Note: this chapter contains mentions of some of the imagery we saw in the series. Nothing graphic is described. Italics indicates texting.
Chapter 7. To be titled later
Clay left Hannah's house after dinner with her parents which had been both more and less embarrassing than he thought it would be. Clay wanted to take Hannah out on a proper date but he had no experience with this. Jeff was in no condition to provide help which would have embarrassed Clay anyway. Clay swallowed his pride and resorted to asking his last resort.
"You called me for an emergency over this? And more importantly you're asking a gay guy on how to romance a girl?" Tony asked when they met up not long after Clay texted Tony saying there was something he couldn't talk about over phone or text.
"You're gay?" Clay asked incredulously.
"Um, yes," Tony replied. "I thought everybody knew."
"I don't think that's true."
"I think it's just you dude," Tony said incredulously. Clay chewed that over and then put it aside for now.
"Anyway, what do I do?" Clay asked.
"Come on!" Tony replied. "You're really asking this? You've never been on a date?"
"Not a real one," Clay admitted.
"Oh shit. So classic is always dinner and a movie but you both work at the only movie theater around. Hiking?" Tony suggested weakly. Clay looked at him as if he was crazy. "Ok, no to hiking. Mini golf? Oh, got it. Picnic. Girls love that." Seeing the skeptical look on Clay's face, Tony shrugged. "Ok, I have no idea if they do but Brad likes it. Worth a shot right? Supposed to be beautiful this weekend."
"That could work," Clay agreed. He cocked his head to one side "Who is Brad?"
"My boyfriend? Really Clay? You've met him," Tony admonished. Clay nodded as things clicked into place.
"That makes sense."
"Straight boys are so dense," Tony said, shaking his head.
"Where should we go?" Clay asked, changing the subject.
"Great view from on top of the hill at the end of Maple Drive." Tony clapped Clay on the shoulder. "You got this man." Tony got into his car and took off.
Clay pulled out his phone and texted Hannah, Hey, how are you?
His phone buzzed immediately, bout the same since I saw you an hour ago :-P. U?
Good. I was wondering if you want to hang out this weekend.
What does that mean exactly?
Do you want to go on a date? Clay sighed, she was not letting him get away with anything. With me, he added for good measure.
I assumed u meant with Ed Sheeran what does this 'date' entail?
Picnic?
Hmmm, lemme think bout it
That made him nervous. Had she changed her mind? Had he done so poorly with her parents? Clay got on his bike to ride home. By the time he got there, she'd already texted him back.
Thought bout it. When?
Sun? 2 pm?
We r working :-P Tmrw? Same time?
Sounds like a plan. Clay put away his phone. At least if it was tomorrow he wouldn't have time to get nervous.
;
Hannah let out a breath of appreciation at the view as Clay spread out the blanket.
"What gave you the idea to come here?" she asked. From the vaguely embarrassed look on Clay's face she quickly surmised, "Tony."
"Yup," he said sheepishly handing her the hummus and carrots he had picked from the grocery after what felt like hours agonizing over what to get. "I'm going to admit that, as you may have expected, I do not have much experience planning dates."
"I don't have much experience going on dates. I guess we'll muddle through this together," Hannah replied. Clay grinned and poured her a glass of iced tea he'd snagged as an afterthought. "Such a beautiful day. So glad we're outdoors."
"Definitely." They sat and enjoyed the view, the quiet comfortable at first before slowly growing awkward.
"This is silly. We've talked before and we have so many topics we've never discussed."
"Like what?"
"Rogue waves. What is up with those?"
"I know!" Clay replied with a grin. "They come out of nowhere! How does that even happen?" And somehow, magically, they talked for hours about rogue waves and then tsunamis and then Hannah's childhood trip to Japan. They talked about the only time Clay had been on an airplane (a trip to Canada when he was 10 and he'd hyperventilated the whole way) and Hannah's dream to see the aurora. Somehow it was nearing sunset and they'd talked the whole time.
They held hands as they walked down the path toward Hannah's dad's car. As they drove, tension built between them.
"Want to come in?" Clay asked nervously when they neared his house. "My parents won't be home until late."
Hannah did and she didn't. With her whole heart she wanted to want to but what if what happened before happened again? What if she freaked out? She so wanted whatever this was. She feared what Clay would think if she freaked out again. "Yes," she said before she knew what she was saying. Clay let out the breath he was holding and, reaching for her hand, led her inside.
"So this is it," he said nervously. "Want a tour?" she nodded though in truth she wasn't sure. He took her around the house, dropping the extra food in the kitchen and the blanket by the stairs to the laundry. "This is my room." Hannah nodded and they went in.
Hannah sat on his bed while he nervously pointed out random things in his room. It was Clay, she reminded herself while she laughed aloud at his stories about this picture or that poster. It was Clay.
He sat next to her on the bed and they looked at each other for a minute before they kissed. He lay her down gently. He asked her if it was ok and it was. More than ok. At some point they both lost their shirts.
And then it wasn't ok. Her breath was caught in her throat and she wanted to scream. "Stop," she whispered but barely a sound came out. "Stop!" she said louder and pushed him off.
"Did I hurt you? Are you ok?" Clay asked alarmed as Hannah began to cry in front of him. What had happened? One minute she was fine and then she wasn't, just like the previous time.
"No."
He handed her her sweater and put on his shirt. He rose to grab her a glass of water, helpless to do anything else. She had calmed down by the time he got back but her eyes were still red from crying.
"What's wrong?" he asked. "Was it something I did?"
"No," she said softly. "It's me, I'm just so messed up." She took a sip of water and he waited patiently for her to speak. "None of those things you heard were true. You're the third person I've ever kissed," she admitted. "I've never done anything beyond kissing but they grabbed me and when you…" she broke down again, the tears flowing freely as she struggled to catch her breath. He reached over to hold her but she flinched so he pulled back. Clay took her hand instead and that seemed to be ok. He rubbed show circles over her palm with his thumb.
"We should try again," Hannah said when she stopped crying.
"I don't really want to," he said. Seeing the hurt look on her face he pressed on hurriedly, "Not right now. To be honest, it's a little fast for me too. I know guys are supposed to want it and all but you're only the second girl I've kissed and I haven't really gone before second base." He shook his head at how stupid and juvenile that sounded but he didn't know how else to phrase it. "I wouldn't mind. I mea, I would like to take it slow."
"You've only kissed one girl before me?" Hannah asked incredulously. Clay blushed and looked away.
"Lori Anderson at math camp two summers ago," he said. Hannah tried to cover her grin and the beginning to laugh. "She was an algebraic genius and could quote Space Balls in its entirety."
"That's so Clay Jensen," she said between laughs.
"Yea, yea. I'm a nerd."
"No, it's sweet."
"Want to watch a movie?" he asked.
"Yes," Hannah replied, glad to break the tension on this small room and relieved at their conversation.
He lead her to the den and they watched Monty Python because he'd never seen it. They blushed through the castle scene. He put V for Vendetta because she'd never seen it. They kissed through the end. And she was fine. And it was fine. No bad memories or thoughts. They were just Hannah and Clay and that was wonderful.
Note: I have no idea how teenagers sound in texts. Full sentences for Clay and abbreviations for Hannah were a conscious decision. I also have no idea who they consider hot celebrities these days.
