Kissing her mouth, Chakotay explored gently until she made the little sound he was already growing to love. He slid his hands around to begin unbuttoning the top of her dress, pulling away the fabric and pressing his lips against the soft, white skin as it was revealed.
Tugging his shirt free of his trousers, Kathryn shivered as her dress slid down off her shoulders. The short sleeves slipped low, only catching on her arms. She dropped her foot back to the floor, neatly stepping out of her other shoe. Guiding him towards the desk, she gasped when her thighs hit the cool metal.
She wound her fingers into his hair, pulling him close. Her voice was deep in her throat. "You know I don't share well." Kathryn insinuated her leg between his, brushing against his thigh. "There are some things I just want to keep to myself."
Her laying claim to him, and to what she wanted from him, was incredibly sexy. Leaning against the desk with her dress bunched up and her hair tousled, she gave him a look that sent his heart soaring. He kissed her hard, sweeping his tongue through her mouth again and again as her hands clenched in his hair and she ground against his thigh. The need to breathe broke them apart and he moved away to pull the dress over her head, yanking off his own shirt as well.
Breathing hard, desire coursed through him. Wanting to slow himself down, he bent to kiss the soft skin of her stomach. There was so much of her he had yet to explore. Licking his way across her belly, Chakotay knelt in front of her, letting his hands stroke leisurely along her legs. He kissed slowly up the inside of her thigh, brushing his mouth across her panties, then back down the inside of the other. The scent of Kathryn's arousal was his undoing. He'd intended to spend more time but the need to be inside her was utterly overwhelming and he wasn't sure how long he could wait. Standing in front of her once more he pulled her hard against him and kissed her, letting his fingers tangle into her hair.
Reaching for the clasp of his trousers, she undid it quickly. Sliding one hand inside the tight fabric between his shorts and the trousers she was speedily removing, Kathryn found the heat of his arousal. Sighing in excited anticipation, she forced his trousers down then off in a shuffling dance they had to perform together.
Running her fingers greedily along the firm muscles of his thighs, she set her hands on his lower back and tugged him in between her legs. His hands in her hair drove her wild, and the sound of his heavy breathing made her even wetter than she'd been in the turbolift. She wanted him like she'd wanted the captain's chair. Kathryn needed him. Kissing him roughly, she nibbled his lower lip and moaned anxiously when his hand cupped her naked breast.
The bedroom was only metres away, but it might as well have been light years. She moved her feet, letting his bare thigh slip home between her legs. The contact against his skin, even through her panties was enough to make her whimper, something that might have been his name, in some choked language of desperate wanting.
Chakotay's hands were shaking as he ran them down her back and inside her panties, stroking her butt under the thin material and pulling her forward to press harder against his leg. Her whimpers washed over him until the aching need was too much to ignore. Pulling the fabric down, he bent to help it off her calves, then slid his hands under her thighs to lift her onto the edge of the desk.
She wrapped herself around him, pulling at his shoulders to bring him closer. His arm stole around her waist, and he braced one hand on her lower back, the other guiding him into place before returning to the softness of her breast. Moving forward, he pushed into the slick heat of Kathryn's body, groaning at the tightness that embraced him. Shivers ran up his spine and down his legs and he gasped her name softly.
Sighing as the aching emptiness was replaced with the heat of him within her, she tilted her hips towards him, finding the best angle before he began to move. She barely had to ask with him. Chakotay read her body as easily as her heart. His hand was rough and incredible on her breast.
Her breath caught in her throat. Instead of whimpering, she moaned into his neck. Kissing clumsily up his neck, she found his mouth and hovered there. The cold metal and glass of the desk were a sharp contrast with the heat of him. She ran her calf over the back of his thigh, pulling him closer before she locked her legs around his waist. Kathryn caught his shoulder and clung to him tightly. The strength of his arms made her safe, even perched on the edge of the desk. She found his eyes, dark and intense, and held his gaze. "Chakotay, I feel you."
The words brought unexpected moisture to his eyes and the sudden rush of tenderness took him off guard. Kathryn saw through him. He hadn't ever expected someone, even her, to know him this well but in the time they had been friends she had worked her way past every barrier. Now that they were so much more, her gentleness was almost painful, but he craved it with every breath.
He needed her, and because of some miracle orchestrated by the spirits or the universe, he had her. It was still almost impossible to believe.
Cupping Kathryn's face, he stroked his thumb across her cheek then let his forehead rest against hers, breathing in her breath. He closed his eyes for a moment against the ache that threatened to split him apart. He felt her too, her body wrapped securely around him but more than that her essence, teasing and dancing against his own. Chakotay knew her spirit and she knew his, and the knowing soothed the rawness that he was just now becoming aware of.
Dropping down his back, her fingers clung to his spine as they fell. Kathryn left one hand there and brought the other to his chest. Panting in the void between fulfilment and want, she brought her lips to his thumb and kissed it sweetly. "Don't let me spoil your rhythm," she said, half-teasing. The rest of her heart knew, awestruck, how privileged she was to hold his heart in her fallible hands.
She'd wait, breathy and welded to him because they belonged. Relativity would let them have all the time in the universe. "I've just never had anyone like you."
Kathryn's words and her teasing tone pulled him back, and the need rushed through him in a renewed burst of heat. He kissed her mouth soundly, grounding himself in her taste and the eagerness of her tongue against his as he began moving in her again. Lowering his mouth to her shoulder, he bit softly, feeling her shudder against him, then licked his way up her smooth neck. At her ear, he stopped to lap at the beads of sweat along her hairline then nibbled at her earlobe. "You'll never have anyone but me again," he growled softly.
Sliding his hands under her thighs, he lifted them higher and held them tightly as he thrust. Needing more, he moved harder, deeper, until he was pounding into her, her breath in his ear and the clench of her fingers against his skin urging him on.
Her breath ran ragged and out of her control. Balancing her legs against him, she clung to him with one hand and clutched her knuckles to whiteness. She never would have surrendered so much to anyone else. Kathryn knew another man making that statement would have infuriated her. Chakotay was allowed. His promises were truth.
Her fingers sank into the flesh of his back, finding resistance in his smooth muscles. As he buried himself deeper and harder within her, her perception began to spin. Plasma fire licked its way down from her neck and settled to smoulder around him as he thrust within her. Writhing back, she gasped when he pulled her close again. Sweat mixed on their skin and beaded up in her hair around his fingers.
She loved having his hands in her hair.
Holding her close, the scent of her all around and inside him, Chakotay's need overrode all else. Heat pooled in his belly and formed tight bands across his thighs. She was slipping a little when he thrust, the desktop slick with their sweat, and his hands slid down to her hips, holding her in place. He groaned into her hair, the desire for release coursing up and down his spine. Feeling the shudder pass through her thighs, he knew she was close.
More than anything he wanted to feel her let go. He loved giving her this pleasure, loved hearing her cry out and making her come apart underneath him. Knowing she trusted him with her body and her heart was the most erotic thing he could think of.
He pushed into her, his thrusts shorter and less controlled. Reaching blindly for her hand, he grasped it tightly and wound his fingers into hers. Good, so good. The thought flashed across his mind, or maybe he'd spoken it aloud.
When he took her hand, Kathryn was lost. She was no longer aware of the cool metal of her desk or the sweat clinging to her hair. All she had was him and the deep, wet pulse of him finding his way deeper and deeper. The spinning heat became a rolling wave, making her jerk unexpectedly into him. Her hips ground against his stomach and her head snapped back.
She crashed back into him, desperate for the steadiness he could provide. Kathryn buried her face in the sweat of his neck, gasping then crying out. She shuddered, already shattering around him. She flirted with the breaking point, then crested across it. Her thighs shook, then the trembling had her body. From toes to teeth, all of her was undone and his.
It was her cry as she shivered and clenched around him that pulled him over the edge. When her head dropped back, he pressed his mouth to her throat, suddenly desperate to taste her, sucking hungrily at the skin there, as everything he was or ever would be pulsed into her. White light sparked and flashed through his head and he pulled her tighter to his chest, wanting her as close to him as she could be.
He was shaking, everything was shaking. Waves of peaceful warmth flooded Chakotay's body and her name echoed through his mind. Burying his face in her shoulder, he spoke it softly and her arms tightened around him in response.
Kathryn sagged into him, using his weight as a balance to steady herself. With her hands wrapped around his shoulders, she waited out again becoming human. She tangled her left hand in his hair and sighed, absolutely content. "Now," she croaked, her throat still raw. "That's a use for my desk."
He laughed against her skin, and lifted up carefully, gently extricating himself. "I was worried that desk wasn't going to survive. I thought I might have to build you a new one." His legs were weak but he stood beside her for a moment, liking her arms around him. She was beautiful, flushed and tousled, and he bent to kiss her, lazily drawing her tongue into his mouth.
Little tremors continued to pass through him and the room was cooling the sweat on his body as he regained his breath. Her skin felt chilly as well. "Come and lie with me," he suggested, helping her off the desk. He grinned when she took a minute to get her footing. It would be a miracle if either one of them could walk in the morning. He couldn't say he particularly cared.
"I don't know where you'd get the wood for a new desk," she replied, half-seriously. Kathryn clung to his arm, waiting for her feet to be able to hold her. She pushed her hair back, admiring the mess of what had been her paperwork. It was better off that way.
Following slowly towards her bed, she paused and stretched. She might be sore. She might have also bruised her fingers or her thighs. It was impossible to tell through the haze he'd left in her brain.
Crawling up the bed next to him, she paused and worked a few tangles out of her hair. "I forgot how blissful the beginning of something can be," she said, eyes twinkling. "Or how much fun."
Chakotay grinned in acknowledgement. "We do that well." He didn't like to think of her with anyone else, even in the time before they'd known each other, which was, admittedly, ridiculous and more than a little childish. His moment of jealousy vanished when she settled down against him, laying her head on his chest and sighing in what he recognised was pleasure. Pulling the covers up around them, he sunk gratefully into the softness of her bed.
"I don't remember it ever being quite like this," he said, stroking his fingers up her arm. "I've been in love before, more than once, and it's not that there was ever anything missing..." He trailed off, thinking of the differences.
"Perhaps there's a reason you're not in love with them anymore," she said thoughtfully. Trailing her hand slowly over his chest, she spent a fleeting moment thinking of Justin and Mark. She would have been happy married to Justin, at least, that's what her memory liked to believe. He was intelligent, fiercely loyal and a good officer. She would have been a good science officer and they would have spent their lives together, reasonably happy.
But she never would have studied command.
She had loved Mark, and they'd been quietly happy. Kathryn would have come home to him from the stars and been content. Would she have been? Could he understand the weight of one hundred-fifty lives and the thrill of bringing them home? Would they have had children that she left on Earth with him because he had no inclination to live on a starship?
She realised she'd been quiet a long while and kissed his chest in apology. "At this point in my life I can't imagine being in love with anyone but you. No one else could put up with me."
Chakotay traced his fingers up and down her spine, waiting quietly while she thought. The love he'd known had been in his earlier years, and Kathryn was right, there were reasons that both the relationships had ended. His life had taken a complicated series of twists and turns that had left him feeling as though solitude was inevitable. Perhaps that was the main reason what he had with Kathryn felt so different; he'd never thought he'd have it again. But he didn't think so.
He smiled at what she'd said. Running his hand up her arm, he explored the gentle curves of the muscle. "Here's a secret for you, Kathryn. You're not as difficult as you think."
She giggled a little, shaking her head slowly before she lifted it from his chest. "I'm awful." She protested. "I work too much, forget every kind of anniversary and even my own birthdays. I get off the bridge at all hours of the night and can barely have a civil conversation before I've had my coffee."
Kathryn moved up his chest, lying across him and kissing him gently. "Although, there are a few things I can do reasonably well. I need excellent company for most of them." Toying with his chin, she let the innuendo float between them. "I don't think I've been this happy in a very long time. I don't know what I'd do if I had to admit I actually do deserve it."
He widened his eyes looking at her. "You're right," Chakotay said slowly. "You're a warp core disaster. How did I not see this before?"
Drawing his hands up her sides, he smoothed them over her shoulders and down her bare back. He loved her lying on him. Her thighs were damp, warm and intimate against his skin.
When she raised her head to talk to him, he noticed something. His fingers traced over the red mark on her throat, already starting to purple. "You're bruised," he said, sheepishly. "We might want to get that fixed. I'm not sure your uniform goes high enough to cover it."
Kathryn followed his fingers with her own, finding the mark on her skin. She blushed as she found it. She didn't mind bearing it, after all, anything of him was important. The Doctor was going to have a meltdown. She was sure he'd treated sexually related injuries before. Not hers though.
There were faint marks from her nails on his shoulders, there might be stronger ones on his back. Nothing anyone could see through his uniform.
Still blushing, she kissed him. "Maybe I need a tattoo," she teased, kissing the one on his temple.
"Mmmm," he grinned lazily. This playful side to Kathryn was endearing, possibly even cute, although that assessment was likely to find him on the wrong side of a phaser if she ever found out. Stretching up to kiss his forehead put her breasts comfortably within his grasp and he took advantage of the opportunity to cup them lightly, running his thumbs gently over the soft undersides.
"Back to the real world tomorrow," he commented, wondering if it were feasible to run the ship from her bed. His eyes were heavy and the post-coital bliss made it difficult to move. Not that he was planning on going anywhere just at the moment.
She kissed his chin, then sighed happily. His hands on her breasts made it impossible not to smile. Kathryn relaxed, entirely comfortable with him. Tomorrow was light years away.
"I can't remember the last time I took a day off. I haven't touched a report or a PADD." She looked up at him sheepishly. "Is that terrible? Or is that what you meant by time to myself? It was so hard to take before. Somehow you make it easier." She toyed with his chin. "You don't mind not going back to your quarters right away?"
He minded going back to them period, but living together less than a week after they'd decided to have this relationship was unreasonable, even he had to admit.
"I like being here with you," Chakotay said easily. His hands slid smoothly down her back. "It's good that you're relaxing, Kathryn. I'm more than willing to do my part to make sure that continues," he teased. "All for the good of the ship, of course."
Turning to kiss the fingers that stroked along his chin, he sucked one softly into his mouth, nibbling the tip before letting it go. He hadn't realised how starved he was for touch. "You've had to put your entire life on hold for close to three years." He pondered his next words. "I know being the captain has to come first, and I'll never fight you on that, but I will try to help you find a better balance if you'll let me." He knew she would; she was already doing it.
"There must be things you want for your life, dreams you have for the future that've been put aside? I'd like to know," he finished.
She tugged up the sheet to cover her legs and studied his smile. He was so genuinely curious that she couldn't refuse him. Kathryn kissed the mouth that had so recently held her finger and smiled. "I was supposed to be home in a few weeks," she began. It was a lifetime ago. "If your ship hadn't been so fascinating to the Caretaker, Mark and I would have been married."
She quirked her lips into a shy smile. He'd understand she wasn't pushing. "I'd like to try being married. I've never been that far and I think I'm ready to find out who I am in a partnership. Being captain is lonelier than I imagined and I wouldn't mind having someone to come home to." Kathryn wanted to bite her lip and stop but he was looking straight at her and she just couldn't halt her tongue. "I want a family. I had all the time in the universe, but now time is running away from me and fitting in time to sleep is already difficult. I can't fathom how much more difficult a baby would be- But I...well I don't back down from a challenge. Even if it's foolhardy of me."
Her words came out in a breathless surge, but her eyes were sparkling with something he'd never seen before. In a rush, Chakotay understood that this was something she was verbalising for the first time.
A series of images flashed across his brain. "You'd be an incredible mother, Kathryn," he said softly. What would her child look like? What would their...he forced the thought from his mind. It was too soon. It was ridiculous to even think about it.
It was wonderful. She wanted children, family, a home, a husband. He hadn't known.
"Balancing everything would be difficult," he acknowledged carefully. "Maybe..." He turned his face away for a moment in a futile attempt to hide his delight. When he turned back she was watching him anxiously. Waiting for his response, he realised. "Maybe taking more time for yourself...or any time," he smiled, "is a bit of a dry run for that?"
"It is worth a try," she agreed shyly. Kathryn couldn't read his expression and that made her stomach twist. She wasn't nervous, perhaps it was excitement or (dare she even think it) hope. When he looked away, she was relieved. Her heart was too naked. She hadn't dared admit how much she wanted these domestic things. How could she when she had so many responsibilities?
"I'd like to try being a mother," Kathryn replied, holding on to him for courage. With his arms around her, such dreams didn't seem too far out of place. "I know it would be a great deal to ask of my husband. Mark-" she paused and felt along his arm until she found his hand. Chakotay was here now; Mark was the past. "Mark wasn't sure it would have been fair of us to have had a child, not when I'd be gone so often. Being on Voyager is different. It's not something I've ever imagined working but maybe it-" She stopped and kissed his chest, again terribly shy. "It's a close-knit community. He or she would grow up loved."
"Starfleet's not easy on families," Chakotay agreed. He couldn't imagine her having a child she couldn't raise herself. Kathryn was very maternal; it was one of the qualities he loved about her. She took in every stray they came across and made it her personal mission to do what she could for them. How could she say goodbye to a son or daughter for months at a time? It never would have worked; her heart would have broken over and over. He gave Mark grudging credit for that understanding.
Voyager was something entirely different. He threaded a hand into her hair and massaged her scalp gently with the pads of his fingers, considering. Little Naomi was growing up happy and healthy, a secure child with the resources of the entire ship at her disposal. With the number of crew members who had left behind children - sons and daughters, nieces and nephews - she was well and truly spoiled in the way that a child should be. Sam had once complained to him that some days she had to get in line to hold her own daughter.
Kissing the top of Kathryn's head, a surge of love for her welled up. "Our -"
Damn.
He cut himself off but it was too late. The word was already out there. "Your," he corrected sheepishly, "child would be loved and cherished by everyone, Kathryn. It's not such a crazy idea."
Kathryn jumped as soon as he made the verbal slip. She couldn't even save herself. She sat up, smiling down at him with tears in her eyes. The idea of having his child filled her chest with warmth. She stared down at him, trying to find a way past the lump in her throat.
How long had she been in love with him? Since New Earth? Before that? He was so many things that she wanted in a husband. It wasn't fair to think of him that way, but she couldn't help it. They fit together, supported each other and he knew her. They'd been intimate before they'd been lovers and there was something so profound between them it terrified her.
"I might need everyone," she said finally. She rested her hands on his chest, staring down at her fingers. "And you?" she ventured shyly. "Are children something you want?"
Chakotay relaxed a little, watching Kathryn's response to his slip. The last thing he wanted to do was to put any pressure on her.
"I love children." He smiled up at her. "I used to think I would be a father someday. Children are very important among my people, and their care and welfare is considered to be the responsibility of the entire community." Reaching up, he brushed away the tear that was hovering at the corner of her eye, wondering how much to tell her.
"My life took a series of turns that left me thinking I would never be a parent. I never expected to fall in love again, let alone be thinking about building a future with someone." He ran the edge of the sheet through his thumb and index finger, thinking.
"Life in the Maquis was violent and dangerous. I gave up everything I had in order to fight for something I believed in. I've never regretted it, but it didn't come without a cost." Stroking Kathryn's arm, he pulled her down gently onto him again and wrapped his arms around her. "I quit thinking about what would come next because, after a time, I didn't think anything would."
"I can't imagine," she replied softly. Kathryn had been depressed enough once that she'd felt like her life was over but she'd never been in that kind of constant danger. Starfleet wasn't safe, but it was stable, in its own way. Her father had been gone a great deal when she was young, but she'd known he was reasonably safe. Starfleet allowed for families. It wasn't perfect, but it could be done. She squeezed his hand, knowing he wouldn't know why she'd needed to.
Her curiosity about his past lovers was less important than the idea that he loved children. Of course he did. Everything else about him was almost perfect. He had the kind of patience that she envied, and she could picture him never running out of stories to tell. He'd be a far better father than she would a mother. Chakotay's perception of her was far too idealistic.
"I should count myself lucky then," she murmured before kissing his chest. "You lived long enough to make it here." She left the idea that he was here with her unsaid, but she thought he knew what she meant.
"I thank the spirits every day." Even more since he'd come to understand what she meant to him.
He rolled them so she was on her back, partially beneath him. His fingers brushed through the hair that framed her face, stroking it back, then traced gently over her eyebrows and down the bridge of her nose. Her eyes were a soft, warm blue, the colour of the berries he'd picked as a child on the hottest summer days.
"You have to understand, Kathryn," he said quietly. "I was lost. I had no past and no future. Then I met you and everything changed." Chakotay traced her mouth with his index finger, pausing carefully at the little groove in the centre of her top lip. He bent to brush his lips over it.
"I never fit anywhere," he continued. "It was all right, I'm more than capable of forging my own path. I've been reasonably happy and I've had a lot of experiences that I wouldn't trade for anything."
His fingers continued across her jaw and down her neck and shoulder, meandering their way carelessly along her side. "I want a home, and a wife," he met her gaze and smiled. His hand stroked against her hip and came to rest on her belly. "And yes, I'd love children."
His leg between her thighs made the heat there spring back. As much as her body ached for him, her heart was full of sympathy. Isolation was one of the hardest things she'd dealt with in her life. Kathryn didn't have his strength, or his faith that he could do the right thing. She didn't see regret in his eyes; that made him all the more incredible. However lonely he'd been on the way to where they were together, Chakotay hadn't given up hope.
She knew that feeling; how stubborn one had to be to keep going and here they were. His hand left a trail behind it on her skin like a comet. When his palm settled on her stomach, she shivered. She'd been willing to let motherhood go. Voyager needed her more. Her lips parted and she breathed in quickly. It wasn't like she didn't know him. They'd been together almost every day for the last three years. He knew her; more than that, he loved her. Kathryn kissed him slowly, lingering on his mouth instead of speaking. She didn't know what to say.
The kiss was a promise. Her mouth was warm and soft, and the gentle tangle of her tongue with his sent light sparks of pleasure and comfort down his spine.
Chakotay pulled back to look at her, marvelling once again at what was there in Kathryn's eyes. No one had ever looked at him like that. Maybe it was because no one had ever loved him as she did. The thought sprang up from nowhere and the truth of it struck him.
He should leave. It was late and they were both tired. Morning would come quickly, they had spent the entire day and evening together, and they had responsibilities that could not be disregarded. He should climb out of her bed and go back to his quarters.
Instead he bent to kiss her again, unable to resist the taste of her and the way her body rose to meet his. She was his future. He'd known for a long time that she owned his heart and always would. What he hadn't known was that in her eyes, he was her future as well.
Bending her knee, she lifted up her leg and wriggled deeper beneath him. Chakotay fit neatly into her hips, and he was careful not to be too great a weight on her chest. She lowered her hands to his back, holding him gently. She wondered if he was thinking about leaving. Both of them did need to get up in the morning; when he was kissing her, she didn't care.
Her breathing gained speed along with her heart rate. If they didn't stop - but why should they? Their kissing now was slow and sweet but no less passionate than it had been before. Their hunger sated, they could take the time to explore. His thigh pressed against her and a tiny shift of her hips made her arousal return full force. "I know you should go, but I don't know if I can let you."
"Not just yet," Chakotay murmured in agreement. Her moving against him, shifting her legs to take him between her thighs, caused a rush of desire in spite of his best intentions.
She was soft and warm, and - he bent to capture her mouth once more - sweet, so sweet. He couldn't get enough of her.
Kissing his way down her neck got him the reaction he loved, a soft sound of want in the back of her throat. Carefully he moved past the place he had bruised earlier to her shoulder, creamy white and smooth under his lips. Her hands stroking through his hair and on the back of his neck were distracting but he took a moment to taste the dusting of freckles he found under her collarbone.
He'd stay if she asked him. Kathryn knew beyond a doubt that he'd stay forever if she whispered how much she wanted him to. They had time, she reminded herself. His nibbling down her shoulder made the catch in the back of her throat turn to a whimper. The pleasant heat of being in his arms wasn't enough. The aching want settled down between her thighs and not even grinding against his hip could ease it.
Swallowing hard, Kathryn caught his cheek and drew his attention. "If we don't have time to finish this-" she hissed and tried not to arc her body up against him. "If we don't- we-"
Groaning softly, Chakotay turned his face to kiss the palm of her hand, biting gently on the fleshy part at the base of her thumb. He shut his eyes to avoid looking down at her, flushed and breathless, her lips swollen from their kissing. Kathryn was right, it was late and not the smartest idea to start something they wouldn't have time to finish.
Frustration surged through him. He wanted her but it wasn't fair to make her the bad guy. He'd known going in that this was how it would be - personal time couldn't be allowed to infringe on work. Damn it, it shouldn't be a problem. He wasn't eighteen years old.
Even if she made him feel that way.
Opening his eyes he caught her watching him, concern and desire battling across her face. He kissed her forehead, a kiss intended to soothe them both.
"It might be a good idea if I go now," he admitted.
She shook her head slowly. That gut reaction was far from logical, but she didn't want him to go. Kathryn knew it was cruel to keep him and that they'd both be yawning and wondering if the marks on their necks were still visible in the morning. Wasn't that worth it? Tomorrow she could look at his hands on the console and remember them on her skin. That thought made her smile and the warmth of it crept through her.
Shaking her head again, this time more gently, Kathryn put her finger across his lips. "To hell with good ideas," she murmured. She resisted his attempt at calm and kissed him hungrily. With her lips still nearly touching his she whispered, "Can you really sleep instead of making love?"
She took his breath away when she was like this, teasing and hungry, seducing both his mind and his body. Arousal poured through him, along with a sense of reprieve at not having to leave her just yet.
He was incredibly happy.
Shaking his head, he tried not to look it. "Well, I don't know," he said seriously. "I'm tired. We have to be up in a few hours. We did agree to make sure this didn't affect work..."
Kathryn stared at him blankly for a moment. She couldn't possibly have worn him out that quickly. Chakotay's expression was sincerely apologetic and if his body wasn't pressed so closely to hers, she might have believed him. Making a mental note to never play poker with him, she grinned. "I could make it easy for you." She put her hands on his shoulders and rolled him back on the bed.
Slowly running her hands down his chest, then his stomach, she pulled her hair back out of the way and beamed up at him. "The bridge is still going to be there. Our data PADDs and paperwork is still going to be there." Winking at him impishly, she wrapped her fingers around the steadily hardening proof he'd been teasing her about being tired. "Some things might not be." She dropped her head and ran her tongue lazily over the tip before she took him into her mouth.
Chakotay laughed when she flipped him onto his back. He couldn't put anything over on Kathryn, she knew him too well, but it was fun to try from time to time.
Her hand encircling him made him gasp. "Are you sure?" he teased breathlessly. "There's a lot of work oh-" He closed his eyes as a wave of pleasure slammed through him. "Oh Kathryn." His voice was a strangled moan.
They'd never done this before and the excitement of it raced up his spine and down his legs. Her mouth was incredible, soft wet heat surrounding and suffusing him, erasing all thought from his mind.
Unable to speak, she hummed, wickedly pleased with herself. Running her mouth down his length, she let her teeth brush him just a little before she returned her mouth to the swollen tip. Licking and sucking, she kept one hand on the base and slid the other across his stomach. Her flat palm ran over his chest, catching the little jerks of his body as she worked him towards climax.
He could barely say her name at all and Kathryn knew their work was forgotten. Chakotay was hers, and the idea that she could have him so completely spurred her on. Knowing she was the cause of his ragged breathing and racing heart, she loved him more for teasing her. They were so well matched and yet, she could still surprise him.
Twisting his hands in the sheets, Chakotay abandoned himself to the moment. Moving a little against her in spite of himself, he writhed in an attempt to get closer and pull away at the same time. The sweet, torturous ache crept across his stomach and he moaned her name, imploring.
Blood pounding in his ears, he opened his eyes to watch her. If the idea of it was sexy, seeing it was unbearable. The look on her face said she knew exactly what she was doing to him. She did something with her tongue and the resulting surge pushed him too close to the edge.
"No, Kathryn." His voice was garbled and he wasn't sure he was forming actual words. "Don't- I can't-"
As much as she loved hearing him beg, she wasn't greedy. Kathryn stopped, pulling her head up with a twisted smile. She stretched out on his chest, lazily tracing incomprehensible patterns on his skin with teasing fingers. She rested her chin on his firm muscles beaming like a cat who knew where the cat nip was.
She slipped up to kiss his chin. "Aren't you glad you stayed?"
His body screamed at him in dismay. He'd wanted to finish, but not without Kathryn. Grasping her hips, Chakotay resettled them so that he was between her legs, the length of him pushing up hard against her. The pressure afforded him some relief and he cupped her face in his hands. "That does beat reports on the status of the leola root stores," he agreed, still breathing heavily. She shifted a little and he pushed up hard against her in an entirely involuntary response. Everything in him ached to be inside her, but not yet.
Stroking his hand up her back, he buried it in the hair at the base of her skull and pulled her down easily. Her mouth opened quickly to him and he slipped his tongue in, probing deeply until she trembled. Rolling them over, he took a breast in his mouth, laving and sucking at her nipple, letting her response guide him. The need for her flowed through him, as much a part of him as his own blood, and he wondered again how he had survived so long without this.
Being held was her reward and Kathryn was halfway between laughing and begging him to ease the wet ache that had been slowly driving her crazy. His mouth on her breast sent the ache from a smouldering need into breathy, electric desire. Moaning and dragging her nails up his back, she twisted her hips beneath him.
His teasing now was retribution and she hoped desperately that he was aroused as she was. Surely Chakotay couldn't hold out much longer. "Please-" she murmured into his hair. "God, Chakotay, please-"
Smiling a little, Chakotay lifted his head and looked regretfully at her other breast. Sometime soon he was going to take all the time he wanted to lick and taste his way along her entire body - but not tonight.
He moved over her, kissing her mouth hungrily. Kathryn arched up into him and he licked lazily at her jaw, nuzzling just below her ear. "Such impatience," he murmured teasingly, although he knew the game was over. She could feel exactly how aroused he was and all pretense flew out an airlock when he was this close to having what they both wanted.
Even still he played for a moment before entering her, stroking her softly with the tip, sliding in a little only to pull back out. But his legs were shaking and his control was perilous. He touched her face with the palm of his hand. "Look at me," he called softly, sliding into her only once her eyes were on his.
Kathryn held his gaze as long as she could. His dark eyes filled and claimed her as much as he did, buried within her. He sank deep, making her gasp in shock. She'd had enough time and teasing to be more than slick and desperate. Trembling, she fought to hold his gaze. She needed to arc into him; to rub tighter against him but for this moment Kathryn stared into his eyes.
With a moan in her throat, she breathed, "I wouldn't be so impatient if you weren't so-" She couldn't do anything more than sigh raggedly. She didn't need to.
Chakotay chuckled hoarsely and bent to kiss the little beads of sweat off her forehead. Kathryn was hot and tight around him and he ground against her, pushing in as deeply as he could. "It's not my fault. You're- " He groaned, the desire on her face throwing him off balance as he tried to find a rhythm.
Stroking down her thigh, he hooked his hand under her knee and pulled her leg up higher against his hip. "Kathryn." He whispered her name, loving that he was allowed to say it and to know her this intimately. Unbelievably beautiful, she was panting underneath him, pushing up to meet his thrusts. He stroked his fingers across her stomach and the memory of their earlier conversation make him thrust harder into her. Sliding a hand up to cup a breast, he rubbed her nipple with the flat of his thumb. The whiteness of her shoulder called to him and he bit her lightly.
Burying his face in her neck he breathed deeply. "Don't hold back," he whispered. "Take what you need."
Stealing his hand from her breast, she dragged it down to her clit and panted into his neck. His strong, sure fingers made her head start to spin. With her nerves already on edge, and with the blood still coursing through her body from before, even fumbling fingers would have made her arch up into him.
But he didn't fumble. How he'd managed to find a rhythm was beyond her, but so was her knowledge of the universe past his touch. Grinding into his hand and his hips, she caught her breath in triumph. "That," she hissed into his neck. Her little gasps were becoming moans, and she pulled him in. Bending her leg further up, she eased them ever closer together, letting him deeper into her body. "Exactly that."
"Yes," Chakotay murmured softly. "Yes, yes." He pulled back a little to watch her face, careful to keep the rhythm she'd shown him. Kathryn abandoning herself to his touch, taking her pleasure from him, was the sexiest thing he'd ever seen. He stroked in and out of her, circling her clit with his fingers as she moved against him. His hand was wet with her desire and the remains of their earlier lovemaking, and the knowledge of it sent shudders running down his spine.
His own arousal was spiralling out of control, hot stripes pulling at his legs and stomach. Kathryn moaned as he thrust into her, jerking erratically against him but he stayed with her, not letting up, knowing she was close. Her hand grasped his shoulder, pulling him down to her, fingers digging into his skin and he groaned. "Let go," he said into her ear. "Come for me, Kathryn."
The heat of his touch settled in her stomach, as seemingly infinite as a matter-antimatter reaction. Her head spiralled upwards, losing touch with her body. Yet, she was still acutely aware of his hand on her clit and the arm by her chest. His legs were solid and hot against hers and the sweat of their bodies was indistinguishable.
Her fingers spasmed, momentarily losing their grip on his shoulder. She shook, her breath caught between a sob and a cry as she crumpled into space between his chest and the bed. She found his eyes with tears in her own. The white heat in the back of her skull ran rampant through her body, as if her fingertips could glow. When she felt her heart in her chest, the thudding of the organ surprised her, as if she'd been dead.
The air filling her chest dragged her back, and the tingling ran through her body as if every atom were vibrating. Perhaps they were. The sob finally became a laugh, and she closed her eyes.
Chakotay wrapped her in his arms, still hard inside her. Watching her shatter so completely touched him, and he knew from the way her eyes had sought his that something profound had happened. He held her as she trembled, tears on her cheeks even though she was half laughing. Kissing her face, he soothed her until the shaking stopped and she looked up at him with a shaky grin.
She kissed him almost shyly and when her tongue danced gently against his, desire pulsed through him again. Reaching down, he stroked the soft inside of her thigh, pressing it down into the bed. Taking a shuddering breath he pushed as deeply into her as he could, letting her body squeeze and caress him. The scent of her surrounded him and the tremors that continued to pass through her sent shivers down his spine. Burying his face in her neck he thrust hard, then again, then a third time that pushed him into colour and light and Kathryn, only Kathryn.
After the build up and all the willpower they'd both expended, his long-withheld climax calmed them both. Kathryn held him close, wanting the safety of his arms more than freedom from the weight. Her head still reeled, and even her teeth were tingling. She could sleep for days, or she'd never need to sleep again. It was impossible to be sure.
When he rolled off after a sweet eternity, she lay next to him, hand entwined with his arm, and stared up at the ceiling. Smiling lazily, she turned her head towards him on the displaced pillow. "You're a man of many talents," she teased. "That wasn't in your Starfleet Intelligence file."
Chakotay snorted. Taking her hand, he entwined their fingers and rested them on his stomach. His breathing was starting to slow, but every muscle was in a state of delicious torpor.
"Kathryn," he started more seriously but then stopped, completely helpless to put words to what had just happened between them. Shaking his head, he looked at her and smiled. "You do inspire me," he answered, "but I can't take all the credit." He leaned over to brush her cheek with a finger, studying her eyes and liking what he found there.
"That was..." His words trailed off inadequately, the effort of speaking almost too much. He was entirely sated and completely at peace.
"Worth getting that look from Mr. Paris and a raised eyebrow from Tuvok when we'll keep yawning on the bridge tomorrow," she finished for him, curling on her side and beaming at him. Having him was worth a whole lot more than that, but Chakotay understood. He knew he was entirely through her defences.
She wasn't usually sentimental. Kathryn tried to be pragmatic about her relationships, when she even made the time to have them. Sex with Mark had been good; they'd loved each other, but Mark had never made her cry. And he certainly wouldn't have enjoyed the desk as much as Chakotay had.
"I could get used to this," she sighed, laughing gently. "I'm not even sure I can feel my feet."
Rolling to face her, Chakotay smiled lazily. "That's the sign of a good night," he agreed. He took her hand and kissed the inside of her wrist.
"I should go back to my quarters," he said gently then grinned. "For real this time." It was not pleasant to think of leaving her, but morning would be chaos if he stayed. He had no uniform or toiletries and they both reeked of sex, not that he was complaining. But it meant skipping his morning shower was definitely not an option.
Kathryn sighed as she sat up. She ran her tongue slowly over her teeth and grinned, they were still buzzing. Shaking her head, she glanced over at the mess of their clothes across her floor and then back at him. "Don't put any of my uniform on by accident," she warned, dragging herself out of bed to find her nightgown.
"We should try this in your quarters," she offered. Her skin was sticky and she took her robe from the closet instead. Her hair made her wince as she ran her fingers through it. "Is your bed different than mine?"
He watched in appreciation as she walked to the closet, comfortably naked. Then with a grunt of regret he got up to retrieve his own clothing from the other room.
Pulling on his trousers as she spoke, he looked up in surprise. The idea of her in his bed was extremely appealing. "It's about the same," he offered, thinking of the size. She would fit nicely, tucked up beside him. "Maybe a little softer." Chakotay pulled his shirt over his head and perched on the side of the bed with his shoes and socks. He worked them quickly onto his feet.
Sitting for a moment, he watched her fret at her hair and thought how difficult it was to leave her. With other lovers after a certain amount of time together he was eager to return to his own space, finding an element of restoration in the solitude. Time with Kathryn left him refreshed and relaxed, even when their activities were strenuous. He smiled, thinking of her underneath him.
Crossing over to him, she wrapped her hands around his neck and hugged him to her belly. Running her fingers through his hair, she sighed contentedly. "I think it's worth exploring." Still blissfully warm, she smiled down at him.
"Assuming this is something we intend to keep doing," she said wickedly. Kissing him lazily, she tried not to yawn. "I think we could make it a habit."
"I could get used to it," he admitted happily. Reaching up, he cupped her cheek. She was adorable, sleepy and tousled.
He stood to kiss her, lingering a moment in her arms. "Go back to bed," he said softly. "I'm pretty sure I can find my own way out."
Moving quietly through the corridor, Chakotay was amused. It had been a long time since he'd had to sneak out of a woman's room. Even though the crew would know they were together, discretion was still the better part of valour and he didn't mind being careful.
Still, he couldn't help but wonder how long it would be before neither one of them would have to leave to go home.
