Chapter Seven: Confession

Parking in the short driveway, Renesmee's eyes spotted Jacob. Had he known she was coming? Was he getting tired of her?

Searching for her jacket, the hybrid finally turned to see Jacob opening her door. Smiling she mouthed 'hi' to him. Placing his hands under her arms, he lifted her out of the tall veihcal and pressed his lips to her cheek before setting her on the ground. Her face turned bright red.

Looking at the house, she caught a glimse of Alice, her aunt. The vampire's eyes were focused on the two opposites. Could she tell? Did she know something?

Then, quickly the vampire hurried inside.

"What was that about?" her soft voice whispered.

"Huh? What?" Jacob asked, turning in the direction the hybrid's eyes where pointed too.

"Oh, nothing. Let's go."

Hiding things from Jacob was not something the young half-breed did often, but this was something she wanted to work out first without putting anymore of her problems on his shoulders.

Calling from the door, Emily Young, was holding a huge box of what looked like bunches of ribbions and bows on top of her large stomache, "Jacob, come on kid. Your killing me."

"Yeah, yeah hush fatso."

"I'm not fat. I'm pregant."

Walking over to Emily, her belly intreaged Renesmee. Werewolf's reproduced. Was it safe? 'Was it safe for us?'

"About that, how many of those little devils are you going to pop out? Don't you think the three are enough now?" Jacob laughed at his own joke as his imprint hit him on the shoulder and grabbed the box Emily had been resting on her belly.

Then, Jacob shot Renesmee a look. Knowing why, she remembered something that had been long forgotten-

Laughing, Jacob and Renesmee watched a remake of Shakespear's Romeo and Juliet. The one with the attractive male lead in it.

"This is so corny," Renesmee blurted out, "seriously I want to throw up."

"Oh, come on. Your a girl, your into this crap right?" Jacob assumed.

"Hell no!"

"Why?"

"It's all bullshit."

"Watch your mouth, kid! And doesn't every girl want an annoying little quick marragie, happy ending stuff."

"Umm, not this one," Renesmee had said in her childish tone, "wanna know what I want?"

"Yes."

"I want to rely on no one. Be completely independent. Well expect for my best friend. I'll always welcome you into my hell whole."

"Kids?"

"Are brats. Have you met me?"

"Marragie?"

"Is a piece of paper."

"Love?"

"Is a sign of weekness and insecurity."

Jacob's eyes focused back on the movie, watching the meaningless moving screen out of bordem.

"Acctually, I want a family of sixteen" Emily's voice pulled her back to reality.

In all truth, she had meant what she had said when she was ten. That was the person Renesmee wanted to be. But, things changed. Now, she wanted Jacob. Her heart screamed his name. No matter if she'll ever admitt it. And whatever he wanted, she'd give him. Marragie? If he asked. Kids? If he wanted. Everthing, she'd give him everything.

'Your kidding, right? We are hardly anything other than bestfriends who kiss eachother. One is addicted, and deeply in love. And the other is imprinted and devoted to the other. That is all. Not even a relationship has been established. Get over yourself, Ness.'

Pulling her back from her thoughts, was Jacob's voice, "Good luck with that."

Entering the door, Jacob placed his hands on her arms as he stood behind her and guided her to the table where she layed the box down. Turning her around, he kissed her hairline, then her temple. Giggling, Renesmee lightly tapped his chest. Trying to remind him that even though no one was in the room, they could hear every little detail.

"Like I care," he mumbled kissing her lips once.

"Come on, what would you say?"

"Does it matter," he kissed her lips again.

Almost forgetting her point in the arguement, her addition was teasing her like the smell of smoke to a quiter.

"Would it be something like, oh I don't know," Renesmee paused as his lips met hers, "I sometimes kiss my bestfriend, no big idea. She's only five years younger than me."

Pulling back, his expression had 'hurt' written all over. 'Wrong word choice, dumbass.'

"I thought it didn't bother you."

"It doesn't."

"What is it then-"

Right then, Alice fluttered through the room, glancing. Letting go, Renesmee slammed herself against the counter. Trying to look as though Jacob had not layed a finger on her.

"Oh that's it," he caught on.

"What?"

"Her, your pretending again kid. Trying to hide me-"

"That's not it-"

"Then what!"

Honestly, that was it. Why was he reacting this way anyway?

"She-she won't understand. I just don't want to throw it out there."

"Your lying, I can tell. You know, I understand the acts around everyone else-but me Ness. Really? You think I don't know you well-"

"Jacob, that's not it-"

"Your pretending! Just like you pretend not to need anyone. News flash, kid your helpless."

"Don't call me that!"

"What? Kid? Why not? That's what you are. Why are you trying to grow up so fast?"

"Don't talk to me like that. What the hell's gotten into you?"

"Don't you dare try and put this on me! I'm not the one hiding from everyone. Don't pretend with me. You said you weren't pretending last night, but that's all you do. Don't sit here and hide me like a little secret-"

Jacob paused, looking away from the hybrid who was standing there, speechless.

"You know what, have your little carefree life. Go on, keep pretending like you need no one. Like you don't need me. Were all just puppiets right? No feelings. Just like you, like you pretend to feel nothing."

Flying out the front door, Jacob placed his hands on his head then hit the frame with his fist.

'Why'd he say that? I'd hurt him. I had to fix it.'

Running through the doorway, she could see Jacob kicking the dirt as everyone watched him. Stomping up to his figure, her arm hit his shoulder. Brushing it off, he ignored her. Stepping infront of him, her minature body stood unmoving.

"I have feelings."

"Oh really? Are they hurt? Did I hurt these feelings that just snap out of no where when needed?"

"Yes, you did dog," she insulted him, something she only did when they were teaseing, but now, she as serious.

"Guess what bloodsucker? You hurt my feelings. Every god damn day of your life. You walk around like a zoobie. Pushing everyone away. You don't care about anything. Your selfish. You call me your bestfriend. Do you even care what you do to me? This act, the little show you try and put on. I don't buy it, but you put so much of your time into this waste of a nightmare fairytale of yours. Why would you want to be like that? Why are you so lifeless and fake? It's hard. I don't know when your not pretending anymore. When your just you. The real you. Your my Renesmee," he placed his hands on her upper arms, "Why do you try so hard? Every time you turn around you throw up another wall. And I break through them everyday. I have so many bruises. So many scars. All you do is put up more."

Shocking her, Jacob slammed her tiny figure into the side of the rusting truck that sat next to the two. Breathing hard, her eyes locked on him.

"Stop. All your bullshit. I hardly remember the times before you were not you. All these little tests to see what I'll do? How I'll react. You know. I'm not going anywhere. Yet you keep trying to push, to see if I'll stay. It's all a game to you. A test. Did I pass this time? How'd I score, huh?"

With one hand in a fist in the fresh dent of the medal, the other lifted her chin up.

"Did I pass? When are you going to be finished? Cause-" tears filled his warm dust-like eyes, "I can't take it anymore. Seriously your hurting me, Ness."

The hybrid had never seen him cry. Never seen him get this upset. Her heart was racing, beating faster than before. Resting his head on her shoulder, the hands of the shapeshifter hit and abused the side of the car until it was almost unoticeable.

Renesmee waited, until his hands had stoped moving. Smelling the fresh blood on his knuckles, she was carefull. Placing her, now unfrozen, moving hands to his warm heated cheeks, feeling the tears. Slowly, she lifted his face up. The sight, broke her heart.

Speechless, the young girl couldn't find words-to complement how sorry she was. How she'd never ment to hurt him, how she loved how he could read her, how she loved being real with him. How all she wanted was him, real without all the lies.

All that came out was, "I'm so sorry, Jake"

"Do you mean that? Or is it too keep me around?"

"Both?" she breathed out, after holding her breath for who knows how long.

Clenching his teeth, the shapeshifter looked past the hybrid.

"I want you around. That's not a lie. I'm not pretending-right now-this is real-this is me. That isn't either. I never meant to hurt you. I didn't want that. I was hiding, from you. I was lieing. I was wrong too. No matter what you kept coming back. I'm thankful for that. But-Jacob you kept secrets from me. For whatever reason. You lied, use to hide from me. So did I-"

"I had a reason-"

"Let me finish. I told you I never wanted things. Stupid things. Fake things. Like love, marraige and forever. I grew a fake barrier of bitterness for those things. I thought what I was saying was made me strong. I wanted to be that person. I wanted to make you think I didn't need that-or people to fill those roles. Because I don't. I have them. I have him. Had him. All along. He was there. Wheather or not I wanted to, I fell in love. I believed in forever, with him-with you. I wanted to believe I didn't have to have those things-so when they didn't happen I wouldn't be empty. There was no reason. I don't want that anymore. I don't have to be afraid, scared of needing things I didn't have. I didn't need to be. It was stupid."

Pressing her lips to his, she ran her hands threw his hair. For a moment, he tried to resist. It was a lost cause. Slamming her body against the medal again, he lifted her into his arms. Wrapping her legs around his waist, she pressed her palms to his face, pulling him closer. Letting go, with one hand, Jacob punched the rustic car again. His lips stoped moving.

"Ness, stop."

"No. I'm not scared anymore. I love you, Jacob. Do you hear me? I'm not pretending. I love you. And I don't care anymore. I don't care about not having someone. I don't care about being strong. I don't care if I'm weak. I want to love you. Those things I said I never wanted, they didn't matter to me. I had you all along. I loved you all along. Maybe not like this at first. Maybe not in this way. But they didn't matter because I didn't care either way. Wheather I would go on with this secret and you as a best friend. Or not. The marriage and forevers. I want you. If you need that, then you can have it. If you want forever, it's yours. If you want to marry me, then I'll be yours. Whatever you need, it's yours. And I'll say it hundred times. I love you, Jacob Black. I love you. I love you. I love you. Just don't walk away. Don't leave. I don't care, if you want me to take it all back. If you want to be bestfriends. I don't care. All I want is you. Don't walk away. Cause I can't live without you. I'm nothing without you. I'm the lifeless-the real lifeless. And it's gone. All the lies, the pretending. I love you, that's real."

Then his warm lips pressed against hers, holding her face in his hands. The hot tears rolled down his face again. Renesmee was breathless, wiping the liquid off his face as she kissed him back. His hands, the blood of his knuckles, grabbed at her face. The urge, it was there, but it didn't fire burned, hotter than before. Realseing the nuclear bombs inside. No more hiding, no more slow sparks. It was all ashes of grenades, blowing in fumes of passion. This was her, the real her.

"I-" Kiss. "Lo-" Kiss. "Love-" Kiss. "You" Kiss. "Ness." Kiss. "So much." Kiss.

Tears ran down the hybrid's face.

For moments that seemed like hours, werewollfs, humans and a vampire watched the two in silence. It was odd for them too see, Renesmee knew that much.

"Seth's birthda-" Emily started to say slowly, not wanting to entrude.

"Of course, I'm so sorry" Renesmee said, pulling her body away for her love, but keeping her eyes on him.

Laughing, Jacob ran over to Emily and started handing out stuff, letting the tall pregnate imprint rest.


Picking streamers up and hanging them on the wooden ceiling, decorating the small room. The only other vampire there, Alice, stared wide-eyed at Renesmee. Giggling, Renesmee turned to her aunt.

"Ali, is there something wrong?"

Breathing in, Alice shook her head, "We need to talk later, right now it's Seth's 18th"

Nodding, Renesmee's smile faded a bit, thinking about what the pixie vampire would want to say. Knowing the Cullens all had doubts about the relationship between the opposites, all for there own reasons. But Alice and Emmett had always been the most suportive with everything Renesmee choose for herself. There had to be something wrong, really wrong.

Painting a half-fake half-genuine smile on her face, the hybrid continued to fix up the diecorations. From the window, Renesmee could see Jacob, smiling big, real smiling. That was rare. Was this the reason? Her truth? The real truth. Was he waiting for it? Did he know? He was her imprint. This is what was suppost to happen.

Then, suddenly, Renesmee realized something she had been missing. This love, wasn't chosen by her. It was forced. Everyday she had seen Jacob, been with him. Been his best friend. The male friends she had at school, where dull and boring-but would she feel that way about them if Jacob hadn't of been so present in her life. Would she feel this way if it was not forced? If she had another opinion. Would she still pick him? A werewolf? And did he know? Expect it? Even from a half-vampire.

Looking around, she could see how happy all the other imprintees were with they're imprinters. They were human thow, this new magical thing would have seemed fairytale like to them. Didn't it feel that way to Renesmee? No. She'd known about this mystical world from the moment she was born, and it had always bugged her that she hadn't had a normal, real life before all this. The soulless creature never had a chance at something normal. That had been something she use to wish for, dream about. And now, she was in love with a werewolf? A diffrent, unatural creature. Which intadaled that her life was even worst than just-not normal. Why?

'I'm complicating things, slow down. Take a deep breath, and just keep breathing. You'll make it through.'

That wasn't the first time Renesmee had said that sentance to herself, she she knew it wouldn't be her last.

Keep breathing-you'll be okay-


Ducking behind the couch, Renesmee watched as Emily pressed her hand to the tall teenager's back, guideing him. Once they got to the door, Kim motioned us to all be ready.

As he entered the house, Emily switched on the light. And to her delight, the room was still dark. Then, jumping up, everyone yelled- "Suprize!"

Laughing, Seth tried to catch his breath.

"Goodness, you guys suck!" he yelled, bending over with his hand on his racing heart.

Everyone laughed, almost everyone. Renesmee was having a moment, an realization acctually. This was probally the most normal experience the young girl had ever had. Even though she was surrounded by a pack of werewolves, there mystal loves, and her family of vampires, and only a few elderly human's, a suprize birthday is something most teenage girl's had experienced by age 15.

Nudging her, Jacob smiled at her. Although it didn't follow up to his beautiful eyes, Renesmee was content-she had seen that smile for most of the day. Until her mind-intrudeing father showed up-which was an explaination in itself. Blushing, the hybrid turned back to the bubbly teenager being honored.

Everything that a normal, human brithday would have was there, birthday cake, presents-even ballons and steamers. This was truely a diverson of something natural.


Later that night, Renesmee had taken a seat on the wooden swing on the back deck of the Uley household. Looking up a the stary night sky, the hybrid cleared her mind, wishing she was a star. A big ball of flaming light, no one could touch her-hurt her-harm her-get to her.

Laughing, Seth Clearwater threw himself out the glass door and shut it behind him. Without a word, he sat down beside the hybrid.

"So I heard about the big-bang," the now 18-year-old said, pressing his root beer bottle to his lips to take a sip.

"Yeah?" Renesmee asked, looking up at him.

"Embry and Leah told me.." he added, looking over at the young teenage girl.

"Well, how'd the gossip come out?"

"Basically, Jacob yelled at you and beat the crap outta Jared's truck, and you told him you loved him? Then ya'll had an innaproprite make-out session."

"Umph, the gossip could have been a little better."

"I agree, it sounds pretty lame. Not like miss. lonley forever-Nessie I know."

Sighing, the mahogany haired girl knew what he meant. Other than Jacob, Seth was one of the few close friends she had. He'd known the fake side of her, and just like Jacob, didn't believe a second of it.

"Yes, I am a bit disapointed in myself."

"As am I. For a while, you had me going."

"Am I fake? Like cratch-the-makeup-off-with-nails but with personality, discusting kind of fake."

Laughing, the boy answered, "No. To be honest, there was a time Jacob was just like you. That little phase you go through when it's better not to need anyone. He had it bad. You atleast admitted it to him. He had no one."

"Really?"

"Yes. Most kids go through it-of course I never did. I dig them chicks, ya know? And they dig all that fake crap."

"That's a real nice philosophy you got there."

"I think so too. What's the point in acting like you don't need people, right? When you could be working on finding those that fill the gaps."

"So, any lucky winners yet?"

"Not a chance. I'm gonna be the only male not to imprint."

"Yeah? What about Embry?"

"Oh-I hate him. He is a devil. You know that blonde girl from your school you use to talk to to pass time? The cheerleader. Yep, that little mutt imprinted on her. Lucky bastard."

Giggling, Renesmee turned to face Seth, "Awe' you'll be okay. If all else fails, you could go through that little childish phase."

"Yeah-thought about it. Waste of my time."

"You know, they say when you stop looking, you'll find it."

"Oh really, never heard that one before. Is that your chessey story?"

"Nah, I never started."

Laughing, Seth rolled his eyes at the young half-breed.

"Your not so bad, kid. I'm glad Jacob imprinted on you. But, i'm gonna warn you-Sam isn't so pleased about it. He thinks it'll be-blah blah blah. You should have seen his face when my sister was telling me about your little love connection, he was so pissy."

"Why?"

"He thinks you'll hurt Jacob, and cause things to happen. He doesn't trust you-because he's not sure of the safty of his pack. It's a long story-"

"Like Tancumii."

"Um-I never thought about it. I guess your right. It makes sense."

"He thinks I'll have demon babies with Jacob?"

Laughing, the two rolled their eyes at the thought of Sam Uley.

"What does it matter anyway? He can't stop you-like if you wanted t-"

"Hello, still fifteen down here. Not thinking about having evil children anytime soon. I'm still getting past the five year age diffrence."

"Oh-sorry. You seem older than you are all the time."

"If you want to get tecnical, I'm five. Plus, it's you guy's fault. None of you let me be fifteen."

"Very true. But this is because your vocabuary at three months was better than mine at the time."

"Yes, it was."

Banging on the glass door, Jared, Paul and Embry threw themselves on the glass, motioning Seth inside.

"Go kid. Enjoy your party. You only turn 18 once."

"Ha. Or in all of our case, every year for forever."

"Yeah.."

Then, the teenager went inside. Leaving Renesmee to the silence of the night again.

To be honest, there was a time Jacob was just like you-He had no one.