Author's Note: Some somewhat exciting news, this is the longest chapter I've written so far, It was 20 pages long while the usual ones were 10/12 I think.
Anyway, I'm really excited for you guys to meet the new OC in this chapter He may be one of my favorites to write so far. I just found him really intriguing to write.
Oh and BTW; Cair's name is supposed to be pronounced as tire. Only with a k instead of a t, (k-ire)
because it's Evish, which reminds me, no I don't own the rights to the Elvish language that was created by J.R.R. Tolkien.
Oh an before I forget; 'No I do not, nor do I claim to; own the rights to the song; I'm Only Me When I'm With You by Taylor Swift'
And thanks again to; Dancing-Souls for being a continual reviewer for me:) and bbymojo.
Also the poll is now up on my profile to vote on whether or not you guys want the playlist for this story posted.
(Gee I'm rambling a lot today.)
One last thing, if you guys could would you mind checking out my other Hunger Games fics and giving me some reviews?
And I do advice you guys to read the prequel songfic; 'The Tragedy of a Pearl' it will give some background insight to this story
Well, now that all that's done, onto the story.
Chapter 7: A Boy I Used to Know
I'm Only Me When I'm With You, By Taylor Swift:
I don't have to hide my tears, secrets are my biggest fears
Through it all nobody gets me like you do
And you know everything about me
And I'm only me when I'm with you
Our apartment is huge to say the least. When we get in I quickly go to my assigned room and change out of my ridiculous flimsy costume thankfully find my closet is not full of dress. Actually to my pleasant surprise everything is just my style, I pull out a red top, black skinny jeans, and leather boots. Thankfully the temperature's warmer in our apartment so I just go without a jacket.
I sit a the dinner table across from Mags and Finnick trying hard not to yawn as dinner is brought out, the servant a young boy about my age, Must be an Avox I think, places the plates down in front of me I look up to see he has a very familiar face, bronze skin typical of District Four, hair that's a light shade of brown tinted by permanent golden glints of sunlight , his eyes are sad and cold, as they catch my gaze for a sliver of a second. Do I know him?
He looks away quickly making an obvious effort to finish his job quickly.
I catch Finnick's eyes on me, looking at me quizingly, but I'm not paying much attention, my mind is being brought back in time when I had just turn ten,
I was sitting on port side of the boat staring at the colorful reef below, my best friend Cair at my side. "How far down do ya think it'd take to reach the bottom," I heard my ten-year old self ask.
Cair's father had taken us out their family's little fishing vessel on one of his rounds, it took much convincing my mother before she let me go, because her strange fear of the sea but somehow Cair and I had managed it.
"I donno," he said, leaning over the rail with me. "But wouldn't your mother be in a fit if she found out you went into the ocean."
I leaned back, he was probably right. "Why weren't you at school today Cai?"
He mumbles something I can't quiet hear, I ask him to repeat it but still it's muffled finally he says, and a bit too loudly. "I wrote 'I hate the Capitol on my paper!' There you happy!"
I quickly shove my hand over his mouth, our parents had told us numerous time how dangerous it is to go around blurting stuff like that out loud, and Ciar just blurted it out loud and clear for all of District Four to hear.
We both sunk below the rail pressing low to the ground, as if it would hide us somehow from the open sky above.
A few moments had passed and my heart slowed to a reasonable beat, I slap my hand to my head shaking my head. "Cair, you are the biggest idiot in Four I have ever known."
He punched me in the arm and I shoved him back, how I miss those days.
I smiled at him, and he grinned back. "Cair, Alanna? Are you two behaving yourselves? I heard his father call from over his back, not bothering to turn around as he cast the woven net into the sea.
"Yes Dad!" Cair shouted.
I sorely wondered what it would be like to have a father, mine died before I could talk, I sometimes imagined what he'd be like if he was still here…
"You okay, Lannie?" Cair asks me.
I nod looking over the rail. "What's that there," I say, pointing my finger at the dam.
Cair peers over my shoulder. "Looks like a hole in dam."
I stare at the concrete wall imagining what's beyond. "Wonder what's out there, beyond the dam I mean."
Cair ruffles my brown messy hair. "You're too curious for your own good, Lannie."
Maybe so, but an adventure like this is great to leave unhad.
I swing my leg over the metal railing, when a hand reaches out to me and yanks me back."What are you doing?"
"Come on," I say now sitting on the edge, "don't you ever wonder what's out there Cair?"
"Yeah sure I do but-"
"Then come on," I say, jumping off into the water. It takes him a few minutes to agree but here we were on the other side of the dam minutes later, splashing around till we spotted a little island a ways off we pulled ourselves up on the shore, lying there on the sand letting the rays of the golden sunset us off. Cair picks up a shell and hands it to me, it's a beautiful blue, all the shades of the ocean mixed into one, I giggle and thank him putting my ear to it.
"What can you hear?" he asks.
"The ocean, our ocean."
He looks at me confused.
"The waves out here have a different a sound, like ringing bells listen," I say, holding the shell to his ear.
I will never forget that day, not long after Cair and his father had to move away for reasons I never found out. All I knew was how empty I felt inside, from then on I always kept to myself, I had no friends nor did I want any they'd simply grow close and then up and leave me just like Cair.
I stare at the boy across the room, a tear at the edge of my eyes. So that's what became of him I think, but what happen to his father? The boy I'd grown up with trusted with my secrets resulted to this! A mere slave to the Capitol. I badly wanted to rush to his arms hold him tightly, a strand of home in this dark terrifying place.
"Cair?" I whisper just loud enough for him to catch his name being uttered from my lips, he turns his head his eyes boaring into mine, the smallest smile pricks his face.
"Seashell!" I turn around to see Odair still staring at me looking somewhat agitated.
What! I mouth.
He rolls his eyes and says slowly, as if he's said this for the hundredth time. "Your dinner, is getting as cold, as an ice cube." He motions me to eat something.
I pick up the fork, poking it around, but I really have no appetite. At least, not anymore. My hair falls in my plate but I don't really care. I place fork back down sighing. "I'm not hungry."
"You need to eat something dear, training starts tomorrow and you're as thin as a pick," Mags tells me.
I try to eat a little but have a hard time swallowing.
"Speaking of training," says Odair, picking up his glass, "we need to start working strategies."
What strategies?
"Like," I insist.
"Like your image. How we're going to pass you off in the interviews; how you'll act during training. I'd advice showing off if you want an alliance with the Careers. Otherwise, lay low and stick to stations you know nothing about." He takes another drink.
Stop watching his every move I tell myself, he's going to think you actually like him!
"Which brings up another thing. Both Mags and I need to know what your skills are if we're going to plan this out."
I sit there quiet, not saying anything. I know he's expecting me to start rambling on, but no way am I letting 'Mr. Attitude of a killer Shark' over there know what I'm good at. Honestly I'm not even sure what I'm good at, since I've never trained like the rest of the kids in our district have.
Riptide breaks the silence by immediately going on about how good he is with a sword and how he's top of his class in training, running lifting weights. When Mags asks him his weaknesses he of course says 'nothing'.
"How about you Seashell?" Odair asks me.
I can tell Riptide's smirking at me and I can help but catch the word 'runt'. I cross my arms in front of him, "I'm not sayin' anything with him in earshot," I say, nodding to Riptide.
"Why," he smirks at me, "embarrassed Odair'll find out you can't do anything?"
I'm glaring daggers at him clutching the knife on the table."You're gonna find out what I'm capable of in a minute if you don't shut up!"
I can't resist hurling the knife at the wall, it lodges in the painting hanging on it, right through the ship's mainsail. This is mild compared to what I can really do though.
"Finnick dear," Stella's high squeaky voice chirps, "the recaps have started, come watch!"
I watch him roll those sea-green eyes, as Stella struts into the dining room in those tiny heels of hers. I just now realize she wasn't at dinner. I think about it; does that girl ever eat? She's thinner than me, and that, by the way, is saying something.
"Stella," I say, "aren't you going to eat anything?"
She waves me away. "Oh, no, I already ate at breakfast this morning."
Which was at seven A.M. Approximately twelve hours ago.
I shake my head, capitol people sheesh.
" Alright, we're coming." Finnick gets up holding out his hand to me. What? Like I can't get up myself. He stares at me with those sea-colored eyes until I cave in.
"Ever the charming prince," I mutter sarcastically.
I sneak one look back to see Cair has mysteriously disappeared.
We're all gathered around the gigantic screen watching the replays of tonight, and lucky me I got stuck sitting in between, yes you guessed it Riptide and Odair.
In my honest opinion the costumes this year look pretty bland. District One is on the scene first wearing millions of gems and jewels and sporting blue and purple hair. I laugh to myself, they actually let their stylists dye their hair?
Next is District Two, looking as ruthless as ever. I can't help but mentally shutter at the sight of the boy tribute, he's a monster! He must be well over six feet tall. And with that sword in his hand he looks ready to kill. It's then I notice the blood dripping from the blade (whether it's fake or not I'll never know.) he's dressed in nothing but black pants that are inlaid with chain mail ringlets.
I most definitely do not want to come across him in the arena. I'd be dead in a second, and I don't want think in what cruel sadistic way he'd kill me either.
I feel Odair's arm go around me, pulling me closer. I try in vain to shake him off. I sigh grudgingly, I do actually feel a little safer.
"Scared, Cove?" I hear Riptide smirk.
I would answer but I'm too busy shaking.
"She has every right to be," Odair spits back. "And if you had any sense you would be too."
My gaze shoots to Finnick. Since when did he assume the role of trying to defend me?
"I'm not scared." I growl, upset with looking weak in front of the enemy. I leap from the couch and slump in a chair.
Riptide just scoffs. "Yeah, right Cove, and the waves don't crash on the shore every day from sunrise till dusk. Abernathy's was right, you're a terrible liar."
I growl at him then look back at the screen catching a glimpse of the girl as they ride by. She is not as tall as the boy but looks just as threatening, with her cold hard face, crow black hair, and blood red lips. She's dressed in attire similar to that of her district partner a crop chain mail top with a tiny skirt and chains hanging off them and black gladiator shoes, a knife notched in her belt.
District Three's up and I have to overt my eyes from the screen, they're wear nothing but electrical wires! It's common knowledge that Three's main export is technology but gees show some decency.
Then there's us, I hide my face in my hands I cannot watch this! The roar coming the crowd drowns out anything and everything else. But wait, where is that sound of oceans waves coming from? I look at our golden chariot, the horses look gorgeous if nothing else. Like water horses just come from the sea, their white coats glistening with blue flecks and gold. I always have has an odd thing for horses.
I stare at the screen in disbelief, I actually didn't make a fool of myself? (Well aside from the fact I am blushing like an idiot but I think the glare covered that.)I still hate my costume but I can't help but admire the realistic water cascading down my skirt. I watch Riptide leaning in whispering in my ear. Oh great now everyone's going to think there's something going on!
I don't know how I didn't hear him but he's there with his head over my shoulder before I get a chance to jerk away."Hm, well, I definitely know angle we're goin' for with you Seashell."
I twist around shooting him a confused look.
"Fierce and attractive," he says the last word with a purr, the vibration still echoing in my ear.
I roll my eyes, "Oh please, I am not!"
Finnick fake gasps. "You mean you don't see it, darling," he says in a mock capitol accent. "You're the Sea Goddess of Panem, they'll be screaming your name after to night!"
I honestly can't help but laugh, "You heard that?"
He throws up his hands. "How could I not he was telling everyone in the stadium."
I sink my face into my hands, just great!
He comes around in front of me, gently removes a strand of hair that has fallen in front of my face, "He was right though, Seashell."
We both end up staring at each other for several seconds.
"Oh will you two just get a room!" Riptide snaps.
Odair starts laughing as I shriek, "what ew!"
I glare at Odair and punch him in the arm. "That is not funny!"
I shoot my gaze in Riptide's direction. "And you, you're just low and disgusting!"
He rolls his. "Please, like he isn't thinkin' it."
Both of us are glaring, me at Finnick and Finnick at him.
"I think we should all go to bed." Mags interrupts our little staring contest. "It's late, and both of you need your sleep."
Strange as it seems I had completely forgotten I was even tired, I suppose the sudden adrenaline of anger woke me up.
With a last look in my direction Riptide shoots me a wink. "See ya in the morning, Princess."
Princess!? I'm use to him calling me all sorts of names, but princess? I shake my head, where did he get that one?
I say good night to Mags as they leave, then pull myself out of the chair and go to my room, forgetting to close my door.
There's the thud of the door slamming behind me and I jerk around to see Finnick leaning against the door, his hands crossed in front of him.
"So, spill it."
For a moment I wonder what on earth he could mean…
I list everything off the top of my head, "I'm fast, I'm good at camouflage I can swim, I can climb anything, I'm good with a knife, and I'm clever enough to stay alive so far." I plop down on the bed, I can't help but say the bit with a smirk.
"And?" he asks.
I take a deep breath. "I've never trained, I stink at throwing spears, I'm small, skeletons creep me out, the color orange makes me nauseous." I honestly can't of anything else to add.
I watch him, his eyes trained ahead on the wall completely void of emotion, is he pleased or stressed that he's got nothing to work with? Finally he speaks and even though it's in a hushed tone it seems as if his voice fills the whole room. "When you go down for training tomorrow make sure One and Two have you on their radar, show em' what you got and don't be afraid to throw a few winks."
I spring from the bed, "Wo, hold on a minute! Who said I wanted to get in with the Careers anyways."
He just replies calmly, "You're from District Four, that's what everyone's expecting."
I roll my eyes. "Well, in case you haven't noticed, I don't exactly fall under the normal category." Then I add. "Plus they're cruel and sadistic, who hunts down people and kills them for fun!"
Finnick looks me straight in the eyes and smirks. "That's the rules of the game, sweetheart, kill or be killed."
Well what if I don't want to be a murderer!?
I cross over to the opposite side of the bed staring out at the large glass window.
Realization must have hit him because I hear him groan as he says, "Oh don't tell me you're one of those types!"
I twist around. "One of what?"
He rolls his eyes and says in a mocking tone. "The tribute who throws their life away right of the bat because they can't actually bring themselves to fight to save their worthless life."
I huff. "Well, sorry, but murder wasn't exactly on my list of things to accomplish before I die."
He shrugs. "Things change when you're in there, values become less important than impulse to survive. Or at least they will, if you ever want to see your family again."
I fiddle with the hem of my shirt, there's odd, dead silence, just sitting and more silence until-
"Finnick, Finnick dear where are you," Stella chirps passing right by my door.
He sighs and pushes himself up off my bed. "Get some sleep, I'll see you in the morning." And then he leaves.
I stare out at the window, the pool of darkness outside, the same darkness that will envelope my vision as I take my last breath. I wonder what's like to die, does it hurt? Did it hurt when my mother and father died? At least I'll be able to see them again.
I collapse to the floor, what am I going to do?
I felt someone sit down next to me, at first I though it was Odair but no. Cair holds me in his arms and I start to cry, he's the only one who's ever seen me cry, which was only once when my pet fish Fishy died (I was five o.k., give me some credit!)
I wipe my tears, say I'm fine. But he knows I'm not.
And then I break down again saying I'm sorry as if what happened to him, what the Capitol did to him is somehow my fault.
He just shakes his head.
I hand him a piece of paper and pencil, "If you can't talk out loud you can at least write it down right."
There's a light in his eyes, as if some one has opened the door to his cell of silence. He hands me the paper when he's done,
I'm sorry I left you, we should have never have gone.
"Why did you leave?" I say out loud.
He writes:
My father got a job in the Capitol, one of his friends was a victor, it's complicated.
I can't help but wonder what Cair did, why he's a mute, knowing him he always was prone for getting into trouble but that was usually after I pushed him into it.
"What… happened," saying 'what did you do to get your tongue cut out' seems a bit harsh.
Let's just say you rubbed off on me.
There's something he's not telling me, but I don't ask, if he won't tell me it's for a good reason, so I let the matter go.
I yawn loudly, I guess my exhaustion has come back.
There's a bemused smile on his face,
You need to go to bed.
I nod, "I know, I've been up since 6. Being put on display for the whole country to see really takes a lot out of a person I guess,"
I change in the bathroom then climb into bed, he hands me the note and pencil about to leave but I grab his arm before he goes and hand him the note;
I really missed you.
He motions for the pencil the hands both back smiles at me and leaves. I look down at the note;
Me too.
