i made a playlist of songs alex would listen to user/laurenbayuk/playlist/1QQXFxoTKJND8znxNnHDSX


It was so pathetic that if Seth was too busy to see me or didn't text me, I spent the entire day inside the house. Selena enjoyed the company, considering she was still craving a mate, but I knew I had better options than a horny cat.

Baba got home early from work, so Dad ordered some extra cheesy pizza and the three of us decided it would be a good time for a movie night. Normally, and by normally I mean back in San Diego, I would have thrown on my lazy day sweatpants and curled up on the couch before we even decided on a movie, but today I was feeling restless. The sun had yet to set, so it was bright enough for me to explore, and I needed to get out of the house before the day ended.

"Hey Baba," I said, approaching my younger father with a small, pleading smile on my face. He turned around and gave me a knowing look, knowing I was going to ask for something. He lifted his thick eyebrows at me. "Do you mind if I skip out on movie night tonight? I'm feeling a bit restless and I need to go out and get some new clothes and stuff anyway. Plus Selena's just as restless as me and needs new toys."

A soft laugh fell from his lips. "You need more clothes?" he challenged with a smile on his face. "I find that to be slightly unbelievable. You have more plain, black shirts than I have pants, jigar."

Dad interjected with a laugh of his own. "No, she needs to go thrifting and spend $30 on a too small Hawaiian shirt she would make fun of us for wearing." My dads shared a laugh at my expense, and I let out a little giggle of my own, knowing they're right.

Baba smiled at me. "You can go out, just don't spend too much money, and try to come back before midnight. You know, there are like, bears and such."

I fought the urge to roll my eyes. Yeah. Bears.

The good thing about having parents that trust you is that you end up with a car at night driving to a city you've never been to before to find some thrift shop. The bad thing about having parents that trust you is that you end up in a city you've never been to at night to find some thrift shop, which is more terrifying than one may presume. Of course, Port Angeles was no San Diego, but the nonetheless it was a populated area in which I was unfamiliar. By the time I had arrived, the sun had dipped below the horizon and streetlights were the only thing that lit my way. I couldn't wait to get out and stretch my legs, feel the moonlight on my skin and breathe in the air. I felt safer about the lack of animals at this time, considering the lack of trees.

I had to drive for about twenty minutes before I found parking, but once I did it was inconvenient and out of the way. Full of nervous habits, I put my keys in between each of my fingers and locked my car six times. It only takes one incident to change the way you do things forever, and I would always be on the verge of self-defense, ready to fight anyone that posed a threat. The parking lot was just a little ways away from what looked like a shopping center, so I put my fists in my sweatshirt pockets and kept my head down as I walked under fluorescent street lamps. The farther away I got from the empty lot, the safer I would feel.

Port Angeles was small and disappointing. Almost every shop there catered to older women or was insanely overpriced. I had managed to find a few thrift shops, but they were mostly ugly, odd smelling men's clothes from the eighties, and no matter what any fashion magazines told me, the eighties were not back in fashion. I had found one pet store, but it was a pet store full of snakes that looked very poisonous and very angry to be kept in a cage. The shop keeper, who's beard had what looked like a ham sandwich stuck in it, gave me a sickening smile that was probably just meant to be friendly. I left that store quicker than any of any of the others, with a tightened grip around my keys. It had crossed my mind that, maybe despite the trust of my parents and protesting to my therapists, I wasn't ready to be out on my own like this. As I walked down the street, I flinched at every man that walked by, trying to puff out my shoulders and make myself seem stronger while also shrinking into myself, hoping they wouldn't notice me.

It didn't work, but I didn't notice that.

My seemingly irrational fear of men somehow brought my mind back to Seth, the gangly boy with deep eyes and a wolfish grin. Whenever I saw a man I didn't recognize, I backed up in fear and planned my first strategy in self-defense. But, for some reason, I decided to trust Seth the second I met him. I walked into a house alone with him, willingly. Of course, he had given me no reason not to trust him, but then again neither did the many male faces I saw on a daily basis. For some wild reason, I trusted him, and I craved his protection. The thought of him by my side seemed drastically more safe and comforting than this. I cursed my restless energy that brought me here instead of eating extra cheesy pizza with my parents while we watched White Chicks in sweats.

Not only was I feeling intense paranoia over every man that passed me in the street, but I was also tossing around the knowledge that I was up all night playing with a giant wolf. I knew sneaking out in the middle of the night to find a secluded area was dumb, considering the "...animals" comment. But I was panicking, breathing heavily, and managed to shove a pocket knife in my sweatshirt. But that wolf was like a giant dog, panting with his tongue out and what looked like a stupid smile. He wagged his tail when I scratched his ears and licked my face. I named him Nugget. If that was the kind of animal Seth warned me about, then there really was a nothing to be scared of in that tiny little reservation. I felt considerably safer knowing that I befriended a giant wolf with razor sharp teeth.

I was thinking about my intense need to be protected as I walked down the poorly lit street. Every street in this state was a hill, and I had been walking up and down these stupid hills. Despite the fear, I was enjoying my late night stroll through the city. As I stumbled towards the bottom of one hill, I heard a noise from my left. There was a space between two buildings, and my stomach lurched at the sight of them. Two men stood there with bottles of alcohol, one smoking a cigarette. My breath caught in my throat when I made eye contact. They knew I was here, and the sickening grin on their faces made my stomach churn.

I walked a little bit quicker, trying to get back to the parking lot quicker. My eyes snapped shut and I exhaled. This could not be happening. "Hey, sweetheart!" I heard one call after me, and I almost threw up. My legs couldn't move fast enough and I felt that same tingling sensation in my back. They were getting closer and there was nothing I could do about it. This was my luck. Being surrounded and followed and stalked by men like the ones that were getting dangerously close to my back. "Hey, baby girl!" I flinched. Not that name.

I didn't turn around. I was praying that if I kept my head down, they would ignore me. Leave me alone. Let me live. Prayers that were not answered, because I felt a hand snake around my arm, and whip my body around. I was face to face with these two men. Fuck why was everyone taller than me? I felt the cool metal of my keys in between my fingers and thought about how I probably wouldn't even be able to reach either of their faces to tear them up. "It's not polite to ignore gentlemen callers, sweetheart," one of them said while taking a sip out of a bottle.

My eyes narrowed at him. "Yeah, well I'm not exactly interested in any callers." I tried to pull away, but he kept an iron grip on my arm. "Let go of me."

When they laughed, I knew they had no intention of doing any such thing. I acted before I could think, and before they could do something worse I used the arm that was free and swung my fist, with the keys in between each of my fingers, and swung at the man holding me. When the metal hit his face, the blood seeped out in what looks like claw marks. He kept the firm grip on my arm, though turning away his face. "Fuck!" he yelled. "You bitch!"

"I said let me go," I snapped back, pulling my body away from him once more.

The other man looked at me with contempt. "Oh, your gonna get it now," he growled, and fear stopped the words in my throat.

The tingling sensation hit my spine again, and I lost all hope, convinced it was someone else ready to join. "She said to let her go." Hope rushed over me at the sound of that familiar voice.

I turned my head to see Embry standing there, looking far more terrifying than the last time I saw him. Fuck he was tall. Why the hell was everyone here so tall? "Bro, you better stay out of this," said the man who currently wasn't nursing a bleeding cheek. I used this opportunity to pull away, and I backed up behind Embry. "We were just about to have our way with the little babe."

Embry shrugged. "Oh, well that's interesting because-" and then he punched the guy in the face.

I was partially convinced Embry killed the guy, and I didn't feel an ounce of sympathy. He dropped to the ground like a fly, and I shrugged. My attack was a lot braver, while, admittedly, Embry's was a lot more badass. "C'mon, let's go," he said, and I followed him away from the two men, though I kept looking back at the scene. "Did you rip his eye out? That would have been sick. Anyways, can I catch a ride home with you? I ran here."


Embry Call made for interesting company.

Firstly, I was profoundly disturbed by the idea that he ran all the way to the closest city. Second, he was so flippant about what had happened. I punch dudes all the time, is what he said when I demanded answers. And that seemed hard to question, considering how quickly he made that dude drop. He tried to make casual conversation with me while I was still processing the fact that I almost got...I don't even know what. Embry was acting like it was a normal Thursday night.

"So what CDs do you have?" he questioned casually, getting settled in my passenger seat. "Unless you're an AUX chord type person."

I shook my head as I began driving away from the spot. I was desperate to get away from Port Whatever and never go back. "They're uh, in the glove box. It's mostly nineties alternative and-"

"No way! You have the Jonas Brothers?"

"-and the Jonas Brothers," I finished with a small laugh. "To be fair I got most of them a few years ago. But then again I still listen to them, so."

I kept my eyes on the road while he flipped through the book of CDs. "How do you have every Weezer CD? That's amazing!"

"Yeah, I just guess I'm really cool and individual or whatever so, um, are you gonna tell me why you ran here? And how you were conveniently right there when I needed help?" I questioned as we drove on what seemed like a completely deserted road, surrounded by nothing but giant old trees. I should have felt uncomfortable, but because he was Seth's friend, he had to be somewhat trustworthy.

Embry just chuckled. "Can't you just be appreciative that I was there? I'm sure you don't wanna imagine what would have happened if I wasn't there." I gulped. He was right. "Although," he said with a grin, "I'm sure you would have liked it much better if Seth was there to save you," he teased.

I rolled my eyes, despite a blush reaching my cheeks. "I've met Seth three times. He's a nice guy but I don't have fantasies about him rescuing me from perverts on the street." It was true, but the idea of Seth there instead of his friend did make me feel that same warm feeling. I pictured him punching that dude and fuck it had me feeling some type of way.

"So what I'm getting at is you do have fantasies about him, just not ones with such a damsel in distress type vibe?" I shot him a quick glare. "You should be grateful it was me instead of Seth. Call me crazy but I don't think witnessing Seth murder two dudes in cold blood would have made you feel any better."

"I'm not a damsel in distress," I shoot back. "Did you not see me punch that guy in the face? I took self-defense classes in San Diego. The owner of the shop gave me a discount because he thought I was Latina."

He snorted. "Alright, I'll give you that. Putting the keys between your fingers was smart. That guy's probably gonna have scars on his face for weeks. I hope he has to explain to his mom or girlfriend or whoever why he has cuts all over his face. Were you walking around like that?" he asked, and I just gave a nod in response, not exactly feeling proud of my paranoia, despite the fact that it had paid off. Speaking of which, it was likely said paranoia would increase dramatically. "That's badass dude."

"Fuck, I guess you're right," I agreed with a small chuckle. "So are you going to tell me why you ran here?" I could see why my therapists and parents found it annoying when I deflected so heavily. I just wanted a straight answer from the kid.

"No probably not." I turned to stare at him. Was he just going to blatantly shut me down like that? "Hey, keep your eyes on the road. I know I'm a good looking dude, but we wouldn't want to make Sethy-boy jealous now would we?"

I turned my eyes back to the road not because he told me to, but because I didn't want to look at him anymore. Also, whenever he mentioned Seth, I became acutely aware of the fact that I missed him, and I didn't like that. How could you miss someone you barely knew? "I'm going to ignore literally everything you just said. And I'm contemplating ignoring your existence. The jury's still out on that one, though." I paused. "You're awfully comfortable around me, despite the fact we met like, yesterday."

He grinned. "Yeah, well I figured since Seth's gonna be having you around a lot we might as well be friends. And besides, you're fun to tease. Those make for good qualities in a friend. Freinds with my friends, and easy to make fun of.

"You know I think that's called bullying? And how do you know Seth's gonna be having me around a lot? Don't know how many times I've said this but I've only met him three times. Shit, for all I know he could be like, a weirdo who likes My Little Pony, or is like a serial killer or something." This was a stupid thing to say. I knew that I would be spending a lot of time with Seth, if things went my way, because of that stupid connection I couldn't deny, no matter how hard I tried to fight it. "For all I know, you could be into My Little Pony."

"Um, no. I'm not a bronie. Not sure if you could tell, but I'm a smoking hot nineteen year old Native boy with killer abs and a great smile. I don't need to sexualize a little girl's show to get off."

I shook my head. Seth's friends were wild. "Wow Embry I think you need to work on your self esteem. It's not healthy to think so low of yourself."

"Ah, there's no need to deny it. Everyone knows I'm cute. If Seth didn't have a claim on you, there would be absolutely no denying it." I went to retaliate, but was interrupted by the loud, howl of a wolf. I nearly crashed the car. "Speaking of which, I've gotta go explain to loverboy why I've been flirting with his girl. See ya."

And with that, Embry rolled down the window and jumped out of my moving car.

"What the fuck?" I yelled after him, slamming on the breaks. Quick as I could, I jumped out of the drivers seat and looked for him, but he disappeared. He was completely gone. "What the FUCK?" I yelled, throwing my arms up around me.

Defeated, I got back in my car and sped home. I was tired, and not in the mood to question anything anymore. San Diego sucked, but here, in Washington, nothing made sense. Giant wolves hung out with me and random boys jumped out of my car. Fuck. Seth seemed to be the only normal part about this weird ass town.