This chapter is going to be all about Amu and Ikuto. Enjoy!
I don't own Shugo Chara.
Three and a half months have passed since Saaya learned my secret. If it wasn't for Ikuto I'd have spent those months waiting in fear for the other shoe to drop. Nothing has happened with Saaya since that day. Okay, I have to deal with her constant glares and her insults under her breath, but that's not that bad. I've learned that Ikuto had a protective personality. He's protective of me, despite the fact that I've told him multiple times I don't need a hero. Ikuto doesn't need to save me. However he refuses to believe me.
"Good morning." I jumped. His laughter came from behind me. "You scare too easily." I turned with the intention to glare at him, but my smile took over as soon as I saw him standing there with breakfast. I took my drink happily.
"Thanks. Next time don't scare me." I said sternly and draped my bag over my shoulder. We still had half an hour until class. We made our way to the commons area, where most students lingered before school. Several couples snuck off to their own hiding places to spend time together before class began. "There's Rima." I pointed to her. Two girls were standing by her. I recognized them as Ran and Miki. While I've never talked to them, I knew Rima was close with the two of them.
"Hey," Miki said, clutching a sketch book to her chest. "Amu, right?" I nodded. Miki has blue hair, and from what I can guess, she's very artistic.
"Please tell me you brought me something to drink too." Rima joked, only to have a drink handed to her. "I was just joking, but thank you so much." She grinned and slid her straw through the opening. "They have something to tell you." Rima said to me grimly.
"Saaya is saying some things about you. We thought you deserved to know." My stomach dropped in dread. "We overheard her in the bathroom and came to find you. Saaya said she was going to make sure something happens between you and Ikuto. She's pretty pissed that you're together."
"Oh, Jesus. Will she ever believe me when I say we aren't together?" I grumbled. Ran and Miki exchanged a look of confusion. "We aren't together." I repeated. "See?" I swatted Ikuto's arm angrily. "I told you to stop doing things a boyfriend would do because I don't want people to think I'd date you!" The three girls watching us laughed.
"Are they always like this?" Ran asked while laughing.
"Yep." Rima quipped. "They're always like this. I'm just waiting for them to admit they like each other and get it over with." I whipped around to glare playfully at her. "Let's face it. It's going to happen eventually." I shook my head, but I'm about ninety percent sure I saw Ikuto nod out of the corner of my eye. I blushed fiercely and kicked him in the lower leg.
"Don't," I cautioned him.
"To answer your question, no." Ran told me. "She's never going to believe you. Anyways, I heard something about a scar." Luck was on my side today because Ikuto was behind me when my eyes grew wide.
"I don't know what she's talking about." Had you looked closely, my body language would say otherwise.
"Even if you don't both of you should watch out. She's gotten telling lies down to an art." Miki warned. "I'd hate to see you get hurt."
"It's not new to me. We go back to elementary school when I put glue in her hair." Miki laughed.
"I like you." She told me, smiling. "Maybe you should do that again sometime." I just shook my head.
"That's probably not a good idea." I answered, sitting my drink down and unwrapping my sandwich. "I'd prefer to just avoid her, but since she's obsessed with Ikuto that won't be happening."
"I'm sure it will turn out okay." Ran said optimistically.
"Or it will turn out where you annihilate her in a fight, which I'd rather see." Ran just gave her a look.
"Excuse her. She's just waiting for the day someone gives her a taste of her own medicine." Rima said. "We've disliked her for a long time." She explained. "But I guess you've got us beat on that one." I shrugged.
"It's not a big deal." Oh, but it was. I knew it, Ikuto knew it. "She hasn't caused me problems the last few months." I was thinking out loud. "I wonder why she waited until now though to mess with us." More and more lately I've been referring to Ikuto and myself as us. "I forgot my notebook in my locker. I'll be right back." Ikuto nodded to me and watched me as I flitted across the tile flooring.
The hallway my locker is in is right next to my first class. The walls are lined with lockers.
"Shit," The word had just escaped my mouth when I felt fingers burrow into my hair. "What the hell." I forced my way around to see my attacker. Tadase's face was inches from mine. "What are you doing?" I screamed and started shoving at him. Then his hands slammed against either side of my body on the locker. The cold metal reached my back.
"Ikuto isn't here to save you this time." My breath caught in my throat as panic clawed its way through my veins. It's like a bucket of cold water had been dumped over my head. It wouldn't have been hard to slip under his arms and run away, but my body wouldn't move. It's as if my feet had been nailed into the floor. My words had become low mumblings that weren't coherent. "Listen!" He slammed his palms against either side of my head again. Tears welled over and I cursed myself for being weak all over again. I'd learned nothing from last time, had I? I was still as weak as ever. "Are you going to go cry to your Mom? No you can't, can you?"
My once normal breathing turned into hyperventilating. Tadase didn't notice. Of course he wouldn't and even if he had, he wouldn't have understood the gravity of what was about to happen.
"Are you going to go cry to Ikuto?" I was barely aware of his hand making impact with my cheek. I will never understand how a man can hit a woman. "No, you're not because you're going to leave him alone." It all made sense. Saaya did this.
"You're going to regret this." My words were pure venom as I ducked under his arms. The feeling in my legs had finally come back. I'd had the full intention of running out the front door, and going home. Instead, my legs carried me to Ikuto. "Ikuto!"
"Amu?" My body fell haphazardly into him. "God, Amu?" My head was spinning and my legs were wobbly. He held onto me. Rima stood over me protectively. "She's hyperventilating." He said lowly.
"Amu, what happened? Your lip is cracked. It's bleeding." Rima said. Her voice seemed far away because I was in my own mind. There are two things that I'm aware of: being in Ikuto's arms is nice, and I'm having a panic attack in his arms. "What happened?"
"Tadase." I whispered. The rage that came across Ikuto's face was all consuming.
"I'll kill him." Of course he didn't mean he'd kill him, but he might come pretty close.
"Just take her home. She looks like she's going to pass out." Rima slid my bag off of my shoulder. "I'll help you get her stuff to your car." Miki and Ran still stood by us, but they moved as if to create a wall between me and the rest of the world. I felt protected. There are some pretty amazing people here. Maybe I've just never found them before.
My panic hadn't subsided while I distracted myself with my thoughts. A squeak came out of my body when Ikuto put his hands under my knees and back. The way he picked me was effortless. In my attempt to joke around, I mumbled. "I bet you do this all the time."
His response made my heart beat faster and my toes curl. "Only for people I really care about." His arms are strong. I never thought about how strong he is because he's lanky. Not lanky in a bad way, I just thought I'd be too heavy to be carried with ease. I was definitely wrong.
"Saaya's right there!" I hissed, my words laced with panic and fear. I hate the way I can't control my emotions. It makes you feel weak. His only response was to cradle me closer, to make her mad and to make me feel safe.
I'm starting to feel like the only time I really feel safe is with him. It's not supposed to be that way. I can deny my feelings all I want, but I'm not stupid. Even if I continually tell him I don't need saving, he always swoops in anyways. Even if I lie, saying I hate that, I secretly enjoy having someone who cares.
But my walls just aren't coming down.
Five minutes later I found myself in his car with the heat starting to warm up the car. He silently drove off the parking lot. "Do you want to pick up Ami?" Ikuto asked me. His anger was visible.
"No, I don't want her to see me like this." He nodded and began the way to my house. "I'm so sorry." I just broke down right there in his passenger seat. It's so embarrassing for me. Ikuto's look was one of confusion. "I'm sorry you have to deal with my shit. Look I know you're only here because you blame yourself. You can leave. You can drop me off here and I'll walk." Instantly he pulled over to the side of the road. My worst fear was realized. He didn't want to be friend for real.
"What the hell are you talking about?" I flinched at his words, believing the hostility behind them was for me.
"Please don't get mad at me. It's just, I understand that you're doing this because you feel responsible and," He cut me off so abruptly my head spun.
"Amu, I'm not here because I feel guilty." He leaned across the center console to look at me. "But I think this conversation would be better to have inside where it's warm." He was right. His car wasn't doing against the cold November weather. I nodded.
Ikuto carried me inside my house without even asking me if he could. My thoughts were a mix of God, please don't drop me because of the ice, and what's wrong with me?
He took one glance at the living room and saw the piano. Ikuto shook his head no. "That will only upset you more."
So here we are in my bedroom, with both of sitting on the bed. My face is red and blotchy. My makeup bag looks really good right now. I waited awkwardly for him to resume out conversation because I didn't know how.
"When you first came back, yeah I wanted to help you because I blamed myself. Then I got to know you and things just changed. I'm here now because I care and you're my best friend. I'm happier around you than I ever was being friends with Saaya and Tadase. You don't need to tell me sorry because none of this is your fault."
"I just had a panic attack in front of you, in your arms." I just couldn't comprehend how I hadn't scared him off. "Why are you still here?"
He sighed in exasperation. "I'm here because I care about you. Is it that hard to believe?"
"Yeah it kind of is!" He threw his hands in the air at my response.
"Listen to me. It doesn't bother me that you have panic attacks. It bothers me that you can't talk to me about these things because you don't trust me." My heart felt extremely heavy.
I opened my mouth a few times, intending to spill everything right then while we sat on my bed. He waited patiently, with emotions flashing across his face that I can't understand. I will never really understand people. No words came out. I wanted to tell him. Really. But I just couldn't. "I can't." I finally said, noticing how anger came across his face even if only for a brief second. "I will, but not now."
Ikuto shrugged this time. It killed me inside. I wanted to hear that it was okay, and that he'd wait. No one's going to wait forever though.
"Maybe you should go." I swallowed the lump in my throat finally and tears threatened to spill. If he stayed, he'd see how I reacted. I knew that it would hurt him, but I didn't want him to see me cry over him. Here I've put up the façade that I'm stronger than I am, but the layers are peeling away little by little.
"You're running away." He said in this dead tone that just made my insides twist. "We've been friends for almost four months now and you're running away now."
"I'm about to cry and I don't want you to see it."
"I don't care if you're going to cry. No, I do care, but I don't care if you cry in front of me. It doesn't change anything." I was at a loss for words. "If you don't want to tell me whatever it is you don't want to tell me, then so be it. All of that aside, I care about you and I care when someone hits you!" His voice raised. "I'm giving a fair warning now. If you really want me to leave I will. If I leave I'm going back to school and I'm going to beat the shit out of Tadase." I tried to talk. "You don't need saving? I don't care. It's not about saving you. It's about being your friend and friends don't let friends get hit."
He'd leaned in as if staring at me would make me get the point he was making.
"Okay." It's all I could manage then. "I'm sorry." It's the lamest thing I'll ever say. The next thing that happened is on me. Since our friendship began Ikuto learned that I don't like to be touched. I blame it on the claustrophobia, but I also don't like people touching me. Ikuto makes a lot of things go out the window though.
"Oh," He breathed out as I came forward, clumsily might I add, and hugged him. "That's not what I expected." I laughed while still crying as he hugged me back. "What's this for? Not that I don't like it." He tacked the end on swiftly so I wouldn't let go.
"Thank you. I'm glad that I have you and Rima." I didn't have to say anything else. "Is there anything I can say to stop you from beating up Tadase?"
"Nope."
I figured that would be the answer.
I've been writing so much! I hope you're really enjoying the story.
-Kelsey.
