Double Time

The floor felt cold against Thor's cheek. Pain throbbed through his skull, pulsing outward from the back of his head. Blood trickled down his neck, warm and sticky, and the hallway tilted at irregular angles as Thor groaned and pushed himself into a sit, leaning against the wall and swallowing down nausea.

Something was not right, he knew distantly. There were shouts and the blur of movement in front of him, and when he looked up, it was to realize that he was seeing double.

"Loki?" he grunted. A pair of identical pale faces wearing identical helmets glanced down at him before turning back to glare at each other.

Wait... if he was seeing double, they should be looking in the same direction, right?

His head hurt.

"I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered," said the Loki on the left, the one standing closest to him. Had Loki summoned one of his clones? Thor squinted at both faces and realized that the one on the right had smoother skin, a straighter nose, and brighter eyes. Was that the clone, or was Loki messing with his head again? "I can understand wanting to look like me, but this is a bit much."

"What are you talking about?" snapped the Loki on the right. "I'm the one who should be suing you for copyright infringement!"

"...what does that even mean?"

"What in Hel's name is going on?" Thor growled. He was already feeling dizzy without Loki arguing with himself.

"He's an Ultimus!" both Lokis said at once, with identical voices, identical looks of indignation, and identical fingers pointing accusingly at the other.

Thor blinked, once, twice. "Huh?" he grunted. "Ultimi don't even have faces, let alone yours."

Both Lokis stared at him like he had the IQ of a gnat before face-palming simultaneously.

"They're shapeshifters, Thor," said the Loki on the left. He eyed the other Loki suspiciously as he spoke. "The blank faces act as an 'empty slate', as it were."

Something clicked into place in the back of Thor's mind, but a white-hot throb of pain sent any intelligent thoughts skittering away. He closed his eyes against a wave of dizziness and tried to will his head into healing faster.

There was a sound like a low hum that he could feel in his bones, and, even with his eyes closed, Thor could see the flash of light through his eyelids. He looked up, eyes wide, and the air simmered with the charge of magic, wavering like heat rising off pavement. He looked at the Loki on his left, who was now a few yards away, rising from the ground with a pained grunt. Smoke rose from charred holes in his cloak.

When Thor turned to the other Loki, he saw the image of his brother flicker. For the tiniest fraction of a second, Thor saw the faceless visage underneath, the pale slab of flesh, and he was on his feet with Mjolnir in his hand and a roar on his lips before he could even consider what this meant.

Green eyes wide in surprise filled his vision, and Mjolnir connected with a crack of bones and the crackle of thunder.

Thor wobbled dizzily for a moment, but when the red haze of anger and pain subsided, he found that he could see more clearly. He put a hand to the back of his head and discovered that the wound had closed over, and he breathed a prayer of thanks for his advanced, Asgardian healing.

The Ultimus posing as Loki was now imbedded in the far wall, and there were skid marks in the floor like twin furrows. The creature now actually looked like an Ultimus – one of the newer models Dr. Sven had been working on – except that its blank, slab-like face had a Mjolnir-shaped dent, revealing cogs and wires damaged beyond repair. Its fingers twitched a few times before falling limp.

"Well," the other Loki said wryly, "that was certainly... decisive."

Thor turned to regard his brother, who was rubbing his shoulder and smiling through a wince. Thor eyed this second Loki, keeping Mjolnir ready in case this was another Ultimus trick.

"You saved my life," Thor said, only realizing it as he spoke the words. He had turned his back to an Ultimus, whom he had mistaken for Loki and who likely had all sorts of dastardly things planned. This other Loki, real or not, had defended him. Thor relaxed his white-knuckled grip on Mjolnir, expression softening.

Loki grimaced as though he had just eaten something foul, expressive eyes looking everywhere but at his brother. "Yes, yes, I know. Heroics are not my thing."

He looked thoughtfully at Thor for a long moment before shrugging and backhanding his brother across the face.

Thor's ears rang. "Ow!" he shrieked, cupping his smarting jaw. "What was that for?"

"Mm, yes. That's better," Loki said, smirking and shaking out his sore hand. "I feel much more villainous now. Shall we proceed?"

Well. The person before him was certainly acting like Loki, but then again so had the Ultimus.


The brothers trotted side by side in the direction of Tony's chambers. Loki was careful to keep his expression casual, bored even, while reaching for his magic just in case. He knew this was the real Thor since he had all those little imperfections that the Ultimi seemed to miss and since he could sense no magic around the familiar face, but Thor could not sense magic the way that he could.

"So," Thor sighed, "in addition to everything else, the Ultimi are shapeshifters as well?" He was still eyeing Loki suspiciously, and the Trickster sighed, wishing he had been this leery a few minutes ago when it had counted. Loki was not about to resurrect his sorry ass if Thor decided to die on him like that, after all.

"Yes," Loki answered tersely. "And exceptionally good mimics. How do you think Abaddon captured me in the first place?"

One of these days, he would not stumble over that name.

Thor frowned at his brother, brows knit in thought. "What form did Abaddon take?"

Images of Abaddon wearing Thor's face flashed through Loki's mind. The Ultimus had exaggerated the coloring, making the blue eyes bluer and the blonde hair blonder, and the outline of the face had been slightly blurred, like an apparition.

"Never you mind," Loki snapped, lengthening his stride to pull ahead of his brother. How had Abaddon known his weakness in the first place?

"Wait," Thor growled. He grabbed Loki by the shoulder and spun him about, glaring through narrowed eyes. "How do I even know you're the real Loki? Tell me something only my brother would know."

Loki blew out a heavy sigh and rolled his eyes. He supposed this was unavoidable. "I was impregnated by a horse?" he tried, shrugging.

Thor shook his head, dissatisfied. "No, everyone knows that."

"I, er... okay." Loki decided he would be insulted by that later. "How about that one time I made you wear a dress?" He smirked. "Or does everyone already know that?"

"They do now."

The brothers glanced over their shoulders to find a flustered-looking Tony approaching them, eyes wild and dark hair askew.

"Hello," Loki said brightly. Tony looked askance at his too-wide smile.

"Anyone know what the heck is going on?" the human groused.

"There are Ultimi in the mansion," Thor informed him. "And apparently they have the ability to shapeshift."

"Ah," Tony replied, brow smoothing over in wake of this revelation. "Well, that explains why Steve..." He stopped short, eyes widening before he looked away sheepishly. "Never mind."

Loki arched an eyebrow, but Thor cut off any snide remark he could have made.

"Wait!" He pointed Mjolnir threateningly at his friend, who stared at him with wide eyes. "How do we know you're the real Tony?"

Tony looked at him like he was crazy, only to shake his head and say, "Um, well, Tuesday night I had a dream I wearing green spandex?"

Loki glanced at Thor who shrugged and nodded, easing his stance and lowering Mjolnir.

"Spandex, huh?" Loki teased, smirking and arching an eyebrow. "Green is so not your color."

Tony glowered at him. "You think you have a monopoly on green?" he snarked, gesturing vaguely at Loki's armor. "At least I could pull off the spandex."

Loki huffed and rolled his eyes as Tony began flexing, nodding admiringly at his own muscles.

Humans.

"Wait," Tony said, freezing mid-flex. "Couldn't you just have used magic to figure out if I'm me?"

"Well, yes," Loki replied, "but what's the fun in that?"

"Speaking of which," Thor said, spinning on Loki and raising Mjolnir again. "How do we know you're the real Loki?"

The Trickster rolled his eyes. "Please," he deadpanned, crossing his arms and glaring.

"Don't know if he's Loki," Tony said, "but he's certainly an asshole. Oh wait, those two are synonymous, aren't they?"

Loki sneered.

"Personality is not enough," Thor said, blue eyes boring into his brother. "The last Ultimus provided a good semblance of Loki's dialogue."

"That's because one Ultimus has a higher IQ than all the Avengers collectively."

"Hey, now," Tony grumbled. "I might start to feel... vengeful or something."

"Don't get your iron knickers in a twist."

Tony looked at Thor, who let out a long-suffering sigh. "Well, I'm convinced," Tony said, "if only because the idea of there being more of this is too frightening to consider."

Loki bit back a smirk. He considered conjuring an army of doubles, only to decide against it. "It's a shame the Ultimi can use magic," he said with a shrug. "Because then I could prove myself by turning the idiot mortal into a sheep."

"Hey!"

"A sheep with green spandex?"

"Loki," Thor groused. "Quiet."

Loki rolled his eyes – it was becoming a habit among these humans – and threw up his hands. "Fine, fine! Ask me something no one else would know, then."

Thor blinked at Loki for a long moment, frowning, as he considered what to ask. Loki held his breath, hoping that he wouldn't bring up anything embarrassingly personal.

"What," Thor said slowly, "did you get me for my fifteenth birthday?"

Loki stared blankly at his brother for a moment before laughing and saying, "A snake." He snickered at the crazy look Tony gave him.

"You got your brother a snake for his birthday?" he asked.

"What?" Loki said innocently. "It's what he wanted!"

"In all fairness, I had wanted a snake," Thor sighed. "I just wasn't expecting an Anaconda!"

"You should have specified."

Tony groaned and wiped his hand over his face. "Thank God I'm an only child," he grumbled.

"Mm, I agree," Loki replied, "Your genes should not be duplicated. I pray you never procreate."

"Aw," Tony sneered. "But I was going to make you the godfather." He paused to consider his own words, which suddenly struck him as funny if his snort of laughter were anything to go by. "Heh, get it? Godfather?"

Loki sighed melodramatically. "And while you waste oxygen on bad puns, the Ultimi are likely decimating your home. It's a wonder you humans aren't extinct yet."

"Oh, right. Crap!"

Tony took off down the hall at a sprint, his trademark armor unfurling and wrapping around him like a red and gold exoskeleton. Thor followed, cape billowing regally and nearly smacking Loki in the face. Loki sighed and followed at a more measured pace, taking a mental inventory of his more lethal spells and pushing his fear – his wariness, rather – of the Ultimi into the far corners of his mind, where he could deal with or ignore it on his own schedule.


A/N: a bit more dialogue-heavy than I meant it to be. Expect more action and craziness up next... once I work out what I'm doing. xD

Thank you all for the wonderful comments! They always brighten my day. ^_^