Vorstag was sulking. Ever since our fight, he'd been lagging behind. Hell, he'd even fallen behind Verulus, who I'm sure was both comforted and scared by the fact.
Why couldn't he understand why I had to do this? Yeah, he'd never felt manipulated by and done evil in the name of his race, but if he had wouldn't he want to right all his past wrongs too? This was something I had to do. I'd made up my mind the second I realized Sosia, that broken woman who's rebuilt herself over and over with bitterness and hate, was the Nord that pushed me to become the crusader I was today.
She needed saving because of me back then, and she needed saving because of my forsworn race now. I wouldn't let my actions break her a second time.
After we finished this cannibal business, I will go to Markarth and force the jarl to put an end to the Forsworn's torment in the Reach. With or without my partner.
"So, Saber," Verulus said suddenly, jogging up to my lead when it became clear Vorstag was taking up permanent residence at our party's rear.
I waited for him to continue, and when he didn't I glanced at him and prompted, "Yes?"
"I wanted to know if there was something going on between you and Vorstag."
I stiffened. "What makes you think that?" Was it that obvious? I know we'd been cold to each other for the last several hours, but that's how our relationship always was. We'd fight about something stupid and he'd apologize when he finally figured out he was wrong. It's how all the partnerships in Skyrim functioned. But maybe this is what I needed, to talk about it with someone who'd valiantly listen and whom I'd never have to face again. "I mean, yeah," I sighed, "But it's always been like this."
"Oh," he said looking at the ground, expressionless. "I mean, I figured there was something, since you were partners and all…"
"Exactly!" I said giving him a forced smile. "This happens in partnerships all the time."
"All partnerships?"
"Yeah, it happens in friendships, relationships, families. Heck, even brothers go at it sometimes."
"Families?!" Verulus exclaimed, turning white and then green. "And brothers?"
"I mean, it's just something that happens," I said, slightly recoiling from his outburst. "I'm sure you've had a similar thing happen with your own mother at least once."
"My own mother!?" Verulus exclaimed, recoiling himself. "Saber, I'm not sure what kind of household you were raised in, but in Cyrodiil we do not tolerate incest!"
"Incest?!" I say, stopping dead in my tracks and whirling at him. "What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about sexual relationships!" The priest exclaimed in an all too squeaky voice. "What are you talking about?"
"Oh my gods!" I balk, face flaring red. "I swear, Dibella, what are you—no, Verulus, I was not talking about sex!"
"Then what were you talking about?" Vorstag was at my side, bending forward slightly to highlight the pertinence of the question.
"By Talos!" I exclaimed, nearly falling over from his sudden manifestation. "I—I wasn't talking about sex or relationships or anything of the sort!"
"We established that already." Verulus said crossing his arms bitterly.
I gulped. I didn't like this. I was caught off guard, I had no idea what to say next. This was a new feeling for me. I couldn't remember the last time I'd been backed into a corner. But here they were, the last two people I wanted to talk to about my emotions, waiting for me to reveal my pent up thoughts. My brain rolled over and over, trying to figure out a way to escape the conversation gracefully.
"It doesn't matter anymore," I said futilely, waving the conversation away. "A complete misunderstanding." I winced at how juvenile the attempt was and glared at the prying priest. Then, deciding to throw him under the cart as punishment for getting me into this mess, I added, "The priest was just assuming we were in a relationship. How ridiculous is that?"
"Why would that be ridiculous?" Vorstag asked softly, straight-faced.
My mind was wiped blank again. I faltered, trying to gather and string the right words.
But then I stopped.
How had I not seen it before?
I was supposed to be the manipulator, the one that could read other people.
How had I not seen how Vorstag felt about me?
I looked up at him, perplexed. His broad, Nordic face stared back at me, both anticipating and hesitant for my answer. I noticed how is eyes quivered over mine, trying to take all of me and this moment in, a moment he hoped he could treasure forever.
No, I had seen it before. I just didn't want to admit it to myself. He saved me countless times and I'd saved him double that, sure, but Vorstag genuinely cared for me.
I recounted the way he swooped to my aid back in Reachcliff, the way his fingers hovered over my wounds and cradled my face a heartbeat too long.
The way he always went out to touch me when we shared our thoughts, but awkwardly ended up patting my shoulder.
The way he was overly protective at times and others not at all.
The way he didn't want me to emotionally ruin myself by digging up my past skeletons. I bit back a bitter laugh. He didn't even know the half of it.
But finally, the way he would rage against and mess with Verulus (who's feelings for me, up until this point, I was also unaware of).
Vorstag was falling in love with me.
And I was terrified.
"Never mind," Vorstag said gruffly, turning away from my stricken face. "We better get going or they'll begin to suspect something's up." He shuffled away, noisily shifting the great sword on his back as he anticipated the coming battle. "Let's use the secret entrance this time."
"Wait what's going on?" Verulus asked sharply, turning to me. "There are other people here? Who's waiting for us?"
"Don't worry about it, priest." I said quietly. It was now my turn to silently follow my partner. I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts of the tall, broad shouldered, blond man in front of me. "Just do your part. That's all I've ever done."
This was going to be a tough battle.
