Jordan's first driving lesson.
Hello everyone once again! I did come up with the idea for this chapter on my own but I needed a little more help where creativity was concerned so I got my friend Baileigh (or crunchs girl1254) to co-write it. I think that this might be in the same league as Kai's sugar high. Though that's just a prediction. Now onward!
Disclaimer; I do not own beyblade as much as I would like to, hey do you see the certificate saying I do? And Baileigh does not own Harry potter as much as she worships Ron and Cedric Diggory. She's ploting to kill J.K Rowling as we speak lol! Jk!
Everyone was watching loony tunes in the living room.
"Shh! Be verwy quiet! I'm huntin for rascalwy wabbits!" Elmer fud whispered.
"Eh what's up doc?" bugs bunny asks. POW POW POW! Elmer shot bugs.
"Oh my god that's painful!" POW POW! "AHHH!" Elmer walks over and cracks bug's neck and drags him away.
"Wow (laughs) bugs bunny finally got what he deserved!" Tyson laughs.
Hilary was bawling "That was the most disturbing thing I've ever seen!" the doorbell rings.
"I'll go see if she's here yet." Kenny says as he walks away.
"See if who's here?" Jordan asks. There was an eerie silence. Jordan sensed a guilty air around her friends.
"She's here!" Kenny is heard. He walks into the room followed by a girl around 17 years of age with blood red curly hair and piercing green eyes.
"Who're you and why are you here?" Jordan asked.
"I'm Steffi and I'm here in response to this add." Steffi says holding up a newspaper clipping. (AN; Steffi is baileigh's favourite oc.)
'Wanted, experienced driving teacher, must be very calm and ready to face death. There have been around 25 casualties, I don't know I lost count at 15, and the five instructors that came haven't even been inside the car before they landed in the hospital. If successful will be paid $200 must also be able to handle extreme stupidity. Please hurry and contact this number 665-2910 ask for Ray.'
"WHAT? I didn't-" Jordan began.
"Yeah you did!" Max interrupts.
FLASHBACK
Jordan let off a smoke bomb. When it cleared she was the only one gone. Ray was almost at the car. Kai was hot on his heels. They were sitting in the car. Jordan in the drivers, Ray in the front passengers and Kai in the back.
"How the hell do you start this damn thing!" Jordan yells frustrated.
"With the damn keys!" Ray yells back. He gives her the keys. She looked around for a few seconds.
"Where the hell do they go?"
"All this yelling is scaring me…" Kai hides in the back. Ray is starting to get really mad. He takes the keys and sticks them into the ignition.
Jordan looks at Ray "Now what?" Ray is silently fuming.
'If god had mercy he'd smite me where I'm sitting.' Ray thought while turning the key. Jordan pushed down a stick by the wheel and pressed the gas. It went zooming backwards into the Mc Donald's window. Ronald Mc Donald's head hits the windshield.
"AHHHH!" they all screamed. Kai sounded like a 5 year old girl.
"I wonder what happens when it's on D?" Jordan switches it and it moves very slowly. "Screw this!" she floors it right through the rabid fangirls crowded around Tyson, Kenny and Max. only like 2 or 3 were not injured. Most got thrown over the hood, she scraped some and ran over a few. Tyson hit the windshield.
"AHHHHHH!" they all screamed again. Kenny Max and Tyson were staring in shock.
Jordan lays on the horn "Get in all ready! I have to pee!"
"I think I don't have to go anymore." Kai mumbles. On the way home.
"It's a red light! STOP!" Tyson yells.
"Some colourful lights can bite me." Jordan answers. 5 minutes later…
"Do you have a license?" Ray asks worried.
"No." Jordan answers shamelessly.
"That explains things-watch out for that semmy!" Tyson yells.
"AHHHH!"
END FLASHBACK
Tyson looks up from his pizza. "Ouh a red head!" Tyson runs up. "Hey have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears?" he pulls out both of his front pants pockets and makes bunny ears. Steffi canned him and Hilary smacked him upside the head.
"Sorry I'm taken." Steffi said stiffly.
"BY WHO!" Tyson yells. Ron weasly walks in.
"Hello…remember me?" Ron says evilly.
"Hey you're that evil red head!" Tyson says.
Hilary being smart broke up a potential fight by asking "I like your hair! How is it so red?"
"My father is a mass murderer who escaped from prison, I soaked my hair in the blood of his victims." Steffi joked but it sounded serious.
'I think I'm gonna like this girl.' Jordan thought. She had a hockey jersey on and had a hockey stick on the ready to smack someone.
"BACK AWAY FROM THE PSYCHO GIRL! BACKAWAY NOW!" Max yells.
Ron pushes Tyson away. "YEAH THAT'S RIGHT! BACK AWAY FROM MY STEFFI!"
"Ok…which one of you am I supposed to teach how to drive?" Steffi asked. Jordan waves her hockey stick in the air. "Good, now lets go outside." They do, there is a van outside. "Ok, I got these tests from my aunts, Patti and Selma. I need you to do them for me."
"Ok." Jordan says. She begins doing them, around half way… "AH it's a brain fart!" she's menacingly waving her hockey stick.
"Huh?" Kai asks.
"Knowledge overload…brain being squeezed! Must rest!" Jordan says.
"Nice try. Finish it off." Steffi says in a cold voice. Jordan pouts as she finishes it.
"What the hell do these have to do with anything?" Jordan asks.
"I was hoping you'd learn some new things and seeing what you do know which is very little." Steffi says as she flips though them. "Haven't you ever watched anyone drive a car?" Jordan shakes her head. "Well I've fought vines, giant spiders and dementors! I'm ready for your crazy driving."
"Well lets do the practical course on the way to the driver's ed course." Ron says. The nine of them get into the van, Jordan in the driver's seat, Steffi in the passenger's seat and Kenny in between them, Ray Kai and Ron in the second row and Tyson, Max and Hilary in the back.
"I'm assuming you know how to start it?" Steffi asks.
"She does." Ray sighs. Kai smirks. Jordan sticks the keys into the ignition and turns them. She then turns the gear shift so it's on R. it starts going backwards. She turns the wheel so she's in the other neighbours yard.
"Shit!" Jordan gets it back on the driveway and gets it on the street. While driving…
"Ok your reverse wasn't too bad. Still needs work- STOP! THERE'S A RED LIGHT AND PEOPLE ARE IN THE STREET!" Steffi yells.
"Nah those are signs, look one says 'Got milk?'" Jordan answers.
"IN THE MIDDLE OF A CROSSWALK! WAKE UP WOMAN!" Kenny yells.
"I guess you got me there…" Jordan brakes suddenly. "Move it or lose it!" she yells out the window. They wait for the light to turn green.
"How much longer?" Hilary asks. Tyson's stomach rumbles.
"yeah I'm hungry." He adds.
"How about Mc Donalds?" Ron asks.
"We got banned from there it's a long story that I'm still trying to forget." Kai says Glaring at the driver's seat.
"How about wendy's? and why am I driving around? Where are we going?" Jordan asks.
"We're supposed to go to my aunt's driving course but we'll go after wendy's." steffi explains. The light turns green and Jordan floors it.
"Jordan see that sign?" Ray asks.
"Yeah." She answers carelessly.
"THAT MEANS GO 110 km/h NOT 1200 km!" Ray yells in her ear.
"Oh…" she puts on the hand brake and presses the foot brake at the same time. The car stops suddenly and Hilary goes flying to the front. Jordan presses the gas trying to keep it in the speed on the signs.
"Jesus Jordan! Are you trying to kill us all!" Hilary shrieks. She's half in the front and half in the back.
"You could say that…" Jordan answers. She turns and is trying to pass this truck but it keeps cutting her off so in retaliation she begins to tail-gate him. She tries passing again and floors it and while passing she honks the horn and fingers the guy. "eat my dust!" she passes him.
At wendys…
"Isn't this the place where that seriously mental lady claimed there was a finger in her chilli but it was all a hoax?" Max asks.
"Not at this exact place but it's the same restaurant chain." Kenny answers.
"Tyson wouldn't care; he'd eat it and never know." Hilary comments.
"But that bitch was lying! She was a lazy person trying to make a few bucks!" Jordan yells causing everyone in the restaurant to look at them.
"Uh I'll go order…Ron wanna come with?" Ray asks.
"sure."
After ordering…
Kai starts choking, Jordan being the only one having experience in first aid began the Heimlich manoeuvre. He coughs up a…
"Nose! It's a nose!" Max informs.
"No it's a clown nose." Ron says.
"Ronald Mc Donald's getting his revenge on you Kai!" Tyson jokes.
"Shut up tyson." Kai retorts.
After eating they're in the car
"Ok this is where my aunties' driving course is." Steffi says giving Jordan a map.
"For god sakes! It's on the other side of town!" Jordan says she starts the car.
"I'm too young and hot to die." Max comments. Everyone looks at him.
"What? I have freedom of speech!" max defends his rights. Jordan begins to drive.
Later on…
"Where do I recognise that truck from somewhere?" Kenny talks to himself. The said truck is right beside them.
"Cause that's the truck Jordan fingered and wouldn't let her pass." Kai said in monotone.
"Maybe he won't notice us." Hilary says. Jordan speeds up. She holds the steering wheel with one knee and holds the map to hr face.
"Oh good I turn left at the next exit." The car is swerving all over the lane.
"SET THE FICKING MAP DOWN, WATCH THE ROAD AND KEEP YOUR HANDS ON THE WHEEL!" Steffi yells.
'Everyone hates a talented person using some creativity.' Jordan thought as she did what she was told.
'One day her imagination's gonna get her killed.' Hilary thought.
"LOOK OUT!" Ray, Kenny and Tyson yell. THUD! Jessica simpson goes flying.
"Well that's one thing taken care of." Jordan pulls out a 'things to do list before I die.' List and crosses off 'hit Jessica S. with my car.'
"NO! why did you take her life! She was soo hot!" Tyson yelled earning himself a smack from Hilary. 5 min later…
"I hate eerie silences." Max says turning on the radio a song comes up 'Fuck wid me I'll bust a cap in your ass-' steffi turns it off.
"Live with it."
"Ok we're almost there." Ron says looking at the map. "Turn right…good you remembered to signal this time. Do I have to get out and be with aunt patti and Selma?"
"Yes." Steffi sighed.
"DOE!"
"Man what a shit heap." Tyson comments pointing to a rundown building next to a couple driving courses.
"That's where we're going." Steffi says. Jordan turn into the gate. She has a look of pure horror on her face.
"ohshitiforgothowtobrake!" she says really fast.
"What?" everyone asks.
"Oh shit I forgot how to brake!" she says a little slower. They were in collision course with the building.
"The brake pedal!" Kenny yells.
"Huh?" Jordan asks.
"LET GO OF THE GAS AND PRESS THE BRAKE!" Kenny yells.
"But which one is the goddamn brake! There's three of them!" Jordan asks.
"the one that you don't have your foot on and isn't the small one that says hood!" Kai answered.
"Oh." Jordan starts repeatedly pressing the brake pedal so the van is jerking back and forth.
"Hold the pedal!" Ron gasps exasperatedly. Some idiot walked into the van's path. SMACK!
"That was my brother Percy you maniac!" Ron yells. The van is still going.
(Baileigh; yay! He got hit! SS 101; well you got your wish)
"……………………..oops I wonder who I'll hit next?" Jordan jokes. A black dog walks into the van's path. SMACK!
"That was my father you psycho!" steffi yells. The dog was now a human. Surprisingly an orange cat and a tabby cat were watching all of this and they felt left out so they walked into the van's path. THUD!
"Hey that was Hermione's cat! Good job!" Ron complements.
"RON! OH MY FUCKING GOD! YOU HIT PROFESSOR MCGONAGAL!" Steffi yells.
"Yay no homework!" Ron celebrates.
"RON!" Steffi yelled again. 'why am I with him again?' a hobo is in their path.
"ok this is beyond weird." Ray comments. They stop a few millimetres from the hobo. A cop magically appears.
"That's against the law you're coming with me." He says.
"ah ah ah can't touch me!" Jordan yells as she drives away. "You'll never take me alive!" she drives around back. "Help! He's gonna get me!" they run into the building. They meet aunt patti and Selma, (think of the simpsons.)
they're all in the building watching the news.
"Former mass murderer Sirius Black……has died in a hit and run crash."
"I'm an orphan!" steffi screams.
Remus lupin pops in "I'm a legal guardian!"
Lupin's daughter Maria pops in "I'm a legal guardian's daughter!" Sirius walks in.
"WE'RE SAVED!" Remus and Maria yell.
"Huh? Who the hell are you guys? All I remember is being hit by some lunatic driving my van!" he says oddly slurred.
Steffi runs over. "snap out of it dad!" she slaps him.
"Uh when am I gonna drive?" Jordan asks.
Sirius snaps out of it "You're the lunatic that hit me!"
Jordan nods "yep sorry about that."
"that's ok but there's something I have a bone to pick with him, you (points at Tyson) never flirt with my daughter again or I'll pull out my machete." Sirius black says.
(Baileigh falls over laughing SS 101; Baileigh breathe it's not that funny! Baileigh gasps for air it is! I think I'm gonna die! Audience looks at them weirdly ss 101 notices ss 101; this is an insiders joke, my dad said that if I ever brought a guy home with out telling him he'd be waiting on the deck with his machete waiting for the right moment to strike. And if you knew my dad you'd laugh too he was serious too and the funny thing was is that his radio was on so all his co-workers in the patch heard.)
"yes I won't! please don't murder me mr. mass murderer sir!" Tyson grovels.
"C'mon let's get out of here." Aunt Selma whispers to Jordan. They begin to leave.
"Oh aunt Selma! I hope you've got a carton of cigs on you and Jordan good luck…you're gonna need it!" steffi says.
In the car…
"Ok I need you to drive through those pylons." Selma says.
"Ok." Jordan starts the car, she begins to drive and goes out of her way to hit all the pylons, the others were watching this.
"How many minutes do you think she'll have her license before she loses it? My bet is 8." Dizzi says.
In the car…
"I said drive through the course not run over the pylons." Selma said.
"Whoops I'll re-try that." Jordan apologises. They redo the course which Jordan succeeded. Steffi had handed in the test but Jordan now had to take them over to figure out all the new things she had learned.
"Finally I'm done." Jordan yells waving her hockey stick narrowly missing Tyson. They began marking the tests.
5 min later…
"Congrats you just passed here's your licence." Steffi informs.
"Thanks!" Jordan takes it and Ray pays them. "Bye!" everyone says to eachother.
On the ride home…
"Hey your driving's improved!" Hilary complements.
"Yeah what's up with that?" Max asks.
"I've finally found something worth having and I don't want to lose it anytime soon." Jordan explains. They get home preparing for the next crazy day.
That ends this chappie! Please read and review! Tell us what you think! If you have any ideas please share! I'll probably use them! Well it's 11:30 at night so g2g!
