Tuesday September 15th, Week 2 Day 7

"CLASS IS IN SESSION!"

Mario couldn't hold back tears.

"Don't cry, it only encourages him," Luigi whispered to him.

"NO WHISPERING!" Ganondorf threw a sword at Luigi which went right through his hat.

"Where do you keep on getting all those things? We destroyed six yesterday!" Link asked.

"E-Bay," Ganondorf replied. "Anywho, we have science first period. So gather up your earthly possessions and mark on this map how big you think the explosion will be!" He pulled out a map and held out a pen. "Come on, don't be shy…"

"We're being afraid, not shy," Marth told him.

"Just for that, Marth gets to hold the acid. Now anyone else feel like being a smart-ass?" Ganondorf growled. Everyone shook their heads. "Okay, then come and mark down your guess."

"We had math this day last week, didn't we?" Roy asked.

"Dude, this is Ganondorf," Link said. "Either last week was a testing week, he has no schedule planned or he just wants to see us suffer in any way possible."

"A little bit of all three," Ganondorf said, shrugging. "Now I only have three safety goggles, I get one, so you all have to fight over the last two."

They all went into the science room. "Today we make tantalum from vinegar and baking soda. Any questions on this?"

"Are you clinically insane?" Bowser asked.

"Well I go to a psychiatrist every Saturday at 2:00, his name is Gunter, so I'd have to say yes," Ganondorf informed them. "Although he says I'm making progress, since I didn't kill the mailman in these last two weeks."

"So that's why the mailman kept changing!" Peach pointed out.

"Exactly! Now, time to distribute the goggles. I want you all to line up at the back and I'll put the two at the front. Whoever get there first gets them!" When this happened, he tripped Mario. In the end, Giga Bowser and Pikachu got them.

"Time to demonstrate how to make tantalum. Watch. I grab some baking soda in a can and spit in it. Mix it around, add some vinegar, and put it in a microwave for 4 minutes," Ganondorf explained as he did so. "My Gerudo spit caused it to react this way, but I'm sure most of you should have the same effect. Yes Marth?"

"When can I stop balancing this acid on my head?" he asked fearfully.

"WHEN YOUR MOTHER AGREES TO GO OUT ON A DATE WITH ME!"

"But she died in a tragic horse riding accident!" Marth yelled. "No one's sure how, she was approaching the horse, next thing we knew, she was drowning in a bucket of water… Never listened to us when we told her that you can't get stuck in water…"

There was an awkward silence.

"Moving on… start your experiments."

They all spit in their baking soda, having different effects. The Bowser's caught fire, the Links hardened, G&W's came to life and started attacking students, Roy never got a chance as he was fending off G&W's, Mario's exploded so the other humans didn't try, Kirby accidentally inhaled his, DK's actually moistened, and those were the interesting ones. It is a bit obvious that no one's turned into tantalum.

"YOU ALL FAIL! Except you Jigglypuff, you got magnesium, close… but the rest of you, stay after class and clean up Mario!"

"First period has barely started," Link told him.

"Oh…" Ganondorf was silent for a moment before he got an evil smile. "Time for the explosion I promised!" He pushed a button on the desk, but nothing happened. "Dammit, Luigi! Go to the boiler room and pull the green lever!"

"But-"

"NOW!"

They all waited a few minutes before there was a loud boom. Ganondorf looked out the window and then at him map. "And the winner is Kirby! He gets a cupcake."

Luigi walked into the room, covered in soot and blood. Giving Ganon the finger, he walked back to his seat.

"Now that the amusing incident is over, time for NEXT PERIOD! MOVE! NOW!"

He chased them out of the classroom swinging his swords like a maniac until they were in the cooking room.

"Now I teach you how to make картофель!"

"What?" the whole class asked.

"NO QUESTIONS! Now, scoop out the middle of the картофель and mix it with сыр, this may take me a minute… and add a few spices… Voila! Now put it back in the картофель like so and you have a perfect meal!" Ganondorf explained.

"Why were you talking like that if you were standing explaining it to us?" Young Link asked. "Nevermind, I know… 'No questions…'."

"ARE YOU MOCKING ME?"

"No, but… Kirby is!"

"Wha-djsoifhfodsoiusfdovylivcsaclp9qwh!" Lots of pain was brought to Kirby.

Ganondorf looked at all of them. "Now, you'll see I have exactly 164 ingredients on the shelf to your left. You only need 2 ingredients and spices. If you get anything wrong, I KILL YOU! Simple as that."

"I've known you for what, 9 days now, and I still find your methods extreme," Roy told him.

"I take PRIDE in my ability to scare the LIVING CRAP OUT OF PEOPLE! Now make MY DINNER!"

"What?"

"QUIET GIGA!"

They all lined up, preparing to grab two ingredients. Ganondorf stood behind him, looking at Bowser who was first in line as he ran a sword sharpener along his sword. Bowser slowly reached out and grabbed a raspberry, and managed to hide in his shell before Ganondorf stabbed him.

"Fuck, STUPID SHELL! NEXT!"

Marth was scared, having no shell. So when he grabbed a banana and Ganondorf swung at him, he joined Bowser inside the shell.

"Get out. NOW," Bowser ordered.

"Can I go out the backdoor? Ganondorf's out front!" Marth pleaded.

"Fine. But watch out for my tomato plants!" There was the noise of someone going down a set of stairs, walking around, and opening a door. Marth crawled out the tail hole.

"Moving on from this strange situation, CONTINUE!"

-After no one was right-

"IDIOTS! Картофель is POTATO and сыр is CHEESE! I SHOULD EVISERATE YOU WHERE YOU STAND! But the law suit would be hell, so I'll go with one. Mario, get over here!"

"He died," Link said.

"Really? I forgot already, I guess it's too common," Ganondorf muttered. "In that case… um, NESS!"

"He died during Ganonball, Zelda forgot about him," Link also said. "In fact, I think his body is still in the gym!"

-The gym-

Crazy Hand took out a stick to poke the fly attracting carcass that was Ness. But for Crazy to hold it, it had to be a BIG stick, and it ended up squishing him. Crazy knocked out a squirrel, gave it the stick and put it beside Ness before running like his life depended on it.

-Ganondorf-

"Now we continue. WHAT'S NEXT ON THE SCHEDULE?"

"Um, lunch?" Jigglypuff suggested.

"HAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAAAHAHAAAAAAAAAAA! No."