Etro's Keepers: A Day in the Life

A/N: And finally the next chapter is here! And early! Whoo! Thanks everyone for your patience.

Grrr FFnet! Stop deleting my formatting and taking out spaces between words! Stop duplicating words! O_o

Please forgive the shameless plug, but for those of you who haven't seen this already, check out my latest video for Lightning Returns (take out the extra spaces and brackets): (w) (w) (w) . (youtube) . (c) (o) (m) / watch?v=1eceNVjvwPY

For those of you who left unsigned reviews, see my replies below:

Riku91 - Thanks for the review. Admittedly, I was a bit worried what people would think of everyone's costumes, specifically Snow, Fang and Vanille's, but everything turned out great in the end. For halloween, I myself cosplayed as the character Tali Zorah from the Mass Effect series of games. It was a lot of fun, which is partially why I wanted to write a halloween themed chapter too. :) On another note, for the longest time, I've been wanting to give Lightning and Serah that sense of closure when it came to their parents. Ever since the first game, that has been nagging at me like an unscratchable itch. I was very happy to finally have sorted that out.

tlrc - Thanks for the review. I can see how Caius could have been interpreted. I specifically didn't want him ruining the fun of things, so I left him out of this chapter despite other people asking for me to bring him back in the series. Fear not readers, you will see Caius again. Eventually. XD

Sage - Thanks for the review. I'm sorry to hear about your grandparents. I hope that you did get your closure with them. *hugs* It was a bit of sad chapter to write, but I feel I really needed to write it. For the characters especially. Thankfully, everything turned out well. :)

MasterPro - Thanks for the review. That kind of sucks, what your mayor did. Oh well. That certainly doesn't stop you for Guising, now does it? XD I haven't given any further thought to what other holidays our favorite heroes (and chibis) will experience, but when I do, I'll certainly consider Thanksgiving. :)

Disclaimer: The characters and the worlds I write in do not belong to me. The stories that I write are intended for entertainment purposes. I do not make any money from them.


*** ~ The Misadventures of Bahamut and Hecatoncheir ~ ***

(featuring the Yun and Dia family chibis)

They were in trouble.

The moment Chibi Bahamut and Chibi Hecatoncheir heard footsteps walking in their direction, they knew they were in so much trouble.

"Huh," Fang's voice said, nearing the bathroom. Chibi Bahamut and Chibi Hecatoncheir were currently inside, Fang and Vanille heading there from the family room.

"Sounds like they're in the dunny. Takin' a shower, maybe?"

Vanille's laugh floated through the air. "I doubt that." Another giggle. "You forget? Hecaton doesn't like water so much."

There was a mad scramble at the door before Fang walked through unhindered. The Pulsian stopped dead in her tracks upon sight of the mini Eidolons.

"Etro... help me."


~ Half an hour ago ~

Chibi Bahamut was bored. The mini dragon sat on the couch, watching as both Fang and Vanille rushed around the place in a panic. Well, Vanille was rushing around in a panic. Fang was rushing around stressed out because Vanille was rushing around in a panic.

"Oh my gosh!" Vanille exclaimed. "I can't believe I forgot that was today!"

Chibi Hecatoncheir watched in mild amusement from the dinner table as his battle practically tore up the house looking for a stray article of clothing.

"What did you do with it, Fang!?" Vanille accused, yanking open the coat closet in search of her quarry. "Did you hide it again?"

"What?" Fang said, visibly offended. "I have done no such thin'! Why would I?"

Vanille gave the other Pulsian a look. "I know very well of your aversion to formal wear, Fang."

"Hey now!" Fang huffed. "Jus' because I don't like dressin' up like a floozy doesn't mean I did anythin' wit' that horrible dress."

The garment in question was not actually a dress, but a more formal looking sari. Just like Lightning, Fang too had a favourite outfit she almost always wore on a daily basis, that being her regular blue silk sari. So when Vanille managed to find something else her partner would wear willingly, the redhead bought it without hesitation, silently patting herself on the back for bringing Fang one step closer towards true womanhood.

After the initial surprise of her choice wore off, because of what it stood for and what it represented, Fang soon grew to hate that new sari with a passion. First of all, it was too much material, hampering her movement (or so she complained often). Second, the patterns printed on it reminded her of a fal'Cie brand. Third, the designers must have killed so many Silver Lobos just for their skin to make this outfit, wasting the rest. And so on, and so on.

The huntress' complaints were unending. It got so bad once that Fang went so far as to hide the sari when another formal event popped up requiring their presence. So why not dispose of the garment? Because of one thing. Vanille. The redhead would know the moment Fang did such a thing, which would leave Fang in even deeper trouble than before.

"So you did think it was horrible!"

Chibi Bahamut sighed.

Today was a very special day. Today was the day one year ago many peoples' lives were changed forever. Today was the anniversary of the day that Cocoon fell out of the sky and the reign of the fal'Cies ended. And to celebrate this occasion, all of Gran Pulse's inhabitants were putting on a grand party, with the former l'Cies as their honoured guests.

Coincidentally, this was one of the few days of the year Vanille could get Fang willingly into a dress. And Vanille was sure as hell not about to let this opportunity slip by. Which is why she was currently tearing their place apart in search of Fang's errant formal wear.

"Of course it's horrible!" Fang said in exasperation. She threw up her hands in frustration. "I don't even know how people walk in that thin' wit'out trippin' on it!"

"But you said you liked that dress when we bought it!" Vanille protested, clearly shocked and hurt by her partner's admission.

Fang flinched, the last surviving Dia's downtrodden look striking her worse than a stab through the heart.

Chibi Bahamut could only sympathize with his battle partner right now. Like Fang, Chibi Bahamut too was not much into the girly things, so to speak. He didn't know how Chibi Hecatonchier did it, survive the girly wrath of Vanille. There were times Vanille would go overboard and dress her battle partner up in really poofy, frilly things. Things which made Chibi Bahamut cringe. But Chibi Hecatoncheir wore it like a champ, and proudly showed off such things, making Vanille smile.

"Vanille, I..."

Tears threatened to fall, Chibi Bahamut wincing at his battle partner's predicament. It wasn't like Fang hated the dress just to spite Vanille. It was simply that their tastes in fashion differed. Thankfully, before the situation could spiral downhill even further, Hope burst through the door in a frazzle.

"Fang! Vanille!" The silver haired boy stopped two steps past the threshold of the front door upon sight of the Pulsians. "Umm... did I... interrupt something?"

Before anyone could answer, a loud roar shattered the awkward air, followed by screaming.

"What in the Maker was that?" Fang exclaimed, already heading towards her lance which was propped up against the wall next to the door.

"That is a Pink Lily rummaging through town," Hope stated calmly, staring outside. Vanille stood next to Hope, her staff in hand.

"Is that-"

"Yes," Hope said, his jaw clenched. "It's the same one as last time."

Fang growled, remembering exactly what happened the last time. So did Vanille, the redhead nearly snarling her words.

"I think it's about time we chased it out for good!" Vanille said, such vehemence in her voice.

Both Fang and Hope looked at her in shock, blinking for a few seconds before they recovered.

"Let's go." Fang nodded in the direction of the door. "I'm hungry for some turtle soup."

A look back at the chibis.

"Yuh two hold down the fort until we get back."


Chibi Bahamut was not impressed. After their battle partners dashed off to save the day like usual, Chibi Hecatoncheir took it upon himself to find Fang's wayward sari. As it turned out, the garment was actually tucked way under one of the lancer's regular blue outfits hanging up in her closet. Chibi Bahamut vaguely remembered that happening because they were out of clothes hangers at the time of purchase. It seemed everyone but Chibi Hecatoncheir forgot about that. Or his friend was just lucky in his search. (It was pretty insane how good Chibi Hecatoncheir was at finding lost objects).

A squeak.

Chibi Hecatoncheir turned to look at Chibi Bahamut. Being just as adverse to silly looking clothes as his battle partner, Chibi Bahamut was not about to let Chibi Hecatoncheir ruin Fang's night tonight. So he asked for the dress.

A shake of the head.

But Chibi Hecatoncheir was not in the mood to share it seemed.

Another squeak.

Chibi Bahamut narrowed his eyes at Chibi Hecatoncheir. The mini earth Eidolon glared back.

Chibi Hectaoncheir shook his head again. He was not going to give up the dress. Vanille loved the dress, especially how it looked on Fang. And he was not about to let Chibi Bahamut make his battle partner cry by ruining the dress like he knew the other chibi wanted to.

The two tiny Eidolons glowered at each other, showdown style.

Chibi Bahamut stood up on Fang and Vanille's bed, squaring his shoulders to Chibi Hecatoncheir. Chibi Hecatoncheir rolled the dress up in his hands like a ball and held it close to his body. He was currently standing on the floor, in front of the Pulsian's shared walk-in closet.

Chibi Bahamut glared harder.

Chibi Hecatoncheir glared harder.

A squeak.

Another squeak.

And then they moved.

Chibi Bahamut switched into gestalt mode and took off towards Chibi Hecatoncheir like a rocket. To his credit, Chibi Hecatoncheir saw the move coming and switched into gestalt mode too, firing dust clouds around him to cover his escape. There was the unspoken rule in the Yun Dia household, one of which prevented the chibis from using their real powers indoor. The duo learned about that rule the hard way, just days after they were dropped off by Etro the first time. The said incident occurred during bath time, one of Gran Pulse's resident household arachnids deciding to pay the chibi earth Eidolon a visit.

Chibi Hecatoncheir would be the first to agree that anything with more than four legs (himself not included), was a very scary sight, one of which Vanille would also attest to. So really, it wasn't his fault for being startled when the small, beady-eyed, multi-legged critter landed on his head. The moment Chibi Bahamut heard Chibi Hecatoncheir's guns going off inside the bathroom instead of water splashes, the mini black dragon immediately zipped inside to his friend's aid, firing off an Umbral Vice.

They levelled the spider, along with the rest of the Yun Dia bathroom in less than a minute.

Vanille was not pleased.

To show her displeasure, the redhead made the chibis repair the bathroom tediously by hand, under her harsh glare, with no powers, until it was back to how it was before. Never again would they allow that to happen. So they used alternate and unorthodox methods of combat.

Chibi Bahamut used the gust of wind which accompanied his Aerial Loop to clear the dust laden air, careful to ensure his razor sharp wings didn't slice through anything they shouldn't have. By the time the dust was blown away, Chibi Hecatonchier was out of sight and long gone. That is, until Chibi Bahamut heard scrambling footsteps tear into the adjoining bathroom. Crimson coloured eyes caught sight of red and green as a blurred form zip through the bathroom doors.

The chase was on.


Chibi Hecatoncheir was in trouble.

The moment he found Fang's formal wear, he should have known better than to tell Chibi Bahamut about it. But how could he not? Chibi Bahamut was his best buddy, his brother. Surely the mini dragon Eidolon would be just as overjoyed as Vanille would be (when she found out later) that he recovered Fang's stray dress?

Nope.

Quite the opposite in fact. Chibi Bahamut was now on the war path, doing everything he could to snatch Fang's dress out of Chibi Hecatoncheir's hands and destroy it. Chibi Hecatoncheir really should have known better than to think the lancer's battle partner would be any different than her. They were like dogs, or so Chibi Hecatoncheir was told. Owner and pet (or in this case, battle partner and chibi Eidolon) often mirrored each other. In more ways than one. It seemed both Fang and Chibi Bahamut shared a disgust for fine fashion. And hence the situation Chibi Hecatoncheir found himself in now.

At the sound of Chibi Bahamut's wings flapping into the bathroom after him, Chibi Hecatoncheir scrambled up the toilet before jumping onto the sink counter top to the left of it. To the left of the sink was a window, and right now, the only means Chibi Hecatoncheir had in escaping his possessed friend. Vanille was going to be overjoyed when she learned he found Fang's dress. And nothing was going to prevent him from seeing her smile again. But it seemed Chibi Bahamut had other ideas.

Something akin to a flash bang grenade went off next to Chibi Hecatoncheir, dazing the earth mini Eidolon. As the multi-armed chibi sought to regain his senses, the dress was tugged from his hands, the sound of Chibi Bahamut's laughing victory echoing in his ears.

Chibi Hecatoncheir was not done yet.

In an act of desperation, Chibi Hecatoncheir blindly grabbed at the air around him, managing to snag something tangible. Chibi Bahamut's tail. The mini dragon squeaked uncharacteristically when he felt a yank. Turning to look back over his shoulder, he found Chibi Hecatoncheir, holding onto his tail for all he was worth. Chibi Bahamut roared, swivelling left and right in the air trying to lose his annoyance, flapping his wings hard. In his distraction, the mini dragon Eidolon forgot all about what was in front of him and the duo, along with Fang's dress, careened head first into the bag of supplies left on the sink's opposite corner. Fang and Vanille had just come back from grocery shopping, setting down the supplies on the sink counter for unpacking. They never got that far for the emergency happened and before that, the frantic search for Fang's dress.

CRASH!

Bottles of shampoo and conditioner, tubes of toothpaste and a bottle of bleach went flying, everything falling into a scattered heap on the bathroom floor. Amongst them was Chibi Bahamut and Chibi Hecatoncheir, and Fang's formal sari.

An annoyed squeak.

Chibi Bahamut huffed in annoyance, pushing a tube of toothpaste off of his head. He glared at Chibi Hecatoncheir, the other mini Eidolon half buried under a bottle of Chocobolina Whoo Hoo shampoo. That was the actual name of the shampoo, yes.

Another squeak, this one angry.

Chibi Hecatoncheir kicked the bottle of shampoo off of himself and glared back at the mini dragon Eidolon. If Chibi Bahamut thought he was going to pin all the blame for this one on him, he had another thing coming to him.

WHACK!

Chibi Bahamut blinked in complete shock, his mouth hanging open in surprise. Chibi Hecatoncheir smirked. The tiny dragon Eidolon couldn't believe what just happened. The other chibi had thrown a shampoo bottle at him. Chibi Hecatoncheir had thrown the Chocobolina Whoo Hoo shampoo bottle at him!

The plastic shampoo bottle itself, while taller than both Eidolons and just as heavy, bounced off of Chibi Bahamut's head without causing injury. But that wasn't the point. Chibi Hecatoncheir had thrown the bottle at him. And that was a declaration of war! So, over the course of the next five minutes, the Yun Dia bathroom was the battlefield of all out war.

Bottles of shampoo were thrown, only to be sliced in half. Tubes of toothpaste were hurled into the air, only to be shot down. And the bottle of bleach, it erupted like a geyser in Sulyya Springs when hit simultaneously by both Chibi Hecatoncheir's and Chibi Bahamut's signature moves. Screw the rules. When one's pride was at stake, it was better to shoot first and ask forgiveness later.

Five minutes and one second later, both mini Eidolons were left huffing, still glaring at each other. For another ten seconds, they remained so before both of them burst out laughing, only now having a good look at the other. Lines of blue and pink toothpaste streaked across the earth Eidolon's many arms, a glop of orange shampoo hanging off the side of Chibi Hecatoncheir's head like a wet, out of place toupee. Chibi Bahamut on the other hand, was almost fully covered with bright neon yellow shampoo, as if it were a second skin membrane of sorts, with a blob of green toothpaste sticking to his cheek. All in all, they both looked ridiculous.

Chibi Bahamut squeaked, nodding his head. It was a good fight and they were evenly matched. Chibi Hecatoncheir squeaked back, smiling proudly.

Then the door to the Yun Dia house opened and in followed the mini Eidolon's battle partners.

Fang exhaled loudly. "Thought that'd never be over!" The Pulsian flopped down on the couch, Kain's Lance propped up against the wall again.

A giggle. "We showed him, huh?" Vanille was beaming with accomplishment. She plopped down on the couch next to Fang and cuddled up against her.

"Yeah," Fang said, wrapping an arm around Vanille's shoulders. She winced slightly, her body sore from their bout with the Pink Lily. "Say, where do ya suppose the lil' ones got ta?"

"I don't know," Vanille said looking around the living room.

It was then Chibi Hecatoncheir squeaked, calling attention to both himself and Chibi Bahamut in the bathroom. But just as the sound left his lips, he froze, remembering what state he, Chibi Bahamut and the bathroom was in. Not to mention... Oh Etro... Fang's dress...

Chibi Bahamut followed Chibi Hecatoncheir's gaze and whooped in triumph. The chibi Eidolons faired very well considering the state of Fang's dress. Covered in shampoo, toothpaste, and bleach, the garment spotted a tie-dye sort of look with gloppy accessories. Not only did Fang and Vanille's brands of shampoos clean gunk out of hair, it washed out the colour from dresses, to varying degrees, as well. Fang would be pleased with his efforts, for Chibi Bahamut had successfully accomplished what he had set out to do. Then the rest of the bathroom came into view and Chibi Bahamut looked up to meet Chibi Hecatoncheir's gaze.

"Huh," Fang said, making her way towards the bathroom. "Sounds like they're in the dunny. Takin' a shower, maybe?"

Vanille laughed, walking next to her partner. "I doubt that," she said. The redhead giggled. "You forget? Hecaton doesn't like water so much."

The chibis started to panic, Chibi Hecatoncheir because of the state of the bathroom and Fang's dress, and Chibi Bahamut because of the state of the bathroom. Neither chibi had any desire to explain to their battle partners why the ceiling, walls and floor now sported shampoo, toothpaste and bleach as the new paint. If it was just them, they could get away with it. But for the rest of the bathroom, they could not.

As both sets of footsteps stopped at the open door, two things happened simultaneously. Chibi Bahamut scrambled to slam the door shut and Chibi Hecatoncheir nabbed Fang's ruined dress off the floor and dunked it in the toilet (the sink was too high and it would have taken too long to turn on the water). Unfortunately, Chibi Bahamut failed and wiped out at Fang's feet instead, having slipped on a glob of shampoo at the very last second.

"Etro... help me."

Both Chibi Bahamut and Chibi Hecatoncheir looked up at their battle partners, smiling wearily as they did their best to feign innocence. They were in so much trouble.


As punishment for her battle partner's misdeeds, Fang was forced to wear the ruined dress (Vanille threw it into the washing machine and into dryer shortly afterwards) to the anniversary event. To everyone's surprise, it was a big hit with the people, Cocoonians soon after adopting Fang's unique fashion sense into the next current fad for clothing. There were multiple offers even, for the lancer to pose as a model in the next fashion show, to be held in the coming weeks. Fang politely declined all them of course, the embarrassment of wearing such a thing only for it to turn out to be a big hit not something she wanted to repeat.

As for Chibi Bahamut and Chibi Hecatoncheir, they were forgiven for their little mishap.

That is, until their next adventure.


A/N: I hope you all enjoyed that chapter. Lol. Some of you were wondering about that whole "Sari and the Toilet" incident and here you have it. XD

For those of you who don't know, dunny is another word for bathroom.