Chapter Seven: In which Much Confusion There is.
(Also Known as: In which Common is Truly Common)

-x-

Zita awoke to the sudden lurching of a ship and her immediatly emptying her stomach.

"Really human?" a voice uttered some obscenities that made her blush slightly, "Must you do that on the
upholstery?"

"Z...zim?"

He sighed, "Of course Zita-stink, it IS in fact the amazing Zim whose ship's seating you evacuated your inferior organs on." he sounded rather POed.

"Wha-the collar..." she felt around on her neck, there was nothing!

"Took it off. Stupid clunky thing was in the way of your breathing. Now you have a Vortian control chip on your neck so don't think about running away..." Zim said, his antennae perking as the thought of escape crossed Zita's mind, almost as if he could hear her think. "Now why would you go and do that? Are you THAT stupid? Even the PAK-less smeets know not to go near the D'thir!"

She was still a bit shocked by her waking up alive, without a collar, and IN ZIM'S SHIP! She struggled to retort smartly and failed, "Yeah, well...I'm not a PAK-less smeet, I'm a HUMAN GIRL! How was I supposed to know that the Darkness would try to eat me?"

"You were just s'posed to!" Zim's argument lost all coherency, "If anything happened to you I'd have to go back and buy a wei'kap for the Tallest!"

"Oh, so the entire 'MINE' thing was just a crock?" she was livid and just blurted the first thing that came to mind.

"That meant...not you...the Tallest..." Zim suddenly couldn't speak, a dark blush spreading across his high cheekbones. "What I say is of no business of yours!"

"And what I say is-?"

"Nothing, nothing to Zim but the blathering of a slave."

"Ah...and your promise to teach me Common was-"

"A truth. It reflects bad on me if a slave cannot speak Common. Watch this." he punched a button on the Voot and the computer grumbled.

[WATCH IT...COULD YOU BE A BIT MORE GENTLE?...]

"Quiet. Just play the video..." he leaned back and closed his eyes in angry contempt, "Zim will take a nap until you are learned."

"Fine!" Zita faced the screen as a bunch of words began to travel across the screen.

'If you are reading this then you are a lucky member of the slaves of the Irken race!' she read dryly. 'This means, as is expected of all other slaves, you must learn Galactic Common.

'Now, if you have no idea what Galactic Common is then you are of a backwards race and therefore are exceedingly stupid.' Zita frowned at that comment, stupid-no...ignorant-maybe. 'So...without too much further ado, Galactic Common for Enslaved Races!'

-x-

Zim tossed and turned in his sleep, having thoughts and dreams that made his 'spooch squirm and growl like when he ate bad Vort-dogs. Why HAD he said 'MINE'? Was it because he thought of the human as his or was it because he had spent so much time with the humans on Earth that he thought of them as his personal race? Or was it simply a slip of the PAK? He was confused.

He rolled over and someone poked him, whispering something in Common.

"Zim saa'kaan? Eruiiishu'sak kaareken. Aalu, aalu!" Zim sir? The video is done. Wake, wake!

His PAK finally warmed up and he groaned as the translation interface kicked in, "Nooo...still sleepy...g'way..."

"Not until you get up." Uurgh, the voice wouldn't go away...

"No...m'sleeping...lemme' dream..."

There was a sigh, maybe the voice gave up...then- "Computer, wake him up please..."

[OKAY] there was a short 'zzzt' sound and then Zim leapt up screaming as hundreds of volts shot through his PAK in order to wake him.

"Sweet mother of Irk!" he hissed as he rubbed his singed back, wincing as small sparks of electricity shot through his torso. "What in all-?" he paused.

Zita was looking at him with the most amused expression ever, "You talk when you sleep you know..."

"What Zim does in his sleep is none of your buisness little wei'kap." he folded his arms in indignant pouting.

"Ah...wei'kap...'one who is in service of'" her lips turned at the corners and she got this sneaky look on her face.

"Finished the video?"

"Chakaa dekir. Rekaaskin?"

"Watch your tongue. The Tallest can deal with a mute slave if that's all there is and Zim will NOT tolerate being called that." he glares at her, magenta orbs mere slits.

She stuck out her tongue at him and then curled up in the corner, "Now if you'll excuse me, I NEED to sleep." she closed her eyes and began breathing softly and evenly as she fell into the grasp of dreams

Zim watched her with obscene fascination, 'She NEEDS to sleep...I almost forgot about that...' he hugged his knees to his chest, 'The human race is definitely one of the oddest races I've ever met...' They just sat there like that for a while, the ship soaring past the moons of Alpha Centauri and other planets for a while. Then Zita began muttering in her sleep, tossing and turning like she was being chased.

"Computer! What's wrong with her?"

[SHE APPEARS TO BE HAVING A VIOLENT NIGHTMARE]

She squirmed some more, "N-no...momma...my momma..."

Zim leaned over her and shook her gently, "Human, human...wake up!"

She jolted awake and immediately began to scream and convulse when she lay eyes on Zim, "N-no...get away! Don't hurt me! Leave me alone! Monster...momma..."

He backed away, a slight hurt look on his face, "Why does she react in that way?..."

[WHEN I SCANNED HER TO DETERMINE HER HEALTH WHILE SHE WAS UNCONCIOUS, I FOUND OUT THAT SHE SUFFERS FROM PTS-INDUCED XENOPHOBIA]

"Eh?..." his eyes never left the small shivering form on the ground, "what's 'xenophobia'?"

[XENOPHOBIA: THE INTENSE FEAR OF ALIENS. CHARACTERIZED BY INTENSE PANIC ATTACKS, TENSING OF MUSCLES WHEN NEAR AN ALIEN, INCREASE OF BLOOD PRESSURE, AND POSSIBLE MENTAL SCARRING]
the computer recited, [WHEN YOU TOOK OVER THE EARTH, THE SHOCK OF WATCHING AN ALIEN KILL ALL HER LOVED ONES MUST'VE BROUGHT UPON THE XENOPHOBIA. IF YOU NOTICED WHEN YOU PICKED HER UP, WHEN YOU GOT NEAR HER SHE STARTED TO SWEAT EXCESSIVELY AND HER PUPILS DIALATED AND SHE BEGAN TO TENSE UP. WHEN SHE WOKE UP FROM A NIGHTMARE PROBABLY REENACTING THE END OF HER WORLD, SEEING YOU MUST'VE TRIGGERED AN INTENSE PANIC ATTACK...THE BEST THING TO DO IS WAIT IT OUT AND LET HER SLEEP]

He stared at her confused while she shivered violently and muttered, "monster...go away...momma...momma...save me..."

'Why does this bother me, that this human be terrified of me...why does watching this girl shake in fear of something I did make the nether-regions of my 'spooch ache?...' he sighed and watched her some more as her breathing evened out again and her face relaxed into a smile. 'I couldn't possibly CARE for her...she belongs to my Tallest...she isn't anything to me...' but he couldn't convince himself of that lie, no matter how many times he repeated it.