CHAPTER 7
Ulquiorra Cifer

1. Have you ever fantasized about Grimmjow in dirty day dreams?

Ulquiorra- I beg your pardon?!

Me- It's a simple question. Just yes or no.

Ulquiorra- Why did I agree to this?

Me- I'm the one asking the questions here! Now answer this one!

Ulquiorra- *sighs* No, I have not fantasized about Grimmjow in dirty day dreams.

Me- Boy I have. *Ulquiorra rolls his eyes* What? He is the sexy sexta espada.

Ulquiorra- I can't believe I was dragged into this.


2. Did you get a boner from seeing Harribel for the first time? If yes, did you masturbate afterwards?

Ulquiorra- What kind of question is that?

Me- Questions my awsome reviewers came up with.

Ulquiorra- Can I um *clears throat* ask you a question?

Me- If you must.

Ulquiorra- *leans over and whispers* What's a boner? *I fall out of my chair in a giggle fit*


3. Have you ever had sex with a guy?

Ulquiorra- Is that even possible?

Me- Yes actually. Man, for a guy who supposidly knows a lot, you are in the dark when it comes to things like sex.

Ulquiorra- I was made to serve Lord Aizen. I have no need for sexual desires.

Me- Liar. Every guy dreams of having sex at some point in their life.

Ulquiorra- Abd how do you know this?

Me- My five year old second cousin came up to my bathroom door while I was drying off from a shower and said he wanted to see me naked. I told him no and he said his 'pinky' went 'upsie'.

Ulquiorra- And the morale to that story is to keep your bathroom door shut.

Me- I was at my grandmother's house and that particular door won't close right. You have to pull open a drawer to keep it from swinging open.


4. Is that make-up on you or are you naturally pale?

Ulquiorra- I'm naturally pale.

Me- *reaches out and runs finger down cheek* Wow, you're telling the truth.

Ulquiorra- Did you expect me to lie?

Me- Usually guys hate being pale.

Ulquiorra- Well, it doesn't really matter to me.


5. Why is your hollow hole on your neck?

Ulquiorra- Because it was like that when I was created.

Me- Nu uh. At first it was almost on your chest.

Ulquiorra- It was still partly on my neck.

Me- I guess so...


6. Did you like taking care of Orihime?

Ulquiorra- Not really. She was stubborn, too confident with her friends, and had an annoying habit of crying constantly.

Me- Well I would too if I was kidnapped and the one I loved was risking his life to save me!

Ulquiorra- You humans rely too much on emotions.

Me- Says you emo boy.


7. Do you fantasize about Orihime?

Ulquiorra- No. I do not. Nnoitra may, but I certainly do not.


8. Is there anything between you and Orihime?

Ulquiorra- Like I said before, no. Nothing is going on between us. She's in love with that Kurosaki kid.


9. What is it like being the fourth espada?

Ulquiorra- I like being the fourth espada. I have great power that can be put to use for Lord Aizen when he calls for me to fight.

Me- Plus you can kick Grimmjow's ass!

Ulquiorra- That too, but only if he gets himself into a fight with me.


10. Do you know about all the sex stories about you, Orihime, Aizen, or Grimmjow?

Ulquiorra- There's stories as well?! *actually showing emotion*

Me- Yep. Mighty smokey ones too if I might add. *chuckles evily* oh, and the pictures on deviantart are fantastic as well.


11. Have you ever been tempted to kiss Grimmjow?

Ulquiorra- *more emotion* No!


12. What would you do if Aizen confessed his love for you?

Ulquiorra- I'd quit.


13. Have you ever had any sex dreams for any of the espada? Or for a certain orange-haired beauty with healing powers?

Ulquiorra- *groans* I wish you hadn't brought that one up.... The stories are enough.


14. Whose your favorite current captain?

Ulquiorra- In the Gotei 13?

Me- Yes.

Ulquiorra- I don't like any of them. Why would I like soul reapers?

Me- *shrugs* I don't know. Ask the reviewer who wanted me to ask this question, not me. *grins*

Ulquiorra- Who is the captain of Squad Six? If I had to choose, it would be him.

Me- *sighs* He is hot. *giggles* You're like his evil fraternal twin! You both rarely show emotions and only like to fight with reason.

Ulquiorra- ...........


15. What do you think of people calling you Batman since your final battle with Ichigo?

Ulquiorra- That's a new nickname...

Me- Yeah, I ha neve heard it before... BATMAN! Hey, it has a nice ring to it for you... Or Ulquibat!

Ulquiorra- Ulqui-bat?

Me- Yeah! Ulquibat! Ulquiorra+Bat= Ulquibat! It's perfect!


16. Have you ever thought of dying your hair?

Ulquiorra- No. It would ruin my mask fragment.

Me- I can't see you with different colored hair...


17. If you were forced to make out with either Hallibel or Neliel (in her adult form), who would it be? Have to choose!

Ulquiorra- I have to choose? *I nod* Fine. *I scoot closer* Nel. Because she probably wouldn't murder me if I did it.

Me- Haha! Yeah, Hallibel looks like she is PMSing all the time.


18. What's you most embarassing memory? Or awkward memory.

Ulquiorra- When grimmjow managed to sent me into that other deminsion so he could fight Ichigo. I had forgotten that we had those things.


19. Do you and the three higher up espada take steroids?

Ulquiorra- What are those?

Me- Never mind.

Ichigo- HEY! EMO! We haven't finished our fight! *crashes through the door and randomly swings his zanpaku-to around*

Me- Hey! We aren't finished! *boys disappear* Ugh. Super glue doesn't work with Arrancar. *makes note*


Im sorry its so short! Up next is.......... Gin Ichimaru! So give me some questions!!!