Subject of today's chapter? Reviews, Flames and CCs! This NEEDS to be taught to our fanfic youths! I cannot allow for my...my...what's the word...ah...students! To know the proper...learnings of this topic!
So, first off, I'll start with reviews!
Ahh, reviews...I love them so...
What's a review? Yes, I know you probably know, but out with it! A review is like a comment people add to your stories to say good things or talk about your fanfic. They're nice, make ya happy and they're fun to count.
Appreciate every little review you get!
Sure, it might be slightly annoying to only get "Rly good chap! Plz update son!" reviews, but you still shouldn't take it for granted. Reviews do take time to write. Receiving reviews is always better then just not having any, no matter how small.
But! The huge ass, really well written reviews are fricking awesome! Filled with good compliments about how creative you were and how good your writing was makes you feel totally awesome. You gotta work for those though!
You want reviews? Give some yourself! It actually does help to review to other people, it shows you don't just ignore people. Plus, if the person you're reviewing is anything like me, they can check your stories through your name on your review and leave you one. -wink wink-
Replying to review is also good! Yeah, I don't do it enough for my own good, but I at least I try! They can be simple, just a little "Hey, thanks for reviewing!" type thing. Answer questions the reviewer asked, give them little quirks, make it fun.
Only bad things to getting reviews. Demanding them. I don't get why people would post a first chapter just to continue only for reviews?? Unless the story's kick-ass good, I'd automatically turn a story away if it has something like "OK, that waz chappie 1! i oly continue if i get 5 reviews, so R&R plz!!!!!!" (If your gonna wait for a certain amount of reviews before updating, just don't tell them -wink wink-)
Now, we get to flames. The bad reviews that people only write to make a person feel bad. To fully understand a flame, let's examine an ACTUAL flame that I actually got before! It's my first flame too, I'm SO proud ..of course, I'm censoring the naughty language for you younins...which means I'm only censoring the UBER naughty bad words. Hehehe. Anyway:
"Good Gawd. A -hahaha, they said the f word-ing piece of shit from my ass could write better than this. How old are you? Five? Six?
What the -hey look, the f word again!- is wrong with you that you think you can write a story people want to read? The only people that like this crack-out piece of shit are other inbreds like you.
Please, do the rest of humanity a favor and never, ever write anything again.
Just to make sure, maybe you should jump off a cliff.
Got it?
Good.
-name withheld-"
Well! Let's dissect and examine this flame, shall we? Well...first! They made sure to insult my writing AND maturity. That's a key part. What's a flame if nothing about your 'horrible' fanfic is in it? And I should add, maturity is overrated!!!
Then they insulted my writing again. How creative. They told me never to write again, which I say was a clever touch, then, another key part of flaming, they told me to commit suicide.
For some reason, Flamers always want their victims to die. Are they sadistic or do they just don't like us?
Usually, flamers are identified by...well...flaming you. They also usually have no fanfics, meaning that they are indeed...hypocrites!
I would like to add that you should NEVER let a flamer hurt your feelings. They're only jealous of your uber awesome writing skills! All they are ish words from someone pathetic enough to deliberately hurt someone.
No one is safe from flaming! No one is ever really safe from the various Flamers on fanfiction. If you haven't gotten your first flame...you're only slightly luckier then the ones who haven't. Really, I want everyone to get flamed really once. Besides the fact that I'm slightly evil and psychopathic, all a flame is ish a test to make you a better fanfic author. Can you really take it? What would you do, cry and get upset? That wouldn't solve anything. Get angry and reply with angry notes saying "WELL FCK YOU BITCH, UR STUPID AND U SMELL LIKE CHEESE!(wtf?)" If the flamer doesn't open it, it's just a waste. And what if they did and start a flame war? That would just suck. (PS, flame wars are when your flamer happens to have a story and you get revenge by flaming it, so your flamer flames more of your stories and drags their friends in, and you drag your friends in to flame theirs and its just a waste of time) Or! You can laugh off how stupid that person is for wasting their time on you and move on. Maybe even reply and happily joke around with it.
THAT'S THE RIGHT WAY!
And if you do get hurt, just look at the other reviews and people who like your story. What's more important? One flame or all the others?
Then, there's the CCs. It stands for Constructive Criticism, and I only used it cuz I couldn't fit that in the title! -cues where everyone laughs at this witty joke thingy-
CCs are the best. They pwn reviews and fricking kick flames' ass! Constructive Criticism is confused alot for flames, which they're not. In flames, they tell you that you fricking suck and to kill yourself before the world gets polluted more from your crapiness. CCs tell you that you either just need work and tell you how, or compliment you lightly while giving you some handy tidbits to make your stories better! (hahaha, I said tidbits...)
But, when it comes to being a hardhead and being stubborn like I am most of the time, CCs can annoy. You can totally think "Dood, what the hell does he/she know about how I fricking write?! It's my story, damn you!" Which, I admit, I've done. Bad Ayumi...
Or, there's the times when you read a CC and think that they just misread something. Like, oh, I dunno, claiming that you said every and all n00b story sucks? -glance at reviews/flames- That was a completely random example by the way, with nothing that actually has to do with real life, ehehehe...anyway, you'd read their review and it seems they're just blabbing about themselves as an author and how they want you to realize blah blah blah and you just wanna stick something very sharp and pointy up their fricking ass!...but it's okay, it's normal and you can just ignore it or reply and kindly tell them to stop whatever they're doing.
I think that wraps things up a bit...hope you learned a bit this chapter or at least had fun reading it!
As I end this, I just wanna say, thank you reviewers! I never expected to get so many already, I feel so damn lobved!!! X3 THANKS!
I FRICKING LOVE YOU ALL!!!
