breathing deep and even. I reached up and touched the soft skin on his cheek and he leaned into my embrace. "Jake," I whispered, wondering what was going through his mind.

Jacob's eyes captured mine with an intensity that nearly took my breath away. I had never before seen him gaze at me with such adoration, and a sudden thought gave me chills.

Jacob took a deep breath and slowly sighed, never taking his gaze from mine. "I didn't think it would feel like this," he whispered, almost to himself. "I never thought this would happen to me."

I trembled as he placed his hand on my face, the other still held my hand over his heart. "Jake, did you... imprint?"

"I don't know," Jacob shook his head, almost like he was trying to wake himself up from a dream. "But I can't imagine it was anything else. It's like nothing I've ever experienced."

"But," I stared at him in disbelief, loving the feel of his heartbeat against my skin. "I thought you didn't imprint on me."

"I didn't think so either," Jacob sighed. "I spent all this time forcing myself to stay away from you and not express my true feelings for you, but when you came here and told me everything I needed to hear," Jacob squeezed my hand that still lay on his heart. "Everything I needed to breathe, everything I needed to live. Bella, everything is just the way it should be. When you said that you loved me, when you gave me permission to love you back, my life became complete. You are my life now, Bella. My entire existence is to keep you happy, to keep you safe… And if that isn't imprinting, then I don't know what is."

"But-"

"Don't worry about it Bells," Jacob cut off my words and looked deep into my eyes. "It doesn't matter if I imprinted or not, I don't care about that. What matters is that you're here, with me, and nothing's going to change that. Not as long as I'm breathing."

My heart swelled as my fiancé captured my lips in another tender kiss, leaving my head spinning and me wondered why it had taken me so long to realize where I belonged. But at least I was here now.


Hooray! :D
I'm currently developing my next set of chapters, so I apologize if I'm M.I.A. for a little while... Plus I need to catch up on reading all your fanfics! Life can get a little crazy sometimes, which it is at the moment... But I promise I'll update a.s.a.p! Thanks for all your support, reviews, PM's... You guys are awesome! ;D