Welcome to Season 3 of Viva La Bam! I decided to skip Demo Derby. I won't be going in order of the episodes, fyi. The order will more than likely go: Driveway Skatepark, Fort Knoxville, Angry Ape, Rockstars, Mutiny on the Bam, Bamiture Golf, and Mall of Bam.

I don't really like the Uncivil war episode so I decided to skip it. But, I may squeeze it in if I'm bored one day. I'm anxious to get to the Golf and Mall episodes. I've got some cute Bam and Ollie stuff planned for those ones. By the way, I'm loving the image manager feature. What do you think of the cover? Shout out in reviews! Talk to you at the end of the chapter!

Adieu!

Chapter 7: Return to the Golden State

Inhale, breathe steady,
exhale, like you're ready,
if you're ready or not.
~He Is We, Happily Ever After

Ollie's POV:

Dunn had an iron tight grip on me as we barreled up and over the hill in the hummer. We'd been driving around for a few minutes, but Bam saw the mail being delivered and high tailed it to the driveway, and pulled up right beside the front door.

Bam knew I hated when he drove like that, especially when I was just on Ryan's lap with no seatbelt.

The doors open and Bam demanded, "Get me the mail!"

Ryan and Bam collected the mail with me watching from a safe distance, being how I didn't trust the mail box ever since we moved it. It fell on me one to many times and I always made sure to steer clear from it.

I was glad I did, because it fell beside Bam, right where I would have been standing.

"You did that on purpose." Bam acused Dunn.

"You have to cement it in, you can't put it in potting soil." Dunn said, for he too, was sick of the deathtrap we called the mailbox.

"Call Glomb then." Bam said, flipping through the mail.

He handed me a clothing magazine, figuring I'd want it as he passed by me. I followed him inside and sat at the table beside Raab.

There were a few minutes of peace and quiet, joking around with Raab and Bam who were teasing me about my clothing choices. That kind of serenity doesn't last very long when you live in a home with Ape and Bam both together.

"Bam!" April yelled from outside.

"What?" Bam yelled back.

"What happened to the mailbox?" She asked.

"Oh for fuck's sake. Dunn broke it, he just handles everything rough." Bam said.

I laughed softly to myself. Little things in my daily life just like this made me think of the future. Think of how this is where I belonged in life. How April should be my mother in law, Bam should be my husband, and my last name should be Margera. How all these people should be in my life forever.

Bam and I walked to the door to talk to Ape.

"Like... We'll never be able to get mail." April said.

"Well, luckily tomorrow's saturday. So we don't get mail." Bam reassured her.

"We get mail on saturday," Ape laughed, and so did I.

"Do we?" Bam looked at me.

"Yes," I laughed.

"I didn't know that," Bam laughed too.

So to fix the problem of getting mail on saturday, Glomb arranged for a cement truck to secure the death trap. Of course, Bam was Bam and overspilled it. Then, Bam's brain went into overdrive and he came up with the idea of turning the huge snakerun driveway into a skatepark. Being a skater I thought it was a cool idea, but I refused to help with any type of physical labor.

Then the idea really went all haywire and shit, and we all had to go to cali to get celebrity flare for the driveway while Glomb stayed and built it. After it was all done, some of mine and Bam's pro skating buds were gonna fly out to give it a proper grand opening.

We drove to the airport, and one of us had to ride with Ape, Phil and Vito, so I voulenteered, not really wanting to be in a car with Jenn. Bam looked a little bummed but stayed enthusiastic about the trip. I, for one, was super happy that I'd get to ride in the car with Vito.

"So where are we going, Ollie? To California?" She asked, not sure on where we were going since Bam just demanded they follow him to the airport. Thats what normally went on.

"Yeah," I replied, also texing back Dunn who sent me a text. He got separation anxiety even though we were ten minutes down the road.

"For what?" She asked.

"He wantsta get mememorbilia for suttin." Vito replied for me.

"What's that for, are you stuttering?" Ape asked, referring to the extra 'me' on memorbilia.

"No, s'nat stuttering. Its mememorbilia. Howduh you say it?" Vito asked.

"Memorbilia." Ape told him.

Vito then tried to say it, but ended up stuttering again.

At the airport, Dunn ambushed me with a hug. He hated it when I rode in a different car, because we roadside buddies. We loved road trips and always made it way more fun. So, to make up for it, I sat next to him on the plane.

Upon arriving in California, I was allowed to make some decisons since we were on my turf. I reccomended we eat at a place called Grub, one of my favorite resturaunts in the Hollywood area. I rarely go to Hollywood, but I know where the good places to eat are.

Once we got seated, we started talking about how to get what Bam wanted for the Driveway.

"Raab, why don't you get a map of the stars so we can get some souvenires for this shit." Bam said.

"So what, are we supposed to just try to get as much stuff as we can?" Ape asked.

"No ape, just get one thing and be happy! Stop trying to be greedy all the time and get the most. Everytime ya do that eggway change all the rules." Vito butted in.

I rolled my eyes. He was so retarded sometimes. I just got infected with his stupidity sometimes.

"Well then what are you gonna do?" Ape asked.

"Wigga govinda Playboy Mansion!" Vito announced that he'd be going to the playboy mansion.

Bam and I shared amused glances. "No way." Bam said, shaking his head with a smile.

"Yeah, just knock on the gates and they'll let you in." I told Vito sarcastically.

"I gouda supscription to him." Vito defended himself, and in his logic, a 20+ year subsription to Playboy should be enough to get him into the mansion.

"It isn't a tourist attraction, Vito, only VIP's get in there." Bam said.

"It's there hupme I goata there!" Vito had had enough and threw his arms up in the air, and he stood from his chair. "Move monomona! They let you in, they'll let me in ogwanapate!"

Phil tried to talk him down,

"I don't care, I just wanda getouddahere cumon!" Vito didn't even let Phil continue. He started to leave, smacked a laughing Ryan in the back of his head, and continued yelling unintellageable things out of rage, such as, "Goren flaxovich!"

And he left the resturaunt.

"He's not getting in," Bam laughed. "Rake, Raab, go follow the fatboy, make sure he doesn't get arrested. Jenn!"

"What?" She asked, slightly irritated.

"Go with Phil and Ape and make sure they don't get anything stupid." Bam demanded.

"Hey! We're gonna get the best memorbilia ever!" Ape argued back with a smirk.

"Whatever, Ape. Jenn, just help me out on this one." He emotionlessly kissed her cheek.

She, however, didn't see the emotionlessness behind it and gave me an evil smile and glare. But like I said before, Bam knew exactly what to do, and he was doing it.

"No problem, Baby." She gave him a flirty smile.

I rolled my eyes and gagged silently behind her back, making Dunn chuckle.

"Alright, I'm on the hunt for celebrity flare too, and these two are coming with me." Bam pointed to Dunn and me.

Jenn gave me a death glare again.

"Be careful, baby." She told Bam, obviously talking about being careful around me. Even Bam rolled his eyes at that one and shot me an apologetic look.

I smiled and shrugged it off, pleased with the day's happenings, and getting to spend time with just Bam and Dunn.

We all caught up with Vito outside, who Raab and Rake were trying to convince to let them go with him.

"Vito, you aren't gonna get into the playboy mansion." Bam said, which started Vito up again.

"Bam, its the main reason you come to california, to go to the playboy manison. There's nuthin else out here except vegan people." Vito lifted his arms into the air while explaining, much like jesus would.

We all laughed at him.

"I'm gonna just gundahate Hugh Hefner, thassall." He threw his arms up again and turned to leave.

"Vito, you don't know where you're going!" Rake yelled after him.

Rake and Raab went off on their quest to keep Vito out of jail, and the rest of the groups went our seperate ways.

After an hour, I think, on the other side of the street we spotted Dave Ghrol from the Foo Fighters, who gave us his belt. Bam called Glomb for a status report who had nothing but complaints, mostly about Dico, who was left behind to help. Ryan got on the phone to scold him but Glomb just hung up.

We continued around Hollywood, and Glomb called again, and Bam and He decided to just cement over Vito's car, which was parked in the way. That would make for a sweet jump, I thought.

Somehow we managed to get to Tommy Lee's place, and he gave us a motherfucking signed snare drum and drumsticks. He kissed my hand which made me giggle like an idiot and blush like hell.

So that counted three peices of memorbilia from two of my most favorite musicians.

Then, we decided we needed more people.

It was time to recruit Comptan Ass Terry.


So I decided to split Driveway Skatepark into two different chapters. I know its short but I liked this chapter name and came up with a cool one for next chapter, so I decided to anyways. Its summer vacation and my computer is officially up and running again, so I've got more chapters coming. I also need to get working on This Is Atomic Love. I have half a new chapter written and haven't touched it in forever. I miss writing about Nudie. So you can expect some Atomic Love, and maybe some Steve-O and Hayley. I've been having writers block with love will tear us apart though. But I'm sure you'll get some of that soon too.

Until next chapter :)