New chapter. Have fun.
Disclaimer: see Prologue
Title: Christina Aguilera - Mercy on me
Chapter Six: Well the more that I start to play...
Martin, 31. Just wants to talk.
Daniel, 42. Likes to have his arse spanked.
Jeffrey, 64. All the way through. Scream his name. Won't stop until you come.
Gregory, 50. Father of two. Bored by his wife. Likes to try out all kinds of stuff. Call someone to wait at the door. Just in case.
Patrick, 21. Young pervert. Likes to give facials, pearl necklaces. Likes to slap me. Think he might not even like proper sex.
Richard, doesn't want to give his age. Keep ice close in case of swelling.
Sir Steven, 35. Into BDSM. Sir Steven likes to tie people up and then use them. Very respectful, but firm.
Two months into the job and Jim already felt like nobody could teach him anything anymore. During these two months he had heard of all possible and impossible sex practices. From all sorts of men. Men liked him because he looked vulnerable. And because he looked so vulnerable he generally attracted the more dominant men. Vicious circle. But Jim stood out between the rest of the rent boys: many of them were older and more muscular. So Jim soon had his regulars.
It sounded like business transactions. That was the way Jim wanted it to sound. Like Gloria had said, only a job. It wasn't the job he always dreamt of, but hell, he earned so much money, it was ridiculous. So what if he was essentially losing all of his dignity? Dignity wasn't that important now. He wasn't somebody who could afford dignity. At least he could afford food now. And clothes. Real clothes. Warm clothes. It had started snowing outside. It was close to Christmas; the city smelled of cinnamon and pines.
Even Gloria had managed to get the other guys to decorate their rooms and the hall, "Christmas is a bad time for us. All the clients spend it with their families, pretending that they love their wives and children and would never even think of visiting us. But I think we could use a bit of Christmas-spirit here."
Jim however expected at least Patrick to come over. He had no family in the city and didn't go home for the holidays, and he had already told Jim he would stop by. Patrick was the one Jim liked the least. After all those years he had lived with Marlon Brook, Jim knew how to tell apart the people that wanted sex from the people that only wanted to humiliate others, and Patrick definitely fell into the latter category. So far he hadn't even tried to have sex with Jim; he only wanted to mark Jim as his. And talk about his fantasies of doing this to a woman. Mark a woman as his, control her everything. Why he never visited female prostitutes was something Jim didn't understand.
But Gloria, who visited Jim every night to bring him tea or cookies, seemed to know it, "It sounds cliché, but I think he might be afraid of women. Many men come to see us because women won't give them the time of the day, and they think that if they can have power over men, having power over women will only be a matter of time."
Jim has been wondering about Gloria's story long enough, so, this time, he asked, "Why are you here?"
"Making small talk, now?" She smiled. "I came here because my parents didn't understand that I like cross-dressing. My dad beat the shit out of me when I was your age and he saw me in my sister's mini-skirt and her top. And many times after it. They never understood that it's a completely normal thing. And then I got married, to an absolutely lovely woman. I still am, actually. Only… well, once she discovered that I preferred her LBD to my tux… she was very understanding, but couldn't find me attractive anymore, so we broke up. She was gorgeous, and I really loved her, but, of course, I understood her problem."
"So you're still friends?"
"Yes, indeed. She doesn't like what I'm doing, but… It's hard to get a job for people like me."
"Do you actually want to be a woman?" Jim was interested, now. He couldn't quite understand the woman before him. "I mean… you dress like one, you call yourself Gloria…"
She smiled, "I am quite happy as a man as it is. Because I am a man, and I am one hell of a man. Most of my clients, I could snap their neck in two. I just happen to like to dress up in women's clothes. Have you ever tried it?" Jim shook his head. "You should. It's very sensual."
"I don't know… I think I might stick to trousers. Wouldn't want to make it even easier for the clients by wearing a skirt."
Gloria laughed, "Very true. But it adds a certain… feeling to the thing if you think that the only thing separating you and your sexual partner from engaging in sex is just a little piece of fabric… Of course, it'll only arouse you if you actually like the other one…"
Jim remembered Sorcha. He only had seen her wearing anything else but a skirt the day they went to see the Ireland game. That night they had had sex, she had been wearing a skirt. And yes, come to think about, Jim had liked it.
"Why are you blushing now?" Gloria seemed amused. "Thinking of something?"
"Yeah... my first time. She liked skirts."
"The girl that was in love with you?"
"Yeah. She made a move on me one night, and, well… it sort of happened."
"Was it good?"
"Hell, yeah." He blurted out. "I mean… we were both inexperienced. But at least it was…"
"Consensual?"
"Yeah. And I didn't feel like I was just used." He shook his head, "Well, no use thinking about it. It's not like anybody would want damaged goods."
"Does she know what you're doing now?"
"I… I called her… after my first client… and told her what I had just done."
"How did she react?"
"She told me she still loves me. But she's silly."
"So you think because you're doing this you don't deserve somebody's love?"
"I just can't imagine somebody would be attracted to me if they knew what I have already done for money. What I had people do to me." Jim shrugged.
"You'd better stop that self-pity, because that is truly disgusting. Try and see what she probably sees. She knew you before all of this." Gloria got up. "I need to leave now. It's getting dark, and I have a client coming." Her eyes rested on Jim, "Don't hate yourself for what you do. You deserve love just like anyone of us. And this girl… what's her name, anyways?"
"Sorcha…"
Gloria smiled, "I wish you could hear yourself pronouncing her name. Like a caress. Anyways. She might be the one soul you need to feel better again. You cannot live hating yourself. Why don't you invite her for Christmas?"
"Christmas? She'll spend it with her family."
"Then New Year's. Night, darling."
Jim thought about it the whole evening. Even during his hour with Patrick, there was nothing else on his mind.
When Patrick had left and Jim had cleaned himself up, he had made his decision, and walked to the nearest phone booth.
"Moran?"
"It's me."
"Jim." Like a caress… "Come home."
"Sorcha… I can't. I have a job. I… I actually… I might be a bit sentimental right now… Would you like to come to Dublin? Visit me? For Christmas?"
"Sure."
"Don't you want to ask your parents?"
"You killed two people and you want me to get my parents' permission to visit you? But yeah, I'll ask them."
"And if they say 'no', you'll come anyways."
"Yes. I am a gangster."
He couldn't help but smile, "And you're not afraid?"
"You had the chance to off me. More than once. I… I just want to see you again. Feel you again. Smell you… Oh gosh, I'm being tacky. I'll be there on the 24th. Don't run."
"Where would I run to?"
Bit of fluff. I can't help it.
