Many, many thanks to my Lillyankh as always and Jordandear The Marvellous for the reviews! *hands pom-poms* Also to moonlight2356 for adding this to their favourites and to LiteraryMirage and Blackmorning for adding this to their alerts – I love you all!
Sorry it has been so long but the stress of exams and ex-girlfriends has been weighing me down a bit. Personally I think that all things beginning with 'ex' should be banned.
But fanfiction helps, so on with the story!
Neverose.
Chapter Seven
"Riku…? He went on a date with Riku?" Sora nodded. Leon turned to walk away.
"Do you know Cloud, then?" Sora asked. Leon looked down and whispered,
"Intimately."
Sora was annoyed. He was sick and tired of guys being mysterious and pissy around him. First Riku, then Cloud and now Leon! And to top it all off, he had received a postcard from Kairi. There was a photo of her and her new… At the Summer House. She hadn't taken him there until they'd been together for nearly two years but he was there already? It wasn't fair. It just wasn't fair. He sulked back towards the house in a depression-induced trance, as was his usual state of late. He thought back to the night he and Kairi had spent at the Summer House under the stars together. He saw his first shooting star that night. It was perfect. One of the most perfect nights of his entire life, snuggled in a hammock and listening to the ocean. Until the next morning, when she had one of her hissy fits again as Sora was being 'too immature'. Kairi always hated the childlike part of his personality. She wanted a man – not a boy. But Sora couldn't suppress it all of the time. He tried. But not…
"Sora? Sora, are you ignoring me?" Sora looked around to see Yuffie right behind him.
"Christ Yuffie, you made me jump!"
"I've been calling you for ages… Are you okay?"
"Yeah… yeah I'm okay." He hastily wiped away any traces of sadness from his face.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes! I just said I'm fine, okay?"
"But you were crying…?" Sora was getting agitated now. He didn't want to think about it and he certainly didn't want to talk about it. "Please, Sora. If you need to talk–"
"Just shut the fuck up Yuffie!" Yuffie's reassuring smile vanished. She was in shock. Sora had never expressed such anger before… And almost unprovoked. What was happening to him?
Sora froze, in disbelief of what he had just said. Why had he lost it like that? It was so unlike him. But it had been happening more and more lately. He could feel the darkness inside his heart growing stronger. He blamed Kairi. But knew that it was him and only him who was letting the darkness spread. Because he was sick of fighting it. Because he had nothing and no-one to dispel it for. He wanted it to take him over. He wanted to be controlled again. And Kairi and the darkness were not so different.
Leon entered The Hollow Hotel filled with anticipation. Was he here? Would he see him again after all this time? The man he loved…
"Squall?" Leon turned around abruptly. Nobody had called him by that name in years… Cloud gazed at him longingly as he tried to adjust to what he was seeing. Cloud had grown since he had last seen him and gained a few more battle scars. But he was still… beautiful. "Squall? Are you okay?" Leon snapped out of his daze and fixed the man with a pointed look.
"Where the hell have you been?" he demanded.
"That's what you say to me? That's what you say to me after all this time?" Cloud roared. They were both fuming.
"Well what was I supposed to think? You go charging off after… him," Cloud looked momentarily affronted before regaining his deadpan expression. "And you never spare a thought for… for me."
"Since when have you gotten all… emotional?" Cloud asked, intrigued by Leon's unusual behaviour.
"It's not my fault," he protested. "I live with two women, a gay guy and Sora! Oh and Cid, but he's always away with the moogles…" Cloud looked confused. Leon shrugged. Then, like lightening, the two men embraced each other in a passionate kiss. It was as though they were making up for every second they had spent apart and every second yet to come. They clung to each other as if the world was collapsing around them and all they had to hold onto was each other. When they finally broke off, gasping for breath, they held each other's gaze.
"I missed you," Leon whispered. Cloud playfully punched him on the shoulder and retorted,
"Don't get mushy, it doesn't suit you." Leon snorted and followed the man upstairs to his room like nothing had changed. And for the first time in months, he smiled.
Sora spent a long time looking at the photo of Kairi and her new boyfriend. She meant well. She was worried about him and wanted to see how he was. But just thinking about thinking about them… It destroyed him. And to be confronted with an image of them together… In a place that… It was too much. Sora had never felt this way before and he couldn't handle it. He needed somebody. Anybody. But Riku was off doing… something. Either with or without Cloud… And Leon was off looking for Cloud and Aerith was too nice to trouble with his sadness and Yuffie probably never wanted to speak to him again. He felt as though he was falling. Falling into the darkness. Alone and unwanted by the one person he just wanted to be happy. But he couldn't make her happy. This new guy… He could. In just two months, apparently. No, he couldn't do it, he had to leave. Again. Go somewhere isolated. With no other people. He went home to start packing his bags but collapsed before he had gotten very far. He sat in a crumpled heap upon the floor, sobbing into his shirt. He didn't look up as Riku entered the bedroom, but kept his head buried thoroughly in his arms. Riku sat down beside the boy.
"I heard about what happened with Yuffie… Are you okay?"
"Am I okay?" Sora scoffed, "I'm a monster." Riku put a reassuring arm around his shoulders,
"No, no you're not a monster Sora. You could never be a monster. You're just hurting."
"I'm so sick of hurting. I'm so sick of waking up everyday in pain and remembering all of the little things she did that tore my world apart. Did you know that she was seeing him for six months before she left me?" Riku shook his head. "And when she first started talking to him, she was saying how she was trying to be honest with him, and tell him everything about her life. How could she say that to my face? When she was never honest with me. At the start, she lied about everything. She lied about wanting me, loving me and lied about all the other boys she was…" Sora broke off abruptly, unable to continue. Riku pulled the man into an embrace. "It's just stupid pointless little things that seem like the biggest things in the world…" he mumbled.
"I know," Riku reassured. "Heartbreak is the most painful thing a person can go through… In whatever form it may take." Sora hadn't missed the pain in Riku's voice.
"You… you've had your heart broken, Riku?"
"Of course, everyone has."
"Who broke your heart?" Sora asked. Riku looked down. Should he say it? Should he risk it? What would he say? How would he react? After all this time and all this pain, there was only one way to find out for certain. Riku took a shaky breath and replied,
"You."
