Part Seven
Two days later, I sit reading my childish Italian storybook while Edward scowls in my general direction. I studiously ignore him, translating the story as needed – mostly for his sake, might as well try to make it interesting for him – and flipping through the pages at an exaggeratedly slow pace.
"Working yet?" I ask from my chair, not sparing him a glance.
"No," he answers petulantly.
"Focus harder."
He scoffs. "What do you think I've been doing for the last three hours?"
"I don't know," I drawl, turning a page. "Basking in my glory? Marveling at my inhuman beauty? Admiring my many talents? Take your pick."
The mass of vampires floors below us act as an uneccessary distraction while we lounge in his room. Well, I lounge. He sits with his head propped up by his fists on the edge of his chair, hunched over his knees while he stares at me. Aro has pretty much left it up to me to decide what we will do, so I made the decision to force Edward into exploring his power and, more importantly, tuning people out.
It hasn't been working very well so far, but I'm not concerned. He'll get there when he gets there. For now, it means that I can enjoy my book in relative silence.
After another half hour, I sigh, putting the book down on the end table as I turn the last page and pick yet up another. Within a hundred pages, the main character is pregnant and fighting with the father over keeping the child. It's positively ridiculous.
I tip my head back over the arm of my chair and watch dust settle on my pant legs from my contorted position. My heels tap out a rhythm on the side of the chair as I roll my eyes at the absurdity of the sorry excuse for a novel that is clutched in my hands. I knew I shouldn't have bothered with the fourth installment, but god help me if I couldn't stop myself from attempting to finish the series anyway, despite the grating personality of the narrator and her chosen baby daddy.
Seriously, dude, wrap yo shit.
"Wrap yo shit," Edward repeats incredulously. "Really? For a millennia-old vampire, you know an odd assortment of slang."
"I like to keep up with the times," I sniff, returning to my book. "I do the Facebook," I mention casually.
"The Facebook?"
I toss a wry smile at him. "A joke."
"I hope so."
"Don't you have mind reading to focus on, or something?" I say as I scan the next page quickly.
"Well, it's hard not to respond to such stimulating internal discussion."
"I'm going to take that as a compliment."
Edward snorted. "I figured you would."
I observe my perfect nails, my feet dangling limply. "It's hard being this awesome – I deserve to take some credit for it."
"If awesome means reading children's books and watching soap operas, then sure."
I raise an eyebrow at him. "Don't diss the telenovela."
"Oh, I'm not." He clearly is. "It's just… surprising that a vampire of your stature would sink so low as to pine over fictional, over-dramatized characters in a TV show marketed to women."
"I have a sister," I defend.
"Not a valid reason for watching them."
I huff. "You haven't even met her. You have no idea how much time I spend with her."
"Does she watch the soap operas, too?" he teases.
"Not really," I admit.
His voice turns serious. "Where is she, anyway?"
I glance over to find him genuinely curious. "Oh," I scoff, "off somewhere tormenting some vampire coven or another. I didn't really pay attention to the specifics."
"You seem very enthralled by it all," he comments sarcastically and I shrug. "Really, though, where is she?"
I fix him with a rather severe stare. "I just told you. If you are looking for a location, I think she is in America, although I can't be sure."
"Are you telling me that she is really torturing someone, right now?"
"Why are you surprised? You're the one who can read minds, I thought this would be old news."
"Why would she be doing that?"
Honestly, I don't exactly know what she finds so appealing about the whole pain thing. She's always been a little vindictive since the witch fiasco – well, before it, too. "Aro likes to use her to intimidate people – it's an added bonus that they are more willing to follow our rules with the threat of her gift hanging over them."
"Why are these rules so important, anyway? If there are so many people who don't want to follow them, then why bother?"
"Edward, I've explained this to you already – it's for the good of the species. Humans have laws that are broken all the time and you don't see people wanting to remove most of those."
He nods, acknowledging my point.
"Now," I intone, "focus."
"I don't want to feed."
I blink, dumbfounded. I'm holding the door of his room open, waiting for him. "What are you talking about? Of course you do."
"No." He turns away from me and gazes out the window.
"Edward, denying your needs will not make you feel better."
He glares at me.
"Edward, come on down with me –"
"I said, no!" He huffs, "Now leave me alone."
I release the door and it shuts with a soft click. "I will not let you starve yourself and become a potential danger to the humans of our city."
"I already am a danger, we all are."
"No, we are not." So long as we feed.
"I told you to leave me alone."
I step toward him. "Edward –"
"Go away!" He bats away the hand I extend to him and I begin to feel the first stirrings of anger join my mild irritation at his stupidity.
"You are –" I can't even find the words to describe his idiocy. "Such a brat!" I conclude quite eloquently instead.
"I'm the brat?" He exclaims incredulously. "Take a look in the mirror!"
"I would, but I'd just see you looking right back at me!"
He splutters. "What even – you are so childish! I thought you were supposed to be the old one here."
"I am." He knows that I am touchy about my age. His hours of listening intently to my mind has shown him that much.
"Well, then act like it!"
"That's it! I did not ask for this; you are incorrigible." I begin to stalk away, intent on asking Aro to deal with Edward's unruly attitude himself. Children. My god.
"If I'm unruly, then you are beyond immature."
I whirl around. He's so unbelievably irritating! It grates on my already raw nerves. "I have just been trying to help you!"
"Well, you haven't!" He confesses angrily, pained. "Nothing can make this better!"
I suddenly feel like this is about more than just typical newborn vampire broodiness. I narrow my eyes at him.
"Yeah, you picked up on that so quickly," Edward jibes, trying to force me to react, but I know what he is really trying to do. His distractions won't work on me.
"I'm not the mind reader, here. I have my limitations, you know, I can't guess what is bothering you," I snap, perhaps more harshly than I originally intended.
He chews on that comment for a moment. "I can –" he stops, swallowing hard. "I can hear them," he insists, grasping my arm and shaking me slightly. His whole body seems to vibrate with pent up emotion.
I inhale sharply, understanding in an instant what he is alluding to. I hadn't been aware that he could hear the humans, as well. "I see."
"Do you?" he presses, gripping me tightly. "Do you really? Because I'm not sure you do see."
"Edward," I sigh, "there is a reason that I have not fed around you. Haven't you noticed that?"
He blinks and I can tell by his expression that he is trying to search my thoughts for the reason. I allow him this and he lets go of me instantly. "You do what?" It isn't a question, more an exclamation of shock. "How?"
"I don't like them suffering, either, but I don't know of another way, so I have to feed on humans. It is only right that I know the suffering that I am causing and relieve them of it. It eases their passing and demands a certain level of introspection."
"So you…you feel them die?"
I nod. "It is as real as what you hear from them, although I don't hear their thoughts. I just feel the pain and emotions I take from them – the physical things." His eyes are tight. "In a way, your situation is worse than mine."
He shakes his head. "They are both terrible." It's not meant as an attempt at comfort, that much I know, but it comes across that way.
I feel uncomfortable, not sure what to say now that the silence stretches between us.
"If you would like…" I trail off, not wanting to say it for fear that it will set him off. I think it instead, secretly hoping that he will refuse.
"No, I can't ask you to do that. I need to know the pain and fear I cause. I never would consider asking you to take that experience."
"I just thought I would offer."
"I know."
The awkward silence continues, only punctuated by the rasping wind at the window. I don't know what to do, what I can say, to make this better for him.
"It wouldn't ease my conscience, you know," he mutters suddenly, his eyes connecting with mine.
"What?" I ask, perplexed.
His expression is indecipherable, his gaze intense. His hands hold me tightly by my shoulders again. "If you cut off their senses. It wouldn't ease my conscience… because then you would just suffer instead of them."
My brows furrow and I purse my lips. "That's what I am here for, you know. My gift is useful to the Volturi because I can deprive people of their senses. I'm expected to use it as I, or the brothers, see fit."
"At the expense of your well-being."
I say nothing in response. He doesn't understand that it's my duty, I've never known another way.
"That doesn't make me feel any better about it."
"Edward, it's fine – I am not some child to be protected. I know what I am doing and do it willingly."
Suddenly, he crushes me to his chest, his newborn strength almost painful as my face presses into his shirt and his arms wrap around me. I don't know what to make of the foreign touch and my hands hang awkwardly by my sides. I can't remember being… hugged – ever. Not like this. Jane sometimes lightly embraces me, but it is over practically before it begins. Aro occasionally sweeps me toward him, but that is different than this. This is… intimate.
His hand wanders into my hair, stroking my scalp and cutting off my previous thoughts. It is… pleasant, I suppose, the tickling feeling of his fingers in my hair. He sighs against me and my arms still hang limply, as I am unsure of what I should be doing with them. His other arm is tight across my upper back, holding me to him, and his chest rumbles as he speaks. "I know you're not a child," he says lowly, but something is going unsaid; his tight embrace proves this.
I blink once, his scent invading my nose as I stare out the window at the city in the distance. He smells sweet and musky at the same time, an odd yet appealing combination on him. I finally pat his shoulder awkwardly, my body stiff.
His frame shudders against mine before he pulls away, turning so that I can only see his back. The muscles there ripple as he rolls his shoulders, stretching unnecessarily. "Okay," he whispers, almost to himself. "I'll be down in a minute, just let me change into something that I don't mind ruining."
I bite my lip, wary of leaving him alone, but glide out the door and close it with a soft click.
