I'M BAAACKKK!
These past two weeks have been a little crazy. I'm sorry for not updating, but I had final exams, so please forgive me. =D
This chapter is related to Chapter 8 of Seven Deadly Sins: Tom's Purpose (Tom's Sloth Chapter)
Reply time!
The Yankee Countess: I thought a little contact was in order after something as traumatic as cleaning her patient's blood off the floor. I love that they need each other for comfort and they can tell each other their deepest and darkest fears. =D THE SYBIL AND TOM SHIP IS THE BEST!
shana-rose: I hope your insides are okay now! XD
gothamgirl28: 5) LOL! Tom always has something up his sleeve. I don't know if I'll write it cause I have something else lined up, but it's definitely a possibility considering that I'm on break now! =X 6) And your welcome!
MelodyOfSong: Go raibh maith agat! XD
Katie Duggan's Niece: I didn't appreciate the fact that Tom was portrayed as angry and bitter in the beginning of series two. We all know that Tom has a capacity to love and we missed some of that in the early episodes of series two.
The treaty they're talking about in this chapter is the Anglo-Irish Treaty of 1921. It created the Irish Free State.
Onto the chapter!
o o o
Kindness
Sybil
He was so tired.
Empty bottles littered the dirty floor.
Every last drop of alcohol had been consumed. It's been two days since the last glass was filled.
He yearned for more, but the thought of it sickened him.
The dust hung thick in the air.
Dishes were piling up in the sink.
The curtains were drawn. He never bothered to open them.
No light ever came in.
Outside of his small flat were thousands of happy people, going about their day and living life.
He hated them all.
He could have been happy once, but his chance for happiness had passed him by years ago.
He stood up from the table, ready to go out and get more alcohol.
It was a heavy burden and he wanted to get rid of it, but it was all he had now.
He was tying his shoes when the sound of three knocks cut through the silence.
"Fucking hell," he muttered as stood up. He strode over to the door, unlocked it, and swung it open.
The last person he expected was on the other side.
"Hello Kieran."
It was Tommy's wife.
It had been more than two years since he last saw her. She looked exactly the same. Strands of her short ebony hair was blowing in the cold December wind from under her hat. Two leather-clad hands were clasped onto each other, clutching a small purse. He expected to see a smile.
There was none.
She was a beautiful woman, but then again, weren't all women who were out of a man's league beautiful? Over the course of two years, he could tell that motherhood had changed her. Any indication that she was once an Earl's daughter was gone. She stood tall and proud, but not because of her background. The woman who stood before him was a strong woman, a nurse, a mother. A woman who had the love of a child and a husband guiding her every move, someone who would do anything to protect the ones she loved.
Sybil Branson was not a woman not to be trifled with.
He stepped aside and silently invited her in. She walked past him and into his flat. If she was disgusted by the filth, she didn't show it. They awkwardly stood facing each other. Her hands never leaving her purse, his now stuffed into the depths of his pockets. Kieran decided to be amicable. He hadn't wronged her. She had no reason to be angry with him, at least not yet.
"Where's Tommy? Not that I was expecting to see him anyway…"
"At the inn with Sybbie."
Sybbie. His god daughter. 'Gorgeous little thing. She'd be two by now…'
"I gather you're going back to Ireland now that the treaty's been passed."
"We are."
An awkward silence passed.
"Would you like to sit down?"
"If you don't mind."
He went over to the table and pulled a chair out. A beer bottle rolled off the seat and landed with a thud on the floor. He kicked it away and Sybil sat down. Kieran sat opposite her.
"I'd offer you some tea, but I don't have any."
"That's fine. I'm not staying long. I just wanted to speak with you."
She brought her hands up to the table and started to pick at the whiskey label.
"I know that your relationship with Tom has always been strained and he won't talk to me about it."
Kieran leaned back on his chair. He thought of the night they told him Da died. His world fell apart. Their father was his hero. The greatest man in the world, dead from an accident at the docks. The family would have to rely on him. Kieran Branson, breadwinner. He was destined to be tied down in Ireland, to put his life on hold until the youngest was old enough to fend for himself. The youngest hadn't even been born yet.
For an 18 year old whose while life was ahead of him, it was a death sentence.
Instead of voicing his frustrations, he took them out on Tom. He didn't deserve it, but he was always nearby.
"I've done terrible things. I don't blame him for hating me. Him and the rest of my family."
"Isn't there room for forgiveness?"
'Forgiveness is a luxury I can never have.'
Tom burst through the door with Niall close behind.
"What the fuck Kieran?"
Kieran was sitting on the couch, drunk out of his mind, a common sight under the Branson roof.
"Ohhh! Heallo Tommay! What brrings you heeer?"
Tom grabbed his brother by the lapels on his jacket and punched him square in the mouth. He crumpled to the floor in agony.
Kieran spit blood out of his mouth. The metallic taste sobered him up somewhat.
"Why the fuck would you do that to Niall."
He knew exactly what he had done. He wasn't sorry.
He sneered. "It was a joke Tommy."
Tom looked at him with hard eyes. "That? A fucking joke Kieran?"
Kieran stood up, lip split from the punch.
"Yes, a joke. Fucking Christ, lighten up."
Tom's fist connected with Kieran's mouth again.
"This is just like you. You treat everyone like shit then wonder why they're not worshipping the ground you walk on. When you pull shit like this, it's not hard to figure out. You spent years beating me, then you take it out on Niall! What the fuck is wrong with you?"
Kieran lunged at Tom and pushed him into the youngest Branson. Niall caught him and prevented Tom from falling over. The eldest Branson hovered over Tom and Niall, ready for a fight.
"You don't understand Tommy. You can never understand how hard it was for me. I had to take care of this family. Everything fell onto my shoulders when Da died. What about me? I sacrificed my life for this family! I had plans Tommy! I was supposed to get married, travel around Ireland, start a family, have a life. But no! I had to stay here and take care of you lot! I was only 18 and there was another one on the way. What the fuck was I supposed to do? I had no fucking choice!"
Tom shoved Kieran into the wall. His forearm at Kieran's neck. Tom pressed hard and his face was red with anger.
"Don't blame Da! Fuck off Kieran. If you want to go, then GO!"
The cloud of memory rose and left Kieran wishing for a shot of whiskey.
Being sober meant you could remember. He didn't want that. The memories were too painful.
He left Ireland for a new life, all it wasn't all that it was cracked up to be. Exiled from his family, he drank far too much and pushed away any love that came his way. He regretted his life deeply and hated the where it was going, but there was nothing he could do now. Alcohol was his medicine, but now he was getting sick of it. It blocked the memories, but he had been numb for so long.
Kieran was alone and he had no one to blame but himself.
Having Tommy's wife here only fueled his guilt and self-loathing. He hung his head low and steeled himself for the flurry of punches and the string of swears he deserved from the woman sitting across from him.
"I used to beat Tommy."
Sybil's eyes went wide at her brother-in-law's confession. Tears welled up in her eyes. "Kieran…"
He could feel her stare. He didn't look up. If he did, he feared he would burst into flames. "I wasn't good to Tommy or Niall. I'm a terrible brother and I abandoned my family."
"Tom has a big heart. He can forgive…"
"He's got all the right in the world not to forgive me."
Sybil's gaze shifted down to her hands.
"I hit Tom once. In a stupid moment of rage. He had no right to forgive me, but he did."
Their eyes finally met. A glimmer of clarity started to shine through.
"He may not show it, but he wishes that you were in Sybbie's life."
He chuckled. What a lie.
"I'm grateful that you decided to make me Sybbie's god father, but I haven't done anything for her. I don't deserve her. Niall is a better man than I am. He can take care of her."
"Niall is young and has lots of love to give. You have love to give too. She needs both her uncles."
Kieran let her words sink in.
Love. Was he capable of that anymore or did he drink that away? Could he give that to his god daughter and niece? Would it be enough?
Sybbie deserved a life without her drunk uncle. He would end up being a disappointment to her.
He loved his niece with all his heart. She was the most precious creature to ever walk the Earth. He could turn his life around for her if he wanted. Kieran just needed help.
"I'm a drunk."
"You're sober now."
She was right. He had to kick the bottles to the curb sometime or another. Why not start now?
There was only one obstacle left. It was the biggest hurdle he had to face.
"Tom hates me."
The admission burned. He knew Tom hated him, but saying it out loud in front of Tom's wife hurt him. The past 19 years could be forgiven but not forgotten.
"You're not the same man I met at Downton. You've changed. Tom will see that."
"Have I? Will he?"
"Kieran," she reached over and put her hand on his, "If there's one thing that the Bransons all have in common, it's that you all have good hearts. Sometimes they just get lost."
Kieran stayed silent and stayed seated as she sighed and rose to leave.
"We're only here for tonight. We're staying in a small inn near St. Peter's church if you want to join us for dinner tonight."
She left without a word.
He stewed in the silence. Kieran stood up from the table, went to the window, and opened the curtains.
The light streamed in.
. . .
There was a knock at the door.
"Could you get that love? Sybbie's getting to be a handful."
Sybbie squirmed in her mother's arms and wailed for her father. She escaped her mother's embrace and waddled to her father who picked her up and spun her around. She squealed in delight. He put her on his shoulders and her tiny hands tugged on his hair. Her hands snaked around Tom's head and covered his eyes. She roared in laughter.
"Da! Da can't see!"
Sybil's voice boomed from the bedroom. "Sybbie! Don't cover your Da's eyes!"
Sybbie slumped over Tom's head and hugged his head. She kissed the mop of hair on the top his head and laid her cheek on her kiss.
"Sorry Da."
Tom moved her from his shoulders to his hip and she wrapped her small arms around his neck.
"It's alright love." He kissed the tip of her nose and lowered his voice so Sybil wouldn't be able to hear him. "We can play more after dinner."
She giggled and nuzzled her head in his shoulder. "You're the best Da in the world!"
Tom laughed and opened the door.
His brother was standing across the threshold, holding his hat in his hands and looking sober…for once.
"Hello Tommy. It's been a long time."
