Palutena and Robin's Random and Ridiculously Stupid Adventure

Chapter 7: Grima


Robin stared down at the dark crevice right below. He had lost the Levin Sword again.

"Oh, great! I lost the Levin Sword again!"

That's exactly what I just said!

"Now what are we going to do? My Levin Sword is now stuck in a crevice!"

"We're gonna go down there, that's what we're gonna do!"

"Wait, what are you doiiiiiiiing?!" Robin asked as Palutena pushed him down the crevice and jumped down after him. He screamed as he fell down the dark crevice, and then he landed face-first onto the ground, and before he could get up she fell and landed on top of him once again.

"Thanks for the cushion, Rowan!"

"C-Can you stop falling on top of me?" Robin asked as he got up, and he looked up and saw that they were now stuck at the bottom of the crevice, and his Levin Sword was nowhere to be seen.

"It's dark down here, Ronin! I think we should get out of here."

"You think?! Palutena, you pushed us down this crevice and you are the reason why we are now stuck here! How are we going to be able to get back up?!"

"Wait, Raven! I think I see something over there!"

"Where?"

"Over there!" Palutena pointed to what looked to be some kind of cave, and there was some torches on the walls which provided light. "Maybe your crooked looking thing is in there!"

"How would my Levin Sword get in there?"

"I don't know, but let's go in there!" Palutena was about to run inside the cave when Robin stopped her.

"Wait, Palutena. We should be careful when going in here. There could be all kinds of booby traps in this place."

"Hee hee, you said booby!" Palutena giggled immaturely, and then pointed to her own boobs. "Get it? Booby?"

"Hilarious." Robin rolled his eyes. "Look, I do not want to waste a lot of time here. Let us just hurry up and get my Levin Sword and get out of here before..." He walked into the cave, but was stopped when a spear suddenly shot out from somewhere and into the wall right in front of his face. Robin slowly moved away and turned to Palutena. "Palutena, do not move. Got that?"

"Okay."

"Good." Robin began to slowly walk down the path, being extra careful not to step on any tiles that could trigger a trap. He managed to make it to the other side without activating any traps, but then there was a strange sound from somewhere, and he turned around and saw another spear flying in the air right towards him. Robin screamed and quickly ducked right when the spear flew by and hit the wall right above him. He then looked up and saw that Palutena had walked into the cave steped on the trap tiles. "What did I say about not moving a muscle?!"

"Sorry, Ronald. You were taking forever and I couldn't wait any longer."

"You know what? N-Never mind that! Just hurry up and get over here!"

"Okay." Palutena then walked down the path and managed to get to the other side without activating any traps.

"Alright. Let us just hurry up and get my Levin Sword and then figure out some way to get our of here." Robin began to walk into a room, but then stopped when he saw that it was a dead end. "Oh, what is this?!" Two levers rested on the wall.

"Look, Roland! Levers! I love pulling levers!" Palutena was about to pull one of the levers when Robin stopped her.

"No wait, Palutena! Do not touch any of those levers! One of them might be a trap. We just have to figure out which one would be the correct one and which one would be..."

"Let's pull the right one! The right lever is always the right one to pull!"

"I do not think that is always true, Palutena. I say we should pull the left one."

"No Richard, let's pull the right one!"

"I said we are pulling the left lever!"

"But I wanna pull the right one!"

"We are pulling the left one!" Palutena and Robin then began to argue back and fourth debating on whether which lever they should pull.

"Right one!"

"Left one!"

"Right one!"

"Left one!"

"Right!"

"Left!"

"Right!"

"Left!"

"Right!"

"Left!"

"Left!"

"Right!"

"Left!"

"Listen, Palutena! We are going to pull the right lever and that is final!" Robin went over to the two levers and pulled the right one, but his eyes widened when he realized something. "Wait a minute. Did you just trick me into pulling the right lever?!"

"Uhh...I don't know."

Robin was about to walk towards Palutena, but then a trapdoor opened up from right under his feet. "Oh, I should have knoooooooooown!" He screamed as he fell down the trapdoor.

"Raymond? Where did you go?" Palutena asked, and then she looked down the hole where Robin had fell in. "Don't worry, Ronin! I'm coming for you!" She then jumped into the hole after him.

Robin screamed as he slid down a dark tunnel. He then shot out of a chute and landed on his stomach in another dark room.

"Ow...talk about a rough landing." Suddenly, Robin heard someone yelling from behind him, and before he could get up and move out of the way, Palutena then shot out of the chute and crashed right into him.

"That was fun! I wanna do it again!"

"I-I definitely do not." Robin groaned as he got up. "Oh, great. Where are we now?"

"We went down that fun slide because we pushed the right level!"

"Oh, we pushed the right lever alright." Robin muttered as he looked around. "Now we are lost! How are we going to find my Levin Sword now?!"

"Roland, look! There's your crooked looking thing!"

Robin looked to see that in a room not too far away was his sword. "The Levin Sword!" He quickly ran over to the room and looked around to see if there were anything else in there. "And there are no bats here either, but we should still be-"

"Let's go jump in, Ronald!"

"Palutena, no!" Robin shouted as Palutena jumped into the room, but she landed safely without making too much noise.

"Come on down, Ronin!"

"Alright." Robin sighed as he then jumped down. He then looked up to see that Levin Sword was on some kind of hill. "I am going to go and get the Levin Sword. Just stay right there and do not do anything stupid, got that?"

"Okay."

"Good." Robin went up on the hill to his Levin Sword, but once again it was stuck. He tried to pull on it with all his might, but it wouldn't budge. "Oh, why does it always have to be stuck?!"

"Okay, I just gotta stay here and not do anything stupid. I can do this." Suddenly, Palutena began to hear some kind of eerie noise from behind her, and she slowly turned around and gasped when she saw something staring at her. "R-R-Raymond!"

"Wh-What is it, Palutena?" Robin asked as he still tried to pull out his sword.

"Th-There's a monster!"

"Monster? What do you mean there is a-"

Suddenly, there was a loud roar that echoed through the room, causing Palutena to scream and Robin to lose his balance and he quickly grabbed onto the creature's side. The creature then got up and glared right at Palutena with its six glowing red eyes.

"Who DARE disturb the deep slumber of Grima?!" The creature roared.

"Grima?" Robin asked in confusion, but then his eyes widened in horror. "Oh, no..."

"Foolish mortal! You have made a huge mistake coming here!" Grima shouted as he cornered Palutena against the wall.

"A-Are you gonna eat me?" Palutena asked in fear.

"Maybe. That depends on what kind of death is more slow and painful for you. But before I end you, I must give you a little introduction as to who I am." Grima then made a clicking noise, and then out of nowhere, music started up as he starting singing.

(Based on the song Shiny from Moana)

The mighty Grima hasn't always been this grand

I was a weak little soul once

Now I know I can be feared by the whole planet

'Cause I'm unstoppable, baby

Did your friends all say listen to your heart?

You don't belong to the dark side?

I need four words to tear their arguments apart

Your friends all lied

I'd rather be Grima

Being worshipped by mortals with common sense

Sacrifice and do it for Grima

I will bring forth the destruction of the world, in a snap

Don't you know, men are dumb, dumb, dumb

When it comes to their religions, curmudgeons

Oh, and here they come, come, come

To the God of Annihilation

Hey, free killings

I just love suffering, and it looks like your end

(Grima is about to kill Palutena, but then notices Robin trying to pull out the Levin Sword from his back)

Well, well, well, little Robin's having trouble with his sword

You little silly foolish tactician

Ouch! What a terrible performance

What a shock! (Get it?)

You don't swing it like you used to, man

Yet I have to give you credit for my start

And your emblem on the outside

For just like you I'm just as evil in the heart

I'll never change, I can't, 'cause I'm Grima

Watch me plunge the world into a world of dark

In this world you will obey Grima

Send your armies but they'll never be enough

My hide's too tough, Robin man

You could try, try, try

But you can't expect a tactician to beat the Fell Dragon (Look it up)

You will die, die, die

Now it's time for me to take apart your Grima's Heart

Far from the ones who adopted you

Chasing the love of those humans who made you feel wanted

You tried to be tough, but your bonds are just not strong enough

Robbie! Now it's time to kick your heinie

Ever seen someone like Grima

Soak it in 'cause it's the last you'll ever see

C'est la vie mon ami, I am Grima

Now I'll kill you so prepare your final plea, just for me

You never will defeat Grima

You better bow down to Grima

"Wow, that was a great song! Sing it again!"

"NO! I do not have time to be singing to stupid mortals! It is time for you to DIE!" Grima shouted, and then he grabbed Palutena with his fangs, causing her to let out a scream of pain.

"Oh, no! I cannot let Grima hurt Palutena!" Robin climbed onto Grima's back and quickly reached for the Levin Sword and pulled with all his might, and he finally managed to pull it out. He then ran down the dragon's back and onto his head. "Oh, I really did not think I would have to do this." Robin then raised his Levin Sword and slammed it down, stabbing Grima in one of his eyes. The Fell Dragon let out a loud roar of pain and let go of Palutena, and Robin quickly jumped down and caught her.

"Th-Thank you, Ronald."

"You can thank me later, Palutena! We have to run!" Robin said as he ran with her out of the room.

Once Grima had recovered from the attack on his eye, he looked around and saw that the two mortals were gone. "Oh, you can run as much as you can, but you cannot hide from Grima!" He then got up and began to chase after the two of them.

Robin continued to run, holding his sword with one hand and Palutena with the other arm. "Are you alright, Palutena?"

"Y-Yes, I...I think I can walk." Palutena answered weakly.

"Alright." Robin set Palutena down, and he started to look around for a way out. "There has got to be some way out of here."

Suddenly, the ceiling broke from right above them and Robin quickly grabbed Palutena and moved them out of the way before the boulders fell on them. "Quick, Palutena! Go in there!" They then ran into another room right before the stone wall closed.

"You cannot escape from Grima!" Grima shouted as he began to slam his head against the stone wall repeatedly.

Robin began to panic and he frantically looked around to try to find an exit. "Okay. Okay. Do not panic, Robin. We can get out of here. There must be some kind of way to-"

"Hey Richard, look!" Robin looked to see Palutena looking at a hatch in the ceiling. "Es-cah-pay! Hey, it kinda looks like the word-"

"Escape!" Robin gasped, and he quickly opened the hatch and climbed up to the top. "Quick, Palutena! Grab my hand!"

Suddenly, the stone wall collapsed and Grima's head peeked right through. "Heeeeeere's Grima!"

"Hurry, Palutena!"

"Okay!" Palutena quickly grabbed onto Robin's hand and he pulled her up to the top where they were now at the top of some kind of temple.

"Oh, where are we now?! Come on, Palutena! Let us just get out of here before-"

Suddenly, the ground from right below them and Grima emerged. "Run as you may, but you will not hide from Grima!"

"Quick Palutena, run!"

"Okay!" Palutena shouted as they began to run with Grima chasing after them. "Richard, where are we?"

"I do not know, Palutena! Just keep running and do not say another woooooooooooord!" Robin screamed as the two of them suddenly ran off the edge of the and began to fall down the side of the temple. They then fell down to the ground and several rocks fell from the top of the temple and landed on top of them.

Grima looked around from the top of the temple, but he couldn't see the two of them anywhere. "Foolish mortals. They got lucky. Those fools do not matter now. I am free, which means I can go destroy the world again!" He then started to fly away.

Once there was nothing but silence in the sky, Robin lifted the boulders off of him and Palutena, and gasped when he saw Grima flying away in the distance. "Grima...Oh, no."

"What is it, Roland?"

"Grima...oh no, we reawakened Grima!"

"Who's Grima?" Palutena asked.

"Did you even pay attention to the song?! Grima is the mighty Fell Dragon and he is going to on the world! We have to go stop him before he gets to Origin Peak and gets to his full power! We have to go stop him as soon as possible, but I do not think we can do it alone."

"Who?"

"I know someone who has helped me stop Grima before. Maybe he can help us. Come on, we have no time to lose!" Robin was about to walk away, but stopped when he realized something. "Oh, how are we even going to get back to the barracks?!"

"Wanna try flying again?"