Pain. All I could feel was pain. As far as I could tell the awful ache was spread across my body.

Every now and then the pain would boil over in waves of torture causing me to scream out. Then after what felt like hours at a time, I would black out, only to suffer the pain all over again when I become aware. Why was I hurting so much?

I remember Edward telling me once about the change. the change into a vampire. He had told me that it was unlike anything anybody could ever experience, that the pain was so overwhelming that you would beg to die.

He said that it would feel like blades of fire were piercing all of your skin and rivers of liquid flames ran through your veins. When you are first bitten it would feel like a dull ache then bit by bit it would spread until it entered into a main artery or vein which would rush the venom to the heart. Once the venom is in the heart it his pumped vigorously throughout the body. That is when the fire intensifies. It's when the screaming starts. It's when the desire for death rises. For three days. Right up until your heart stutters its last beat.

Is that what is happening to me? Am I becoming a vampire?

I was having some of the symptoms. I was hurting all over but then again it wasn't that fire Edward had described. I know I was unconscious for a while. When I was first became aware that I was in pain it was all I could focus on but after a while I tried to start counting, wanting to know how long I was out of it, but somewhere around three hours and twelve minutes I lost track after hearing Edward. He was begging me to wake up. After that I didn't bother with counting. I pushed all of my attention on Edward until it was time again to black out. Even though I was in agony, a part of me was hoping that I was becoming a vampire. I would be like the Cullens. Like Edward. His equal.

What didn't add up to the theory of me transforming into a vampire was that I wasn't feeling like I was burning alive. Edward did say that before your heart stopped beating you would feel as if you are charred to a cinder. Put this was more of an intense ache. Another confusing thought was came to mind. Why would Edward change me? It is not something he would do on a whim.

Now that I come to think of it, if Edward did decide this, then how come I don't remember him doing it. Or us discussing it.

If I am in the middle of the change how did it happen? This is so unlike Edward. The last time we talked about the change, when he was describing his own personal experience, he seemed horrified by the idea of that happening to me. Completely against it. My memory of before this is a complete blank. The only logical explanation I could think of, if I was changing, was that maybe James got to us. To me.

Before I could put any more thought on that, once again the pain intensified in another wave, erupting around my leg. Then a scream burst out of my mouth. This set off more pain near my chest and rib area. "Shhh. Bella, It's okay. I have you." I heard Edward whisper. I could feel his cool hands being placed on my shoulder. It felt good, soothing. Unfortunately it didn't stop the screaming. "Please. You need to stop moving." Moving? I felt his hands move from my shoulders down to my abdomen. "I'm sorry if this hurts." With that he pressed down. He was right it did hurt. I felt my back touching a surface of some kind, then I realised what he was doing. I had my back arching out from the pain and he was pushing it back down.

I let out one more whimper before losing myself again in the black abyss.

I don't know how long I was out but his time I felt that I could attempt to open my eyes. I struggled at first but eventually light seeped through onto my retinas, blinding me briefly, then I could see the gold spectrum of the ceiling. I guess we were in our bedroom.

A few things hit me at once. First I noticed I still had a heartbeat, which lead to me noticing that my vision was still the same and so was my hearing. Also there was my definite need for oxygen. I guess the vampire theory was wrong. Then I realised if I wasn't becoming a vampire, what happened to me?

I noticed something cold wrapped around my hand and saw Edward holding it. His head was down and he kept murmuring 'please' over and over.

"Ed-Edward." I rasped out. I guess my throat was dry but he heard me anyway.

"Bella? Oh thank God." He jumped up and caressed my face as if to brush hair out of the way. "How do you feel?"

"Wat-water." My throat felt like a chainsaw ripped through it as I ground that one word out. He silently disappeared from my sight, only to return five seconds later holding a glass of water with a straw.

"Take small sips." I did as he said, wrapping my lips around the straw and pulling small amounts of water into my mouth at a time. Each sip felt rejuvenating against my parched throat.

When I was done he placed the glass on the bedside table and took my hand again. "How long have I been out?"

"Almost two days." H replied.

"What happened?" I asked, more than curious.

A mixture of emotions crossed his face at the same time. Sadness, confusion, shock and worry. "Bella, you don't remember?" I shook my head in decline. "You had an accident. My fault really." he continued, "You don't remember us going to the cliff? The fall? Anything?" Once again I shook my head.

I tried hard to remember the events of that day. Nothing was coming to me. Not until I looked into Edwards eyes, then everything came bombarding me. I remembered everything.


Two days after we went to the beautiful tidal pools, Edward and I sitting in the living room watching yet another movie. I wasn't complaining about this. The Cullens had an extensive movie collection, every genre I could think of. We were watching a French movie called 'Paris, je t'aime.' It was a collection of small movies. Some funny, but all different. Edward, always considerate, put up the subtitles to help my language barrier. I had to laugh at the story of the man in the subway station. He had read in that, as a cardinal rule, you avoid eye contact with people in the Paris metro, but he broke it when he stared at a couple who were getting a little too friendly with each other across the tracks. This resulted in a very hilarious verbal lashing from the man when they caught him staring. It was hilarious.

When the movie was finished I went to the kitchen to make lunch. I just started pulling condiments out of the fridge when Edward strolled in. "Remember two days ago when I said there were a few places I wanted to

show you on the island?" He asked.

"Yes." I replied continuing to take food out.

"How would you feel about going to another one?"

"Now?" I asked. He took my hands off the food and continued, "Yes now. If you're hungry we can pack something."

I readily agreed. After all the last trip was amazing. While I packed a couple of sandwiches and a bottle of water I asked Edward about where we were going. With us both remembering the effects of our stubbornness, me falling on my backside and Edward realising that his stubbornness causes me to be stubborn and which results in a not so fun time, we both decided to try and avoid those situations. So Edward decided it was wise to feed me some information. "It's an area just at the cliffs. And you will need me to carry you for this one, so please don't complain."

"I promise."

As soon as we were fully packed into a backpack, Edward crouched slightly. "Hop on." I quickly hopped onto his back with my lunch secured to mine. With that we were out the door and into the trees in no time.

I'm glad I got used to these Vampire piggyback rides. They were beyond exhilarating as the trees blurred into a green streak. During our run I tuck the opportunity to smell Edward. I wondered if it was creepy to sniff someone. Even if he is your boyfriend. I had noticed Edward's pleasant sent before. It reminded me of sunshine. "Are you smelling me?" Edward's voice brought me out of my thoughts. I guess, Edward being Edward, caught me in the act. I can't believe I got caught. That is so embarrassing. I had to think of something. What could I say? He knows I was sniffing him.

"Emmm… No, I wasn't. My nose was running slightly." I said quickly. Great if believed that he probably believes I'm a breathing ground for bacteria. Lovely. He just chuckled at my reply and I could tell just there that he didn't believe a word I said.

"Don't be embarrassed, Bella. I think you have a splendid aroma too."

" Don't be so big headed. What if I thought you smelled funny?"

"Do you think I smell funny?" I asked as if me confirming this would be a blatant lie.

"Well no, But you don't need to be so cocky." Of course he laughed at this.

"My apologies." He stated. "Like I said your smell good too."

"You mean I smell good enough to eat." I knew my blood called to him. That he found it harder than the rest of the Cullens to resist the temptation of drinking it. To me it's probably like getting my favourite food, and being told I'm not allowed to eat it. Although it's probably worse than that for him.

"You know it's more that that. Yes you smell delicious but you have a brilliant floral bouquet flowing through your veins. Similar to freesias.

Just then we were at a huge wall. A cliff face. "See that ledge two thirds of the way up?" He asked. "That's where we're going." With that he proceeded to jump onto the cliff and scale up the rest. His fingers sinking into the rock as if it was butter. Just looking at that was a reminder of the power he had.

When we reached the ledge, he placed me inside. It was like a tiny cave. I remained seated but if I stood it would only take two steps to reach the back and three or four steps from side to side. I guess what Edward wanted me to see was the view from up here. Sitting up high on a cliff gave us a startling scene. From here I could see the entire expanse of the island. Right out to the beach and out as far as a speck of the main land in the distance. It was amazing.

"Edward." I gasped out in awe.

"I thought you might like this. It's a good place to think." He said looking out to the horizon himself. Silently I got on my knees and reached up to kiss him on the cheek. Whispering, "I love you."

He turned to me and replied with, "I love you too." and he then kissed me properly on my lips.

Twenty minutes later I was ready to eat and rustled out my lunch. This time it was plain ham and cheese. I always find that elaborate food is great but you just can't beat simplicity. I quietly ate my food while Edward entertained himself by playing with my hair and humming a song I recognised as my lullaby.

"Edward? Do you think I could call Charlie? Just to ease his mind."

Yeah sure. You can call him when we get back to the house."

"Can I call him now?" I asked.

"I left my phone back in the house." He must have saw my disappointment because he quickly amended, "But if you sit tight I'll run back and get it."

I quickly agreed. Charlie I probably sitting by the phone waiting for my call. The second Edward was gone I missed his presence.

I took the last bite of my sandwich and took a sip of water before reaching for the bag. I don't know how it happened but before I could get a grasp on it, the backpack went over the edged. Without much thought I went to the edge to look over to see if it was okay and not caught up in a tree. It never occurred to me that, even if it was up a tree, Edward would simply climb up and get it without much effort. Still I leaned over. The next second my foot came out from under me and my surroundings became a huge blur. I can't remember if I let out a scream or not. The last thing I remembered was the thud my body made when it reached the ground before blacking out.


"I remember." I blurted out with tears forming in my eyes. I can't believe I fell off a cliff. I had heard of some of the boys from LaPush cliff diving as a hobby. For fun. Although they had the ocean to fall into, I had the ground. It was definitely not a fun experience.

Another wave of pain shot through me. My scream caused Edward to panic. "What hurts?"

"My leg." It was just then that I noticed the bandages wrapped around various bits of my body and stitches on my arm. Edward then placed a bag of ice on it. It helped but only slightly.

"What happened?"

"I thought you said you remembered."

"I do but only up until I hit the ground." When I said this he flinched as if I electrocuted him.

"Well, you remember I left to get my phone from the house." he paused looking up silently asking if I did. I nodded in confirmation and he continued, "When I got in the house the phone was already ringing. It was Alice. She was screaming at me so much that I could barely understand her. Then she calmed enough to tell me to hurry back to you. I didn't bother to ask what was wrong I just ran. No sooner had I left to run back to you did I hear you screaming." He took an unnecessary deep breath. "I didn't know what to think. When I saw you lying there, Bella, I didn't know what to do. I mean you weren't moving and there was so much blood. I couldn't do anything. I wanted your blood so much.

"I'm such a monster. You were dieing and I couldn't help."

"Edward, your not a monster-" I tried to cut him off but he would let me.

"Yes I am. A normal boyfriend- an normal person wouldn't of just stood there. They would have helped. And-"

"Edward you obviously did help me. Unless there is some mystery person that popped out of nowhere. I know my blood is extra tasty and it was a struggle but you clearly overcame that. You need to stop this of what you didn't do and start think that if it wasn't for you I wouldn't be here."

"Exactly. If it wasn't for me you would be here broken and in pain."

I was starting to get frustrated. "You need to stop this pity party you're having for yourself. I'm alive because of you. Get that through your head and stop being stupid. Just tell me what happened"

"Sorry. I just love you and I don't want anything happening to you. Anyway like I said you lying there and I was busy trying to resist your blood. I don't know if you remember this but while you where on the ground you said my name."

"I did?"

"Yeah you did. It snapped me out of it and I held my breath. I checked your wounds. Your arm was bleeding the most so I strapped it off with my belt. when the bleeding slowed I rushed you to the house. I got Carlisle on the phone to instruct me. It's funny that I have three medical degrees and I still needed Carlisle. He talked me through it. I stitched you and wrapped you up. It was excruciating waiting for you to wake up. Hearing you scream. It was horrible."

"How come I wasn't taken to the hospital?" If he was struggling that much wouldn't it have been easier?

"Bella there was no time. You fell nearly one hundred feet off a cliff. Your lucky there were a few trees below that broke your fall. if I had taken you on the boat and out to the hospital you would have died." he started, "Never mind that if you went to the hospital your name would have immediately been out in the database. Charlie would have been alerted. Then there would have been a huge possibility that James would have found out. We can't risk your life like that when I could do what needed to be done."

"I guess I hadn't thought of that. So what is the damage?"

"Your left leg is broken, as well as your left arm, two broken ribs, a large cut on your right arm which required twenty stitch, a bump to the head and most of your body is covered in bruises." he said solemnly.

"I guess that means I won't be moving around a whole lot." I said jokingly trying to lighten his mood but a part of thought of how crap the situation is.

"Bella you have to stay in bed for a while. I'll bring you food and I can bring the television in. Maybe some books. The only time you are allowed out of this bed is when you need your human moments. But even then I'll be bringing you in and out of the bathroom."

I guess I'll need to get used to this. I can already tell that, at some point in this recovery period, I'm going to be stubborn and try to do things my way. Hopefully I won't be putting Edward out too much. I just hate feeling helpless.

All I could think as just then was 'bring it on.'

A.N.

Well well well. Poor Bella. I felt it was about time something happened to break there happy time on Isle Esme. Sad business, I know.

On my profile are links to pictures of the house and Bella's lullaby if you want a listen

Anyway let me know what you think.

Toodles xx