Chapter 7! Let's see how Near does on his first day of school!
7
Natasha and Near entered the history classroom and approached the teacher.
"Near, this is Mr. Schloo…Schul…schilly… the teacher." A tall man who appeared to be of Dutch origin sat at a large desk. He smiled and held his hand out to Near.
"It's Mr. Schoonhoven, it's very nice to meet you." Near smiled and shook his hand.
"Nice to meet you Mr. Schou…uh, can I call you Bob?" The teacher laughed.
"Interesting, that just happens to be my first name! And no. Anyway, we'll wait for the rest of the students to get here then we'll find a seat for you."
Natasha walked over to her desk and set her things down. Near followed her. "You'll like him." She said, "Compared to all the other teachers, he's pretty much the only normal one here." Near's imagination started going wild again. "What does she mean by 'normal'? Could it be that everyone else is under the control of Kira? What makes this teacher different than the others, and are the students under Kira's control as well?"
A few minutes later, the rest of the students entered the classroom. One blonde boy pointed to Near, "Hey, who's the albino? Is he our next science project?" Near didn't seem to respond as a brunette boy with longer hair approached the one who just spoke. "This is geography class, doofus!" was all that he said before sitting down.
"I knew that! I was testing you! You passed!" The bell rang and the teacher took attendance before turning to Near.
"Near, there's an open seat next to Billy and Willy in the back, you can sit there." He grabbed his books and headed for the seat that was right in between a short, big-nosed boy and a dirty, bald kid who looked like he couldn't even name the alphabet. As soon as Near sat down, the dirty kid, who was sitting on the right side, started making some really weird screamy noises and started to eat his shoe. He watched horrified as the kid sitting on his left tapped his shoulder.
"That's Willy," Said the big-nosed kid, "He does that sometimes." Near could only nod slightly with his face still frozen in his 'freaked out' face.
"Okay…I guess that's good to know…" Willy really started screaming when he wasn't able to eat his shoe. Billy just pointed at him.
"SHUT YOUR FAT PIE HOLE!!!" he screamed. Everyone in class just kept doing their work, as if this was normal or just didn't exist. Near wasn't sure he could stand an entire hour of this, but if he wanted to get to know Natasha better, sacrifices had to be made. He just took a deep breath and readied himself for the remaining forty-five minutes of terror.
***
Giovanni awoke in the dumpster that he was thrown into by "Tiny". He sat up still in a daze. The first thing that came back was the fact that he had been thrown into a dumpster because he was following Near. The last thing that came back was his sense of smell. He quickly climbed out and looked at his watch. It was 8:55 am. According to the schedule that Near had received, school began at 8:10. Giovanni remembered being tossed out somewhere around 8: 00, maybe 8:07, so he had been unconscious for about an hour almost. It was obvious that he would just get caught again smelling like a dumpster, but he had strict orders to watch Near. Maybe he could head back and take a quick shower and change, school was about seven or eight hours long. But something could happen to Near in that short time.
He decided to break into one of the lockers and acquire some spray-on deodorant. He snuck around the building into the locker rooms and quickly started picking at one of the locks. In less than a minute he attained the deodorant and started spraying. He suddenly realized that he was being watched…by a girl.
She stared at him, and he stared at her. It suddenly dawned on Giovanni that he might have broken into the girl's locker room by mistake. That would explain the peculiar scent of fruit. He started to slowly back up when he bumped into something, or someone. He looked up to see a 7 foot 2 girl with an overbite, facial hair, and pigtails.
"Tiny's sister I presume?" She grunted and looked over at the first girl, who pointed at Giovanni.
"¡PequeÑa, este hombre loco invadiό mi armario! Y el tiene una cascara de banana en su cabeza!" Tiny's sister, PequeÑa, grabbed Giovanni by the back of his neck (the same way that Tiny grabbed him) and tossed him back into the dumpster. However, Giovanni still had the perfume (but he still thought it was deodorant). He hopped out of the dumpster and started spraying himself with the perfume before throwing it away. He knew that it made him smell like fruit, but it was better than smelling like a dumpster at least.
***
Near wasn't sure how much more of this he could take. Willy was so inhumanely dumb that he couldn't understand how Willy managed to get into a freshman class. Maybe he was being controlled by Kira? The same could be said about Billy, but he was on an entirely different level of stupidity. The teacher didn't seem to notice Near's misery, and if he did, he probably didn't even care. He was just rambling on about Greenland or something.
"…Greenland is the place with all of the ice. Iceland is where all the green stuff is, and that's possibly where our entire broccoli source comes from…"
Near looked up at the clock, which read 9:03. Only two more minutes of this misery. Where was Giovanni? He probably should've intervened by now! What could he possibly be doing, getting thrown into a dumpster and spraying himself with perfume?
9:04. Now only fifty-eight seconds away from freedom. Fifty. Forty-seven. Forty-two. Thirty-nine…
The teacher who has a really long name looked at Near. "Near, are you paying attention?"
"Huh? Uh…yeah."
"Then what did I just say?"
"Uh…Greenland has ice. Iceland has broccoli."
"And?"
"Um……" What was that last thing? Before Near could answer, the bell rang and the entire class ran out. Natasha waited for Near as he grabbed his stuff and did his best to not be trampled by the students and the two dim-witted creatures that Near was forced to sit next to.
That was only first period, wait 'till Near sees what awaits him in second period!
Billy and Willy are cameos in case you're wondering. Willy is from a TV show called Invader Zim and Billy is from a TV show called The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy.
In case you're wondering what "¡PequeÑa, este hombre loco invadiό mi armario! Y el tiene una cascara de banana en su cabeza!" means, it means something like, "Little, this crazy man broke into my locker! And he has a banana peel on his head!"
Let's hope that Near and Giovanni can survive second period! :)
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