Remains of the Day

Chapter 7: Broken Angel

A/N: Thanks to the reviewers! I really appreciate it! Also, I know that McKenzie was breaching medical procedure a bit by just pulling Jack out of there… but I really hate shrinks and I'm a bit of a fan of the drama (incase you didn't notice) so I decided to go for the drama stuff instead. Hope you enjoy it!

The drugs made it impossible for Jack to tell reality from dream, truth from lie, or friend from foe. He'd been laying there on the floor for almost 24 hours. He felt like it had been much longer. He couldn't move or speak. He just stared ahead. He didn't really see his room; he spent endless hours wandering the labyrinth of his mind. Some memories were good; some weren't. But, at the moment, neither mattered. He just wanted to be able to speak.

Carter walked through the door to his small room, nodding slightly to the orderly who held it open for her. Daniel and Teal'c were behind her. She looked down at Jack, and she couldn't stand seeing his beautifully soulful brown eyes so glazed and dull. There was no spark of humor or mischief in them now. They were unbelievably empty, and that emptiness chilled Carter to the bone.

The team stood there for a moment, each in his or her own thoughts. Daniel made the first move. He took a step forward and knelt on one knee to get closer to his friend.

"Jack?" he said quietly.

The older man did not respond.

"Jack, I don't know if you can hear me. I know that the drugs they give you in here are hell…we've, ah- we've been doing this whole 'mental institution' thing too much lately, haven't we?" He allowed himself a small smile that didn't quite reach his blue eyes. His expression shifted and became earnest. "We're gonna get you through this, Jack."

Despite Jack's unresponsiveness, Daniel's words of comfort for the Colonel gave Sam the courage to kneel beside her teammate. She reached out and touched Jack's shoulder. "He's right, Sir. We're going to figure this out. I've been talking to Janet; she thinks that there's something physical going on here. But, even if there isn't… Colonel, everyone has a breaking point. You've been through so much… you've seen so much… I guess I'm just trying to say that even if this isn't physical, none of us thinks any less of you. And we'll help you out of this, ok?"

Everyone has a breaking point… none of us thinks any less of you. The words were muted, distorted, and far away, but he heard them. He wanted to say something. To thank her. To tell her that she was wrong, that he was weak. To yell at her because she should know that he's stronger than that. He didn't know what he would say, he just knew that, at that moment, he would have given anything to be able to speak to her.

The team sat in silence for a long while. They didn't want to leave Jack until they were forced. Since Janet was scheduled to be at the hospital sometime that day, they knew they could probably get away with staying with him until the MRI.

Dark, scattered thoughts forced themselves on him. It was a barrage of his worst nightmares slamming into his thoughts one after another. He felt like he was under fire. His head was killing him. He was in emotional and physical agony, but he could not scream. He couldn't even force a single word out of his dried lips. All he could do was grunt and moan.

Carter and Daniel sat by their friend, and Teal'c towered above them, like a loyal century standing watch. The moans ripped each of them from their thoughts. As Jack moaned loudly, his open, unseeing eyes suddenly slammed shut and his face contorted in pain.

"Daniel, get McKenzie!" Carter ordered. Daniel didn't even have time to argue the command as Sam was already tending to Jack, trying to comfort him. She undid the straps on the straightjacket with a little help from Teal'c. Jack's arms were finally free. He brought both hands to his temples and tried to ease the pain in his head.

"Colonel, it's Carter, can you hear me?"

Jack just grunted again. Teal'c knelt at Major Carter's side in an effort to render assistance, but there was little he could do.

Sam rolled Jack onto his back and cradled his head. He had lowered his hands. The agony seemed to have subsided slightly, but he was still clearly in pain. She stroked his graying hair softly and tried to whisper words of assurance to him.

The door opened and Daniel re-entered, followed by Dr. McKenzie and, to Sam's great relief, Janet Frasier.

"He's in pain." Sam said, looking desperately to Janet for help.

"Pain? That doesn't make sense…" McKenzie said quietly.

Janet heard it, and, as she shouldered her way past the psychiatrist toward her patient, she spoke, "Still think this is psychological?" Despite her complete focus on Colonel O'Neill, or perhaps because of her focus on Colonel O'Neill, she could not keep the smugness out of her voice as she gave McKenzie a not-so-subtle I told you so.

"Colonel O'Neill, Sir? It's ok, you're going to be ok." Janet's voice was reassuring yet confident. She could manage to convey concern and care along with a strong assurance that she was in charge and nothing was going to hurt you all in one phrase. Daniel always marveled at her ability to do that, even when one of his friends was hurt. She truly was an amazing woman.

"His pulse is rapid and his respiration is shallow. We need to calm him down!" Janet ordered.

"How? I don't even know if he can hear us." Sam said.

Janet, whose hand was still on Jack's pulse, looked at Sam with a hint of surprise. "Keep talking, Sam, his pulse slowed slightly."

Sam looked uncertain but realized she didn't have much of a choice. Her CO was about to hyperventilate in her arms. "Ok… Colonel O'Neill? Can you hear me? It's Carter, Sir. We're all right here. Me, Daniel, Teal'c, and Janet. You're alright, Sir. You're safe. We're going to take you back to the SGC and you'll be better in no time, but first I need you to calm down. I know you're in pain, but please, just focus on your breathing."

Little by little, Jack's respirations slowed to a normal rate.

"Good, very good, Sir." Janet said with a relieved smile.

Much to Sam's surprise, Jack breathed out a word. "Carter?"

It was Sam's turn to smile. "Yes, Sir. I'm right here."

"Head…hurts… bad…" He forced out.

"Don't worry, Sir. We're going to head back to the SGC and I'll figure out what's causing this." Janet said, giving McKenzie a pointed look. The psychiatrist had to admit that the newest symptom did point to something physical.

"Doc?" Jack asked, his voice sounding slightly surprised.

"Yes, Sir. Didn't think you'd get away from me that easily, did you?"

A ghost of a smile played at the corners of Jack's mouth. "Wouldn't… dream of it… just, please… no needles."

Janet smiled down at the Colonel as the orderlies lifted the man onto the gurney. In less than 30 minutes, they were back at Cheyenne Mountain.

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Janet left Sam with Jack while she prepped the MRI machine.

Daniel and Teal'c went to brief General Hammond on the situation.

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"Carter…" Jack said weakly.

"Yes, Sir?" She was unashamedly holding his hand. She gave it a soft squeeze.

"I… couldn't talk…" he mumbled.

"What, Sir?"

"Couldn't say… thanks…"

Carter frowned. "Thanks for what, Sir?"

"Angel… in the night…mares… talking…" He lost the battle he'd been fighting against the sedatives still coursing through his system.

Carter just reached out and brushed a stray strand of hair from his forehead. "You're welcome, Sir."

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With Jack unconscious, it was very easy to conduct the MRI. Janet got the scans she needed and they moved Jack back to his private room without incident.

Janet walked into her office and found McKenzie waiting for her.

"Doctor." Janet nodded.

McKenzie returned the gesture. "Did the results show anything?"

Janet made her way around him to her desk. She sat, her fatigue written on her face. "I'm not sure yet," she said with a sigh, "I was just about to look them over."

McKenzie nodded understanding. "Mind if I sit in?" He asked.

"Why would I mind that?" Janet replied coldly.

McKenzie sighed, too. "We're supposed to be colleagues, Doctor Frasier."

Janet looked up at him; the anger in her eyes was very obvious. "Colleagues don't take patients away from each other, Doctor."

"That's not fair." McKenzie said softly. "I was under orders. The men who oversee this program told me to do a follow-up. After the incident 10 weeks ago, they wanted to make sure everyone was alright. When I saw how Colonel O'Neill was acting, I had to make a judgment call."

"He was my patient!" Janet all but yelled.

"Exactly. Doctor Frasier, you cannot deny that you have strong emotional ties to SG-1. Sam Carter is your best friend. I know you care deeply for Dr. Jackson-"

"-I-"

"-I'm a psychiatrist, Doctor. Your feelings for Daniel don't pass me by any more than his feelings for you. Or Major Carter's feelings for Colonel O'Neill, and Vice Versa. And, isn't Jack O'Neill your daughter's Godfather?"

"Yes, so are Daniel and Teal'c… SG-1 is her surrogate family."

"And yours." McKenzie supplied.

Janet looked up at him. "Yes." She admitted. "But I never let that get in the way of my job. If anything, it drives me to work harder when problems arise."

"Which is what happened here, Doctor. You were so determined to find something that you could cure in Jack O'Neill that you didn't even stop to consider that maybe the man had just been pushed too far. You were positive that the problem was physical."

Janet lifted the MRI results to McKenzie. She'd been glancing them over while he lectured her. "And I was right. Look, you see the increased activity in the Hippocampus and Amygdala? Those are the sections of the brain involved in memory recall. He was shot with a strangely configured energy weapon and then had his brain interfaced with a piece of alien technology. It was logical to assume the problem was physical."

"And ten weeks ago? Was it logical then to assume that the problem was physical?" McKenzie cut in.

"No, but-"

"That's my point, Doctor. You care so much about SG-1. Do you really think that you can be objective? If one of them truly developed a psychological disorder, would you call me? Or would you spend hours and days trying to find a physical explanation?"

Janet pursed her lips. "When no physical explanation could be found, then I would call you. But until then, it would be irresponsible to call you. These people are traveling to alien planets daily. They are exposed to god-knows-what. Agents that this planet's medicine knows nothing about. Tells me nothing about. But I do not let my feelings get in the way of this job. You'll find, Doctor, that whether it's Jack O'Neill in that bed or James Armstrong from accounting, I will give the same amount of energy in solving the problem."

McKenzie raised his hands in surrender. Frasier was a petite woman, but she was a force to be reckoned with. "Can you at least see how my superiors would be concerned about your objectivity?"

"Yes." Janet acquiesced. "But, I hope that you can see now that they are wrong in that concern."

McKenzie nodded. "And I will report those findings to them."

Janet nodded her thanks and left her office. She had to explain the cause to Sam and Colonel O'Neill, and then to Daniel, Teal'c, and Hammond.

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"So, what can we do?" Sam asked.

"Well, I'm going to let him rest for now. I want to do a full battery of tests tomorrow. A more comprehensive MRI and a CT scan. Right now, I'm drawing some blood for testing. I want to make sure that we're not dealing with any hidden bugs here."

Sam nodded. "So, they didn't break him? It was just the device and the weapon messing with his brain functions?" She asked.

Janet shrugged. "I don't know, Sam. Right now, the problem is being caused by messed up brain chemistry, but Colonel O'Neill has had some horrible experiences in his life."

Sam nodded again. "I know… they were projected on the wall of the cell…"

Janet sighed. "Sam, are you ok?"

Sam looked up at her. "Of course I am, Janet. The Colonel's the one who's been through hell."

Janet shook her head. "Not the only one. Sam, he suffered, but so did you. It must have been hard to watch him suffer like that."

"Of course it was hard, but…" Sam trailed off, not finishing the thought.

"But what, Sam?"

Carter sighed. "We had to be strong. All of us. For him. He was fighting so hard… we couldn't show him the effect it was having on us. It would have killed him… oh, god, Janet! It was so hard!" Sam's words caught in her throat as a sob escaped.

"Hey, hey…" Janet rushed around the bed to her friend and gave her a hug. Carter cried openly on Janet's shoulder. "Shh…. Shh… it's alright, now. You're home, and we'll get the Colonel back to normal… shh…" She continued to whisper words of comfort and rock her friend back and forth.

Unbeknownst to them, McKenzie was watching from Janet's office door. He shook his head. It would have taken me weeks to get her to open up like that… He smiled. Maybe an emotional connection to the people you work with wasn't such a bad thing. He also suddenly realized why no one on base liked or needed him. They already have counselors and therapists…

TBC…

I see the light at the end of the tunnel, but, don't worry, I promise after math and possible shippy-goodness… but, we'll see… :D