DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN ROOKIE BLUE

SUMMARY FOR CHAPTERS 7 TO 12

"Sam I'm right here," Andy told Sam. And she meant it! She kept a torturous overnight vigil waiting and wanting only to be reunited with him.

Sam and Andy's fears and dreams keep drawing them back to each other, while they strive for this eventuality.

In an effort to remain true to the actual existing storyline, the presence of Nick Collins in Andy's life cannot be simply and easily discounted! Yet it is impossible to ignore that Sam and Andy could finally be on the cusp of something right, real and remarkable!

Just like previous chapters, the next six chapters of this story are speckled with flashbacks and dreams.

CHAPTER 7

"Officer McNally," someone was gently shaking her.

She sat up suddenly her eyes squinting in the brightness. She shuddered at the abrupt interruption of her sleep.

"I'm sorry to wake you. It's not the most comfortable of places to sleep…"

"I'm okay. Please just tell me…Sam…." Andy's voice was hoarse, yet urgent.

She blinked to focus on the person before her. She managed to discern that it was the same Emergency Room nurse who had ushered her to this waiting room earlier that night… or last night… depending what the heck the time was now.

Another woman was with her. She stepped forward and introduced herself as a surgeon. Andy was having difficulty calibrating the information. She began to tremble, as she waited for the news she needed to hear.

"He just came out of surgery. He's in the Intensive Care Unit now." The doctor announced with a pasted, sympathetic smile.

Andy swallowed hard and stood still. "Can I go to him?" She murmured.

"No. Not in ICU. If he gets through-"

"In a few hours we should be able to move him to post-op. You can be with him then." The nurse interrupted the doctor.

"Oh," Andy said, dropping back down to her chair. God, was this the news she wanted? It was better than… it was good news wasn't it?

"Is he going to be okay?" She implored them to quell her anxieties.

"He's listed as critical. It's too soon to say." The doctor spoke with a hollow honesty. "He lost a lot of blood, but his internal injuries are minimal. That is very good. If he gets through the next few hours, he'll probably make a full recovery… physically at least."

Andy's heart began hammering harder.

"Well you might want to settle in for a bit longer. It might be a while before we can update you." The ER nurse chipped in. The doctor smiled at Andy and offered some prosaic words of encouragement, before hurrying away down the corridor.

The nurse lingered with her a little longer. "Officer McNally there is someone who really wants to see you."

'Nick,' Andy thought with a sigh. She didn't know how to feel about that. He was being selfless to a point. It was just that… it was just that she couldn't see him right now.

Considering the floodgates of the emotion of the previous few hours, what was the status of things between her and Nick now?

"I … I can't see him right now." She murmured, looking away, so as to avoid the eyes glancing curiously at her.

"Him! You mean her." The nurse responded.

Andy blinked in confusion. God, it must be Marlo. She definitely wasn't ready for that! She loved Sam… she was in love with him. She had told Andy herself just yesterday!

What was there for Andy to say to Marlo right now? 'I know you are hurting Marlo. I understand that. But, I have to be here. I love Sam too… I never stopped. I'm certain he still feels the same about me.'

Maybe it would be best to say nothing to Marlo; after all she would read it all on Andy's face… if she didn't already know it.

Andy was staring vacantly at the nurse, as her thoughts frantically skittered all over the place.

"It's a Detective Nash." The nurse spoke when Andy failed to respond to her. "She said Detective Swarek is her partner."

Andy let out a snort of relief. She even managed a genuine smile, possibly for the first time that night.

"Trace… Traci. Yes of course."

"Good," the nurse smiled. "I'll send a volunteer to get her."

Moments later, Traci was walking towards her. She was holding a steaming cup and a small bag. Everything about her was the personification of warmth and friendship. Andy couldn't have been more in need of both.

Traci planted the cup down on the table and waited a moment before speaking.

"Hey," she said softly.

"Hey," Andy replied.

"How are you holding up?"

"Fine," Andy lied, avoiding Traci's eyes. Traci said nothing in response. After all, Andy was as transparent as a piece of glass – especially now.

Finally Andy relented and looked at her. A tear trickled out of her eye. "Not good Trace. Not good." She replied, truthfully this time.

Traci looked at her, compassion brimming in her soft eyes. Without a word, Andy rose and crumpled into Traci's arms.

"They don't know if he'll make it. They can't say yet for sure." Her voice was weak and broken. Memories and images from a year ago wracked her mind. She saw herself enveloping a broken, collapsing Traci the night Jerry had died.

And yet, almost one year later, here was a full role reversal. Here was a strong, resilient Traci. Here she was resolute, ready and able to give Andy all of her fortitude.

Traci gently released Andy and looked into her tormented eyes. "Listen you're going to calm down and stop thinking the worst. Okay."

"You know Sam Swarek. He's one stubborn smartass! If anyone can beat the odds he can." She continued, eying Andy with calm authority.

Andy nodded, wiped her eyes and smiled again.

"Okay, you probably haven't eaten in hours. There's a muffin and a banana in the bag. I'm sorry, but it's the best I could muster together at this hour."

Andy took the paper bag and flopped back down to the all too familiar chair. Her fingers began playing with the muffin inside.

She really wasn't hungry, but Traci had a point. She needed something to fuel her if she was, at the very least, going to keep up an appearance of coping.

She lifted the cup from the table. "What is this?" she asked curiously. It wasn't the coffee she was expecting, but it had an intriguing aroma.

"It's organic Raspberry Ginseng tea." Traci replied. "It's supposed to be therapeutic and energy infusing according to Celery."

Andy looked at Traci, eyebrows raised quizzically.

"It turns out she carries a whole bunch of remedies and potions in her purse." Traci smirked playfully.

"God. She really is a witch." Andy chuckled. It felt good to joke again.

She took a bite of the muffin. It was tasteless, but she forced herself to continue eating it.

"Is Oliver okay?" She asked earnestly.

"He is getting better. Celery finally had to tell him about Sam. She said he's more worried about Sam and you than himself."

Andy looked away for a moment. Christ, Oliver had always been bluntly frank with her regarding Sam. It was as if he saw through their numerous walls to the transparent reality that existed between them.

Practically from the moment she came back to 15, Oliver had sought to close the massive chasm that developed between her and Sam.

Truthfully there had been so much denial between her and Sam lately… but Oliver simply never bought into any of that.

"Traci, do you remember our first day on the job?" Andy's mind was scurrying about again, yet she fully expecting Traci to be on the same page as her.

She, herself, remembered her obtuse rookie pride as she announced to Oliver that she had "made a couple of arrests."

"I'll never forget Olly's reaction when he saw that I had arrested Sam!"

"I remember," Traci smiled. "Heck what a sham that was! First day and both of us as green as they come." She shook her head in recollection.

"I can't believe I actually apprehended Sam. God… who would have thought!" Andy giggled lightheartedly.

"Yeah, well he really looked like a sketchy dealer. I mean who could blame you for arresting him?" Traci chuckled with complicity.

"I thought he was kind of cute even then. You know, with his hair all super greasy." Andy grinned as she sipped her tea.

She was silent for a long moment, then she took a deep breath before speaking again.

"Traci, I don't know how to explain it, but when Sam is around, I just feel… I don't know safer… you know."

She received a sweet, empathetic smile from Traci in response.

"God I even remember telling Sam that after our first day riding together." Andy murmured softly. She allowed herself the luxury of some more quiet reminiscing.

For one scintillating moment she was back in The Penny parking lot, four years ago. Christ, she realized her and Sam very nearly kissed for the first time that night.

FLASHBACK

He had looked at her, a splintering distinguishable spark in his eyes. "McNally," he had pronounced her name with the slightest sly emphasis on the last part of it. His voice had been so irresistibly sexy too. They had shook hands moments before, and he hadn't released her hand yet. Instead he used that contact to gently pull her closer to his warmth.

Damn she had almost given in then too. She had almost given in after barely a day of knowing him. It had taken all her resolve to break eye contact, and push him gently back with the palm of her other hand.

END OF FLASHBACK

"Andy," Traci was looking at her quizzically, as if she was in some kind of a trance. "Sorry," Andy replied weakly. She really wasn't in control of her rambling mind at the moment.

"You know when Sam wanted to leave the precinct earlier tonight, I kept telling him to stay. I just knew I would feel better… safer with him there." Her voice petered out, as she fought back the tears again.

"It's like he's front and central in my life… even when I have someone else in it." She paused.

Traci smiled quietly at her friend. There was a question there, but she refrained from asking it. She had noticed the hovering, overly concerned Nick tonight.

She had seen him staunchly volunteering Andy to go to Sam, with a look that spoke of a certain self sacrifice. He had also meandered quietly away when she left, his stature and composure seemingly diminished.

If there was something there between Andy and Nick, it was no wonder Gail had been treating Andy like a pariah lately. Still, this wasn't the time to address any of that with Andy.

As if reading Traci's thoughts, Andy looked beseechingly at her. "It's always been Sam." She looked back down at the cup in her hand, her own honesty overwhelming her a little. "I've never been able to get him out of my system. I don't know if I ever will."

There was a nostalgic pang in Andy's voice that began to poke at the all-too fresh wounds still within Traci.

"I know," Traci finally replied in self resignation.

After a while Andy spoke again. "Trace, you're so strong. I really admire that in you."

Traci smiled and snorted. "Try becoming a mother. It's amazing the strength you find when you have a child in your life."

She swiftly fished through her pocket. The next moment she produced a picture of Leo.

Andy took the photo from Traci. She smiled back at the jubilant smiling boy in the picture. It was as though everything fell brilliantly into place, by simply looking at the potential within a child.

She paused and held the picture for several moments before she handed it back to Traci.

"Listen. Why don't you go wash you face and freshen up? I'll be here and make sure you don't miss anything okay." Traci gestured for Andy to get up and stretch her legs.

Andy took another sip of tea, nodded and rose.

"Thanks Trace." She whispered softly.