Nightmare
I watched as I took out person after person, friend or foe. Their crimson blood soaked the battlefield and added to my guilty conscious. I tried to stop myself. I tried to scream at them to stop me or run away, but I couldn't. I was only a bystander in my own body, watching as I wreaked havoc wherever I was. I was suffocating in misery as I took out the people I considered family, their cries and desperate pleas falling on deaf ears.
I was trapped, forced to watch all my loved ones die by my own hands. I couldn't tear my eyes away. As much as I cried, my eyes stayed glued to the horrific scene that played out before me.
"No…"I whimpered.
Tears streamed down my cheeks as blonde hair came into my line of sight and I saw her standing there with that brilliant smile that seemed to be plastered onto her face. She was talking. Her words made no sense to me, it was muffled. She held her arms open, letting down her guard. I ran forward. This couldn't… I wouldn't let it happen. I kept running and running, trying to get to her. She was shaking but she didn't give thought to her fear.
I ran faster. I needed to save her but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't make it. I was powerless. The blood of my comrades stained my hands and I reached towards her, my scaled hand gripping her throat and lifting her in the air.
"Lucy!"
I awoke covered in sweat and short of breath. My whole body shook as I recalled the nightmare that plagued my sleep.
"Lucy, Lucy..." I murmured her name over and over. The guilt that had made itself a home in my heart clawed at my brain. Whispering and reminding me of the memory that I wished to suppress. I could still see her smiling face and hear the screams of my family. They haunted me, surrounded me.
I let out a roar, which reminded me of what I was… What I had become. Tears rolled down my face and fell onto the cave floor. The hands that were still stained with their blood trembled in front of me. The long talons that I had I used to murder them right in front of me.
"If only I had been stronger…" I choked out a sob as I curled up on the cold ground, "If only I could have overcome this." I hugged myself as I lay there, praying for death and my claws piercing my flesh as I punished myself for what I had done. The guilt tearing me up inside as I tore my skin open. The blood poured from my wounds and the harsh wind blew into the cave. I wept in my misery as I remembered each face, the one's that I had held closest to my heart. I just wasn't strong enough. I'd never be enough.
"I'm sorry."
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