Chapter 7 – The Preparations
Scorpius had barely slept. He could not stop replaying the evening's events over and over again in his head, with a twisting knot of disgust and regret in his stomach. What had he done?
He had not wanted to argue with Rose; he had not wanted to say the things he had; he had certainly not wanted her to throw her engagement ring down at his feet and tell him the wedding was off.
But he had.
And so, she had.
He was no longer engaged; he no longer had a fiancée (maybe not even a girlfriend anymore either); he would not be getting married in six days' time. Was that what he wanted?
But no, Scorpius knew, despite what he'd said in the heat of the argument, that wasn't what he wanted at all. He had been bottling up his emotions when it came to Rose and the wedding for some time, unleashing them all unexpectedly in a moment of selfishness and weakness.
Of course Rose was stressed about the wedding, and of course she had been feeling belittled by her friends' success. Everything Scorpius had said was true, but that didn't change the fact that it had been cruel and heartless of him to voice those things to Rose. Rather than using them against her, patronising and alienating her, he should have stood by her, given her strength when she needed it most.
Scorpius realised that now. And he was deeply disgusted with himself.
All he'd wanted was to marry the girl he was in love with. And despite what he'd said that evening, he did still truly love Rose, and he did still truly want to marry her. He had made a vow to her long ago, at somebody else's wedding, in which he'd promised to do exactly the opposite of what he'd just done.
"I'm gonna stand by you through everything. I took all the good times – I'll take the bad times too. I want every single aspect of you, good and bad, easy and difficult, beautiful and ugly. Every single insecurity, every single flaw, every bit of darkness.
"I want you when I'm losing my mind, when the world is full of darkness.
"And I want you when I'm flying, when life is never better, and everything is bright, and beautiful, and pure."
And maybe he'd only been seventeen when he'd made such a promise, but he had believed in it then, and he believed in it now.
But he had said and done unspeakable things, and for him to grovel and beg Rose for forgiveness would be belittling to her. He'd done it before, of course. His entire relationship with Rose had been comprised of him screwing things up, making mistakes, and then begging for her forgiveness and making promises he always failed to keep. But this was on a whole new level. Could they honestly rebound from such an argument, and still be able to have a happy and healthy relationship?
Scorpius did not expect Rose's forgiveness; he could never, and would never, forgive himself for the things he'd said to her last night. He was not half the man he'd promised to be for her.
But even if it was indeed the end of his relationship with Rose, Scorpius could not avoid seeing her. Even if it was to certify that they would not be getting married, they were no longer together, and Rose hated him indefinitely, they at least had to see each other again and talk about it. And the longer they delayed, the worse it would be.
Scorpius made his way down the stairs of Ron and Hermione's house.
After Rose had stormed from the room, Scorpius had been able to do nothing but crumple to the carpeted floor, running the returned ring through his fingers, and crying uncontrollably.
At which point Ron had walked in.
The man had looked uncomfortable, like he did not want to be there of his own choice, but had been forced by Hermione (which Scorpius strongly suspected). Scorpius could not even feel the slightest bit of embarrassment that everybody upstairs had surely heard every word of the argument, or that Ron was now seeing him huddled on the floor of his lounge, crying his eyes out.
Ron was there to ask him to leave, Scorpius guessed, or to chastise him for making such a racket, or yell at him for hurting his daughter, or order him to stay away from their family indefinitely.
But to Scorpius' surprise, Ron had done none of those things. He had sat, he had talked, and he had listened.
And then he had suggested Scorpius stay there for the night; it was too late to go home, and as Hugo was out, Scorpius could sleep in his room. Scorpius had agreed. Partially because he was too tired to go home, and partially because he knew that, even though it would be painful for him to know Rose was separated from him by only a wall, he would have no choice but to face her in the morning. If he went home, how was he to build up the strength to come back and face her?
As he stumbled down the stairs, dressed in his pyjamas and dressing gown, Scorpius knew Rose was in the kitchen, and he knew she was with her friends. He expected her to be relaying the events of last night to them in her own words, even though they'd likely all heard it themselves.
Whether Ron and Hermione were there too, he couldn't tell.
Scorpius took a deep breath and forced himself to go into the kitchen, mentally unprepared for what he was actually going to do or say once he saw Rose again for the first time.
He had been right; Rose was sat at the kitchen table, her legs hunched up to her chest like she was a small child, with Janey, Gwen, and Taylor sat around her, listening, and trying to soothe her.
Everybody fell silent the moment Scorpius entered the room, save for Rose taking a slight, shuddery breath. Their eyes locked briefly, but she pursed her lips and looked away, as though in great pain.
Scorpius' heart lurched. Rose too was dressed in her pyjamas and dressing gown. Her red hair was hanging limp and lifeless, plastered to her sullen face, and her eyes were heavy and weary. She looked like she'd had little sleep too, and had done a fair share of crying herself. The self-loathing Scorpius already felt for himself deepened.
Not knowing what he could possibly say or do to break the uncomfortably tense silence, Scorpius set about making himself a cup of tea. As he clattered the mugs around, acting like it was the most casual thing in the world, he felt the girls' eyes boring into the back of him. He wondered what they'd said to Rose – whether they'd spoken in favour of him, and assured her he hadn't meant it and that they could get through it, or whether they now loathed him, and had agreed that he was a complete arse and Rose was better off without him.
With two steaming mugs in his hands, Scorpius turned back towards the table. Everybody but Rose was glaring at him. She herself was still clutching her knees to her chest, like a small child, and was staring with lost, empty eyes, at a spot on the table.
Scorpius set one mug down in front of her; still, she didn't look up. He set his own mug down on the table next to hers, and dragged an empty seat over to place in front of her. Settling himself down so he was sat facing Rose, about four feet between them, Scorpius returned Janey's glare in silence.
She held it for a while, challenging him, until finally she heaved herself away from the table, the others following her lead. "We'll be in the lounge," Janey sighed, as the three of them excused themselves from the kitchen. Closing the kitchen door so Rose and Scorpius were left alone, Scorpius knew they'd be intently eavesdropping outside the door. He had a feeling Ron and Hermione weren't home.
Still, Rose did not look at him.
The ticking of the clock was the only noise to be heard. It seemed unnaturally loud, full of condemnation.
"I was out of line," Scorpius said eventually.
No 'good morning,' no 'how are you,' no desperate 'I still love you.' He wanted to be as straight-forward and honest as he could – he didn't want to skirt around the heart of the issue like he would have done when he was a teenager.
"I'm not going to make excuses for myself, because you deserve better than that. I was out of line, I said incredibly hurtful things – of which I am not proud, nor am I sure I really believe – and I acted unfairly and unforgivably."
Rose looked at him then, her eyes heavy with pain and exhaustion. But she remained silent.
"Please talk to me," Scorpius said quietly.
And she did. "I don't… know what you want from me," Rose spoke in a strained voice.
Scorpius wanted her to put the ring back on her finger. He wanted her to say she'd marry him, that she still loved him, and would always forgive him for being the foolish idiot that he was.
"I want you to be happy," he said weakly. "And I don't know anymore, if I make that better or worse for you."
Rose took a noticeable gulp. "I don't know anymore either…"
Scorpius was a little stunned, but he nodded in understanding. "Do you still love me?" he asked, his voice breaking.
Rose broke eye contact with him. If Scorpius was not mistaken, she looked somewhat guilty.
"I do," she said in as broken a voice as he had used. She winced at her poor choice of words. "Yes," she corrected, "I still love you. I'm always going to be in love with you."
But it was lacking in the warmth that should have accompanied such words. It was clinical, full of pain.
"And do you want to marry me?" Scorpius asked, not a proposal, but a lost, pained worry.
"I don't know," Rose admitted.
Scorpius nodded again, trying not to let his internal distress show. Her words cut him deep, but it wasn't for that reason that he felt most anguish. It was the realisation that he had said those same things to her last night, except in a way that was noticeably more vindictive and cruel.
If he was feeling pain at her meek confession, what must she have felt when he had yelled the same thing at her last night?
"Not ever?" Scorpius asked quietly, a slight edge of hope. "Or not now?"
Rose had been succeeding in keeping a serious, unresponsive sort of demeanour up until then, her eyes and voice lacking in any sort of emotion, oozing stability. But at that point she broke.
"I don't know," she choked out, her voice wobbling, and tears suddenly surging from her eyes, hot and urgent.
Scorpius acted impulsively, the only way he knew how. Lurching forwards from his chair, he enfolded Rose in his arms, kneeling before her and holding her tightly to him. He ran a soothing hand down her back, unable to remember the last time he had been even that intimate with her, and she buried her face into his shoulder, clinging to him like a lost child.
"I – I do want to marry you," Rose hiccoughed into his shoulder, still holding him tightly, her tears dampening his dressing gown. "But you were right. And I don't know… I'm not sure, if I walk down that aisle, that I'll be doing it for the right reasons."
"Shh," Scorpius gently soothed her, not wanting her to get so worked up – seeing her in that state broke his heart. "I wasn't right," he dismissed in a humble voice, still holding her. "I used your insecurities against you – that's not healthy or okay in any kind of relationship. Especially not the girl I'm about to marry." He gulped. "The girl I was about to marry," he corrected, heart sinking again.
Not that Scorpius could see it, but there was still a gentle indent on Rose's finger, from where the engagement ring had lightly pressed into it for the past four months.
Rose tensed, before finally letting go of Scorpius, and hunching back in her chair. The tears weren't streaming anymore, but her eyes were still red-rimmed and weary.
Scorpius felt foolish on his knees in front of her. He debated whether he should back away and sit back on his chair, or stay there at her feet. He compromised, sitting back on his own chair, but dragging it forwards so that his and Rose's knees were touching.
"You can't blame yourself," Rose said in a quiet, serious voice, avoiding looking Scorpius in the eye again. "Everything you said about me was true. Maybe I didn't realise it, or maybe I did… Either way, you were right, and everybody was thinking it. I've been a real bitch..."
Scorpius flinched; he did not like that word. Least of all if it was describing Rose, and even more so if she was describing herself with it.
"It still wasn't okay for me to confront you about it in the way I did."
Rose didn't look like she believed Scorpius in the slightest, or that she was ever going to be convinced otherwise.
"Rose, you have been under a lot of stress and pressure recently – and I mean even before the engagement. I'll admit, I was so busy at work, so involved in my training, that I probably didn't give you enough attention as I should have."
"I never wanted attention," Rose said desperately.
"No, that's not what I meant," Scorpius said hurriedly, annoyed at his poor choice of words. "I mean… support," he said. "I mean, I should have been making time for you, but I didn't. And that's no excuse," he added. "I'm not trying to blame you for anything. But I recognise now, that I probably wasn't supporting you as much as I should have."
"It's not your responsibility to make me feel valuable," Rose denied, shaking her head sadly.
"It is though," Scorpius insisted. "As your boyfriend, fiancé, husband, or even just your friend," he said sheepishly, "– whoever I'm supposed to be to you – if I'm not making you feel good about yourself, what exactly qualifies me to have such a title? And even if it's not my role to make you feel valuable, it certainly isn't my role to make you feel invaluable."
"You don't have to worry about that – I do that all by myself."
Scorpius' heart was breaking with every word she said. "How can I help you, Rose?" he pleaded, hating that he felt so helpless.
"You can't," Rose said in that same lost, broken voice. "I'm starting to think I'm just… not a very pleasant person to be around anymore. I have become hostile and toxic, and constantly bitter – I've changed a lot since my school days. And not for the better. I'm blaming everybody else around me for who I've become – punishing them for moving on and leaving me behind."
"You haven't been left behind, Rose," Scorpius said gently. "Your life just isn't heading in such a defined direction as everybody else. That doesn't make you any more or less accomplished in your own right. But I think maybe I overlooked that – I got too caught up in my own life to remember that you were as big a part of my life as my career – even bigger, in fact."
"I just don't think I'm worth it," Rose said, in her weakest voice yet.
Scorpius was furious now. Not at Rose, but at himself, for ever having failed to fill her life with so much love and support that she honestly believed such a thing. "You are to me," he declared. "Oh my God, Rose, forget what I just said – you are the biggest part of my life. I told you that when I proposed. I told you that you were my everything, and I can't believe I failed so horribly as to let you doubt that."
"But when we were fifteen –" Rose began weakly.
Scorpius was taken by surprise. Their problems as fifteen-year-olds were long in the past, and completely irrelevant.
"– everybody told me you were bad for me. They told me you'd hurt me, and use me, and that you were dangerous. We never even stopped to consider that those things could be completely true –"
"They're not true," Scorpius said defensively, horrified that she could even think such a thing.
"Not about you," Rose pleaded, "but about me. You've more than proven that those were wild, untruthful speculations, but what about me? What if I'm not good for you? What if I'm not good for anyone?"
"Don't be ridiculous, Rose. You are so important, to so many people – myself included. Ever since you've been a part of my life, you've hugely improved it, and I think it's about time I started repaying the favour."
"You do," she insisted, "every day. And I think I took that for granted too."
Scorpius was somewhat glad that they were having such a deep, meaningful heart-to-heart. He hadn't fully realised how little they'd really delved beneath the surface and talked about their emotions – at least, not in a long time. Maybe it was his fault, for prioritising his Healer training, or maybe it was Rose's, for letting her insecurities about her friends make her jealous and narcissistic.
Or maybe, and it seemed far more likely than either of the alternatives, they were both to blame.
Both of them had been taking the other for granted, and maybe they were starting to realise that now. And although Scorpius found it enlightening, he still felt helplessly in the dark about the more trivial problems that had been raised last night. Were he and Rose really not engaged anymore? Would there really be no wedding next week? And if he couldn't call her his fiancée anymore, could he at least still call her his girlfriend?
"I know I can't apologise for the things I said to you last night, Rose," Scorpius said.
"Then don't."
He gave her a questioning look.
"I don't want you to apologise, Scorpius," Rose sighed. "You didn't do anything wrong. Don't argue," she said when he made to protest, the smallest of smiles playing on her lips. "And you can't entirely blame yourself either. I said things I regret too – things I didn't mean. I'm the one who…"
Called off the wedding.
But Rose trailed off, unable to say the words, her small almost-smile disappearing immediately. It was the elephant in the room – the thing they were both avoiding mentioning.
"Maybe it was just too soon," Rose said sadly. "Maybe we weren't ready… maybe we were still both too young."
Scorpius gulped. He did not believe that for a second. He was ready to commit himself to Rose Weasley; he had been ready for some time now. Like he'd told Ron when he'd asked for his permission to ask for Rose's hand, he could marry her tomorrow, or in fifty years' time, and his feelings towards her wouldn't change in the slightest. If he wasn't ready then, then he wouldn't ever be ready.
But he knew in his heart that he was.
The question was: was Rose ready?
Scorpius didn't want to pressure her into anything, and after the mess that the previous night had been, he wouldn't be surprised if she never wanted to marry him. But how could he afford not to take that chance? He had already lost her so many times before…
"We went about this all wrong," Rose said, before Scorpius could say anything. "We should have been united, but we weren't. And maybe that was my fault –"
"It was my fault too," Scorpius added quickly.
"– but either way, I think we can both agree we shouldn't have turned our backs on each other."
"No," Scorpius agreed. "No – there was a time when we used to stand together, against the rest of the world. And now," he gulped, "if we're turning against each other…"
"Maybe it just wasn't our time."
Rose's final words were spoken with haunting finality, a little bittersweet. And Scorpius knew that was it; it was over. Maybe not forever, but at least for that moment. He would not be taking Rose Weasley as his bride that weekend.
After having nodded sadly in agreement, Scorpius heaved himself from the kitchen chair, and put it back where he'd gotten it from. Both his and Rose's mugs of tea remained untouched, and now stone cold. He supposed he should just go back home. There was no place for him there anymore.
As he turned his back on Rose (it would be too painful to say anything more to her), Scorpius realised that he now had to go through the awful process of telling everybody that the wedding was off. His heart was heavy indeed.
Scorpius had taken no more than two steps away from Rose before something even more forceful and driving shot through his body. No, he thought fiercely. No, it wasn't over. He wasn't giving up that easily.
"Rose," he said, more aggressively than intended, whipping around to face her.
Rose looked up at him in shock, her eyes wide with questioning.
Before he could think twice about it, Scorpius had closed the distance between them, dropping down onto one knee before her, pulling the engagement ring from his dressing gown pocket where he'd put it last night. He held it out to her from on the floor; no box, but with a bit of dressing gown fluff stuck to the central diamond.
Rose looked alarmed, but Scorpius couldn't be sure whether it was of the positive or negative kind.
"I am well aware that I've done this many times," Scorpius said. "Not this," he added quickly, indicating to the ring, "but, I mean, in the position where I'm begging for forgiveness, quite often on my knees, trying to make up for my mistakes, and always making promises to you that I've failed to keep. I mean, just look at the first proposal," he scoffed. "Have I really done any of the things I promised to, throughout the whole of our engagement? But," he went on, "this time, if you let me – and I really mean it this time – I will never give you any reason to question me again."
"Scorpius," Rose interrupted wearily.
"No, I mean it, Rose. Once again, I acted like an idiot, and I let myself get blinded by things that weren't important to me. But this time –"
"Has it ever crossed your mind that the only reason you've broken so many promises is because you make such unrealistic, unachievable ones?"
Scorpius wasn't sure what to say. "Well – I –"
"Look at me," Rose laughed gently. "I never promised to be perfect – I knew that wasn't reasonable! But I did promise to love you. And I do," she said shyly. "In spite of how many promises to me you break."
Scorpius let out a soft laugh, still holding the ring. He hadn't thought about it like that. Perhaps Rose was right – the only reason he so frequently failed to meet his own expectations was that he always set the bar too high. "Rose Weasley, where would I be without you?"
"I wouldn't want to know," Rose answered coyly, her eyes briefly flickering to the ring in his hands.
"Do you… want to wear it again?" Scorpius asked hopefully. "I mean – not just as a decoration or something – but like, with the, err, expectation that goes with it. Not – not expectation," he stuttered. "But I mean, like, being engaged to me… again."
Rose's eyes were filled with endearment. Scorpius hoped his returned it.
"Maybe one day I won't mess up a proposal to you," he said.
"I'm rather hoping this will be the last one," Rose replied, as coyly as before.
Scorpius couldn't contain the wonderment that filled his body. "You really mean it?" he breathed. "You – you want to be engaged to me again? To marry me? It doesn't have to be this weekend," he added quickly. "We can always postpone it. However long you like – whenever you're ready. And I promise I'll be more help this time and take it seriously. And I will keep that promise, I swear. I –"
"Scorpius," Rose interrupted in amusement.
"Yeah?"
"Can I have the ring back now?"
"Oh, sure, yeah, of course." He fumbled with it as he gave it to her, but Rose slid it back onto her finger with easy grace. She pulled the fluff off. It looked well and truly at home.
Scorpius was still on his knees. "I – yeah – like I said – it doesn't have to be this weekend, if you don't want. I'm happy to wait until you're fully ready."
"I don't know," Rose said. "It just seems a shame, doesn't it? I mean, we do have a perfectly good venue booked; all our friends and family have come home; we've got the plane tickets for the honeymoon…"
Scorpius' eyes lit up, and his heart was once again light. "You really mean it? We're really gonna do this?"
"Together," Rose confirmed. "Whatever happens, whether that's during the engagement, the wedding, or the marriage – we're gonna do it together. And hey, it won't be perfect – and you can't promise me that it will – I realise that now. There will be times when it's difficult, but that doesn't matter."
She reached out a hand to lovingly wind it into his hair.
"Listen, Rose," Scorpius said seriously. "I'm gonna give everything to us – I'll dedicate my whole life to loving you. I won't try to change you; I'll never hurt you – not intentionally anyway; I'll do whatever I have to do to make this work. I'll try to give you everything you deserve. And I can't promise that it's gonna be fine – I realise that now too – or that it's going to be easy, but I'm here if you're ready to try. My whole life, for better or worse, is all yours if you want it."
"Does it ever upset you," Rose asked, smirking fondly, and still lovingly running her fingers through his hair, "that I never say such romantic things to you?"
"Not at all," Scorpius replied with a grin. "You give me everything I could possibly need – I don't need you to say anything."
And then they kissed, Rose leaning forwards in her chair, and Scorpius still on his knees. There was a sense of deep yearning, and a blissful feeling of coming home. Both of them were still clad in their dressing gowns, but it wasn't for that reason that they both felt suddenly hot.
"Is, err, is Taylor going to be at your apartment tonight?" Scorpius murmured.
"No," Rose replied, softly biting her lower lip. "I can make sure she's not."
Scorpius suddenly stood up then, wildly excited, like he'd just remembered something particularly enthralling. Rose watched, with deep amusement, as he raced to the kitchen door, flung it wide open to where Gwen, Taylor, and Janey had clearly been eavesdropping, and yelled, with great triumph, "She said 'yes!'"
It was the first day of August, and the last day on which Rose and Scorpius would call the other their fiancé. Tomorrow, after what had been a rather stressful engagement, the two would finally be wed.
Neither of them had told anybody of the temporary calling off of the wedding, of course – they hadn't wanted to freak anybody out. Besides from the Gryffin-Girls, Ron and Hermione, and Albus (whom Scorpius had felt obliged to tell), everybody else was suitably in the dark.
That day on which they'd reconciled, the young lovers had decided (Rose, slightly reluctantly) to take a day off. Not a single ounce of effort went into the wedding, instead spending the day together, relaxing, and generally enjoying each other's company. It had been a happy relief from all the chaos.
And then later that evening, in Rose and Taylor's abandoned apartment, Rose and Scorpius had celebrated their reformed engagement in a way that they really couldn't have under the same roof as Rose's parents…
The next day they were better than ever. And had remained strong and united during those following four days.
"Guess who's getting married tomorrow!" Janey shrieked, rather unnecessarily, as even though they were all stood in the vast ballroom of the hotel in which Rose and Scorpius would be getting married, they were right next to each other, and the acoustics were rather excellent.
Rose felt a thrilling surge of energy shoot through her.
"Well," Janey said, "I mean, we think you're getting married, but who knows? You might have another –"
"Janey," Gwen said with a condemning glare.
Rose just rolled her eyes. Nothing could spoil her happy mood; she was getting married tomorrow!
People were expected to arrive at the hotel all day, some being there as early as ten in the morning (such as Rose and the bridal party), and others not arriving until the evening. Rose felt exhilarated as more and more people showed up, all gathering in the ballroom, and even though it was chaotic trying to arrange all the final preparations for the wedding, she was immensely happy.
The dress, the cake, the flowers, the decorations – everything was where it should be. Nothing was going wrong. Rose had quite forgotten about Lily's dreaded prophecy, or her list of worst-case-scenarios.
That was, until the evening arrived, the drinks started flowing, and everything suddenly kicked off…
It all started with little Felix Lupin.
Not quite three years old, Teddy and Victoire's son was restless as evening settled, and was kicking up a terrible fuss.
"Victoire," Rose hissed at her, "can't you do something?"
"Oh, no, he's fine," Victoire insisted, gently cooing at her screaming child, bouncing him up and down in her arms.
Rose looked around, embarrassed. There were so many people, and everybody was chatting excitedly in their own little groups, no one really paying attention to Felix, or being bothered by it at all, but it was driving Rose crazy.
"Teddy," she snapped, as the man half-responsible for the irritating child approached, also bending down to coo at his son.
"He's so cute, isn't he?"
"Yes," Rose said drily, "he's adorable. Can you please put him to bed or something though?"
Victoire frowned. "But he likes being around his family," she insisted, gesturing to the room which, admittedly, was vastly made up of Weasleys. "And people like getting to see him."
"Yes," Rose said through gritted teeth, "but these people are not here to see Felix, are they? They are here," she growled, "for me."
Teddy and Victoire were still obliviously fawning over their son, much to Rose's dangerously growing anger. "If we take Felix up to the room then that means one of us will have to stay with him," Teddy explained, ruffling Felix's hair in a cheery manner. The child continued to scream.
"So?"
Teddy frowned, looking at Rose. "Well, me and Vic want to stay down here with everyone."
"Okay, fine," Rose sighed. "How about one of you watches Felix tonight, and one of you watches him tomorrow night?"
Teddy and Victoire looked at each other. It was Victoire who answered. "But then we won't get to be together," she pouted.
Rose was about to start yelling, she knew it. "You live together!" she pointed out. "You're married – you see each other every single day."
"Yes, but not on occasions like this," Victoire said, looking enthralled by the grandeur of the ballroom.
"Okay, fine," Rose gave in, realising she wasn't going to make any progress. She turned to leave. "Just… slip him something to shut him up, alright?"
Rose walked away before she could see the looks of disgust on her cousin and her husband's faces. She knew she was being unreasonable, but that suppressed paranoia was creeping back in. Rose refused to let herself get as hysterical as she had done during the previous week, but suddenly every little fear was working its way back into her mind.
Not that Rose didn't adore little Felix, but she suddenly thought to herself, if she and Scorpius were ever going to have children (which, up until then, she'd hoped they might) it would not be for a long while at least. It was rather ironic then, that the next problem she encountered was pregnancy-related.
Rose needed only to hear the hushed, but shocked murmur of 'you're actually going to have a baby?' from somewhere within a gathered group of her guests, as she'd been storming away from Teddy and Victoire, intent on finding Scorpius.
Rose whipped around in shock, instantly flaring up. "What?" she demanded shrilly, storming towards the group.
Scorpius was amongst them, as were the three Gryffin-Girls, Ebony, James, Roxanne, Dominique, and to Rose's surprise (as she hadn't yet known they'd arrived, or greeted them), the current serving Headmistress of Hogwarts (and Ebony's mother) and her husband (the current Defence Against the Dark Arts Professor).
"Who's having a baby?" Rose growled, glaring at them all in accusation.
Each girl, in turn, looked horrified. Other than Gwen and Taylor, Rose thought them each as likely as the next of being the culprit. Roxanne and Dominique were notorious flirts, as Rose had witnessed on her hen do, and it would be so like them to go and get themselves knocked up right before Rose's wedding.
"Who went and got pregnant?" Rose shrieked, glaring at Janey and then Ebony. They were both in serious relationships, after all, having been with their significant others long enough to maybe be having a baby – even if it had been unplanned.
Janey looked offended. Ebony looked mortified.
"Did you get Ebony pregnant?" Rose yelled at James.
"No," he said indignantly, looking at his wife in alarm. "Right?"
"No!" Ebony confirmed, still mortified.
"Who, then?" Rose demanded again, glaring at the group as a whole. "Who was stupid and selfish enough to get pregnant right before my wedding?"
Everybody looked at each other uncomfortably, Scorpius looking apologetic on Rose's behalf.
"Ah," Professor Bobbin said meekly, to Rose's absolute horror, "that would be me…"
"Sorry," Cepheus Roberts added sheepishly.
Rose herself could not have been more embarrassed, nor more shocked. Not only was it huge and unexpected news that Professor Bobbin was expecting a baby (she was only a year younger than Rose's parents, after all, and her only other child was Rose's age), but the way in which Rose had just addressed the matter had been hugely insensitive and rude.
And even if Bobbin was no longer her headmistress, and she hadn't seen her properly in two years, Rose had so much respect for the elder woman, and was disgusted by how she'd just accused her.
"Pr-professor Bobbin," Rose stuttered, her face flushed with colour. "I – I didn't mean to –"
"You don't have to call me 'Professor' anymore, Rose," Bobbin said, looking uncomfortable.
But Rose didn't think she could possibly address her by her first name. "I, err, I didn't mean to…"
Bobbin looked embarrassed for having put Rose in such a situation, guilty that she was with child.
She was with child.
But Rose couldn't understand it at all. Professor Bobbin was really pregnant? On purpose, or…?
"You're… having a baby?" Rose asked, kind of hoping it was all a misunderstanding, or a wild joke.
Bobbin still looked highly uncomfortable about it all, and Rose didn't blame her. Not only was it awkward enough to be discussing her pregnancy with her former students, but after the way Rose had so shamed her too, it was no wonder she was so embarrassed. Roberts, however, looked delighted by it all. Rose could envision no one more suited to be a father.
"It wasn't, ah, it wasn't supposed to have been public knowledge," Bobbin meekly explained. "Especially not at your wedding, Rose. We weren't telling anybody yet…"
"That was my fault," Ebony admitted, looking almost as uncomfortable as her mother.
"You knew?" Rose asked. But of course Ebony had known; Bobbin was her mother, after all, and Ebony would be gaining a half-sibling.
"Not until now."
Rose now recognised that the shocked voice she'd heard, bringing the unexpected pregnancy to her attention, had been that of Ebony's. So she hadn't known. And Rose didn't care what the conversation had entailed, or how it had been brought up, because she felt immensely guilty for having made Bobbin feel so guilty in turn.
"That's wonderful," she breathed to Bobbin and Roberts. "Congratulations."
Again, Roberts looked thrilled, whilst Bobbin just looked uncomfortable. Had she not wanted a baby? – Rose wondered. Had it been unplanned?
But surely it must have been. Bobbin, being a woman of her age, the headmistress of a school, and already having had a strained, difficult relationship as a mother, never would have willingly tried for another baby, would she?
"Thank you, Rose," Roberts said with a broad grin, his beautiful dimples emphasised, "and to you too, of course."
"I'm – I'm not having a baby," Rose said in alarm, looking at Scorpius, wide-eyed, like he'd somehow impregnated her without her knowing.
"No," Roberts laughed gently, "I meant the wedding."
"Oh." Rose blushed. "Thank you. I'm… sorry for having overreacted."
"That's nothing – you should have seen Melinda's reaction."
Bobbin glared at him, like she did not think it appropriate to share such personal information. Definitely unplanned, Rose thought.
"Are we still all going to treat this like it's such a casual thing?" Ebony suddenly demanded, looking at her mother with disdain. "You're actually going to have a baby?"
"Please stop saying that," Bobbin murmured frantically, glancing around the room in case anybody else overheard.
"Are we just going to pretend this isn't a huge deal?"
"It's not," Roberts insisted. "Your mother and I have been married for three years, and now we're having a baby. It's perfectly normal." He spoke as calmly as though he'd explained it a hundred times (perhaps to a hysterical and disbelieving Bobbin).
"Well, firstly, it's gross," Ebony said, disgusted. "Secondly, you are in your forties –"
"Ebony!"
"– Cepheus is half your age –"
"I'm only twelve years younger," Roberts pointed out.
"– and given the way you so badly screwed up having a child the first time round, do you honestly think this is a good idea?"
Ebony's words were cold but justified. Rose was not angry that such an unexpected scene was being caused (one she couldn't possibly have predicted), but was just rather embarrassed by it all. Everybody else around looked like they'd rather be anywhere else.
"That's not fair, Ebony," Roberts said, coming to his wife's defence, as she herself looked suddenly lost and saddened by Ebony's cruel accusation. Bobbin's relationship with her daughter had always been one of the things, if not the thing, which haunted her most. And they had been doing so well over the past few years…
"I didn't plan for this to happen," Bobbin tried to explain to her daughter in a pleading voice.
"I don't want to hear about the details of how you got pregnant!" Ebony shrieked.
"Please stop talking about it," Bobbin hissed, looking panicked again.
"Why?" Ebony demanded. "Rose was right – you were stupid enough to get pregnant –"
Rose blushed.
"– just like the first time – and yet again you're already shirking responsibility for the poor thing? You're already so full of regret?"
"Ebony," James said warily, before Roberts could condemn his daughter-in-law again. "We don't need to talk about this now…"
"Well, why shouldn't we? You know what," Ebony accused her mother, "maybe you can do the same thing you did with me. Maybe you can just ignore the fact that you have a child –"
"Ebony," James said more firmly, actually looking fierce. Rose rarely saw him get angry with his beloved. "Please, let's not discuss this now. We're here to celebrate Rose and Scorpius' wedding. This can wait."
Ebony did actually look apologetic at that, and glanced guiltily towards Rose. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. "I just…"
"It's fine," Rose lied, still deeply mortified by the whole situation.
"You don't understand what it is to be a mother," Bobbin said sadly.
Ebony glared at her. "And you honestly think you do?"
Rose was once again mortified – hadn't they just finished bickering about it? James was right – this wasn't a conversation for right then. Not because she thought it was overshadowing her wedding, but because it was just greatly uncomfortable for those who it did not concern.
"Ebony," Bobbin pleaded, "if you were in my situation –"
"I would never be in your situation!" Ebony hissed. "You are the very reason I will never want to be a mother – not until I'm a hundred percent ready. I could never do to a child, what you did to me – I could never raise a child under those circumstances. Or rather, as you opted for, not raise a child," she said snidely.
"And you won't ever have to," Bobbin desperately pointed out. "You have a loyal, committed husband by your side – I didn't have that the first time. You have friends and family who'll support you through it all. I regret what happened between us so much. I won't make the same mistakes I made last time."
"So I was a trial run?" Ebony asked.
"No, not at all – that's not what I meant! Listen," Bobbin sighed. "If you were having a baby –"
"Which I'm not," Ebony said shrilly, sharing a frightened look with James.
"No, but if you were –"
"Which we're not," James said, almost as shrilly.
Rose found their behaviour suspicious. It was clear they were both terrified at the thought of being parents – and that was perfectly understandable, of course, given their young age, and both of theirs fear of commitment (it had been a shock when they'd so hastily gotten married) – but Rose wondered if there was more to it. James and Ebony had been married for three years too, even longer than Bobbin and Roberts (if only by a couple of months); had they perhaps discussed the idea of having a child? Had it been a recent point of discussion for the married couple?
"Okay, fine, it doesn't matter," Bobbin sighed. "And really, we do not need to discuss this now. We are here," she reminded them, just as James had, "to celebrate Rose and Scorpius' wedding."
"Whatever," Ebony said, finally losing her patience. She dismissed herself from the group, not storming off like she was angry, but just like she was bored of it all.
James hesitated for a while, as though deciding whether he should follow her or remain with the group. "We're not having a baby," he assured the remaining group for no particular reason, before he too departed, having decided to go with Ebony.
"I'm sorry about that, Rose," Bobbin apologised, looking after her daughter with sadness and longing. "I really didn't want this to get out at your wedding. And I, umm, I'd really appreciate it if this could be kept to yourselves for now." She looked at all her former students with a fierce, steely gaze, like she was still their headmistress.
They all mumbled, everybody hoping to escape the situation as soon as possible.
"Does Kingsley know?" Rose asked tentatively, thinking about what the pregnancy would mean on a more practical scale. Bobbin surely could not remain as Headmistress of Hogwarts if she was to raise a baby. That had been the reason she'd had to give Ebony up in the first place…
"No," Bobbin replied in a small voice. "That's why I wanted to keep this in the dark for a while longer."
But how much longer could Bobbin really delay? It was August – Hogwarts would need a new headmaster in September. It wasn't like Bobbin could raise a secret child!
Rose took in the appearance of her former headmistress for the first time that evening. Even though she was nearing fifty, Melinda Bobbin was truly beautiful, just as her daughter was. Perhaps because of her height, she had a noticeably slim figure, but not even a slight protrusion to suggest she was carrying life within her womb. Then again, Rose did not know how far along into her pregnancy she was. But it was clear, now that Rose knew, that Professor Bobbin was pregnant – not by her non-existent bump, but because she was well and truly glowing.
"Everything will be fine, Professor," Rose said kindly. "With Hogwarts, with the baby – with Ebony."
"I hope so," Bobbin murmured. She perked up slightly, offering both Rose and Scorpius a warm, proud smile. "And as I don't believe I've said it yet – congratulations to you both. I'm sure marriage will treat you well indeed."
Rose and Scorpius shared a smile, with the latter stretching out to squeeze the former's hand. Bobbin and Roberts dismissed themselves from the group to go and talk to people their own age. And as Roxanne and Dominique headed for the bar, Rose and Scorpius found themselves alone with the three other Gryffin-Girls.
"Nice one, Rose," Janey said with dry humour. "That wasn't rude or overdramatic at all."
"Hey," Scorpius said defensively, still holding on to Rose's hand.
"It was just… a bit of a shock," Rose mumbled.
"Oh, yeah, and thanks for assuming it was me who was pregnant! Honestly" – Janey rolled her eyes – "like I'd ever dream of upstaging you on such a huge day."
"Oh, come on," Gwen said, "it wasn't like Professor Bobbin planned to have a baby – especially not for the very purpose of upstaging Rose's wedding. There's a reason she wanted to keep it to herself."
"Yeah, I guess," Janey agreed, using her left hand to flick her fringe out of her eyes.
With the movement, a sudden twinkle caught Rose's eye. She took a sharp intake of breath. "What is that?" she asked quietly, accusatorily.
Janey immediately grabbed hold of her left hand with her right, shielding it from their view. All the colour had drained from her face. "Nothing," she said, too quickly for it not to raise suspicion from them all.
Gwen and Taylor had clearly seen it too, and looked just as startled. Scorpius alone remained oblivious.
"It's just a ring," Janey insisted.
"No," Taylor breathed in shock, grabbing hold of Janey's hand, "that's an engagement ring."
Author's Note: A little bit in the middle there was inspired by Demi Lovato's song 'Yes'
There will be another chapter tomorrow :)
