Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Note: Hey ya'll! Long time no see! Remember me? I'm the one who takes long hiatuses on this story because I have no ideas anymore... but you guys still seem to like the story so i guess we'll see how this plays out! Sorry about the hiatus! What with Honors English reading (who gives summer homework... seriously?), my Death Note letters thingy and my Naruto story, things have been a little crazy...

So without further delay I bring you... Fullmetal's trip to Mesa Verde, Colorado thanks to strongandsilentalchemist (my "official" friend)


"How the hell did we end up here anyways?" Ed asked in an annoyed tone.

Roy smirked, shaking his head. "What do you have short term memory loss, Fullmetal?" he asked.

Alphonse hung on to Ed's shirt as he tried to punch the colonel as he yelled, "Short! I'm not short!"

Alphonse shook his head, muttering, "That's not what he said, Ed."

EARLIER…

"All of you pack your things. We have a mission," Roy ordered, walking into the office. The men looked at him skeptically before shrugging and returning to their paperwork. They did not even ask where it was that he was taking them anymore. It had just become the norm.

"Where are we going, Colonel?" Hawkeye asked.

Roy sighed, sitting back in his chair and propping his feet on his desk. "The Fuhrer is having us go to a place called Mesa Verde to find something or other."

"Sounds boring," Edward commented.

"And he also said there may be a clue as to how the Elrics can get their bodies back," he added, and Ed stood up, heading toward the door.

"Let's go pack, Al," he said, completely forgetting his earlier comment.

Roy shook his head as the boys left. "So predictable."

PRESENT TIME…

"What the hell are we going to find in a bunch of caves?" Edward asked staring up at the caverns carved into the rock. It didn't seem like that big a deal to him. The only thing keeping him here was the hope that they may find something to return their bodies to normal.

The military officers began hoisting themselves onto wooden ladders leading into the cave like structures without as much as a comment to Ed.

Mustang looked at Edward who in turn sneered at him. "Careful Fullmetal. I'm not sure that you're tall enough to reach each rung of the ladder."

Edward's face turned bright red, and Alphonse had to again hold on to his coat to keep him from climbing the ladder and making the officer's fall.

"Brother, don't. You'd hurt the other officers and they didn't do anything," he said, not wanting his brother to cause the ladder to collapse. In truth, Colonel Mustang probably deserved it, but the other officers did not, especially not Hawkeye who was completely innocent.

"Sir, stop provoking him," Hawkeye said as she continued up the ladder above Mustang.

"It's so hard to stop. He makes it so easy," Roy complained, then added, "Are you afraid he might break the ladder? Don't worry, Lieutenant. I'll catch you if you fall."

At that moment, Riza moved sharply, causing the ladder to wobble. Roy lost his balance for a split second and had to grab onto the ladder for dear life. Hawkeye continued up the ladder without a word, distancing herself from the Colonel.

"Morally bankrupt," Edward muttered, and Roy was tempted to kick the little bean off the ladder.

OOO...

"I see nothing except abandoned dwellings," Edward said, walking around the kivas situated in the middle.

"Thanks for stating the obvious, Fullmetal," Havoc mumbled, earning a death glare from Ed.

Edward turned away, trying to contain his anger. What was it, pick on Fullmetal day? "I just want to know what is so great about this place," he mumbled, trying to distance himself from the other officers. He didn't appreciate being constantly chastised.

"Wow, look at these, brother," Al said, pointing into the large kivas. "What are they?"

"They're kivas. Many believed they were used for religious ceremonies. They are very popular in old Indian architecture and…" Falman began only to be silenced by his fellow officers.

"We don't need the complete rundown, Officer Falman," Hawkeye said, and Falman grew quiet.

"Wow, it's so dark. I wonder what's inside," Edward said, peering cautiously down the small opening.

"Why don't you go look," Roy said, pushing him slightly on the back. Edward, who lost his balance from the push, fell headfirst into the kiva, landing with a loud thud and a moan. Roy and the other men suppressed their laughter as Edward recovered from his tumble. Then, because Roy was in the pick on Fullmetal mood, he grabbed ahold of the ladder, pulling it from the deep kiva and setting it aside, trapping Edward in the kiva for the moment.

"Too bad he's not tall enough to…" Roy began only to feel the familiar, wet sensation of water being thrown on him. He shook the water from his hair, looking to see who the culprit was. Hawkeye stood behind him, her hands slightly wet. "What the hell was that for?"

"It seems to work with Hayate when I throw water on him when he's bad. I thought it might work for you. You are called a dog of the military after all. And besides, you don't like getting wet," she deadpanned, and Roy became quiet.

"Cheer up, Sir. So what if you're useless when wet," Havoc said, patting his superior's back. At that instant, Havoc pushed him a bit too hard, intentionally of course, into the kiva's opening. Roy fell to join Fullmetal who was all too eager to fight.

"Agh! Fullmetal, stop now!" Roy's cries could be heard by the other officers who laughed in response.

OOO…

"Thanks a lot, Havoc," Roy said after he managed to get out of the kiva. His hair was tousled, not in the way it normally was, and his clothing was slightly brown from the dirt. Fullmetal looked no different as he walked beside Al who was keeping a close eye on him to prevent trouble.

"So Colonel, where's this thing that's going to get our bodies back?" Edward called behind him to Roy.

Roy pointed ahead toward a small tunnel. "Why don't you try in there?"

Edward shrugged, turning toward the tunnel. Its height was very small, the top of it grazing Edward's head. He looked back to notice no one following him. How could they? He was the only one who could fit.

"Well, it's a good thing I'm so small or this would be practically impossible," he mumbled to himself only to explode with anger at himself. "NO IT'S NOT!" he screamed, throwing a fit inside the small tunnel.

"Ah, Brother," Alphonse began as rocks began to fall from the ceiling. Soon, the entrance to the tunnel was completely closed off, trapping Edward in the tunnel and the rest of the military officials and Al on the other side.

Roy looked at the tunnel before turning back the way they had come. "Well that's unfortunate," he said.

"He was a fine state alchemist," Havoc added, following Mustang close behind.

The rest nodded in agreement as they left Edward and Alphonse trying to use their alchemy to free Edward.

OOO…

"Mustang, I thought Fullmetal had gone with your team," the Fuhrer said as Mustang handed in his report.

"Yes, Sir, but he decided they would stay a bit longer," Roy said, leaving the office.

OOO…

As Edward and Alphonse rode the train back to Central, Edward fumed to Alphonse about the morally bankrupt Colonel with a god complex who thought it a good idea to leave him behind.


~AN~

Ok so a few things:

1) thanks to strongandsilentalchemist for ideas and pictures! It helped a lot

2) I've never been here so probably half of what I said made no sense whatsoever... but try to live with it.

3) imagine cave dwellings carved into the side of a mountain with giant holes in them called kivas that you can go into...

4) I love making fun of Edward... and having Roy get wet and useless... it just makes my day. I think Riza should have a spray bottle so she can spray him with water when he's bad...

Lastly, thanks to anyone who's still reading! I don't promise when the next chapter will be up. It all depends on if I get ideas I can work with or not! Thank you!