Remember the Truth
There is this song I once heard. I heard a lot of songs, but the current situation makes me remember this one song. Because it fits. It fits the situation our two friends our in.
"You try your hardest to perfect your explanations...
You lie until they've run out of questions"
Soi lied. Yoruichi lied. I can not stand people who defy the truth and lie. But for these two… I'll make an exception.
Soifon lied, yes. But mainly to herself. And although it's a crime worse than lying to someone else, it is also something she could not help doing. When she was left by her mentor and best friend, her heart broke. It shattered in a thousand little pieces. When that happens to someone they start to think. A person they once trusted and respected so much… it must have been something they did themselves that caused this pain.
For Soi the mistake became that she was not worth caring about. She told herself many times that her sempai had no other choice but to leave. But subconsciously her mind made up another version. A version in which it was her fault. If only she tried harder, than maybe Yoruichi-sama would have stayed.
Slowly this version pushed away her conscious one. And it resulted in the shattering of her heart. It resulted in hatred so strong, that even the sight and apology of her beloved master couldn't straighten her thoughts. She lied to herself and now to Yoruichi… until both of them believed her words and had no further questions.
"So
many lies swirling,
All around you,
You're suffocating,
The
empty shape in you,
Steals your breath,
You're suffocating."
Yoruichi had also lied indeed. Her I find harder to forgive. She saved a lot of people by leaving Seireitei. But the price she paid was too high for my liking. Give up one life for many others is acceptable you say? Why? Who was the person who ever made up that ridiculous thought? If this one person has a greater importance to you than all the others combined, no price is too high.
The day before she left, it indeed seemed Soi was more important to her than anything else. But when given the choice, she went to her long time friend. Not to the recent addition. She too told herself she had no other choice. Had she done anything else, others would have suffered and died. So what else could she have done?
But again, her subconscioushad a way of its own. Thoughts about guilt entered her mind. Caused by the wrenching pain in her heart. These two friends had lived years alongside each other. They had trusted each other with everything. Being ripped apart was painful. And Yoruichi knew that her pain was nothing compared to what her friend must have felt.
So out of guilt her mind made up excuses. Soi was strong and could deal with everything on her own. The only reason they ever had anything to do with each other was because of a deal made when both were still nothing more than children. She perfected her explanations. She perfected them so that no one had any further questions about her sudden departure and the abandonment of her student.
"Logic
forces me to believe in this,
And I have learned to see,
And I
can only say what I've seen and heard,
And only you can
choose,
And every choice you make will effect you,
Suit your
own self."
As I stated before, the pain in their hearts and the lies in their minds need to fade away before things can be like they were before. As I also said, this takes time. So let's skip forward. Only a few weeks after the confrontation. Yoruichi slowly got her place back in the noble Shihōin family, and kept out of Soi's way during this time. It all changed when the second division office got attacked by a huge amount of Hollows.
---
'Sting all enemies to death, Suzumebachi!'
She had already stripped off her captains haori, and was only clad in the military outfit. Her zanpakutō now firmly attached to her wrist she dashed forward. Around her already several of her subordinates lay, either dead or unconscious, while many others continued to fight alongside her.
She sidestepped the katana that came straight at her and Suzumebachi hit the man's bare right arm. The poison spread in the shape of a butterfly, the famous hōmonka had appeared.
'You bitch!'
His face twisted in pain and anger and without a second thought he came full at her. She bend trough her knees a little, waiting till he reached her so she could plant the second hit on his arm. A sudden movement on her right made her jump back however. Just in time as another hollow had aimed his sword at her.
The jump had been too quick and she had nearly lost her balance. Nearly, because a dark hand was at her arm and held her up. 'Be careful, Soifon.'
Soi's eyes widened. 'Wh-what are you doing here?'
Yoruichi shook her head. 'We will talk later. Now just focus on the fight.'
Soi nodded and her arm was released. She shot a quick glance at Yoruichi who just replied with a small smile. Then they both turned towards the rapidly approaching men.
Once they joined forces, the fight ended quickly. The two moved besides each other like they never had been apart. A machine working on full power. Their movements and thoughts were exactly the same. Defence and attack were stronger than their opponents could handle. Their beautiful cooperation made the Hollows retreat with their tails between their legs.
As the fourth division members entered the military grounds they looked at each other and shared a short smile before Yoruichi bowed and left. Soi sighed and shook her head while the smile still played around her lips. Maybe, just maybe, it was time for another talk.
---
Their chance to talk came soon enough. After the fight the story quickly spread across the shinigami. It was romanticized of course, but like every rumour, the core was still the truth. Former and current Second Division Captain joined up to fight one of the most beautiful battles in recent history.
To no one, except maybe Soifon herself, was it a surprise she stood at the Shihōin mansion several days later. While being led through the enormous place memories of past times played through her mind, causing a smile to appear on her face once again.
'Shihōin-sama? There is a guest to see you.' The servant knocked at the door several times until it cracked open slightly.
'Who?'
'Who do you think? Idiot.' Soi spoke before the servant had a chance to reply.
Immediately the door opened completely to reveal a very tired looking Yoruichi. At the sight of Soifon a big grin cracked through.
'Yo.'
'You going to let me in, or what? You said talk later and well, now is later.'
Yoruichi scratched the back of her head, still grinning like an idiot. ' 'Course. I wouldn't dare let you stay outside.' She gestured for the servant to leave and Soi to enter.
Soi closed the door softly behind her but remained to stand in front of it. Yoruichi sat down and looked at her expectantly.
'I think we might need to talk again.' Soi started. 'I mean… I-I think both of us were not really in the right mood to talk last time. We... we should solve these problems between us.'
Yoruichi nodded. 'At least I agree with you on that. But how do you plan on doing that? I know, trust me, I know that I made some stupid mistakes in the past. The biggest of them was leaving you.'
She raised her hand to stop Soi, who had already opened her mouth, from speaking.
'Please... Let me finish. I don't know if I can say this another time. I shouldn't have left you. I broke my own heart when I walked away. Every step I took from this city, away from you, made my heart shatter a bit more. It never was my intention to hurt you. Please trust me when I say that. Although I know that I should have let you know where I went and why, you should know that all I did was to keep you safe.
'Don't... don't tell me you would have died for me. Of all my subordinates you were the only one I cared, and still care for. It might have been your job to keep me safe but I felt it was the other way around. When we first met, your presence, it was... it was intoxicating and I had never met anyone like you.'
Yoruichi smiled and shook her head.
'You were so very strong and unpolished, but still pure, selfless and I greatly admired you after that first time. I had everything I could ever wish for and you had absolutely nothing. Yet it was you who was the stronger one, the truly happy one.
'Ever after that time I tried to change. You never left my thoughts and when we met that second time I thought luck was on my side. You talked to me like your equal, and I truly believed I deserved that. So in the time following that, I changed. I became more like you, while you became more like me.
'You had protected me since the beginning. When we went into South and people harassed me, it was always you who would keep me safe. But when I realised you had become too much like me it felt like my job to protect you. And when I left with Kisuke, I thought I was protecting you.
'I wanted to say goodbye, honestly. But Kisuke... he said it would hurt you. That if I went to you, you would want to come with me. And that would end everything you had worked for. Because you had the power to become someone so very strong and important. I realised I couldn't go to you and end everything. I couldn't hurt you. I figured leaving you would be protecting you.
'So please... please forgive me. I know my excuses aren't worth anything, but it is all I can offer since it is the truth. I understand if you do not ever want to talk to me again and I will leave Seireitei if you ask me to. But still I beg you to forgive me. It is all I can do right now.'
She stood up and let her eyes wander Soi's face. The younger woman didn't express any emotion. She just stood there, emotionless and speechless. Her eyes that were directed at the floor suddenly looked up, straight into golden ones.
Yoruichi tried a small smile, but when Soi still didn't reply she quickly dropped it. Minutes passed while both stood staring in each other's eyes. It was Soi who broke the silence by letting out an amused sigh.
With the speed only known by the second division captains she locked Yoruichi in a hug.
'You should know that there's no way I wouldn't do anything you ask me to.' She mumbled with her face pressed in the other's shoulder. 'I forgave you the moment you stepped in that last battle. And don't say it is just your fault, we both screwed up. I should have had more faith in you. I'm sorry.'
Again they stood in the same position for several minutes. Soi's head against Yoruichi's shoulder and her arms securely wrapped around her waist. Yoruichi on her turn had buried her nose in the younger girl's hair, with her arms around her shoulders.
'Baka.'
---
Being remembered is a great thing. If only they could see I never left them. They simply were too blind to see me. But at least they now remember, which is a start. Although I fear it will take while before they can completely see me, the start is there. The start is always the beginning, but also the end. What end it will be I am not sure about. Only time will tell I guess. What, cat got your tongue?
---
AN: Guess the one week turned out to be a bit longer, eh? Not that anyone cares, but hey. So I will immediately tell the two of you that are reading this that next week there also won't be an update. I'm going to Strasbourg with school. Some debate stuff at the European Parliament. But since this update wasn't at the right time I might be able to squeeze in another update on Sunday or Monday. Don't know yet.
Oh yeah, someone told me that Yoruichi is apparently Ooc. Which I don't agree with. Unlike what a lot of other people write, she actually has a serious/not constantly flirting side which is obvious in the anime/manga. Combined with the way I made the relationship between her and Soi start, I don't think she's really that Ooc. Slightly maybe, but call it artistic freedom.
I'll try to write a better chapter next time, but I'm extremely busy at the moment, so sorry for the lack of... well, quality. The song at the beginning is "Breathe Today" by Flyleaf, in case ya didn't know.
