Hey dudes! It's chapter 7! And I finally was able to save a snack for you! CANDY CORN!!! Eat up and enjoy!
Chapter 7: From Pink to Porker Castle
Super Fist of the Nose Hair! Oh whoops, that wasn't in quotation marks. Lemme try again.
"Super Fist of the Nose Hair! Mindless Recap!" said Bo-bobo as he got ready to take over as the narrator...hey wait a minute!!
"All right, here's how it goes. In the last 6 chapters, Don Patch had a dream, fought some limes, met an old geezer, fought a samarai, hiked through the woods, and fought a ghost all before dinner time! Now he has to fight, well, another ghost. But there's no way he can defeat me and become King of Wiggin Specialists! I remember the first time we met...His churro wiggin skills weren't bad, but in the end I pummeled him with my chili pepper allergy! Nothing can defeat the awesome power of chili! Eat chili!!"
Bo-bobo pulled out a giant Chili Pepper and whacked Dengaku Man with it. "This is for interfering!" Bo stopped for a few seconds, then hit Ghosty Gabby with it. "This is for hating Dengaku Man!" ("But you just smacked Dengaku Man!" said Beauty) then after another second or two whacked Jelly Jiggler who was suddenly there. "And this is because I don't like you!"
Suddenly the chili pepper turned purple and sprouted arms and legs. This transformation made him look exactly like King Nose Hair. "Hola, peeps!" he said. "I just flew in from Cinqcinatti and boy are my legs tired!"
"There is no Q in Cincinatti you twit!" said Beauty.
"Have a taste of my royal Nose Hair Soup!" said King as he approached Gabby. He held up a bowl of purple soup with black hairs.
"I don't think this is safe to eat," said Gabby. But King shoved the bowl in her mouth. Two thousand explosions later...
"Ow." said Gabby. "You're not doing a single thing!" she said to Don Patch, who was just standing there. A wind blew and Don fell over. He was just a cardboard cutout! Then Bo-bobo, King Nose Hair, and Dengaku Man all unzipped their costumes to reveal Don Patch, Phantom Sword and Santa Claus (in that order!).
"Eh, that's enough," said Gabby. "I'll show you how ghosts handle things!" She grew about ten times bigger. "Ghostly Gamma Ray!" She emitted a bright light that burned everybody. Or at least she thought it did. Everyone was instead frozen into solid ice!
"Ice Burst!" said Don. The shards of ice flung out and stabbed Gabby all over the place. "Ugh!" she said.
"You seem to be pooped out," said Don.
"But we're just getting started," said Sword.
"And now we'll give you a dose of ho-ho-holiday spirit!" said Santa.
"United Friendship Fist!" they all said. "Shiny Christmas Patched-up Battle Suit!"
Phantom Sword hopped into Santa Claus's hand, and he became a brilliant mix of red, green, and white. Don Patch transformed into some spiky full body armor that encased Santa. They had united to become...
...a blender?!?
"What the heck?!?" said Beauty. "That doesn't look like a battle suit at all!"
"Blender Blending Attack!" said the blender in all three of the heroes' voices. Gabby was forced into the blender and tossed around in it. After it was done, she popped out all messed up looking.
"Uuuugh...ooohohh..." she groaned, all tired out.
"Let's finish this!" said Don. "haaaaahh...HAAAAAAHH...BLAAAAH!" He shot a large beam out of his fist. After the smoke cleared, Gabby was left sitting there and smoking.
"Hey! This is the non-smoking section! Either pack it up or hightail it out!" said Don.
"You've defeated me with such ease," said Gabby. "For defeating me, I present to you this." She handed Don a ghostly cloak. "You can use this cloak to hover over harmful terrain, not to mention conveyor belts, et cetera."
"Man, that battle was easy!" said Don. "At this rate I'll beat all eight of you by the end of tomorrow!"
"Yeah sure," said Gabby. "You will find the next Wiggin Trainer in a place called King Porker's Castle."
"So is this King Porker guy the next Trainer?" said Sword.
"You will see..." said Gabby as she disappeared. "Farewell..."
As soon as the two turned around, another ghost appeared in front of them. But this one wasn't new. It was Ghosty Gus again!
"You again?" said Sword. "I thought we took care of you back at the manor! Cmon guys, we can take him again!"
"Actually..." said Gus, "I'm not here to fight you. I wanted to..."
"What?" said Don.
"...well...uh...join you. I saw the way you handled my sister back there and thought 'Man, if these guys can level off a ghost like her, I wonder what it would be like if they were to teach me their ways?' so can I come with you so I may become a powerful ghost like you, well not that you're ghosts, but powerful. Pleeeease?"
"Yeah right, there's no way we're gonna-" but Sword was cut off by Don.
"Ok, sure!"
"Welcome, ho!" said Santa.
"Ugh," said Sword. "I'm not sure about this guy..." But they had ignored him and left without him. "ARGH! Not again!"
With Ghosty Gus now in their arsenal, the four buds returned to the town and found a castle off in the distance. Surrounding it were conveyor belts that definately prevented crossover. Outside was a young woman, probably in her teens, softly sobbing.
"What's wrong?" said Don Patch.
"Oh Romeo! Where art thou?" said the girl.
"Romeo...?" said Sword.
"Yes...sob...an evil dragon captured him and they won't give him back..."
"Well, I bet we could help!" said Gus.
"You really would?" said who was probably Juliet, cheering up some.
"Sure!" said Don. "I know what it's like to lose a loved one..." he said, now looking female.
"AAAIIYH!! IT BURNS!!" said Sword, turning away from Don. Gus and Santa lifted a large pot of water and dumped it in Don's head. He looked normal again.
"Hey, what did ya do that for?" said Don. "My public loves it when I do that!"
The camera zooms out and shows the characters on a stage, and there is an audience. The audience is booing loudly and throwing various fruits, vegetables, and paper airplanes. Very soon, Don Patch was buried in a pile of them.
"Just ignore him," said Sword. "Now, can you tell us where this dragon escaped to?"
"You can find him in the tallest room in the highest tower," said Juliet.
"Uh, right, sure."
Now, to cross the conveyor belts and get to the castle...
Phantom Sword and Ghosty Gus simply floated over the conveyor belts. Don Patch put on the ghostly cloak and hovered over it. Santa inflated himself like a balloon and also floated over it. They entered the castle and saw a line of guards and a pig with a crown sitting on a throne, chowing down on a large barbeque rib.
"Who dares interrupt my eating?" boomed King Porker. "I outta have you sent to the dungeon!!"
"We're looking for Romeo and some dragon," said Sword. "Have you seen them?"
"No I haven't! Now go away!"
But then Gus noticed something about one of the guards.
"Hey, how come you're not stepping with anyone else?" said Gus. The guard's stepping pattern was slightly opposite.
"Do you really have the right to know that?" said the guard in a strange, deep voice.
"Yes, and also to do this!" said Phantom Sword as he sliced through the armor he was wearing revealing a rather small green dragon. The dragon looked around hastily and fled upstairs.
"Who was that?" said Porker.
"Must be our Romeo Thief!" said Don. "After him!"
Sword: OOH! This is getting interesting!
SD: Yup! And we still have 2 bowls of--hey, where's the candy corn?
Santa: Sorry. I needed a little snack.
SD: You of all people don't need to eat nothing!
Santa: Yup.
SD: Oh darn, a double negative. Whatever, I'm gonna run to the store, you sit patiently for me to return! I'm bringing chapter 8 with me! And oh yeah, Gus invented a machine that increases my speed depending on how many reviews I have! So the more reviews from different people, the faster I get this task done!
Don: That's one lame attempt to get people to review...but I like it!
