"Pretty please Sasori?" He pinched the bridge of his nose, "Fine!" He handed me the tiny packet and wouldn't let go until he gave me a warning, "Just do NOT use this on my brat. Understand?" I just grinned, "I'm not going to I promise."
He finally let it go and whispered in my ear before I left, "I do expect my payment by tonight." "I know! I know!" Sheesh! I hurried towards the kitchen to put my plan into action.
I want to have fun with that 'obedient baby drug' too. The question was: who's going to be my baby boy? I thought this out thoroughly and narrowed down my choices. Deidara and Tobi suffered enough, same for Hidan, Sasori and Zetsu. That leaves three.
Let's see, Itachi wouldn't fall for it. Kakuzu….uh….I want to, yet….what'll happen to me afterwards? Didn't like the thought and the same went for Kisame but, it HAS to be one of them two though.
I put a LOT of thought into it and decided: KISAME! Hate to say this but Kakuzu would freak me out acting like a toddler. Now, how to get my prey to take the drug?
*I walked into the kitchen and fortune was on my side. Kisame was sitting alone at the table reading the paper. "Hey Kisame." "Hey." I pretended to head for the fridge when he asked, "Can you get me glass of orange juice Olivia, since you're already there."
"Sure." This was TOO easy! I'm glad that I'd already opened up the packet before I came in here. I poured the powder and juice at the same time to avoid making a mistake (have no idea if it can be tasted if it wasn't stirred).
"Here you go." "Thanks." Damn, he chugged the whole glass until it was empty already, "AH, that hit the spot." Victory is mine! It wasn't even a minute when I noticed a change in his behavior. He did too and looked at the glass before glaring at me, "I'm going to kill…."
His expression went totally blank and didn't finish his sentence. I got worried from that reaction. Sasori did give me the right drug I hope. I went over and gently shook him, "Kisame?" "Hmm?" "Are you ok?"
A big grin creeped up on his face, "Kisame fine, why pretty lady ask?" Yep, that's the correct drug all right. This is going to be SO MUCH FUN!
*Pretty lady! I pinched his cheek, "That's so cute!" He just kept grinning and asked, "Are you my mommy?" I choked back a laugh and ruffled his hair, "Yes I am, but my boy can just call me Olivee ok?" "K!"
I took his hand and led him into the hall where we bumped into Sasori. "Olivia?" "Yes." "Please don't tell me you did it to Kisame." An evil grin popped up on my face, "Ok I won't. Kisame, you remember who this is don't you?"
"Kisame knows, that's Uncle Sasori." "He's such a good boy isn't he?" Sasori's eye twitched and he walked away without a word. No doubt he's going to tell the others. "Olivee?" "Yeah?" "Kisame bored." "Aww, then let's get you a toy." "YAY!"
He happily bounced behind me when we got the storage room and I managed to fish out the legos, coloring book, crayons, and a few stuff animals. He was very excited and I led him into my room to play with them.
"You sit in here and play while mommy gets a snack." He nodded as I kissed him on the forehead. When I left and grabbed me a bag of chips I couldn't believe how cute he was acting like he is. "Olivia!"
Uh-oh. "Yes." Itachi glared and made me sit on the couch, "What's this I hear about you drugging my lover?" "He'll be ok." "That may be but you could've asked my permission first." "Why? No one asks my permission when they want to drug or who knows what with my lovers, or myself for that matter!"
"Hey, is it fucking true?" Hidan came in with the others with a huge grin. "Olivia, did you actually do that to Kisame?" "YES, YES I DID!" Tobi sat next to me, "Tobi never thought Olivee could be so sneaky."
The room got loud with questions until my boy broke the silence. He came flying in, holding up a picture that he colored, "Look what I did mommy!" So much for being called Olivee. I acted very surprised, "It's so pretty. You did such a good job baby!" He grinned from ear to ear and as my luck would have it, the others ruined it.
Talk about gapping mouths and total distraught faces staring at Kisame. It didn't last long when Hidan, Deidara, and Tobi burst out laughing. "HOLY FUCKING JASHIN!" "Did he really just call her mommy un?" "Tobi can't believe his ears!"
The others remained silent with faint smirks. Hidan snatched the coloring book and plops an arm around Deidara, "Just look, it's a fucking rainbow too!" "Not only that, a cute wittle pink bunny un!" Those two were laughing so hard that their faces went pure red and tear stained.
"Give it back." Deidara teasingly hands it out, but when Kisame went to take it he snatched it back. I scowled, "Cut it out you two!" Hidan repeated the action and they laughed even more as Kisame pursed his lips. SMACK! He hit both of them and ran out the room in….believe it or not….tears.
"OW!" "Damn that hurt un!" "Serves you two right for teasing him like that." I stomped off after him with Tobi on my heels, "Olivee, calm down. They were just having some fun; it's rare to see him act like that."
I glared at Tobi, who shrank back with hunched shoulders. "That's no damn excuse to tease him, even if he's not in his right state of mind."
I found that Kisame locked himself in the bathroom and knocked on the door, "Kisame?" "Go away!" "Come on baby, open the door so mommy can come in." "NO!" "Why?" I waited for a response when I heard him shuffle to the door, "Mommy mad at Kisame now."
"No I'm not, why would I be?" "Kisame was bad and hit them." "It's ok, they deserved it. You actually did mommy a favor of doing it herself." Click. The door slowly opened with a pouting Kisame peeking around the corner, "Really?" "Yes, now come here and give mommy some love."
He practically jumped on me and I ended up almost being crushed on the floor. "Olivee!" Tobi managed to haul Kisame up with coaxing. "Is Olivee ok?" I groaned as Tobi helped me up, "Wow. I think I saw my life flash before my eyes."
Tobi murmured, "Be more careful Olivee." "Is mommy ok?" I smiled at him, "Yes I'm fine," and then led Kisame back to my room. "What you doing Olivee?" "My baby needs his pacifier!" "WHAT!"
*I shut the door and sat on the bed with my back against the wall. The others are rubbing off on me terribly considering what I'm about to do. I exposed my breasts, "Come here Kisame, time for your pacifier."
He hopped over with a smile and gently took a nipple too suck on. I bit back a moan from the tender sucks; he was compelled to play with the neglected one. I drifted my eyes shut but ended up snapping them back open with a groan, "Be careful with those teeth Keesy."
(Nickname I came up with and pronounced: kee – c.)
I let him continue as he switched back and forth for about ten minutes before I couldn't take it anymore. I gently pushed him away and down on his back. He pouted and crossed his arms, "Keesy wasn't done yet."
"I know, but mommy has something special for her boy." "Oooh, what?" "It's a surprise." I reached down and undid his pants to expose his already hardened member. "Wha…..oooooooh!"
He never finished when I suckled on the head and stroked him; he fidgeted wildly and it was difficult to keep him still. "Ah, ah….mommy~" I quickened the strokes and sucked a tad bit harder, making him moan even louder. He sounds like an uke right now.
He bucked his hips up a lot and tensed with a loud moan when he came; that was quick! I pulled back and spit all the cum out in the trash bin as my boy rode the waves of his orgasm all the way out. I fixed my shirt and started to stroke his hair, "Did that feel nice?"
He rubbed his eyes and murmured, "Mmmhmm, Keesy liked a lot." His breathing then turned into deep heavy breaths and that made me smirk. He fell asleep. I smirked and kissed his cheek before leaving the room quietly.
On the way out I bumped into someone. "Kakuzu?" He just stared blankly at me, "Where's Kisame?" "Um, he's taking a nap. Why?" He looked off to the side and yawned, "Tired." I cocked an eyebrow and opened the door to his room, "Go take a nap then. You're never too old to do that." He can be too prideful sometimes.
He simply stared into his room but didn't budge. What's with him? I took his hand and tried to lead him inside but the miser wouldn't go. He planted his feet to the floor and grunted, "Kakuzu? What's wrong?"
He lowered his gaze to the floor and muttered, "Scared." …What did he just say! I reached up and held his face, "What are you scared of Kuzu?" If it wasn't for that mask, I could swear he was pouting, "The dark." HELL JUST FROZE OVER!
"I see. I'll be right back." I casually enter the living room and sat on Hidan's lap, "Oh Hidan, darling." He raised his eyebrows and tilted his head, "Yeah?" "What did you do?"
He smirked and averted eye contact, "Nothing." I took his chin and made him face me, "You gave Kakuzu the baby drug didn't you?"
He smirked and gave me a small kiss, "What if I fucking did?" I sighed, "Nothing. I was just checking since he won't go into his room to take a nap since he's now afraid of the dark." "You're fucking shitting me?" "Nope!"
We went back into the hall and found Kakuzu still standing there. Before Hidan could act I whispered menacingly in his ear, "Don't you dare tease him and make it worse." He gave me a fixed look, "Give me some fucking credit, I'm not that cruel." "You were with Kisame."
He sighed, "Alright I fucking see your point." Hidan turned the light on in their room and took his lovers hand, "Come on Kuzu, there's nothing to be fucking afraid of." Kakuzu was hesitant but only took a few steps forward.
I watched in utter amusement as Hidan tried to coax him in, but to no avail. His patience wore off as I knew it would, but did something stupid just when Kakuzu about took a step past the doorframe. "If you don't get your fucking ass in here already, I'm letting the boogey man get you!"
I face palmed. Kakuzu's eyes grew wide and jerked his hand away before dashing to the bathroom and locking himself in. "Way to go Hidan." "Kakuzu, open this fucking door!" No answer.
BAM! BAM! "I mean it old man; get your fucking ass out here right now!" "Hidan!" I covered his mouth, "Get a grip and be quiet! He's not coming out if you talk to him like that you idiot." He snorted, "But…." "No buts, just leave and let me handle this."
He scowled as he left and I tapped on the door. "Kakuzu?" No answer. "It's ok Kuzu, please open the door for mommy." Well, if I have one boy why not two? I was very surprised that he opened the door and came out.
"Daddy's mean." I held his hand, "I know he is, but he's learning to control that temper." He bent over and hugged my neck, "My Kuzu still tired?" He nodded and I gently pushed him back, "Come on, you can take a nap in my room."
I had to turn the light on and stay by his side before he actually went in there. I tucked him into Tobi's bed and lowered my voice as to not wake Kisame, "Now you be good and go to sleep." I went to leave but he pulled me back, "Don't leave."
I sat on the edge of the bed, "Why honey?" "Kuzu don't want to be left alone." He's SO cute and vulnerable! "You won't be alone, Kisame's right over there." "K." I took off his mask/hood, "Want me to leave the door open so it won't be dark."
He smirked. I take that as a yes. "Good night honey." "Kiss." "Hmm?" "Kuzu want kiss goodnight." I smiled and gave him a deep kiss on the lips before he turned over and fell asleep. I tiptoed out the room and turned the light back off but left the door wide open like I said I would.
*I found Hidan sulking on the couch with Deidara and Tobi trying to giving him tips how to handle a toddler; after all, they went through it as I did.
"Look, I just don't have the fucking patience for it all right!" I sat next to him, "Well how do you think it's going to be when it's time for me to bear yours/Jashin's children?" Hidan was indifferent on the matter, "That's why I fucking have you."
I tensed and smacked his arm, "If you think you're going to dump them on me just because you don't want to deal with it you have another thing coming! If that's the way you feel then I'm not having your brats."
"BRATS!" He glared at me and I gladly returned it. "Settle down you two, I'm sure Hidan will take responsibility for his offspring when the time comes un." "Tobi agrees. Hidan don't really care right now because they're not really his kids. This is just pretend."
I glanced over at him and Hidan nodded, "Hmph, that's actually fucking true. Never thought of it like that." He held my hand and put on a cocky smirk, "I'm fucking sorry. Will you change your mind and have my brats."
"Can't you apologize without the curse words for once? I can't tell half the time if you're being serious or not." He scowled and attacked me with a kiss, "How's that baby?" I found that action funny and nodded, "I forgive you."
*Some time later, Kisame and Kakuzu woke up and we ended up having a ball with them. Sasori and Itachi couldn't take seeing them like that so they went over to Zetsu's. Something about they'll lose all respect for them if they kept watching.
Hidan was combing his lover's hair, which was lying on his stomach and couldn't keep still. "Stop squirming!" Hidan straddled his back to hold him down, "Get off daddy!" "Not until I'm finished!" "Kuzu don't like it!" Hidan mumbled under his breath, "That much hasn't changed."
I couldn't stop myself from laughing at them. Kakuzu was kicking his feet and thrashing his hands on the floor like a kid having a tantrum. At least Hidan got the handful and not me; Kisame wasn't bad.
Right now he was combing Deidara's long blonde hair with fascination. "Are you through yet un?" "Almost Deidei." Deidara flinched at his previous nickname and glowered at Tobi. "Don't look at Tobi sempai. Tobi didn't tell him." That gaze turned to me, "What? It's cute."
He rolled his eyes, "Oh well, you're lucky I like having my hair combed or I'd be long gone by now un." "AGHHHH!" Hidan bit back a LOT of curses and glared at Kakuzu. "What happened un?"
"The fucker bit me!" "Why did you do that to daddy Kuzu?" The miser made a face, "Daddy hurt Kuzu." "I did not!" "Did too!" "Did not!" "DID TOO!" "DID NOT!"
Tobi sniggered, "Why does this not surprise Tobi?" "That makes two of us un." "Ditto." Hidan finally shut up and asked, with an attitude of course, "How did I supposedly hurt you?" "Pulled Kuzu's hair!" "There was a knot!" "DON'T CARE IT HURT!"
"I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT REALLY HURTS KUZU!" He turned around and started spanking him hard. I can't believe what I'm seeing; Kakuzu is getting spanked by Hidan! Usually it's reversed if that happens.
"STOP IT DADDY!" "THIS IS FOR GIVING YOUR DADDY LIP AND BEING A BAD BOY!" Apparently this punishment scared Kisame since he buried his face in my lap and wrapped his arms around my waist. I stroked his hair to calm him down, "Hidan that's enough. I think you proved your point."
He stopped mid-slap and took some deep breaths. "Fine." He got off Kakuzu and went into the kitchen staring at his hand. "Keesy, can mommy get up please." "No." "It's all over now." He warily let me go and latched on to Tobi instead. He did the same thing I did to calm him down.
I went over and knelt down to my lover noticing he didn't shed a tear; still the tough miser. "Kuzu hate daddy." I smirked and rubbed his back, "You shouldn't hate him Kuzu. He IS your daddy even though he's not mature like us." He nodded and glanced up at me, "Can Kuzu spend time with mommy now?"
Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Him calling me mommy is beyond words for me to describe. "Sure you can honey." I led him over to the couch and sat down, with him resting his head on my lap. Deidara left and soon came back with the legos I had in my room.
"Sempai?" "Shut up I'm bored un." It wasn't long before I kept hearing a low noise. Deidara heard it too and we scanned the room. "What is that?" It was like a low humming sound. I quickly found out, "Tobi?" Deidara face palmed, "Not the pacifier again un!"
Tobi just grinned innocently as Kisame sucked on his pacifier. Deidara and I couldn't take our eyes off it but my attention was immediately turned away to something more interesting. Without me noticing, Kakuzu had already got a hold of my breast and started sucking on a nipple. Deidara's mouth dropped and when Hidan came in, he did the same. "Wait a fucking minute! If he gets to have a tit I want the other one!"
I shook my head, "Sorry but no, daddy hasn't been a good boy like Kuzu." "That's not fucking funny." "What about me? I've been a good boy un." "Yes you have Deidei, I'll give you the other." Hidan pointed threateningly at the blonde, "If you fucking get out of that chair I will fucking beat your ass with the paddle!"
Deidara grinned nervously and went back to his legos. "Keesy! Tobi flung his head back from gaining his sweet release and Kisame brought his head up with a smile.
"Olivia?" Hidan had this evil grin, "Uh, yeah?" He choked back a chuckle, "I didn't know you were fucking breast feeding already." "YOU LITTLE SHIT!" My yell made Kakuzu jump while Hidan and Deidara laughed.
"Mommy?" "I'm sorry Kuzu, mommy didn't mean to yell." Hidan took that opportunity to haul Kakuzu away from me, "That's enough of that." Kisame ran over to me and scooped me up in a hug, "Keesy got mommy all to himself now!"
"Looks that way un." "Olivee can't even touch the floor." That was true but not surprising considering the height difference. "Keesy, can you put mommy down." "No."
"Well, then can you carry mommy into bathroom so she can give you a bath then." "Ok!" "NO FAIR!" Hidan covered his ears, "Ow, what's not fair Kuzu?" "Why can't Kuzu go too?" Hidan about made a snide remark when I interrupted him, "Hidan, come on. He can come too."
*Bath time was fun, though VERY awkward at the same time. We didn't get any trouble until we dried them off. Kakuzu was obviously jealous that my attention was on Kisame and kept trying to switch places; making Hidan agitated and bickering.
"Hidan, just dry Keesy off and stop griping." That made Kakuzu happy and Hidan was MEAN when it came to dressing them. We just put some normal slacks on and didn't bother with a shirt, it's just he decided to put something in their hair.
I shouldn't of, but I did it too. Kakuzu now had two purple bows above both ears and I put a pink one off to the side for Kisame. Hidan tried so hard not to laugh, "Aren't they so fucking cute?" "Yes they are, too cute if you ask me."
We just brought them back into the living room when the other two howled with laughter, along with us. "What the hell is so funny?" "I don't find anything amusing!" The laughter instantly stopped; the drug wore off.
"Olivia, mind explaining what you did to me?" "Same goes for you Hidan." Kisame glanced over at Kakuzu and his eyes got big, "Kakuzu?" He turned but his reaction was different, he pursed his lips, "Kisame?"
They both somewhat calmly leave and head into the bathroom. "You two are so dead un." "Tobi knows they're going to see the bows." I sarcastically shook Hidan's hand, "Nice knowing you Hidan, it's been great." "Same here, I might not see you for a fucking while."
"HIDANNNNNN!" "OLIVIAAAAAAA!" Hidan and I both ran like hell before a VERY peeved Kakuzu and Kisame came flying into the living room. I ran out the door to Zetsu's and threw myself on his door when I got there, "Zetsu let me in!"
Kisame came out of the apartment and spotted me. "SHIT!" I ran like hell, not having a clue to where I was going but he easily caught up to me. I can't outrun any of them even if I wanted to. He threw me onto his shoulder none too gently and brought me back to the apartment.
We met Sasori on the way back, "You're back to normal I see." Kisame just grunted something I couldn't hear. He followed us into the apartment and saw that Kakuzu caught Hidan. He had him gagged and tied up with his threads with him over his shoulder as well.
"What's the problem you two?" Kakuzu growled, "What's the problem you ask. I'll tell you what the damn problem is! How would you like to wake up and find bows in your hair like a girl!" Kisame nodded, "Who knows what else they fucking did to make fools of us!"
He smacked my behind after his statement and made me gasp. Sasori frowned, "I know exactly how it feels to be made like a fool or have you two forgotten this past week's events?" Kisame narrowed his eyes, "No but let's change the subject. I would like to have a word with you Sasori before I begin to punish her."
Kakuzu grunted, "The same goes for me as well." Sasori sighed, "Very well."
Hidan and I were released but not before being warned, "If you so much as get off this couch Hidan, your punishment will be even worse." "The same goes for you too Olivia." We nodded and clung to each other as they left the room.
*It was ten minutes when Sasori called us into his room, after getting permission from the shark and miser of course. We found him sitting in a chair with his arms crossed, "It's time to discuss my payment for the drug."
"What's there to fucking discuss? I've already fucking agreed to pay money for it." "I did too." Sasori shook his head, "Before I continue go and get my compensation please." We did and handed him the money when he continued, "Now that's settled, there is another fine for you two to pay."
"Eh?" "What the fuck Sasori?" "Let me finish! Another negotiation has been forced upon you two due to these issues." He motioned for us to turn around and there stood Kakuzu and Kisame blocking the doorway.
Sweatdrop. We were speechless and Sasori pointed at both of us, "You're to reimburse Kakuzu and Kisame now." Those two behemoths were grinning evilly from ear to ear and Kakuzu waved a small packet at Hidan.
"No fucking way! Don't you fucking dare old man!" Kakuzu binded him with his threads and cupped his chin, "Is that any way to speak to your soon to be father Hidan?" His eye twitched and was silent; he knew he couldn't get out of this. "No talking back? That's my boy."
He covered his mouth to muffle the curses now that Hidan's over his shock and led him away. "Olivia?" I tensed as Kisame beckoned me over with a finger. I timidly go to him, regretting immensely that I drugged him now, as he firmly gripped the back of my neck.
He guided me to his room before whispering in my ear, "Looks like my little girl needs to be punished." I paled and muttered, "But I…" He pressed a finger to my lips, "I'm afraid you're not getting the drug. I want my girl conscious when her papa disciplines her."
Why do I have a feeling this is going to hurt?
FINI!
Surprised all of you didn't I?
On the votes if was definitely between Kisame and Kakuzu so I decided to put them both! TOO FUNNY!
I hope everyone liked this story as much as I did! On this chapter I couldn't stop laughing myself
