A/N: So I finally got Season 6 of The Hardy Show yesterday. It's pretty epic. Shannon's pretty handsome - especially in the intoductions. :D Go order it!
I woke up the next day much more rested. It was like I had slept on a cloud - my back didn't hurt, my brain wasn't reeling, and my heart was calm and thumping rhythmically. I felt perfectly at ease, and I reveled in it, sprawled across my bed with my eyes closed, enjoying the utter calm that had washed over me.
Darcy Lunghino. What a great name. What a great name for an even greater girl.
I threw back the covers and headed downstairs to do some cardio. It really helped me wake up, because by the time I got into the shower, I noticed it was only eleven, but it felt like I had been up for hours.
Someone knocked on my bedroom door, just as I had emerged from a steam-filled bathroom. I pushed my hair back, holding the towel around my waist as I padded over, opening it.
Jill widened her eyes. "Oh. Sorry."
"Sure you are," I said, with a smile. When she didn't smile back, I furrowed my brow. "What's the matter?"
"Did you see Jeff last night?"
I thought back, shaking my head. "No. I don't think so."
"Oh. Okay."
I grabbed at her wrist when she turned to go. "Why?"
"Because he's... " She looked down the hallway, sighing. "He's not in our room."
"Oh. Well... " I stepped out, feeling the cold air lick at my wet ankles. "Did you check the rest of the house?"
She shook her head. "No, I just got up."
"Well, maybe you should look around before you get all worked up."
She jerked her hand away, glaring at me. "You don't have to be fuckin' asshole about it, Matt!"
"I wasn't!" I moved back, hand raised in innocence. "Seriously. I wasn't. I just don't want you freakin' out."
"I'm not freakin' out!" she yelled, stomping down the hallway.
I frowned at her, watching her disappear into the kitchen. Fucking hormones. They really had her going wild. One minute she could be upset about something as stupid as a TV show, and the next she'd be ripping up the couch pillows faster than Lucas ever could. And it'd be over something like... the fucking weather! It was absolutely ridiculous, but who could blame her? She was pregnant - she had a right.
Or, at least, that's what she'd been telling us.
I closed my door and headed back into the bathroom, walking right into my closet. I couldn't really decide on what to wear, so I just grabbed some jeans and t-shirt, tugging them on before I pulled my hair back into a ponytail.
She didn't scream until I opened my door again. And when she did, I nearly had a damn heart attack.
"Matt!"
She didn't sound upset, just extremely pissed off. My heart slowed a bit. At least Jeff wasn't dead.
But from the look on her face, I knew he would be.
"What's the matter?" I asked casually.
She held up a clear bottle. "What's this?"
I blinked. "I'm... not too sure."
"Me neither! You know why?"
"Haven't a clue."
"Because this! This!" She struggled for words, finally turning and chucking the bottle at Jeff's sleeping head. He groaned and rolled over. "This fuckin' asshole drank it all last night!"
I caught myself before I laughed. "He... He drank it all?"
"This isn't funny, Matt!" She stormed over to where Jeff was, sprawled half on, half off the couch, his mouth open against the pillow. She bashed the back of his head with her palm. "Hey! Wake up, asshole!"
Jeff snarled, batting her hand away. "Fuck... What? What's the matter?" He shot up, feet planted on the ground. "Are you havin' the baby?"
She slapped him straight across the face, and since he didn't see it coming, he flipped over, falling back against the couch again. "How could you drink an entire bottle of Vodka, Jeffrey Nero!?"
Uh oh. When she used his full name, I knew he was dead.
She slapped him again. "How could you fuckin' do that, Jeff?"
"I put it in my mouth and let it slip down my throat."
I saw her fist clench. "Jeff, watch it. She's gonna punch you."
He stood up. "Maybe she should. Then I might get my sight back."
As he turned to walk away, Jill grabbed his elbow, throwing him onto the cushions. "You're already fuckin' blind! Do you think bein' drunk's gonna improve the rest of your senses? You dumb shit!"
"I didn't go anywhere, Jill. I stayed on the couch and listened to the TV and fell asleep with half a bottle left. I didn't drink it all."
"Don't you fuckin' lie to meet, Jeffrey - "
Jeff bent down and began pawing the carpet, stopping at one particular place. "Feel right here."
"I can't bend, Jeff. Do you want me to kill this thing?"
"Touch it with your foot, then."
Jill narrowed his eyes at him, then sighed angrily and pulled her foot out of the little slipper flats she was wearing, touching her big toe to the designated area. Her brow furrowed. "It's wet."
"Which means I must've dropped the bottle when I fell asleep." Jeff stood up. "Can I go to bed now? Sleepin' on a couch isn't exactly comfortable."
Jill blushed and looked away. "Sure."
"Thanks a bunch." Jeff turned and started toward the bedroom, but Jill grabbed his hand, pulling him back.
"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I was just - "
"I'm sure you are." He tugged his arm away, going on with his business. He bumped into me on the way to his bedroom, stumbling past. "Sorry."
I nodded. "It's all right, man."
The door slammed a couple of seconds later.
I turned to Jill just as she took the empty bottle in her hands, staring at it menacingly. She threw it, hissing out a breath. "I fucked up," she whispered.
I shrugged. "Happens to the best of us."
"I was just... " She groaned and covered her face with her fingers. "I was just so worried about him."
"Then go tell him that."
"I tried. He wouldn't let me finish."
"Well, try again."
"I... " She dropped her arms, looking at me hopefully. "Will you? Come with me, I mean. He seems to listen to you a helluva lot more than he does me."
I grimaced. "Jill, I don't - "
The house phone started trilling, sending us both out of our skins. I never realized how quiet it was before.
"You should probably get that," she said tiredly.
I nodded, picking up the receiver and clicking the talk button. "Hello?"
"Hardy?"
I swear to God, the second I heard her voice, a ray of sunshine broke through the windowpanes. "Darcy. How's it going?"
The was a lot of static, like she was outside. "Listen. I'm on my lunch break right now, and I'm really bored."
I smiled, leaning against the counter. "Uh huh."
"And... Jesus, I sound stupid asking you this but... Wanna have lunch with me? I have nothing to do for an hour and I just figured that I should get to know you better before that Halloween gimmick of yours."
Jill was looking at me like I had suddenly contracted a contagious plague, but that was probably because of the dumb look on my face. "Absolutely. Where are you?"
"At the school. You could meet me here and then we could - "
"I'll come pick you up."
"No, no, I don't want you - "
"No, it's on me. I'll come get you."
She sighed angrily. "Hardy, I don't want you to. I want you to meet me here and then we'll take separate cars to a little... cafe or something."
I snorted. "You're plannin' on goin' to a cafe?"
"Yes. Why?"
"No reason."
"Well, that or Starbucks. Look, fuck it. I just need a place that has an outdoor area where I can smoke."
"You actually hungry for food?"
"No."
"Then Starbucks it is!"
"Good, fine. Whatever. Just meet me at the school, okay? And don't be late - I have to be back in time for a class."
"Yes, ma'am."
She hung up.
I pressed the end button, that stupid grin still on my face, and put the phone on the counter slowly.
"Who was that?" Jill asked, her mouth open in a disgusted sneer.
I looked at her, eyes dazed. "Darcy."
"Oh, Jesus Christ." She went past the kitchen, stopping in the hallway. "You really like her, Matt?"
I shrugged. "I guess."
She frowned. "You're not gonna start actin' like Shannon, are you?"
"What do you mean?"
"Lovesick."
I laughed, holding my stomach. "No, I'm not gonna start actin' like that. You know me, Jill."
"Thought I knew Shannon, too. Then that bitch came into his life - "
"Hey, hey. I thought you liked Kyle now?"
Jill clenched her fists, like she was shaking someone. Then she pointed down the hall. "I'll never like Kyle. After what she turned Jeff into."
"He seems to be becomin' himself again."
"What, a drunk?" She stormed away. "Yeah. Thank fuckin' God Jeff's becomin' himself again!"
I wanted to remind her that she was supposed to apologize to Jeff, but decided against it. There was no way I was getting in the middle of this, especially with Jill's raging emotions.
I listened, hearing the door open. She started on him the second the knob cracked against the wall. I could hear Jeff throw back whatever she was spitting at him. He wasn't backing down, not this time. And frankly, I couldn't blame him.
I winced when I heard something crash, picking up my keys quickly.
Thank God I was getting out of here.
A/N: MEHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I'm feelin' a bit ill. Review.
