We Cannot Shake This Fear
Author: LexysCPD
Words: 1,132
Disclaimer: I don't own Chicago PD, the song lyrics (Titles), and the plot.
Author's Notes: Sorry for going AWOL with this story, I had a major case of writers block. The 39 reviews, 87 follows, and 34 favorites make me happy.
The chapter title is from the song, Do Not Hang Your Head by Elizabeth & the Catapult.
Uploaded: August 21, 2014
Erin had finished showering, and was sitting in the kitchen, Jay wanted to take Cassie out for some ice cream, and her daughter loved spending time with Jay. Erin thought about Jay, and wondered what they were. She knew he was her best friend, and they had gone out a few times. Sometimes it was with Cassie, sometimes it was just the two of them. She wondered if she was his girlfriend, She stood up and made lunch for the others. They should be coming home soon.
Erin smiled, thinking of their small family. Cassie had the family she always wanted. She had her mother, Grandpa Voight, Uncles Antonio, Adam, Olinsky, and Kevin, Aunts Laura and Kim, and cousins Ava and Diego, and lastly, a father in Jay.
Her mind went to Chad. She had loved him. She had thought she could change him, but she didn't. She couldn't change him. He didn't want to change. She was a fool to trust him.
Erin walked into her apartment, and smiled when she saw candles and flowers around her. She looked at her bedroom, and Chad stood n the doorway. He had a bouquet of flowered. She walked up to him and pulled him for a kiss.
She pulled away, but kept her arms wrapped around his neck. "What is all this for?"
He gave her a crooked smile. "No reason."
He pulled her into the room, and closed the door behind them.
When Erin woke up the next morning, Chad was gone. He left a note saying he had to take care of business.
A few weeks later he was arrested, and a few days after that, she found out she was pregnant. She thought about where she would be if he had never been arrested. She wondered if how Cassie's life would be. She wondered if Chad would have been a good father.
Erin's phone started to ring, startling her. She reached for it and placed it against her ear. "Hello?"
"Hi mommy. I miss you," Cassie said from the other side of the phone.
"I miss you too baby. Are you being good?"
"Yes Mommy. I'm always good."
"I know. I'll pick you up soon, okay. Be good to Aunt Laura," Erin told her.
"I will, mommy."
Erin hangs up and smiles. She closes her eyes and thinks about her little girl, her pride and joy. She couldn't pick a better daughter.
There was a knock on the door. She didn't know if she wanted to answer it. She thought about Jay and Chad. It could be one of them. She was hoping for the former. She didn't know what the latter would do.
She opened the door, and Jay stood there. He had a smile on his face, as he handed her a coffee. She thanked him and took it.
She let him in, and they sat at the table. He placed a bag on the table, and took out the breakfast he got. They ate in silence. She noticed that Jay was watching her. He had a smile on her face. She blushed.
"What are you thinking about?" she asked, picking up her coffee.
"That I'm a lucky guy. I have you and Cassie in my life," he said, as he wiped the coffee smudge off her lips. She grinned and leaned forwards, capturing his lips with hers. Jay laughed, and Erin pushed him away.
He got up and threw her onto his shoulder. She squealed, as she demanded for him to let her down.
He laughed, as he ran around.
"You're going to drop me!"
"Do you trust me?" he asked, when he stopped running.
"Depends. Are you going to let me down?"
"No. But you trust me anyways," he told her. He moved around the house, and got their things. She squirmed, trying to get him to let her down, but he wouldn't budge. He just chuckled, and carried her out of the room. He sat her in his car, and moved to the driver seats.
He pouted when he saw that Erin climbed over to the driver seat, and was ready to drive.
"When do I get to drive?" he asked, after he got to the passengers seat.
Erin looked at him with a smirk. "When you grow up."
Jay huffed, as he playfully glared at her.
She laughed and drove them to work.
Chicago PD
Chad was watching. He wanted his daughter. He wanted her back. He was going to get her back, and Erin was not going to do anything about it. He was willing to try again, to get Joint Custody. He was willing to let both of them (Erin and Chad) be in Cassie's life. But if Erin didn't agree, then he was going do whatever it took to get her back. He promised her, and himself that, as he headed away.
Chicago PD
The day was uneventful. Cassie was asleep in her room, while Erin got ready for bed. She had a smile on her face. She was finally happy. There was a knock on the door. Her smile grew bigger, as she walked to open it.
"I told you we'll be fine," she said, as she opened it. Her smile was wiped off when she saw Chad there, a smile on her face.
"Really?" he asked, a grin on her face.
"What do you want?" Erin asked, angrily.
"You know what I want. I want my daughter," he demanded.
"Your daughter? You don't even know her!"
"Whose fault is that?"
"Yours," Erin answered, glaring back.
"I want my daughter," he sneered, getting angry.
"You're not going to get her. She's not your daughter, she never was. Your name is not even on her birth certificate. As far as she's concerned, you're nothing," she told him, ready to strike him.
"I don't care. She's going to be mine. I warned you," he threatened, as he walked away.
Erin watched him go. She felt someone pull her shorts. She looked down and saw her daughter.
"I thought you were sleeping," Erin whispered, as closed the door and locked it.'
"I heawd scweamin'," she answered, rubbing her eyes.
"Come and sleep with mommy," Erin said, as she looked down.
Cassie nodded and raised her arms, wanting to be picked up. She picked up the girl and headed to her bedroom, turning off all the lights on her way. Cassie rested her head on her mother's shoulder and fell asleep.
Erin placed the girl on her bed, and watched her daughter sleep, not sure what to do about Chad's threat. She wanted to tell Voight, but she didn't want to become depended. She frowned, not sure what to do. Soon she became too tired to do anything, and she let sleep take over.
Next Chapter:
What Do I Stand For?
