Author's Note:
Hi everyone:)
Uhm... I really don't know what to say. I'm back! After more than one year, inspiration suddenly hit me and I started writing again (which makes me feel guilty, because I haven't updated my other stories for ages. But school is hell right now and I've discovered a new fandom: 'White Collar'! Love it:D).
Anyways... I hope you still remember what happened before. In case you don't, here's the very short version:
Merlin forced Kilgharrah to tell him the end of the prophecy, which included either him or Arthur dying at the other's hand. Since then he's been very depressed. And now it's Arthur's birthday... and Merlin couldn't go to the banquet, because he had to clean the stables instead (not that he minded all that much).
Okay, up to date again? Then a (very belated) thanks for the reviews, alerts and favourites and... on with the story!
Enjoy and please R&R! :)
Dsiclaimer: Don't own (not even the tite...).
Chapter 5: The Wicked Day
Arthur's room was pitch black when Merlin finally stumbled in, feeling his way in order to stay upright in the dark. His body ached from the day and the whole stress during the last week, but for the first time he felt nearly at peace with himself. Why should he be worried by an old prophecy? It wasn't like he had ever been good at obeying anyone or anything, he wouldn't start now. Forget the old lizard and his stupid riddles.
The young warlock took another step forward, only realizing a second to late that there was a stool in his way. He didn't even have the time to curse before he fell head first, pulling the stool plus parts of Arthur's armour that had been on it down with him. The noise was deafening and for a few moments Merlin just stayed where he lay, groaning as he rubbed his head. Arthur should get a carpet or something. That way the ground wouldn't be as hard and he would be able to have a dent-less armour for once!
A soft sound from the window made the warlock freeze and slowly get back on his hands and knees, careful not to knock himself over again as he lifted. A dark silhouette was huddling against the windowsill, barely visible against the dark sky outside. Whoever it was didn't seem very threatening, but still Merlin was ready to use his magic and fight the intruder at any moment.
Locking his eyes on the shadow, Merlin inched closer, promptly kicking an arm guard across the floor. The silhouette didn't move. It took another five (more silent) steps until he recognized the blond hair and muscled form. Arthur. What was he doing here instead of at his birthday party?
"It's beautiful, isn't it?"
Merlin startled at the slightly slurred words. He hadn't thought that the Prince had noticed him. Though in hindsight, it would have been quite hard not to have noticed his entrance.
The warlock moved to stand next to Arthur, staring through the window across the courtyard. The sky was clear, shining with millions of small diamonds on a soft black ground. It was beautiful.
"It is."
For a few moments, both boys stood in silence, then Merlin sighed. "What are you doing here?"
Arthur didn't react and he already thought that the Prince hadn't heard him at all, when he suddenly turned round and shrugged. "Couldn't stand the party anymore."
The warlock chuckled. Well, he could understand that.
"You could have lighted a candle", he said nonetheless. Again, the Prince shrugged.
"Liked the darkness. 'Snot like I'm scared of it. 'M a warrior. You learn to control your fear."
"Of course." Merlin couldn't hide a small smile, but Arthur didn't seem to notice. "How did you like your presents, o mighty warrior?"
The Prince frowned, obviously trying to find out if his seravnt had just insulted him or actually behaved respectfully. In the end he decided to ignore it.
"I haven't opened them. Yet."
This caused Merlin to raise an eye brow in a near-to-perfect imitation of Gaius. Arthur loved getting things, even though he was a Prince and could get everything he wanted with a snap of his finger (as long as Merlin wasn't around, anyway). There was still something different about getting birthday presents. But today- or rather, tonight- Arthur honestly didn't look like he cared.
"Alright then..." Merlin paused, unsure what to say.
"It's the day of her death, you know" the Prince continued, sounding slightly less slurred, but still not completely sober. Merlin didn't have to ask who. "Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't been born."
The young warlock felt his breath catch at the idea. A world with Igraine would be a world with magic. A world where the Great Purge had never happened, where he would have been able to practice his powers freely, not hide them, where he could help people without having to worry about them being sentenced to death...
And it would also be a world without Arthur. Without the One and Future King, without destiny. Would he, Merlin, even have been born?
"I'm glad you were born" he said finally, backtracking almost immediately. "Not that she... Igraine... died, of course. But you are a great Prince and you will be an even greater King, Arthur. And most of all... you're my friend. And I wouldn't want a world without you."
Even as Merlin said it, he felt the truth behind his words. For all pain this world had brought everyone- Uther, Arthur, sorcerers, magic, him- he wouldn't want it any other way, if that meant that his friend would cease to exist.
Even if he had to die for his destiny. And even if Arthur would be the one killing him.
When Merlin looked up, he noticed the Prince's blue eyes watching him, and he smiled slightly. Tomorrow Arthur would most likely have forgotten what he had said- or that they had talked at all- but he wouldn't forget.
"Thank you" the warlock said softly and Arthur nodded, although he couldn't know what Merlin was thanking him for. For a moment both stood there in silence, enjoying the calmness of the dark room and the knowledge that a friend was nearby, then Merlin sighed and turned around.
He had already reached the doorstep when he stopped again and turned to face Arthur.
"She would be proud of you, you know." He paused, but the Prince didn't react, continuing to gaze at the stars as if they hold all the answers. "You should go and visit your father. He might want to see you." Still no answer. Merlin sighed again, pulling the door closed between them. "Goodnight, Arthur."
Had he known what effect those few innocent words- "You should go and visit your father"- would have, he would still have said them. For if Arthur hadn't visited his father, the assassin would have surprised and killed him. If he hadn't visited his father, it wouldn't have been Uther who had lain on the ground, bleeding out under Arthur's desperate hand.
There would have been no one to call the guards.
And Merlin couldn't bring himself to think differently or even feel remorse- not as he watched Uther's still and ghostly pale face while Gaius bound the injuries, not as he saw the old man's sorrow for an old friend- even if they had separated more and more over the years- and Arthur's pain over almost-and-maybe-still losing his father.
He felt guilty, but he didn't regret it.
Still, it seemed only logical to help Arthur. And if it was only to ease his friend's agony, who cared?
The feeling of hope the rose within him when he heard the Prince's words, spoken in a quiet and serious voice- "There is a way to heal my father. With magic."- was overwhelming and for a moment, just a moment, he thought If this is what it would have taken...
But then Arthur's blue eyes met his, looking lost and scared for the first time he could remember, and Merlin felt bad for thinking like that. Uther was Arthur's father, which meant he had to be saved, for Arthur's good.
He felt proud that Arthur had asked him, out of everyone he could have. It was a prove for the strength of their friendship. For the time being, it seemed like his death was farther away than ever- and that all he had hoped for was finally so close.
It seemed logical then to tell Arthur about his magic, everything. He could remember the scene to the last detail:
Him, slowly opening the door- without knocking, as always- feeling more nervous than he could remember having felt ever before. Arthur stood at the window, gazing outside as the evening settled over Camelot, like the night of his birthday. It felt like ages ago now.
Merlin entered just as quietly and then leaned with his back against the door, seeking support and feeling surrounded at the same time. It took hours for him to open his mouth, longer to talk. "I have to tell you something."
The Prince turned around, obviously sensing that something important was happening, and Merlin forced himself to push away from the door and face his friend in the middle of the room. "Arthur-"
He couldn't continue. He couldn't.
"What is it?"
His friend's voice sounded calm while his eyes were scanning Merlin, looking for signs of what was wrong in the way they always had- more alive than for the past few days. It gave the warlock enough courage to take a shuddering breath.
"You said that you wanted to use magic- to heal your father" he started, eyes locking with Arthur's to make sure his opinions hadn't changed. The Prince simply nodded, for once waiting patiently. "I have to-"
Again he paused, unsure of how to proceed. How do you tell your best friend that you have been lying to them since the day you first met?
"Do you still remember when Gwen was imprisoned because Uther thought she had cured her father with magic and killed all the others? Before we found out that it was really the Afanc?"
Arthur nodded again without a moment of hesitation. "You ran in front of the whole Court and told them you were a sorcerer and had healed Tom."
"I told the truth."
It was out, before he could take another breath- and then leaving him wishing he had, because now he was standing there and couldn't quite remember how to breathe in.
"I'm a warlock, Arthur. I have magic. I was born with it. But I... I-" Breathe. Just breathe. "I swear, I've only ever used it to help you. Or well, help people. I've only used it against you when we fought, the second time we met. And you didn't even notice, so no harm done, right? And-"
Merlin noticed he was rambling and quickly shut his mouth, watching Arthur. The Prince stood stockstill, eyes narrowed to slits.
"Don't lie to me, Merlin."
His voice was raw and for a moment Merlin felt disappointed, frustrated, that Arthur would think that- but then he simply lifted his hand and whispered: "Forbearne."
The flame that appeared on his hand was small, about twice the size of that of a normal candle, but still Arthur's hand reached for his sword. Merlin flinched and pulled his hand back, extinguishing the fire.
But realizing what he was doing, the Prince slowly took his hand back and let it fall to his side, watching Merlin like an animal that could attack you at any moment.
"Why haven't you told me?"
"I didn't want to force you to decide between me and your father. I guess I was scared of destroying our friendship. But now that he is..." Merlin paused and tried again. "I can see how much it hurts you to lose him. So I will help you." He gulped. "If you still want me to, that is."
Arthur nodded slowly, understanding shining in his eyes. "You have had... it... since you were born? How is that possible?"
The warlock managed a small smile. "I'm no ordinary sorcerer. Every now and then it happens that someone discovers magic without being taught. Usually it happens around puberty, sometimes at a young age too and rarely at an older age. The druids call me a warlock- a being of magic. Morgana was a witch." He flinched, realizing too late that mentioning Morgana was probably not his best choice, but Arthur didn't react to it.
In fact, he didn't react a lot to Merlin having magic at all.
"So, you're powerful?" the Prince only asked, ignoring his servant's frightened glances. Merlin nodded.
"I'm said to be the most powerful magic user walking the earth."
Maybe he should have left that out too, but Arthur simply nodded. "And you would help me?"
So that's what it was about. "It's what I've always done, Arthur" he answered quietly. "And what I'll always do."
The Prince exhaled slowly. "Then you are welcome to do so."
He turned and walked back to the window, only slightly tense at turning his back to a sorcerer. Merlin gaped at him for a few seconds, then he decided to leave and let Arthur think it over. Maybe- hopefully- the Prince would be better once he had healed his father.
When he had almost reached the door, Arthur called him back. "Merlin?"
The warlock froze and then slowly turned, meeting Arthur's eyes. "Yes?"
Arthur sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. When he spoke, he sounded more like his usual self. "You are still an idiot and I will be very angry at you once this is all over, I promise. But for now all that matters to me is that you can help my father."
Merlin nodded quickly. "I can."
"Good." Again the Prince paused, seeming unsure for a moment before he made a decision. "If you can save him, I give you my solemn word that when I am King, things will be different. You won't have to live in fear."
All Merlin could do was gape at Arthur- for the second time in the past five minutes. This was his wish come true, his destiny coming to a conclusion. It was scary and liberating at once. It was more than he had ever hoped for and it made his heart jump with joy, made him want to hug Arthur, but he couldn't- not right now. The Prince would probably react on instinct and kill the sorcerer running towards him.
And with that one thought, suddenly it was easier to be serious again.
All Merlin managed was a quiet "Thank you", then he was out of the room and running to his room, where he could let his legs give out and lie on the ground unmoving for a few minutes without anyone questioning him.
Was it alright? I'm really unsure about the whole revealing scene... felt a bit quick. But I wanted to get the plot moving again. (There isn't even that much plot left to move... o.o but like I said, there'll be a sequel).
Oh, and by the way- I'm doing NaNoWriMo, so I didn't think I would write any fanfiction this month. But the original story I chose isn't going all that well, so I'm working on fanfics right now... which means you can expect more updates relatively soon. Though of course reviews always help:) *hint, hint*
