A/N: Okay, since I know I've been neglecting this story lately, I thought I would give my beautiful, supa gorgeous readers a bonus chapter. Now, bonus you say? What I mean is that this was not originally in the plot line, and I was going to let Kagome explain this from Bella POV, but I rethought it and I think this scene is special enough where it deserves its own chapter. Also, I know that many people, Inuyasha and Twilight fan, are probably like "wtf?" over the past Inuyasha/Kagome confrontation in Chapter six, so I am going to give some insight on their relationship dynamics.
SOOOO… this is the scene where Kagome leaves Inuyasha, from Kagome POV. Enjoy!
This chapter's song is "You're Not Sorry" by Taylor Swift. It is a sorta wistful love song that explains Inuyasha/Kagome pairing, but this chapter makes the song really sad! So listen to it while reading!
0.o.0
*BONUS* Chapter 7: I Wish Our Love Could Move Mountains
Two years ago…
Empty. That's how I feel right now.
I should be happy, over joyous. But I'm not.
Just empty. And I have the worst headache right now.
0.o.0
We defeated Naraku about a week ago. I'm not exactly sure, I lost track of the days ever since. With the help of Sesshomaru, Inuyasha's brother, and Kouga's wolf tribe, we were able to defeat Naraku for the last time. The final blow was a combination of Inuyasha's wind scar, my sacred arrow, Kikyo's sacred arrow, and a blow from Sesshomaru's sword. Miroku and Sango had helped out with defeating Naraku's incarnations and fending Naraku off, watching our backs as we aimed for certain vital spots on Naraku. We also had the strength of numbers as Kouga brought his wolf tribe of about 400 demons.
But, Naraku had almost the entire jewel, giving him a huge advantage over us.
I remember after the battle, when Inuyasha ran up and hugged me, not caring of any onlookers, or of the gore spattered on his red robe. I remember when I looked into his eyes, they did not hold the usual roughness and insensitivity that they usually held. They were wide and bright, like he was a little kid, with all pretenses gone. He held me in his arms, and spun me around, laughing.
"Kagome, we won! We finally won! We don't have to fight anymore!" Inuyasha hollered in a giddy voice. I giggled, shrieking with joy as he continued to spin us around the battle field.
I looked around the battle field, and saw that Sango and Miroku were huddled by themselves, Miroku flexing his left hand, which did not bear the wind tunnel that so long ago Naraku cursed upon his family. Now Miroku could go on and have a family, without the fear of bearing upon his children the same curse, or leaving poor Sango a widow.
Shippo was all over the place, bouncing from person to person, speaking of how happy he was that Naraku was gone. And, he kept saying, "Yeah, Naraku can burn in hell!" In any other case, I would have to reprimand him for his language, but I found that I didn't want to: it was true.
Inuyasha set us down on our feet, and I looked up into his face. His features were suddenly serious, his eyes smoldering. He raised a hand hesitantly towards my face, and cupped it around my cheek. I gasped as I felt lightning emit from his rough finger tips. Just as he was bending his face towards mine with excruciating slowness, his eyes on my lips, a voice rang out from behind us.
"Inuyasha, may I have a word with you?" it asked. We spun around, and Inuyasha immediately let go of me.
It was Kikyo, a smug expression on her face. How…usual.
Inuyasha looked at me hesitantly, and titled my chin up towards his face.
"I'll be back," he reassured, and let go, following after Kikyo into the woods.
I looked towards where they entered the woods, and couldn't help but let a tear flow down my cheek. He was about to kiss me! After two years of loving him and staying by his side, the perfect opportunity dawned on him to kiss me, and we were interrupted. I didn't know what I was feeling: disappointment, frustration, sadness. But, the most predominant was anger: anger at Kikyo for ruining the perfect moment, anger at Inuyasha for actually going with Kikyo.
"Kagome!" I heard Sango's voice from behind me ring. I turn around me to see Sango bound into my arms, hugging me like there was no tomorrow. I hugged her back, forgetting my troubles and concentrating on the present: the need to help those injured in battle, bury any casualties, purify the jewel, make a wish. Anything else could be thought about later…
Inuyasha could be thought of later.
0.o.0
Kaede's hut basically became the hospital for those in the battle. The majority of Kouga's pack had gone back up north, but the rest were either too injured to be traveling, or just hanging around to find out about celebration plans the villagers were concocting. Kaede, Sango, and I had taken over the "hospital" that was the hut, wrapping up wounds, providing food for the warriors that were still around, and such. Miroku, Shippo, and other warriors were in charge of burying the dead, which thank god, was not as many as it could've been.
Inuyasha did not show up from his rendezvous with Kikyo until a day and a half later. He came back to the village, with grime and dirt from the battle still caked unto his skin. I ran out to meet him when I saw him from the hut.
"Inuyasha! It's so good to see you home!" I welcomed, about to reach up for a hug (dirty Inuyasha or not), but Inuyasha blocked me.
"Why wouldn't I be home?" he snapped, walking past me. I blinked, not sure how to respond to this. Was this the same Inuyasha who had twirled me around the battle field? Is this the same Inuyasha who wanted to kiss me? At the thought, I teared up, but I bit my lip, willing myself not to cry.
But, with Inuyasha's super-hyped senses, he was able to smell the salty liquid in my eyes, no matter how miniscule it was. He turned around, his expression softer. He walked towards me, and hesitantly hugged me, as if he was required to.
"I'm sorry I snapped at you Kagome. I'm just stressed right now…" he trailed off, looking out into the distance. I gave him one last squeeze before patting his back and withdrawing from the embrace. I didn't want to prod him for details, knowing there was the strong possibility I would probably not get an answer.
"The villagers are having a festival in celebration of Naraku's death, and then after that, we're going to make a wish on the jewel!" I piped, hoping that I sounded some bit cheery. Inuyasha smiled.
"That should be fun. So when are the lecherous monk and Sango going to get hitched?" he asked gruffly, chuckling to himself at the prospect of the two being married after so long. I laughed.
"Well, Miroku has already begun making a hut for them, and at the pace that he's going, it should be no time at all," I mused, laughing at Miroku's eagerness.
Inuyasha snorted, "The stupid letch probably just wants to get into her pants as fast as he can."
I laughed awkwardly, and looked away. Talking about our friends' future made me wonder about mine. Was I going to stay here with Inuyasha? That was a no brainer, of course I would stay. The question is whether he would take me, or take Kikyo.
As we started walking to the village together, I looked at him slyly from the corner of my eyes, and when he sensed I was looking, he looked down at me and smiled. Testing out my new found confidence, I slid an arm around his waist. In return, he put his arm around my shoulders, squeezing me to his body.
I hope we could stay like this forever: in limbo.
0.o.0
"Kagome, how about this fabric? It would look perfect on you," Sango explained. Spacing out again, I shook my head, bringing myself back to reality.
"I'm sorry, what did you say Sango?" I asked drowsily, paying closer attention to my surroundings now. We were in the local dress-shop, and the owners offered graciously to make us custom kimonos for the village festival, being "heroes" and all.
"I said that the green fabric would look good on you…are you okay? Wasn't kimono shopping your idea from the beginning?" Sango inquired teasingly. I laughed.
"Oh yeah! I'm just nervous about the next few days," I explained leaving it there.
"Don't worry so much. I'm sure everything with the jewel will turn out okay," Sango reassured, turning back to the fabric, muttering about which one would go with her complexion.
I haven't even thought about the jewel until Sango brought it up. In the past couple of days, Inuyasha has popped up into my mind constantly. He has been seeing Kikyo all week, and it was like a repeat of when he went to see Kikyo the day after the battle, but all week: he would snap at me in some mundane way, and then he would feel bad about it and make it up to me someone. All this week we had rarely squabbled.
I smelled a rat. Of course, I didn't tell anyone. I didn't tell anyone of my concerns of Inuyasha either, because I felt totally selfish. What sort of person would linger on their future so much, when the future of something much more important was on the line, like the sacred jewel?
"Is there anything I can do for you ladies?" the shop keeper asked.
"Yes, could you make two summer kimonos out of these?" Sango asked politely, pointing out the different fabrics and how she wanted them to be put together. The shopkeeper nodded, and grabbed her sewing kit, telling us to come back later in the day before dinner.
When we returned, the seamstress had developed two crude kimonos, but before she could continue alterations and complete them, she needed to fit us into them. As I slid into mine, I noticed the material that Sango had picked out for me. The top fabric was a dark green with flowers and birds etched onto silk. A beautiful red sash kept my kimono closed, and on the inside, the fabric was a light blue with cherry blossoms. I gasped.
"Sango-chan, this fabric is absolutely gorgeous!" I cooed. Sango smirked.
"I told you so! You should let me be your personal shopper from now on," Sango ranted, prideful in her correct choice of fabric.
As I stood in front of the mirror the seamstress provided, I noticed how the green brought out my tan skin, and the blue lining brought out my bluish-gray eyes.
'Maybe when Inuyasha sees me in this, he'll forget all about Kikyo, and we'll be able to live happily ever after…' but I stopped any other thoughts such as this from forming. The whole notion was my strongest hope, but realistically, it was also the most unrealistic outcome.
0.o.0
'Finally, the day of the festival has arrived!' I thought to myself as I stretched on my futon in Kaede's hut. The sun was over the horizon, and based on my educated guess, it must have been around nine o'clock. I woke up Sango, picked up my toiletries and a fresh change of clothes, and we walked over to the hot springs together, so we could get clean for tonight.
I peeled off my clothes quickly, and hopped into the water, the warmth bringing me some reprieve after being in the cool summer morning air. After shampooing and conditioning my hair, I combed it. Shaving everything I think needed to be shaved, I hopped out of the water, and dried myself off with a towel.
I put on a clean priestess robe that Kaede had lent me, and putting on modern flip flops (wooden sandals still haven't quite met my fancy yet), I headed out to a meadow I had discovered a while ago close to the Sacred Tree.
I lay down on the fine soft grass, and toyed with some of the wild flowers that bloomed around me. I looked up towards the sky, which was a brilliant blue, dotted with wisps of white. I sighed, knowing I would never be in such a place as this meadow in the modern era. They sky was never this crisp, the grass never this green. And the noise, being in Tokyo, was horrendous. Back home, there was always something to do, some goal that had to be met, which always had to be done in the fastest way possible. But here, everyone took their time, for there was no hurry. Everyone believed that what needed to get done would be done in due time.
I fiddled with a bright red flower, toying with its petals. Sometimes, I think I was born in the wrong era. As soon as I found my bearings in this era, I have loved every moment. It seems that the pieces deep inside me suddenly connected, and I finally felt whole, like I was actually home.
Of course, this could be due to a certain stubborn half demon.
I sighed again, dropping the flower at my side, and reached for my neck, where the precarious pink jewel hung. I moved it up towards the light, where it glistened, finally whole. The pink of the orb swirled around, and as I pushed a slight amount of purifying energy through the jewel, the swirls moved furiously, and the sacred jewel emitted a white glow. Done toying with it, I stopped emitting purifying energy, and released it. Throughout the past two years, I have learned to control my spiritual powers with such precision it could be a match for even Kikyo's skill.
Once the jewel hung motionless around my neck, I looked back up towards the sky, perching my arms behind my head.
What will happen to me once the jewel is complete? Naraku's words during the battle seeped into my consciousness once again, mustering a once forgotten fear.
"What will you do in this era once the jewel is done, dear Kagome? You will have no purpose in this world: not in this world, or that world beyond the well. I know you need this jewel just as much as I need it…"
I shivered, his words striking a chord within all my irrational fears. Was I really just born into this world just to piece back together the jewel? Once the jewel was gone from this world, was I destined to be once again to fate's cruel hands?
As I rolled over on my side to reach for another flower to study, I noticed someone perched on the branches of the Sacred Tree, and I gasped, poising my body in the fight or flight position.
"Inuyasha, what are you doing here?" I asked, my hand flying over my over-exerted heart. Inuyasha just scowled, scratching behind his head nervously.
"N-nothing, I was just here to make sure you didn't lose the jewel, 'cause I knew you would…" Inuyasha muttered, winding his arms through his sleeves. I brush off his sorry excuse, and patted the grass next to me.
"Sit down with me, Inuyasha," I requested, mustering up some cheerfulness, a deep contrast to my brooding thoughts.
Within two seconds, he was sitting next to me, cross-legged and poised in a typical Inuyasha-esque pose.
"Keh, what do you want to do?" Inuyasha asked, but without the usual hostility, warmth seeping into his voice. I lay down, putting my hand on his shoulder and dragging him down to lay next to me.
"What are we doing Kagome?" he asked a bit impatiently, like a little kid. I smiled.
"We're looking at this beautiful summer sky," I explained, humming to myself an old folk tune as I grabbed another flower and counted the petals. Inuyasha shrugged.
"What's so special about it? It looks like any other dumb ol' sky…" Inuyasha dismissed, but stayed close to me.
"Don't you see it? Doesn't the sky look so much bluer, and the clouds more majestic? Hm, how about we play a game? You have to say whatever you think a cloud looks like. Like that one, I think it looks like… a swan!" I shouted, pointing up to a particularly fluffy cloud. I subtly rested my forehead on his shoulder, and I could hear him take a large gulp.
"B-but this game is dumb!" Inuyasha protested, but made no motion to move my head.
"Please Inuyasha? I promise it will be fun!" I pouted, sticking my bottom lip out slightly. Inuyasha shifted uncomfortably.
"Feh, fine, only if ya stop whining about it!" Inuyasha conceded huffily, resting his cheek on my hair.
"Ummm…that one looks like Shippo, right after you push him into a river. See? How it's all puffy and big?" he pointed out, in a nonchalant tone. I sighed.
"Can't you think of anything better Inuyasha?!?" I asked, a bit flabbergasted at his thought process.
We came up with a few more, and took turns at laughing at each other for the other's description. The one I laughed most at was when Inuyasha claimed that one of the clouds looked like a hand mark that Sango usually put on Miroku's face when he touched her butt.
"You can't be serious!" I trilled, laughing at the similarities of the cloud and his description
"Oi, doesn't it look like that? Nah, look, it's like a perfect replica!" he argued, pointing at the offending cloud profusely. I propped myself up on my elbow, resting my chin on his chest so I could look at his face.
"I think you're crazy," I teased, resting a hand right on his chest. Inuyasha's eyes widened, and he tensed underneath my body, but then he relaxed, and smiled. Wondering why he did that, I looked at our situation and saw that in fact I had put ourselves in a rather compromising position if anyone were to walk in on us.
All of a sudden, I felt Inuyasha's arm around my waist, and instead of pushing me away, he pulled me tighter to his body.
"I'm not crazy…"he defended, at the same time brushing a lock of hair behind my ear. He then took a flower that I had set aside on the ground and put it in my hair delicately, letting his hand linger. I stared back, entranced with his eyes. Then, with one sudden movement, I moved my whole body over him, and he put both of his hands on my hips. I then resumed our previous activity, resting my chin on his chest, looking back into his eyes, which probed my eyes, like he liked what he was looking at.
God, I was so in love with this boy-well, man in reality. I remember Inuyasha told me that he was over 200 years old, including the time that he was pinned to the tree. And he was only 17! He told me that demons did not age much, and even though his brother Sesshomaru looked like he was in his early 20s, he was over a millennium old. I wonder if demons were considered "immortal". Would that make them untouchable? Many cultures often labeled a compassionate relationship between mortals and immortals as taboo: impossible, unattainable, and even deadly. Were Inuyasha and I doomed from the beginning?
I continued to look into his eyes, hoping to convey all my woes without having to voice them and embarrass myself. I studied the amber hue of his eyes, which were warm, even melting. I remember when we first journeyed together, whenever I snuck a peek up into his eyes, they were always frozen, glassy, unmoving. Like he couldn't let anyone in, or that he couldn't even trust me, a mere human girl. But, over time, his eyes started grow life back into them. Maybe not as a bystander, but from any of his companions, you could surely note the difference.
I then continued to study the rest of his face: his incredibly long eyelashes, the white bangs falling into his eyes, the slight freckles on the bridge of his nose, his pink lips. Once I met his gaze again, he smiled a rare toothy smile that I've only seen once. And that was when he talking about Kikyo.
I smiled back, sadly. If only Naraku had not pin Kikyo and Inuyasha against each other fifty years ago. Inuyasha would never have been pinned to the tree, and Kikyo would still be alive, not walking around in a clay body, only fueled on the souls of dead woman and her own anger against Inuyasha. They would have children. Inuyasha would have made a wish on the jewel, a wish to be human, and he and Kikyo would be grandparents, wrinkly and living in the same hut, together until the day they died…
Inuyasha looked at my glistening eyes and sorrowful expression, and immediately frowned. But, to avoid questions, I just smile back, expertly removing any traces of sorrow from my face. I run my hand up his chest to the rosary around his neck and rest my head back down on his chest. After a few moments, I feel fingers rake through my hair comfortingly and I close my eyes, reveling in the sensation.
But then, I heard the sound of rustling, and someone tumbled from the forest into the clearing.
"Inuyasha? Inu-? Oh, whoa, sorry!" I heard in front of us from no other than Miroku, who was currently shielding his eyes.
"Ummmm, Inuyasha, some of the men need help setting up, and Kagome, Sango told me to tell you to go home so you guys can get ready. That's about it…I'll be leaving about now," Miroku announced awkwardly, and turned around, brusquely walking back to the village. He forgot the minor detail that he was still covering his eyes, and ran smack into a tree. This being too much for me to handle, I roll off Inuyasha's body, my body being consumed with laughter.
"Oi monk, it's not what it looks like! We were just talking!" Inuyasha exclaimed, now up on his feet, waving his hands wildly.
"Sure, well I best be on my way now, you too can resume with your 'talking'," Miroku hurriedly amended, waving off Inuyasha's accusations.
"No, it is NOT what it looks like…" Inuyasha trailed off, following hot on Miroku's heels as Miroku fled down the hill.
I resumed my original position in my meadow and looked up at the clouds, not thinking about anything in particular. For some reason, I was calm. The phrase of "the calm before the storm" popped into my mind, but I quickly forgot about it.
'Oh shoot! Sango is waiting for me!' I suddenly recalled, and sprung up on my feet, speeding towards the village.
Hey, at least life is never boring!
0.o.0
"Hold still Kagome-chan!" Sango exclaimed, tugging my hair down my back with unnecessary force, leaving my scalp tender.
"Sorry Sango. I'm just nervous, is all," I reply distractedly, grabbing the hand mirror to help me apply rogue on my lips. Looking too red and audacious for my semi-pale face, I wipe it off with the back on my hand and pull out a tube of modern pink lip gloss I had brought over and apply it to my lips. I see in my reflection Sango take out the two ribbons, select sections of my hair, and start making bows. Finally, after fiddling with the hem of my kimono anxiously, I feel Sango's hands leave my hair and I sigh in relief.
"Done," Sango announces proudly, and then stands up in her kimono, pulling me up with her. She then takes the mirror out of my hand, and holds it a decent distance away. Sango has her hair in a bun at the nape of her neck elegantly, and I have my hair down, cascading over my shoulders and down my back expertly. We both have minimal make up on and Sango wears a pale pink and purple kimono while I have on my green and red kimono. I shift uncomfortably, for unfortunately, I could not forgo the wooden sandals and now had them on my feet, along with an itchy pair of socks.
Holding Sango's hand, I walk out of the hut and head for the village square, where the banquet was being held.
Almost all the villagers were there already there and sitting down at a long table. A table off to the side contained a delectable of food, including pig, chicken, fish, rice, fruits, and sweets such as candied oranges. I smack my lips, my body craving the luxury of fatty foods after a diet of white rice and bland fish.
I grab a plate and a pair of chopsticks and start loading food unto my plate. Once I was sure I had enough food, I walked towards the table, hoping to spot Miroku and Inuyasha. I saw Miroku's hand shoot up in the air near the front of the table.
"Kagome-sama! Sango! We have some seats!" Miroku called out, still waving his hand in the air flamboyantly, as if we were little kids. I grab Sango's arm and quickly sashay over to the front of the table.
"Arigatou Miroku-kun," I thank, placing my food on the table. I let Sango sit next to Miroku, and sat on Sango's other side. I kneel down, and notice a tremendously large plate of food next to me and snort.
"I assume Inuyasha is sitting next to me," I state sarcastically, rolling my eyes. Miroku peels his attention away from Sango's face and looks in my direction.
"Yep, he just went to the pub to get a bottle of sake with Kouga-kun. But I recommend you don't drink the sake, Kagome-sama. Now that I know what you do with Inuyasha sober, I don't want to know the inappropriate things you would do with him intoxicated," Miroku said gingerly.
My face turned totally pink, and Sango turned towards me, her mouth agape.
"And what exactly were you and Inuyasha doing?" Sango inquired louder than necessary, and I put a hand over her mouth in order to keep her from speaking any more. Before she could continue, I heard from behind me a squabble.
"Stupid mangy wolf, you are not-" Inuyasha argued, but was cut off by his own gasp as he made eye contact with me. My cheeks turned rosy immediately as I sat under his hot gaze.
"Kagome…" he breathed, and was about to continue, but Kouga lunged in front of me unto one knee and clasp my hands between his.
"My dear Kagome, you are simply radiant tonight! Not that you always aren't, but you are nothing less of a goddess tonight, with how that kimono brings out the blue in your eyes or accommodates tastefully your beautiful body-" Kouga gushed complementary, but he was cut off by Inuyasha grabbing him from behind.
"Oi wolf, just shaddup and go sit at your seat! Sheesh, I thought I was going to lose my appetite listening to you babble away," Inuyasha exclaimed, but with less force than necessary. Come to think of it, Inuyasha was becoming a big softy now…
Wait, did he really just say what I thought he just said?!?
"Inuyasha, si-" I muttered, about to send Inuyasha to hell on my terms, but he covered my mouth just in time.
"Don't. Even," he warned, and as I looked up into his face, about to give him a piece of my mind, but I froze, my eyes locked on his form.
Inuyasha had taken a bath, washing the smudges of dirt that usually adorned his face from work. His long white hair actually looked tame and combed. His fire kimono had been washed, and looked bright red. On his feet, he wore socks and sandals like everyone else, which shocked me especially, because he hated shoes with the same intensity he hated Kouga.
Inuyasha actually looked…good?
"Whatcha staring at Kags?" Inuyasha asked gruffly as he kneeled down to sit next to me, setting down the bottle of sake. I quickly avert my gaze, and pick up my chopsticks.
"Nothing. Just…nothing," I amended, smiling up at his face. I saw his eyes cloud over a bit, and chuckle, turning back to my plate. Inuyasha shakes his head, as if to keep him from spacing out, and opens the bottle with his claw, pouring sake for him and I, then passing the bottle down the table.
"No sake for you Kagome-sama!" I heard Miroku shout, and his hand shot across the table to grab my glass. But, before he could reach it, I snatched it up and poured it in my mouth, downing the whole cup. I coughed, the burning sensation becoming unsettling.
Miroku laughed nervously. "Poor Kagome-sama. But do not fear, my friend! We will help you with your problems, whether it's sex or alcohol addiction," he declared openly, making valiant gestures.
I saw Inuyasha's eyes grow into saucers. "NANI?!?" Inuyasha and I fumed at the same time. Sango stared at all of us disbelievingly.
"I can't believe any one of you!" she exclaimed throwing her hands up into the air, but then proceeded to whap Miroku on the back of the head repeatedly.
"Ouch, ouch! Is this what I get for trying to help out friends, kami?!?" Miroku asked, obviously disheartened. Shippo spoke out for the first time that evening.
"I am surrounded by idiots," Shippo muttered, and the turned back to his task of coloring with some of the younger wolf demons that stayed behind for the party.
We ate our meal, talking with some of the wolf demons who had stayed behind, laughing and drinking merrily. Throughout the meal, I would look at Inuyasha from the corner of my eye coyly, only to see him keeping to himself, stuffing himself with seconds and thirds of food. Around eight at night, various musicians from the village gathered together and strike up a tune, drawing onlookers to a section of land lit up with different colored lanterns that I assumed was the dance floor. My mood immediately brightened.
"Sango-chan, let's dance!" I pipe, quickly grabbing her arm, leading her towards the dance floor, where a congregation of people was already forming. Many of the girls from the village were doing the same, as Sango and I, as the boys stood off to the side, awkwardly twiddling their thumbs. Only once and a while would a boy actually get the nerve to ask a girl to dance. I now understood that the phenomenon was universal, unfortunately.
After a couple of songs, to which Sango had to teach me the steps to, a song came on that I recognized. I let out a squeal of glee as I expertly twirled to the beat, the steps engraved into my brain after many years of cultural festivals from the modern age. I feel someone tap my shoulder from behind, and my heart skipped a beat, in hope that maybe Inuyasha had worked up the courage to ask me to dance. To my disappointment, it was not the dog demon who sat in front of me, but Kouga.
"Kagome, may I have this dance?" he asked nervously, which was surprising from Kouga. I smiled, happy at how sweet he was acting.
"Sure," I replied, and I took his hand, leading him out to the middle. As Kouga fumbled through the steps, I taught him how to move and exactly what to do. I was actually having fun, and Kouga was enjoyable company overall.
"Thank you for the dance. Maybe you can show me how to dance another time tonight?" he asked, the song dwindling to an end.
"That would be nice Kouga-kun! You are a very pleasant dance partner," I exclaimed, smiling brightly. A bit worn out from dancing myself, I head back to the table where Inuyasha was sitting, hoping to take a sip of water quick. As I near the table, I see Inuyasha face clearly, his expression dark as he clenched and unclenched his jaw.
I sat down, and grabbed a glass to drink and realized too late that is was sake. I sputtered again from the sensation, and then grimace, finally ready to address the current problem.
"What's wrong Inuyasha? How about we go dance?" I asked sweetly, hoping that I can lift his mood. He shook his head side to side slowly, almost smiling.
"It doesn't look like you need me. The mangy wolf is probably a better dancer than me," he leered huffily, crossing his arms.
I reeled from his exclamation. "Are you trying to say something?" I stated calmly, narrowing my eyes at Inuyasha.
"Ya looked pretty happy dancing with him, and I wouldn't want to ruin your night by parting you with your wolf lover," he replied sarcastically with more bite in his tone. His words felt like a slap across the face.
"What are you talking about? Kouga-kun is a friend-" I defended, but Inuyasha cut me off.
"Are ya blind Kagome, or just stupid? He had his putrid hands all over you-"
"That's how you dance to the song! You are being irrational, Kouga-kun did nothing inappropriate of the sort!" I cut him off with, my face reddening with anger. He was one more accusation from a sitting!
"Whatever Kagome," he muttered, getting up to walk towards the edge of the forest. I look back towards my cup of sake, downing the rest of the content, knowing I was going to need it.
I went back to the dance floor, determined to not let Inuyasha spoil my night. But after an hour of dancing, I concluded that my mind was drifting back to Inuyasha too much, and I set forth to set things right.
I went to the bar, hoping to find Miroku so I could maybe squeeze some information on where Inuyasha could be.
He was at the bar with Kouga and the rest of the wolf demon, drinking up a storm. Miroku only appeared a bit buzzed, so maybe he could be useful after all.
"Miroku-kun, do you know where Inuyasha ran off to exactly?" I asked, stopping him from taking another gulp of sake. He smiled.
"Well, if it isn't Kagome-sama! Inuyasha you say? Hmmmmm…. I saw some soul catchers earlier, if that helps…bloody idiot…" he rambled, but I stopped listening after "soul catchers".
There is only one person that could possibly be.
I immediately ran out of the bar, taking off my sandals and socks to increase my speed. I sprinted back in the direction of Kaede's hut, running down the path to the Sacred Tree. Sure thing, I see soul catchers in the canopy of the trees. When I was near the clearing of the Sacred Tree, I dodge to behind a tree to make sure Kikyo and Inuyasha wouldn't see me.
They were sitting on the roots of the Sacred Tree, talking intimately. Luckily, they were speaking loud enough for me to hear from my hiding place.
"…it's just I can't believe it! I don't know why Kagome danced with him, and not only that but defended him," Inuyasha ranted, and I huffed, rolling my eyes at how upset he was by it.
"If you went to hell with me, then you wouldn't have to worry about my incarnation's treacherous ways anymore. We could finally be together the way we hoped to be," Kikyo declared softly, cupping Inuyasha's cheek with her hand soothingly.
Inuyasha didn't make a move to push away her hand. "I dunno…this doesn't feel right. Maybe we weren't meant to be with each other. Have ya ever thought of that?" Inuyasha mused sentimentally, with more softness than I have ever seen him with.
Kikyo let go of Inuyasha and stood up, her back facing Inuyasha. "Do you love me Inuyasha?" she asked simply, and I gasped silently, knowing this was the moment of truth. She looked behind her towards Inuyasha with cold, calculating eyes.
He hesitated, his eyes hazed with doubt. Then, he opened his mouth and said quietly, "Without a doubt."
I think my world has shattered.
Love, life, meaning: all shattered in one second.
Tears clouded my vision. Why didn't I run away right now? Why was I torturing myself? But as I told my legs to move, they refused and all I could do was sit there, my hands clenching into the tree bark uncomfortably.
"Then be with me! Follow your promise through and follow me to the pits of hell. Fate plays no hand there, all the bitterness from fifty years ago can disappear, don't you see?" Kikyo pleaded, her voice playing more emotion in it than I have ever seen.
Inuyasha got up, walking towards Kikyo. "That's easy for you to say. You're dead, with nothing to lose, but I am alive and about to sacrifice my life-" he reasoned, but was cut off as Kikyo slammed herself into his chest, hugging him with all her might.
"Please Inuyasha? Please?" Kikyo begged, her voice wavering as if on the bridge of tears. Inuyasha made no move to respond, but he wrapped his arms around her small frame, hugging her close. He rested his cheek on the top of her head in a tender embrace as he has done with me a few times.
This was my breaking point. I can't bear this…
Trembling, I unlatched my sore fingers from the bark and forced my numb legs to move. I gain momentum, and before I know it, I am sprinting down the path, heading directly to Kaede's hut. Tears fall down my face in a torrential flood, the sadness threatening to overwhelm me.
There was always the threat that I would lose to Kikyo, but never had it become so real until this moment.
The battle was over. Kikyo was the victor. There was no debate.
I enter the hut hastily, gathering everything I recognized as mine and stuffing it into my oversized backpack. I tear out a few sheets of loose leaf from a random notebook in my backpack, and write a note to each of my friends: Sango, Miroku, Shippo, Kaede, and even Kouga. I place them in a place where I'm sure that they will see them, and walked out of the hut, taking one last time to absorb a place where I have grown up so much in.
It was time to go back home.
I walked back towards the well slowly, each step more painful than the last. My self-loathing increased tenfold the more I walked. I pulled sutras out of a pocket from my backpack and slip it into my kimono for safe keeping. I had the strongest premonition that I was going to run into Inuyasha before I went home, and they would probably come in handy. The last thing I needed was for him to follow me down the well, trying to convince me to come back with him.
I had been fighting for him for the past two years, and now it was time to fight for myself. I used to think they were the same thing, but Inuyasha's confession has changed the rules. Or maybe those were always the rules, and I was too blind to know them. Inuyasha's right, I am stupid.
Finally, I have reached the clearing with the well in the center. As I walk through the meadow, I pick a flower and put it in my hair, hoping that this would be my last memento of the feudal era, and of the blue skies and green pastures I have so loved. When I reached the well, I stroked the polished wood that Inuyasha fixed up. Only thinking of his name brings another round of tears, and I choke because of the combination of the burning sensation in my chest and the tears slowly suffocating me.
I throw my backpack down the well, and begin to paste sutras onto the well, sealing them with as much purification energy as I could, so Inuyasha could in no way pass through the well. Just as I finished with the last one, I hear a voice ring through the clearing.
"Kagome, where are you going?" Inuyasha asked, sounding as if he was only on the fringe of the meadow. His voice clears my head of emotions immediately surprisingly, and I stop crying, wiping my cheeks with back of my hand.
"I'm going back home," I simply state, my voice quivering from the amount of crying I had done.
"Going? But the festival…" Inuyasha asked confusingly, but he stops when I turn to face him, my eyes red from crying.
"God Kagome, what happened? What's going on?" he asked running over to me, totally clueless to the circumstances surrounding my mourning.
I shook my head, trying to not look at him. "Everything. I just can't take it anymore. I'm done with what I was supposed to do, the jewel is in our hands. I can stop troubling everyone and go home," I said slowly in a monotone voice.
"But what about wishing on the jewel?" Inuyasha asked frantically, fishing for an excuse to extenuate my stay.
"Kikyo can do that probably better than I do that. In fact, you would probably prefer she did it," I stated, spitting the last part at him.
"What if I want you to wish on it, not Kikyo?" Inuyasha drawled, holding onto my shoulders tightly as if I was about to disappear. My temper was on thin ice, and I exploded.
"Oh for God's sake! Let me be Inuyasha! I know all that you just said, hell, everything that you have ever said to me was a lie! I am a SHARD DETECTOR. THAT IS ALL I'LL EVER BE TO YOU," I shouted, pushing him roughly off me. My impassive façade finally broke, and two hot tears slid down my face. I turn around, about to jump into the well, but Inuyasha caught my wrist, gently reprimanding me, pulling me close to him.
"But…what if you aren't just a shard detector? What if you mean more?" Inuyasha asked frantically, grabbing my chin so I would look at him. I tilt my head to the side, keeping my eyes closed as tears spill down faster and faster. I shake my head, not allowing myself to believe his words.
"I-I…love you Kagome," Inuyasha nearly shouted, as if it would make the words sound true. I snap my eyes open, and my sorrow takes the steering wheel. My knees collapse, and Inuyasha sits down with me, his gaze never wavering.
"B-but, why now Inuyasha? Why!?! You knew I doubted myself time and time again, feeling doubtful about whether I was being compared to Kikyo or not, and you never said it!" I whisper, tears continuing to fall.
He continued to gaze at my face, formulating exactly why he hadn't said the words before.
"I thought actions spoke louder than words," he concluded, his molten gaze pulling me in. My stubbornness snapped me out of it, and my anger came back to haunt me.
"But you love Kikyo. You're going to hell with her. I lost Inuyasha, so could you stop taunting me with your false words of endearment?" I asked glaring at him. Inuyasha reeled as if I had slapped him.
"Excuse me?" he asked flatly, clearly trying to hold back some sort of emotion.
"I saw the whole thing, Inuyasha. According to my knowledge Inuyasha, you can't love two people at once," I whisper, tears welling up in my eyes again. Inuyasha didn't miss a beat though.
"How much did you see?" he asked concerned. I smirk. Typical Inuyasha to be more worried about saving his ass than anyone else.
I laughed harshly. "I saw everything. So I would appreciate if you didn't lie anymore and let me go," I stated in monotone again, gesturing to his grip on my hands. He let my hands go out of shock, and I wasted no time, getting up and headed towards the well. But, I was stopped yet again by Inuyasha's hand on my shoulder.
"But I'm not lying! Kagome…" Inuyasha trailed off, looking afraid to say the next part. He pulled something out of his pocket, which looked like a small gold chain with a locket on it. He slid it around my neck.
"What is this Inuyasha?" I asked wearily, prepared to make a run for the well. Inuyasha took a large gulp.
"Souta told me in your time that men usually gave their women rings if they were going to marry them. And I couldn't find a ring, so…" he drawled off, his ears on his head drooping. I gasped.
"You didn't…" I whispered. Inuyasha bent down and pressed his forehead against mine.
"It'll take a while to build a hut, but I think with some help we can have a wedding soon," he stated simply.
I cry, absolutely touched. "But what about Kikyo?" I asked before I could allow false hope of a future with Inuyasha.
"What about her?" Inuyasha asked coyly, clearly not wanting to answer the question. I scowled.
"Why can't you make a decision about who you want? Is it going to be Kikyo or me, Inuyasha? Pick now before my heart gets broken more than it needs to be!" I exclaimed, putting my hands on my hips.
Inuyasha opens his mouth several times as if to say something, but he closes it, remaining silent. His lack of an answer proving to be all the evidence I need, I slip the Sacred Jewel from around my neck and walk towards him.
"Inuyasha?" I asked softly to make sure I had his full attention. He looked down at me and before I could chicken out, I kissed him.
It was nothing erotic, it was a closed-mouthed kiss that lasted no longer than a couple of seconds. Inuyasha was too shocked by my boldness to respond, luckily.
"I love you Inuyasha. So, so much. And I'm probably never going to love anyone else. But your happiness means the world to me," I declared softly, and before he could speak, I slipped the jewel into his hand.
"If she's what you want, wish her back to life. I will no longer stand in the way of your happiness. Please don't worry of me. I love you," I assure, closing his fingers so that they engulfed the jewel. I kiss his knuckle, and dash back towards the well, not daring to look back.
I stand on the ledge and jump in, expecting to hit bottom, but someone grabs my wrist, leaving me suspended midair. I see Inuyasha's hand around my delicate wrist, and feel wetness sprinkling on the top of my head.
Inuyasha was crying.
"P-please, Kagome, don't leave me, please," Inuyasha plead without shame, his tears quickly sliding down his cheeks. I knew this last image of Inuyasha would always haunt me, but I had to do what was right for not only Inuyasha, but for me.
"I'm so sorry Inuyasha. I love you," I whisper, and I concentrated all my spiritual energy on my wrist. Inuyasha let out a yelp of pain and was forced to let go of my wrist because of the burning it caused him. My feet hit the bottom of the floor, and the blue light engulfed me, transporting me back to my time.
I was home. And I could never go back.
0.o.0
A/N: EMOTIONAL…OVERLOAD –again-. God, this chapter is making me depressed, lol. I hope all you Inuyasha fans liked it. I have heard many complaints on the Inuyasha/Kagome pairing, and on how much Inuyasha was a jerk-off in the last chapter. Understandable, yes. But I hope this chapter revealed a much more thoughtful/sensitive side of Inuyasha who is actually tender. Geez, I hope Inuyasha wasn't too OOC here…0.o
I gave Kagome a dose of feminism in here, which me likey. Woo Kagome for standing up for herself!
But, I hope you can see the reason for the Inuyasha/Kagome tension in chapter six, lol.
Okay, done rambling. (This is sad, it's a Friday night and I'm at home writing 17 pages…-mega sigh-).
REMEMBER, THE MORE REVIEWS, THE MORE WILLING I AM TO SIT AT HOME AND WRITE!!!
Love (as always :]),
The Pink Panda17
P.S. Since this was Kagome POV, I used a lot more Japanese terminology. And the reason for Miroku calling Kagome "Kagome-sama" (which in Japanese culture is used to address someone older than you) is that in the English dub of Inuyasha, Miroku calls Kagome "Miss Kagome", which I translate to "Kagome-sama". Towards the end of the series, he starts dropping the respectful endings and calls her "Kagome", but doing the sama was just too much fun!
P.S.S. The suffix "chan" is another respectful ending usually referring to a friend or close acquaintance (and usually among girls, I don't hear a lot of guys say it to other guys, lol)
