Thanks, everyone, for all the great reviews. Honestly, they're overwhelmingly optimistic, which is somewhat scary, but that's good news. It means I'll have to stay on my toes. I hope I'm able to meet all of your expectations. Sorry if this chapter is a bit of a short one.
Heaven Forbid
The door opened in near silence but Ponyboy looked up and saw Johnny there and turned away, half because he wanted to sleep and half because he was still a bit angry with him for having left him alone to tell his brothers what had happened. By the look on his face, Johnny had heard the noise in the kitchen and sat down next to Pony's head on the couch.
Ponyboy put out his cigarette in the ashtray he had kept underneath the couch and immediately felt like the tremors running through his stomach were going to make him sick. Johnny seemed to notice for he slid underneath the younger boy, pulling his head into his own lap. Pony turned to look at him with sorrow as he felt his hair being gently stroked, and saw a matching expression of unhappiness on his friend's face.
The action made him sad. He wasn't sure if Johnny had known how his mother had used to do that same thing for him when he was upset when she had still been alive. It was an innocent gesture, meant with the best of intentions, but the similarity upset him, and he had to turn away, caught between wanting Johnny to continue and the tears that were coursing down his face. He wanted more than anything for his mother to be alive just then to make this easier for him. To pull him into her lap and let him cry. To provide him the comfort only a mother can offer without the uneasiness that he was being a child, because he had been hurt in a terrible way and he deserved his mother.
It struck him that this was actually the first time he'd really missed his parents. He'd of course always wished that they hadn't died, but now he actually felt miserable because he knew he'd never see his mom again and he longed for her presence. 8 months she had been dead for and it was just now starting to really affect him. The same went for his father, however it was truly his mother he wanted for right then.
"Pony?" Johnny said quietly, and he knew his friend had seen the tears. He turned to face him, not feeling like hiding it just then. Pony could distantly hear footsteps and thought maybe Darry was putting Soda to bed and wishing he could have the same done for him. Just then he noticed something. Johnny had a bruise forming around his eye. One that hadn't been there earlier.
"Johnny, will you stay here again tonight?" Ponyboy asked him and Johnny seemed somewhat relieved and told him yes if Darry said it would be ok. Pony had a feeling he wasn't going to school in the morning and knew Johnny wouldn't mind cutting to keep him company. He wouldn't make him sleep in the small cramped bed again that night with him and his brother. If anything he wished he could sleep on the couch instead of anywhere near other people. Johnny continued to stroke his hair, touching his jaw lightly where he'd been struck the previous night. The bruise that had formed had been as big as any he'd ever had before.
"I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but everything will get better eventually." Johnny told him, but he couldn't take the words seriously. Everyone said stuff like that when something bad happened. He must have heard it a million times when his parents died.
"Did it get better for you?" Pony asked and Johnny flinched, probably unused to having anyone else know about what happened.
Johnny tried to meet his eyes, but Pony wouldn't allow it. He didn't feel right looking into Johnny's eyes. They held something that he was beginning to identify with, and not in a good way. Johnny had terrible things happened to him all his life and it took its toll on him. The bruises and scars would fade but those eyes knew everything that had ever happened to him, and they showed the suspicion and sorrow that had come to build up because of it. Even knowing what the older boy had gone through, Pony still felt like Johnny had kept a goodness about him that was better than what he had left of himself.
"Yeah… It got better for me." Johnny told him and because Ponyboy was avoiding his eyes he couldn't tell whether or not the boy was lying. Somehow he doubted it. "You all got me through it."
"Was it those boys from the movie?" Pony asked hesitantly. "The boy with the rings?"
Johnny turned his head and removed any contact he had with Ponyboy's head without taking it off his lap, as though he was afraid of tainting him with something.
"No… it was another boy." He confessed and Pony knew better than to push him further than he would go. Sitting up, he leaned his upper body against his friend's side and wished he could fall asleep right there. The weariness he felt from the exhausting ordeal he'd been through felt as though it was crushing him. Gravity felt denser than normal and Pony felt the stress on his body. He felt Johnny's head lean against his tiredly as well.
Darry came back into the room silently. He was watching the two with a small sad smile on his face. "Pony… you hungry at all?"
Without opening his eyes he shook his head and he felt Johnny's arm curl around his lower back and enjoyed the warmth it seemed to give him. "Do you want to go to bed?" Darry asked quietly. He nodded, but was somewhat reluctant to do part with Johnny so soon. Johnny was warm and small and he hated to think it, but Johnny couldn't be construed as a threat like either of his brothers could. Johnny wouldn't ask him any questions that he didn't want to answer like Soda would. He knew exactly what to do and how to act and Pony appreciated it more than words could say.
"You want to stay out here tonight Pony?" Darry finally asked, and by this point he was nearly half asleep, but managed to give half a nod. He could hear Darry and Johnny talking in low voices before he felt his position shift to lying down with his head against Johnny's chest. Darry removed his shoes and his legs were placed on the couch. He felt a light presence fall over him and knew Darry had thrown a blanket over him. He passed out only after wrapping his arms around Johnny's waist and letting his breath fall into sync with his friend's.
A/N: I do hate to end it so quickly, but it seemed to fit, and I'm sticking with it. I'd love some reviews at this point. I failed my driver's test and I'm a bit down right now. Positive feedback always has a way of cheering me up. Next chapter will be longer, I promise.
