Harry Potter and the DAC chapter 7: ..

A few hours later, we all found ourselves at lunch just as before. Ron looked pathetic as he held his wandin one hand, and taped it up with the other.

"Go ahead and say it." He said blindly to no one.

"Say what?" Harry asked.

"I'm doomed." Ron said looking at his wand once more, sitting the look of absolute dread in his eyes as he probably pondered the punishment by his mother. Whom I sometimes feared myself. Harry took a deep breath and took a glance at the wand for himself.

"You're doomed." He sighed. I went about my own business. For some reason I sat there, not interacting, not particularly wanting to talk to anybody. I felt like I had been placed on the wrong side of the glass and I was just watching everyone. Kids laughing, chattering away as they munched on their lunches. Shavai sitting by Oliver Wood whispering in his ear; Megan sitting beside Harry with one hand on his shoulder throwing her head back laughing while he shyly giggled to himself staring down at the floor. Then something clicked and my mind zoomed in on three girls at the Slytherin table. Darcie, Whitney and Katie were uncontrollably laughing and their eyes drooped over their eyes. And the most noticeable feature had to be the part surrounding the irises. Instead of white, they were dark pink - almost red. And they constantly ate and when they finished their plates, they reached for more.

I brought my attention back to the table with a camera flash in my face.

"Hi! I'm Collin!" He announced looking at Harry. Harry replied with a modest 'hi', Megan almost fell over from the sudden flash. I personally wanted to break it, or make him eat it. The more I looked at the blonde little boy, the more his teeth reminded me of a beaver. I couldn't understand why, but he did.

I tried my best to ignore the screaming a few minutes later from Ron's mother who found out about him stealing the car. He had a horrified look on his face as he turned towards me and said,

"It's your fault, you know that."

"How is it my fault? I merely suggested that you take your parents' car." I said in my defence. I still stared at Darcie and her delinquints wondering why the hell they looked the way they did. Then I wondered if I was going crazy.

"Exactly, Delaney." Ron cocluded. "You're the bleedin' devil, you are!" With that being said, he threw a roll at me. I picked it up and threw it back, laughing. Wow, human contact in an unreal-world. Maybe we were here purely to take up space. Until we were sent home anyway, I rationed. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.

"So, Delaney. Did you ever get a howler?" Ron asked as he took a sip from his cup. I quickly shook my head.

"Nope. If I ever got a howler from my parents all it would have is a recording of them having a stroke."

After lunch, we found ourselves (unfortunately) in the Defence Against the Dark Arts class with Gilderoy Lockhart. The pompass wind-bag from the book shop. I dreaded when he would get into his story. I looked at his clothes as he told the stories of his rewards and minor accomplishments I knew to be bullshit. Some girls upfront were fawning and drooling over every word he said. They seemed to writhe in pleasure from the words raping their brain and by the time he was finished, they looked like they were ready for a cigarette.

His clothes and smile disgusted me. Gold. From head to toe, GOLD! His hair, his cape, his shirt. All a faded, ugly, orange-ish gold, gold, gold! I zoned out watching his mouth as he went on and on and suddenly, there were just two lips going on and on. He walked down the mini-flight of stairs over to a bird cage, veiled by a purple cover.

"...You may find your worst fears in this room." He said, going nearer to the cage as it shook wildly. "Only know that no harm can befall you whilst I am here." He beamed a cheesy smile and one girl almost melted in the front row. He stood next to the cage with one hand on the veil, with all of a showman's flair. "I must ask you not to scream..." He said with a short pause.

"It might," He gripped the veil tightly and whipped it from the cage as he finished his sentence. "Provoke them!"

The cage contained little electric blue creatures, each about eight inches tall, flying around the cage trying their hardest to get out. They had pointed faces and wings; they gripped the bars and rattled them and pulled faces at the students it saw. I grabbed hold of my textbook, knowing what was about to happen. Megan and Shavai did the same.

"Explain to me how Girl-or-boy got the job of Defence Against the Dark Arts?" Shavai whispered to me and Megan. We both chuckled at the new nick name. Neville became pale and slumped back in his seat as far as it would go. Seamus merely scoffed at the sight.

"Cornish pixies?" He questioned.

"Freshly caught Cornish pixies." Gilderoy corrected. Unable to control himself, Seamus snorted loudly at the mockery of a professor.

"Laugh if you will, Mr. Finnegan." Gilderoy advised, "but pixies can be devilishly tricky little blighters." He made his hand's way to the door of the cage. "Let's see what you make of them NOW!" He emphasized the word as he flung the door open. Pixies went everywhere, almost instantly the little devils took to the ink wells and began spraying students, they shredded unguarded books, and broke the beakers that were out in plain view. Two flew around Neville and he batted at them with his hands, but they seized him by the ears and began flying him circularly around near the ceiling. Gilderoy watched the chaos enfold around him, obviously panicked.

"Come on, round them up. Round them up." He said as his voice cracked - obviously afraid realizing what he'd done. "They're only pixies!" He said adding it on as reassurance more for himself than the students.

"Ow! Damnit, let go!" I heard Shavai cry as one of them took to pulling her multi-braided hair. I hurried up from my desk to her and batted the pixie across the room with my book.

"You okay?" I asked her as I continued to run around the desks batting at pixies whenever one was unfortunate to slow down long enough to meet ends with my book. Harry, Ron and Hermione took to doing the same and ducking under desks. Slowly and carefully, we made our way to them.

"This man is an imbecile!" I said to no one in particular.

"He's a bleedin' nightmare!" Megan said agreeing.

"He needs to spend money on some brains instead of that damn teeth whitner!" Shavai yelled as her hand collided and slapped a pixie towards the roof. Gilderoy brandished his wand.

"He's one of the greatest wizards of our time!" Hermione insisted as she continued to fiercly fight the numerous pixies surrounding us.

"Peskipiski Pesternomi!" Gilderoy flung his wand carelessly around. The spell had no effect on the pixies and did nothing to the situation. The pixies were fine, we were fine. Someone needed to take his wand away. Just as I had this thought, one fairy stuck its tongue out at him and grabbed his wand. Immediately, Gilderoy joined the stampede of students heading towards the door.

"I'll ask you six to just nip them all back into their cage." Gilderoy said as his face had panic written all over it.

"You're not just gonna leave us here! You rude mother-" With a doorslam, Shavai's statement was cut short as Gilderoy disappeared. "Ugh!"

"Screw him!" Ron said as he swatted at a pixie that was getting too close to his head for comfort. "What do we do now?"

Hermione launched into action and hoisted herself up onto a nearby desk and flung her wand into the air.

"Immobilous!" The pixies slowed almost to a complete hault in midair. We all looked up at poor Neville, who by this time, was hanging from an iron chandelier in the middle of the room several feet from the ground. He looked at us, helpless and asked,

"Why is it always me?"

Fresh from the fight with the pixies, we walked to the next class through the courtyard. We were a sight. Robes almost shredded, hair askew, Neville practically peed in his pants from the ordeal.

"Can you believe him?" Ron asked everybody for their oppinons.

"I'm sure Professor Lockhart just wanted to give us some hands-on experience." Hermione chimed in. We rolled our eyes at the statement.

"Hands on? Hermione, he didn't have a clue what he was doing." Harry said. We passed a couple cement benches and had to split for a moment, only to come back together ater walking around it.

"Rubbish. Read his books. You'll see all the amazing things he's done." Hermione clutched her books to her chest as she defended her crush.

"He SAYS he's done." Ron countered, making it clear he wasn't nearly fooled by his fumbling 'know-it-all' exterior.

A few hours went by, the air became a tad humid as though it were going to rain. The sky became cloudy, but it never did. But it had a light breeze that came through every once in a while. Hermione thought it would be a good idea to study outside with Ron. Megan and Shavai decided to take a nap in Gryffindor's common room, but I decided to go see why Darcie looked the way she did at lunch. I walked around the courtyard and eventually found my way still within the walls, but a little farther than usual from the castle. I decided to turn back when suddenly a pungent odor found its way to my nose. It smelled sweet but at the same time smelled a little foul. I found myself being curious as a kitten and following the unusual aroma. I followed it to a place I never thought I would: The backside of Hagrid's hut. There I stood behind the corner and looked over. There sitting in a semi-circle, was Darcie, Whitney, Katie and to my suprise: Hagrid. For a moment I didn't see anything until Hagrid grabbed a tobacco pipe from Darcie and pulled out what looked like a small marble bag with draw strings and looked like it was made from leather. He pulled some green plant out, broke it up and stuffed a small bit into the pipe then put it to his lips, and lit it.

I watched Hagrid's eyes roll to the back of his head, and saw Katie spread out in the grass while Whitney was making a crown of daisies. I cleared my throat.

"Ahem!" They all looked over, panicky. Hagrid dropped the pipe out of his mouth and some of the contents spilled into his beard and started to make it smoke. I ran over and started padding his beard with my bare-hands. Immediately, I pulled them back.

"It's not wha' it looks like miss!" He tried to tell me. Darcie stood up, almost falling to the side before regaining her balance and leaned on Hagrid.

"It's alright." Darcie said. "You don't have to act like we're-" Darcie paused and looked around.

"We're?" Hagrid questioned after a moment. Darcie looked up at him.

"I forgot." Darcie said.

"Dude, I have ten toes! And TEN fingers!" Whitney looked at her red and black striped toe socks and her hands. "This is such a coin-key-dink." Darcie ran to her friend and laid in the grass.

"No way!" Darcie took her shoes off and her socks and saw for herself. "Well, I'll be damned." I tried my best to stay on the subject.

"Darcie, where on earth did you find weed?" I asked her standing over her.

"Um... Sprouty, Sprout." Darcie thought for a moment. "Yeah, Professor Sprout's greenhouse." She slugged Katie on the shoulder to wake her up, who was asleep snoring, and drooling in the grass.

"Ow..." She moaned and sat up rubbing where Darcie hit her.

Just then, we heard someone throwing up. Hagrid passed the pipe to me and headed towards the front to see who was there. It was Ron accompanied by Harry and Hermione. I looked at the pipe in my hand and decided it was time to loosen up. After all, you only live once.

With every possible measure taken to insure that Tom Riddle would not come about, he wouldn't, so we had nothing to worry about. At least, I hoped we didn't. We did everything we could. There would be no scary dudes in this one, no you-know-who, or any psuedonym he has.

Right?