A/N: Sooooo, I had some requests for Tank's thoughts, so I put together this little outtake from his POV. Hopefully it will give you a little glimpse into what he's thinking! As always, a BIG thank you to everyone who has reviewed or followed since my last chapter, I don't have time to personally respond to each of you but your comments mean the world to me and keep me going! :)
Outtake 1 – Tank's Reaction
When Stephanie had disappeared three years ago, it was hell. For the majority of the men at RangeMan she was a beacon of light in our otherwise dark world. We had spent so many years in the army seeing things that no one else could imagine that we all to some degree thought we were damaged or not worthy of a woman's love or affection.
Stephanie blew all that out of the water the moment she walked into Ric's life. Once he brought her into RangeMan he changed all of our lives. She accepted each and every one of us without showing fear of us and without any judgment of our pasts.
She was the reason that Bobby had given up his playboy ways and decided to give a relationship a try, because if there really were women out there like Steph he wanted to have one. While I don't think that Sarah is as amazing as Steph, she is definitely one of a kind and a great match for Bobby. You can see how happy they are just by looking at them when they're together, and I know that when the baby comes they will be even happier.
I had seen the way that Ric had been treating Steph before she had disappeared and I wasn't happy about it. All of us could see the relationship with the cop was barely holding on and it definitely didn't have what it took to be a long term thing. In all honesty, we were never sure why she was dating him in the first place. All the guys knew of how he took her virginity behind the case at the Tasty Pastry – after all we were men and we had all used the men's room at Pino's at least once.
But instead of making a move like a decent man, Ric would take her behind the bonds office and kiss her senseless before leaving her dazed and confused. The poor girl never knew what was up and down when she was with him. I knew all about the deal he had made with her and how she had rocked his world. Even if he never told her.
Ric was stupid. He had an amazing woman who would have done anything for him, but he couldn't get over his own fears of commitment to give her a real chance. It's not that he didn't feel anything for her, because as his best friend I can tell you the man was, and probably still is, in love with her. When she disappeared he went ballistic. He looked everywhere and even went through his list of enemies to be sure none had managed to enter the country undetected, but they were all accounted for and there weren't any of her skips, past or present, which seemed to be after her at the moment.
Bobby, Lester, and I weren't much better. We were up and down Stark Street trying to get information out of anyone we could think of. Bobby even tried to talk to her parents to see if they may have known where she went or if she went of her own free will, but her mother had slammed the door in his face as soon as she saw his black RangeMan uniform.
After six months, we couldn't help but think that she had made herself disappear and she had done a damn good job of it. She hadn't missed any of her trackers on her car, purse, or even the few we had in some of her favorite pieces of jewelry. She hadn't used her credit cards, bank account, or her cell phone. Wherever she was she was hiding well.
I couldn't help but wonder why. What had happened to make her run? Sure, her grandmother had died but she had seemed to be holding up decently against that. She was obviously suffering from the loss, but she had been sure to be with Ranger or Joe for the days after she had passed away. The two of them seemed to be doing a pretty good job of holding her together.
At least now I knew the answer to that. The man who she had known since she was a child and who had claimed to love her, had simply forgotten to go to her grandmother's funeral. Hell, I was dying to be at that funeral with her, so how had he managed to forget it? There wasn't a RangeMan in the building that day that wasn't thinking about her from the time that funeral started until we found out she had disappeared. All of us would have been there in less than a minute if she had wanted us there, but we knew she wouldn't. Stephanie was always trying to be strong in front of us and never wanted us to see her cry.
It had only been seven months after she disappeared that Ric had permanently moved to Miami. I think there were too many memories of her here for him. You could see a haunted look in his eyes that hadn't been there before, and I knew that he now regretted never stepping up with her. I also knew that if she ever came back he would have a serious amount of competition if he decided to try.
Half of the building was at least half in love with her and would have given anything to ask her out, but we were also a brotherhood and Ric had been calling her his woman for years. Most of the men thought that they had a real relationship of some sort and were respecting that. We didn't go behind each other's back and we never stole another brother's woman. However, now it was obvious that either Stephanie had never been his woman or he had done something to seriously hurt her. Now all bets were off and there would be men lining up to take her out if she would allow them.
I would be one of the first in that line.
I knew the moment that little white girl stole my heart. Lula and I had just decided to call it quits when she showed up at RangeMan and demanded I show up at her apartment for dinner that night, so I did.
When I got there she had action movies and pizza waiting. It wasn't a date, but she had wanted to be sure that I was alright after she heard from Lula she was no longer with me. I had never had someone go out of their way before just to be sure that I was alright and from that point on I knew there wouldn't be anything that I wouldn't do for her.
Lula had left me because she couldn't handle being around cats. I never let her know, but the cats that had been at my house were my aunt's cats and I had only been cat sitting. When I saw how she demanded I get rid of them, I knew we wouldn't work out so I had just let her believe they were mine until she walked out.
When we realized Stephanie was gone and Ric finally gave up on searching for her, I refused. I knew that she had gone for a reason, but I also knew if I had disappeared Stephanie would never have stopped searching until she found me. But I never found anything. I had her name out to all my contacts in a bunch of different alphabet agencies, but I never heard a word.
I guess I knew why now. She was a member of an alphabet agency and they protected their own.
When I woke up in the flat in London, I wasn't sure if I was truly awake or if I was still in a drug induced haze. After all, I'd spent three years trying to find her only to have her find me. When she told me she had been living in D.C., I was surprised. It probably wasn't the last place I would think to look, but it also wasn't at the top of my list. I'd always imagined with her love of the ocean that she would find somewhere that was closer to the beach.
When she led us out of England and we arrived at her house in Seattle, I was even more surprised. Stephanie was always so filled with light that it was hard to imagine her living in a place that was constantly grey and overcast, but after she told me why she left it all made sense. She had picked Seattle because it was the exact opposite of Trenton, a place where everything she thought was true turned out to be a lie.
Seeing the pictures of Bobby, Lester, and I on her wall made me realize that while she may have been far away from us she had never forgotten us. Now that I had finally found her I was going to be sure that she never disappeared again.
When she told me she was in the CIA, I was shocked for a moment, but then I could see it. We had always known that Stephanie had amazing instincts and that was something that would definitely help her in the field. She had also always been great at doing distractions because she was always able to slip into the personality of whatever our skip liked. The only thing I had a problem seeing was her working out and using a gun, but I also realized that when Stephanie makes up her mind to do something, there's nothing she can't do.
Later that night when we had sparred I was surprised again. She was good, very good. I was definitely better, but I had also spent the last 15 years in the army and most of that time was in the Special Forces. There weren't many people what could win against me.
I couldn't wait to see how she was with her gun, but I was sure that she'd be great. The CIA has high requirements for their marksmanship.
When we went to bed I made a plan to see if she would allow me to teach her some Krav Maga. I knew it wasn't something the CIA trained the operatives in, and I was hoping it would give her an advantage if something went wrong on our mission. I still wasn't completely sure what we were going to be doing, but I knew that when she took the phone call from Al Fariq she had looked both excited and terrified about whatever the job was that he offered her.
When I crawled in to bed that night I couldn't help but think about how much Stephanie had changed, but how much she was still the same. She still had that light that drew people to her and I could see that she hadn't lost that open and accepting quality she had always been just perhaps a little more cautious. She was also stronger. I could see that she would no longer stand up for the kind of treatment that her mother, Joe, and Ric had always given her. She was more confident in herself now and more self-assured. She didn't need anyone to protect her anymore or to come to her rescue. She was her own person.
I fell asleep wondering if she had found someone new to share her life with, and I couldn't help but notice that when I thought of her with someone else my chest felt a little tighter.
I woke up later that night feeling as if I was being watched. When I opened my eyes I could see Steph standing next to my bed with a haunted look in her beautiful blue eyes. It was a look I knew well. I'd seen out many of my soldiers' faces as well as some of the men I worked with at RangeMan.
I could tell just by that look that she had probably woken up from a nightmare that was real. It was probably something she had actually lived through, and from the look on her face it wasn't good. I lifted the blankets closest to her silently inviting her to sleep with me and she crawled in.
I kissed her on the top of her head and asked if she wanted to talk about it but she silently shook her head no. I put my arm around her and held her close trying to silently comfort her and she was asleep within minutes.
The look on her face was still fresh on my mind as I watched her sleep. I didn't know what had happened to her, but I wished I could have taken the pain of the memory away. I ran my hands absently through her curls trying to reassure her in her sleep that I was still here, and she let out a contented sigh as she snuggled deeper into my embrace.
I loved the feel of her in my arms. I loved the way that her small frame fit so well within my arms. Hell. I loved everything about this woman, but I wasn't sure if she was over Ric. I also wasn't sure that she hadn't been dating anyone else in the last three years.
Ric was also my brother, and I knew that even if he was in some kind of relationship with Rachel right now, he still loved Stephanie Plum. Did that matter? He had his chance with her, and she had even heard him say that he wasn't sure he would ever want to be in a relationship with her. I knew it wasn't because he didn't love her, but instead because he knew he may never be able to open up to her the way that she deserved.
I mentally sighed; he would just have to deal with it. I wouldn't pressure Stephanie, but I would give her options. I knew I loved her, I'd known that she was special since the first time I met her when I was throwing a guy out of a window, and I knew I loved her since she had invited me over to her apartment when Lula and I broke up. I knew without a doubt that I could back off and give Ranger his second chance, but I also knew that Stephanie Plum was one in a million. I could probably spend the rest of my life looking for a girl like her and never find one.
She deserved the world, and I knew I could give that to her. I wouldn't push her and I wouldn't keep her from choosing Ric if that was what she decided, but I also wouldn't just ignore my feelings for her. I would show her what it was like to have a partner who opened up and shared their life instead of closing you out at every turn.
Hopefully, she would choose me.
