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Luffy bounded down the path while Gold and Silver socialized behind him. Hyperbeam had fallen asleep again, but Toto and Cinders were as lively as ever. The party was headed for the Pokemon School, where they hoped to teach Luffy some battle pointers.
"Turn here," Gold called, looking up from the map on his PokéGear. He had finally decided to install the card that Luffy gave him. "The school is on your right."
Luffy looked utterly bemused, so Silver ushered him in, explaining: "These nice people will tell you all about stat problems and training…"
"Are you kidding? All that's in here is stat problems!" Gold cried, pointing at the blackboard of clearly stat-problem-central information.
Luffy narrowed his eyes at both of them. "How did you think this would help, since I can't read a word of your language, anyway?" The two boys looked at each other, realizing their plan had been doomed from the start.
"Let's go, then." Gold led them back outside. "That place had no useful information, anyway…" Cinders trotted after him, flaring up every few moments or so to keep from growing bored.
Luffy stayed for a while, staring at the strange writing with Hyperbeam in his arms. "This makes no sense." After imparting his words of wisdom to the nearest rookie trainer, he dashed after his friends.
…
"Let's just go to the gym," Silver suggested, trying to change their course. Gold shook his head, pulling the redhead by his collar to the Bellsprout Tower without a word. "No-! Come on, please! They'll kill Toto in there!"
Gold shrugged, having nothing to worry about, as Cinders was a fire-type. "She'll just have to get stronger then, won't she?"
"Yeah! Like Hyperbeam!" Luffy cheered, with nothing to worry about because he didn't know anything about using grass-type moves against grass-type pokémon.
Gold opened the door, pushing Silver and Toto inside first. "All those Bellsprouts are weaklings, I can promise you that! You've got nothing to be concerned about. Toto will know what to do."
"Tackle Tackle Tackle!" Toto growled, waving her fists like she'd seen Luffy do.
"See? What did I tell you?"
…
Luffy ran rampant throughout the tower, waking up Hyperbeam every five seconds to take out a little plant or purple rat thing. The Tackle Technique was enough for Hyperbeam, and he was soon level 27. Toto was faring much the same, but still at level 15.
"Yeah, Cinders! Take 'em out! Use Ember this time!" And Gold was being a show off, using unnecessary fire-type moves to display his type advantage… but also because Luffy liked watching the little plant things burn.
Silver pulled him away from the disturbing spectacle. "I thought pokémon were friends, not candles."
"They are! But this is for training, and Gold said it's all right. If they attack us, we can attack them back!" Luffy raised his fists in triumph as his battle buddy dealt yet another one-hit KO, and Hyperbeam copied his stance.
Soon all of the pokémon were waving their fists at the Bellsprouts, scaring the plant things away and moving on to the crazy trainers. Gold and Silver looked on in stunned silence.
"Sort of like Yawn, huh? It's contagious," Gold whispered.
Silver nodded, unsure if a Quilava was even anatomically capable of standing on its hind legs. "Yeah. But it's warding off the wild pokémon, so they won't be beaten up needlessly. A pretty cool move, I'd say."
"Whoa! They've got his face, too!" Gold exclaimed, pointing at the four toothy snarls. Eight eyes burned with ferocity, but only the one scar stood prominent on the legendary's face.
Silver moaned, putting his head in his hands. "They're already acting like pirates…"
"What do you mean? Pirates?!" Gold tugged Silver along as their pokémon ascended the ladder, already having beaten a poor sage and his plant things.
"Luffy admitted to stealing my pokémon from the lab, and he managed to infuriate some high-ranking police officer. Now he's been dubbed a land pirate. Since we're traveling with him, that makes us pirates, too."
Gold shrugged. "Can't say I'm surprised." On the inside, however, he was seething with rage at the rubber pokémon in front of him. ' There go my chances at being a legal Champion…'
Cinders used Tackle for a one-hit KO and stamped his feet in victory. "Victory dances?" Gold paled. "Is Luffy teaching them all of this?"
"Nah, it looks like they're just having fun!" It was Silver's turn to pull Gold after the rest of the group, which was now descending a different ladder to get to the first floor again.
When the boys got down, their pokémon were already skipping off to the next ladder on the far side of the room. Silver once again marveled at the balance of Cinders, whom he was now sure was not supposed to be bipedal. Grabbing Gold, the redhead scrambled after them, not wanting to be left behind, helpless against a Professor Elm attack.
…
"This is great!" Luffy cried when they'd reached the top floor. "A trainer for each of you! Get going!"
Gold and Silver stared as each pokémon fought a different trainer with no orders from the boys. "How are they doing that?" Gold muttered.
Silver gave him a little shove. "Shut up and watch!"
Cinders flowed through the battle as if it was a dance. A beautiful dance, one that sent Flame Wheel and Ember shooting out at his opponents, engulfing them to burn them slowly. The fire on his head burned a bright blue, its tongues looking almost like hair as he displayed extreme agility and balance in his art.
Hyperbeam jumped around, cutting apart his enemies with Slashes from his sharp leaf -"When did he learn Slash?"- and using Razor Leaf as a finishing move. His attacks were composed of brute force, relying heavily on his skill at finding weak points in his enemies' defenses.
Toto darted around, displaying a sudden increase in speed. With each Tackle she landed, she released a loud squawk of triumph, and sometimes even a quack. She rushed at her enemy plant things, giving them no time to move before she knocked them out with Tackle.
And Luffy just sat back and watched, not remembering he was a pokémon and was therefore supposed to participate in a battle, as well. Gold glowered at him, marching over as soon as the other warriors had finished. "Okay. You get to fight that old guy's pokémon," he said, pointing at the man standing at the far end of the floor.
"Huh? What?" Luffy snorted awake as Hyperbeam crawled into his arms for another nap, now level 32. "Oh, I get to fight? Great! Thanks!"
Watching him prance up to the senior trainer made Gold consider whether making him battle was a punishment or an honor. He was a legendary. But what if he didn't get many chances to fight?
"Gum-Gum Pistol! Gum-Gum Bazooka! Gum-Gum Pistol! Ok, l win!"
Clearly, the battle was a joke. No pokémon stood a chance against those foreign rubber-type moves. Gold sighed. "Well, if Hyperbeam can't beat Falkner, Luffy can always switch him out with himself…"
…
The party was finally at the gym. Luffy stood in front of Falkner, his fists clenched. "I've tracked you down to here, bad guy! Now it's time to pay!"
The gym leader was extremely confused. "I'm not a bad guy! I'm just a poor kid with weak pokémon I inherited from my father that I can't even level up because everyone that comes to my gym beats them senseless!"
"Oh. Then, it's my turn!" Luffy rolled up his sleeves, which wasn't quite necessary because he'd already rolled them up for the last two trainers in the gym.
Gold pulled him back. "No need to beat him senseless just yet, Luffy! Why don't you let Silver and me go first?"
"…All right," the rubber boy muttered, making a pouty face as he looked away. "But just this once."
Cinders was sent out, and he proceeded to burn the Pidgey out of the sky. When Falkner sent out a Pidgeotto, Cinders acted on his own and used Flame Wheel to bring it down. One Tackle after the bird used Gust was enough to knock it out, and Falkner moaned. He pulled out a package of Revives and sighed again.
"For pity's sake! My dad's… Wait, can we save this for later? After all of you have beaten me?" Falkner looked worn out already, so Gold and Silver nodded sympathetically.
"My turn." Silver sent out Toto, while Luffy watched boredly. The battle was over in two moves, both executed by the Croconaw. Luffy clapped politely, then bounded up to the blue-haired boy.
"Can I go now?" He asked eagerly, watching as Falkner revived his fallen birds and patted them tenderly.
He frowned at the boy. "And who might you be? You don't like like a normal funky-dressed trainer…"
"He's a pokémon," Gold explained, picking up Cinders so he could better view Luffy's battle. "You're not going to like this."
Falkner shuddered and reluctantly sent out his Pidgey. When Hyperbeam hopped forwards, the boy laughed in relief. "Ha! Are you kidding?! I was expecting something more, like an electric-type. But this… Just use Tackle, Pidgey!"
"You dare mock Hyperbeam?!" Luffy's eyes were covered by the rim of his hat, but his companions could see the anger that emanated from his stance. "Go! Use Magical Leaf!"
The Pidgey was KO'd in one hit, even though the move wasn't particularly effective. "I don't even have to get involved in this battle," Luffy growled, his eyes aflame. "Hyperbeam will make you sorry you ever said that!"
The Chikorita gnashed his teeth, a fierce snarl on his normally cute little face. "Hypo… BEAM!"
"What the…" Gold's mouth dropped open. "Is he just using any old move he feels like?"
Luffy shook his head. "Nah, he's definitely learning them!"
Hyperbeam's Hyper Beam was a one-hit KO, by far the most powerful move the Pidgeotto had ever been hit with. The level 13 bird crumpled to the ground, and Hyperbeam flicked his leaf backwards as though he was sheathing a sword.
Luffy's posture was still stern, but his eyes were sparkling with delight. "That was so COOL, Hypo! You used a BEAM!" The Chikorita bounced up and down, clearly as excited about the move as his childish master. Silver face-palmed. That little Chikorita was too powerful…
"Here… Zephyr Badge… Use Rock Smash out of battle, and pokémon up to… 20…" Falkner collapsed next to his pokémon, three badges in his outstretched hand. The boy's face was slightly singed, and Gold wondered if Hyperbeam had been aiming for the Pidgeotto at all.
Luffy snatched up a badge and pinned it to Hyperbeam's leaf. "Luffy, that's not what you're supposed to do with them," Silver muttered, head in his hands.
"Then what else are we supposed to do with them?" Luffy countered, refusing to remove Hyperbeam's new accessory. His leaf boy stuck out its chest proudly, waving his leaf from side to side.
Gold shrugged, taking his own badge and pinning it on Cinders' ear. "He's got a point. There really is no purpose to them. We don't have a case to put badges in, so our pokémon can have all the fun they want."
Silver gaped at him. What were his friends doing with such valuable collectibles?! This was too much… "Come on, To- ACK!" His Croconaw had applied the last badge to one of her many spikes and was admiring it happily. The redhead groaned. "Fine.."
The six friends left the gym laughing and joking, unaware of the bright pair of eyes watching them from a rift in time…
So, who knows what One Piece characters are being represented by the three pokémans? Two aren't the correct gender, though. Any suggestions for the next ones?
[Edited: 8-14-18]
[Original Release Date: Don't ask. I don't know.]
Footnote: What? I can actually get something done when I set my mind to it?
