Okay, just for you guys to know, this is gonna be pretty much of a strange chapter, but it explains a lot of the others flashbacks, so uh … enjoy.
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::Chapter 7::
No screaming, no begging, no swearing … nothing but his mother's orders and his sister's lamentations.
This wasn't good. He felt the odour of death slithering on the walls of their house, filling the air around him with a disturbing aroma.
His body was numb and uncoordinated. His mind, pained and tortured.
Akamaru's head lying on his lap was mechanically caressed by frozen fingers. His canine companion had attached himself as well to this frail being losing her life at that moment within those ramparts of wood that separated him from her.
That day he made contact with It for the first time. The first time its scornful, vicious voice sent shivers all over his body, poisoning his mind.
"You see … she wants to die. She wants to leave you by any means. Kru, kru, kru … She knows you don't deserve her … She loves that Hyûga guy or maybe Uzumaki … It is unfair … It is so unfair …"
In the beginning it was an almost inaudible whisper, following powerful emotions.
°°
A high silhouette stormed out of his dwelling, not paying attention to him.
The night was blank, no stars, no moon, no light. No sounds other than those of the nurses Haruno had brought along.
One month and a half sooner than expected.
He remembered that they haven't realized before the fourth month. How ridiculous! She did throw up a lot and often, however, even if he bugged her to go see a med-nin, she always laughed it off and teased him about him overprotecting her. And he wouldn't insist, knowing how little she liked to undress in front of strangers. He thanked his kami he was no stranger … though if he had been one, nothing would have happened …
She was the kind to crave and hunt for sweets of all kind. Strawberries, blueberries, blackberries, raspberries. Berries all over his psyche.
She would wake up in the middle of the night and roll over on his chest, while her belly allowed her to. As she still was light, she wouldn't crush him so he wouldn't wake up immediately. And depending on what she wanted, she had different methods to catch his attention. She could blow on his face, tickle him, pinch his cheeks, bite his neck, nibble his lower lip.
He would crack one eye open, moan or groan depending on how she managed to disturb his holy sleep.
-What's up, Hina? would he ask with the raspy voice he had in when waking up, sliding a hand over her backbone.
-Kiba?
-Huh?
-I feel like strawberries.
He would suddenly open both of his eyes to arrow them right in her pupil less pale ones. Suspiciously, he would state that there were some in the fridge of their kitchen.
She would pout and snuggle her head in his neck, sending black hair all over his face. Her words, damped by his skin, would draw a smile in his eyes, while he did his best to frown.
-I know, but … I am scared of darkness …
He would sigh and shove her off delicately, getting up.
-Okay for this time, however, it's the last one! You've got to take care of yourself. You're not a little kid anymore.
Yet, they both knew he would get up the next night. He simply just couldn't say no to her. It was as if she controlled him. Since the day he asked for her hand, she intruded his soul, twirling herself around him and asphyxiating him as a python …
God did he love this sentiment of dependence.
It was venom crossing the trails his veins were, poisoning his mind, drowning him in the drool of his own heart. She was a spell turning him in a wandering spirit, looking for a harbour. She was everything from his childhood to his manhood, or nothing else than a lost memory attaching him to her.
She was like opium, obsessing him so only she could remain.
When he would come back with whatever she had demanded, he would find her sitting on her ankles, her upper body lightly tilted forwards, her little hands posed in between the gap of her knees, stopping her from falling asleep.
She reminded him of Akamaru when he was a puppy.
Letting her be, freeing her from all kind of cruelties she was used to, belittling words, he had awoken a new Hinata, the one that she had to be. She needed care, affection, company … and he had always been willing to give her all those things.
He would hand her the fruits, looking at her grabbing them as if they were jewels. She was so easily satisfied … well, not in all matters.
He knew she didn't love him. Still, their relationship was based on trust and a hard friendship. And it was enough for the moment. They wanted to live their lives together, get old one beside the other. Most of the time, it was easier when love wasn't implied. His sister was a good example of that theory.
Before marrying Ashi, at fifteen, five months before the septuplets' birth, she was in a relationship with Ryôshi. Since they were three have they been chasing after each other, yet one night had been enough for everything to stumble. Ryôshi made the big mistake of leaving his best friend and girlfriend with enough sake to drown an army, wanting to escape their non-stopping quarrels.
What had to happen occurred.
Before Ryôshi could even blink, Hana was married to his best friend, obliging him to be his best-friend's best man, and giving birth to SEVEN bloody brats. But their union wasn't a catastrophe like everybody had expected. Living together calmed both of them down to the point that Ashi's vocabulary didn't contain the word "anger" anymore. They were very harmonized with each other. And he didn't recall any problems in their couple. The only one to be pitied was the fop. Nyeh, nyeh, nyeh, the bad guy always gets the girl. In your face, Hyûga genius.
Sadness flooded him while glancing at her. She still was a caged bird. She was not displaying the Bunke seal, but her wings were troubled in spreading out. She maybe fled her cage, he perhaps liberated her from her chains … yet something stayed behind. It was in her head. He had seen the marks on her back, around her legs, on her ribs, around her neck, and still, she was buying flowers each Sunday and heading towards the Hyûga graveyard to pray on her father's and mother's sepulchre. He would have been just too glad to be allowed to follow her just to explode Hyûga Hiashi's tombstone and spit on his ashes.
She was too forgivable. That was maybe what he appreciated the most in her very flexible character.
However, even if she was enchained in somehow of a complex of Stockholm, there was no will in living. Actually, she was by his side, breathing, because she knew she was needed by him. Before, she didn't dare undermine her life, being aware of the fact, that her father would harm somebody else, not having her around. It was a big mistake, but she realized way too late.
Yet, her father was dead, her clan never reclaimed her, her sister refused to share her existence in her company. Who else was left to her than him? He would be there for her until death slipped between them and tore them apart. Little did he know that she would be first to depart for the Grand March.
But for how long could he stay by her side, keeping her from doing some stupid things to herself?
Strangely, since the day he refused becoming ANBU for the second time, the missions he was sent to were getting longer and more dangerous each time. Akamaru had also noticed the changes. His A-ranked assignments gave more the impression of being like S-ranked to him. Maybe was it just him getting lame …
He sneered, redirecting his attention to the petite figure cutting off in the darkness.
Hinata was so loveable, taking pleasure in eating those little red fruits. She would seize one in between her forefinger and thumb and lift it towards her pulpous minute mouth, where pearl-white teeth were awaiting to cut the strawberry in half.
There was something sadistic in the way she would lick her lips after having swallowed her piece. As if there was some blood on them, and she didn't want to lose the precious liquid before having tasted it.
As she wasn't paying attention, he rapidly snatched a berry from the porcelain bowl. It was the last one, so when she extended her arm to reach for it, she couldn't but be startled at the fact that it had disappeared.
Enjoying the view of her puzzled features, he couldn't help smirking.
-Kiba!
She pointed a pale finger on him.
-You stole my strawberry!
He chuckled, shaking his head.
-Liar!
He stuck out his tongue, replying playfully:
-Innocent until proven guilty.
And as to prove his guilt, he threw the berry and waited for it to fall in his wide open mouth.
She pouted lovely, turning her head to the side, ignoring his mocking apologies. She never had understood how dangerous it was to break a staring contest with Kiba. Or, perhaps, did she want him to jump on her and pin her on their futon, before hungrily attacking her mouth.
°°
Before they would put a finger on her problem, she would run out of their bedroom towards the washroom, and vomit her heart out.
Since it wasn't stopping, but increasing each day, offering her a day long of migraines, the thought of him being the cause of her new illness stroke his mind. After all, there were married only since seven months, so maybe was she staring to realize some disgust for him …
Her vomiting made her very feeble, and in one month did she lose de little weight she had gained during those same seven months. It wasn't as if she had melted, but she was sharper, trenchant, physically talking. She reminded him of an ANBU sword. Her skin had the same glow as the steel of a katana.
And then, one day, not at all different from any other day, he remembered how Hana had acted while pregnant of her twin daughters. She had also suffered of severe heaves of stomach, just like Hinata.
It had hit him like a tribe of infuriated wolves running after a prized prey. For those past four months, she hadn't pushed him away once! There were always those three days in a month she wouldn't want him to try anything on her (A/N yes my dears, Kiba is such a beast in bed), and he wouldn't insist, being aware of how women could get moody in that period, and after all, as kind and discreet she could be, she was a woman. But for the last four months, he didn't remember having to take a forced break. Not once. And Kami! When it was up to that, he had a very detailed and cleat memory.
"Oh, fuck!"
He didn't like and never wanted children. They were loud and clumsy, impolite and vicious. However, he remembered that he had stipulated in their verbal contract preceding their union that Hinata and him would have children. Not one kid, but children. Still, he had hoped that by a miracle he would become sterile. Not impotent though, it would have been too cruel for both of them.
-Oh, Kami!
He had let go of her hair, to pass his hand through his own rough, dark strands.
How could he have overseen something so obvious? He was so absurdly oblivious, if not dense! He couldn't blame it on Hinata. She was way too distracted to realize anything, always running in between Inuzuka puppies; diplomatic paper work for the Godaime that had almost bullied her into summarizing one by one all the papers she was sent to steel some years ago from the potentially dangerous kages; her sister and him. She truthfully had no time to think coherently. She even once tried to feed a puppy with a treaty between Sunagakure and Konohagakure, and had brought a bottle of milk back to Tsunade.
He, though, was another story! If he wasn't on stalking missions or training younger dogs, he had plenty of free time to meditate about his life, his dreams, his future, his present, his past and read books and maybe, if it wouldn't cause a contusion to his atrophied brain, review his ACTIONS.
°°
He overheard a shriek at last. It was a horrible blood-icing noise. Another followed not long after. He somehow felt attracted to them. Yet he was not willing to discover her deadened body, covered in gore, so refrained his urge to check on those cries.
Akamaru removed his head from Kiba's lap, standing up on his paws and raising his head towards the sky. He howled with respect, surprising the Inuzuka. Following his glance, Kiba caught a sinister blister on the black scarf of night. There was no moon, but Sirius still shone in his modest light.
An omen.
Never did Sirius shine without the moon to protect it like a possessive lover.
What did this prophecy mean? Death was so near, wrapping her arms around the frail silhouette that was pacing each one of his breaths. He would have to fight a force much stronger than him. Perhaps was he wrong thinking he could attack fate. Maybe Hyûga was right. Fate was death and he was Sirius trying to release the moon from the ties of night. He knew that his life with Hinata would be tracked. She was the last of those wallflowers, elegant, beautiful, spreading the most crazing scent around her. Which meant she was too precious. Was his pure worship enough to fight not only a man encaged by his feelings for her but also Death, the mistress of his lover? She was lonely in gorgeous pearl-like tears. Lonely. The last of one kind.
Could he believe that he himself was lost in her gorgeous tears? Could he realize it before they would drown together?
Hinata was ephemeral, a butterfly, a may-fly, not meant to live, just to dream … He was a straying dog, just strong enough to howl to Death to leave him a little more time with his ethereal mistress … Neji was the night, strong enough to engulf Hinata's light with one move, but not willing to harm her little fragile wings.
They were all stuck in a phantasm, a fantasy.
°°
He entered his dwelling.
He had been called in by his mother.
He didn't feel at all like going in.
He was scared, afraid, ready to flee. So frightened to find out that all those months he kissed a white, porcelain skin were nothing more than the chimera of a delusional fool.
He had known having kids would bring them bad luck. Yet, she had been so happy. Her eyes sparkled, her mouth always was pulled in a grin, a fucking Naruto-like grin, she couldn't restrain herself from humming those Nagauta (A/N traditional Japanese songs) her mother had once taught her and she remembered partially, she gave it all she got to tease him, spoil him with delicious food.
He couldn't have taken away her joy. He never would have pardoned himself if the thought had even brushed over his mind.
He stepped into his neat kitchen. It was one of an occidental style he personally disliked … like the whole house but their bedroom. However, as it had been his mother's first residence, he couldn't even dream about doing any changes, therefore he stopped complaining long ago.
Tsume was sitting by a wooden table, a cup of tea clutched by her strong hands.
Her dark eyes were blank, as if crystallised. No emotion was displayed on her regular features.
Pulling a chair out, he sat right in front of her, darting his ablaze orbs into her lifeless ones.
-We have a problem …
Her voice matched her expression, cold, almost pitiless.
-Really?!
His sarcasm didn't seem to disturb her. He noticed stains of gore all over the white tunic she was wearing to sleep. His breathing fastened as a stingy feeling installed itself in his gullet. He was so hurt, but couldn't bring himself to shred one tear.
-Hinata is actually being taken care of by Haruno-san's nurses. As we have foreseen, she lost a lot of blood, but fortunately, her sister, residing at the hospital, had agreed to donate, so there were no complications in this matter. Unfortunately, her heart flinched during the caesarean, because the only anaesthesia medicament there was at hand was morphine. Of course, adrenaline was injected, and her state seems stable. But because of those major difficulties, she will not be able to be transported to the hospital, so some nurses will install them for the next week. Gather your belongings. To not disturb those women you will be leaving with us until her health improves enough for your clumsiness will be bared again.
He was not used hearing his mother talking this way, especially about topics concerning her precious dear daughter-in-law. An unknown pain travelled from his spine to his legs. He shivered.
A door opened and closed right after.
A smallish pink-haired woman passed right before him. Her hands were covered in blood, her mouth drawn in a thin line. She seemed to be broiling dark thoughts …
°°
A pale hand clasped desperately the sleeve of his haori.
Kiba pushed it violently away, making the petite body kneeling in front of him cry out.
-Don't touch me, you wench!
He wanted her cool fingers trailing on his boiling skin. Like before. Before Hanabi's death, before the Yaken, before the betrayal.
Her misty eyes were inspecting with pain, apologetically, full of terror his being.
-I hate you!
"I love you!"
-Leave me alone forever!
"Please stay by my side."
-I don't want to have this constant image of you pathetic self in front of me!
"I need to see your smile, your pout, anything. I need to see you. I need you."
-Go fuck that Naruto or your precious Neji-nii-san! Seems like it's the only thing you're good at!
"I beg you, don't betray me again."
-You're disgusting me!
"You're my strongest obsession."
-You're so weak, it's insulting to be seen with you.
"Nobody's worth for you to bow your head."
Tears. Those same gorgeous pearl-like tears they were drowning in not so long ago. Milky ice leaking from her black eyelashes. Her full lips distorted in a grimace. He craved to kiss them. Her cheeks were flaming. He wished he could extend his hand to stroke them.
He loved her so much. That was why Hinata and Kenshi had to be removed, taken away from his sight.
He became a monster, his only presence endangering his family.
The only one tolerating him would be Akamaru, his only loyal friend. She would tell him she could bear him as well, not knowing that at night his hands were crawling up her neck, thinking what a wonderful corpse she would be. He couldn't afford killing the only good part of him, he preferred losing to another man.
She would run back to Neji and Fuyubi. Kenshi would have a brother.
He glimpsed at the four-year-old boy sitting on Akamaru's back. He never should have let Fuyubi slip away. Selling his own blood to save a clan that at the end would manage killing him.
Leaving, he could hear her scream for help.
-KKKKKKKKKKKKKKKIIIIIIIIIIIIBBBBBBBBBBBBBBAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
°°
Always those same memories he couldn't erase.
One of his women stoked his torso another played with his thighs. He pushed them both away. Women were all whores.
He took in a sharp puff of opium out of his pipe. The drogue of oblivion. He had the strange impression it didn't work as well on him as it should have. It was now almost two years he hadn't seen her and started intoxicating him to forget, and still all those memories of their skin entering in contact remained. The birth of their sons, the betrayal to each other, all those sad but happy memories were still present. Maybe was it this painting of a beautiful black-haired woman with pale eyes he had insisted an artist to do without model and that was presently hung right in front of him, or all those women with black hair, pale skin and enormous eyes he was fucking lately, that were making him go crazy. He had no idea. Knowing him it could be anything. He was already crazy.
"Indeed you are …"
A moan escaped his lips, attracting those whores he didn't even remember bringing over. Perhaps another gift from the Tsuchikage? This man truly didn't know how to offer presents.
-Fuck off before I kill you!
-Hm! Yajû-sama (A/N yajû means beast, wild animal) is mean with us! But maybe didn't he receive enough affection?
The younger lass tried to graze over a scar on his arm, but he just moved her little hand away.
-You better leave me before I get a grip on your filthy beings.
The other one chuckled, before replying sweetly:
-We'll be back tonight, just for Yajû-sama …
Why was the Tsuchikage insisting for him to have a harem? Oh, right! For the beauty with strange eyes painted on the wall of his room not to make his dear toy and personal bodyguard go completely insane.
Once the two sluts were gone, his shoulders relaxed while his mouth took in another draught of the silver steam, only cure for a broken heart.
Forget.
Forget.
Forget.
Forget her pain, your pain.
Forget the curse on both your existences.
Hinata where are you?
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Sorry it took some time to update! I am actually working on another co-written fic … and I was not supposed to write this chapter before I was finished with my part for the other … but I've got to much to do! When my partner's gonna read this chapter she's gonna chop my head off! I feel bad!
Hey! Leave me some reviews!
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