Chapter Seven

Truly Amazing

Bella slept in the backseat of Jacob's rabbit. She curled up in the corner, her arms wrapped under her chest, her hair splayed over her peaceful face. Jasper had reached his arm back, his hand on her ankle soothing her to sleep. He kept his hand on her encouraging sweet dreams, at least that was part of the reason. He had to know that she hadn't disappeared like a beautiful phantom. She was safe, he hadn't killed her, and he wasn't trapped within the confines of his mind. She was safe, and as many times as he silently repeated that, it wasn't the same as touching her, for his own assurance.

Jacob kept up a slur of curse words under his breath as he rubbed his hands over the wheel. He didn't oppose but his stabs of fury were plenty to get the picture that he didn't like what he saw. The jealousy that swam deeply under the surface was an increasing annoyance. Jasper had to direct him somehow, before he really did snap, but changing his emotions again wasn't going to do the trick.

"What was Bella like when she was little?," he asked. It was a question that plagued his mind at times, though he had never been courageous enough to ask Edward.

Jacob glimpsed once at him, debating whether or not to answer. He did. "About the same. Older than her age, clumsy..."

He chuckled. "That sounds like her." He rubbed his thumb over the top of her foot, hoping that he didn't cause her to become too cold. They should have asked for a blanket, something to keep her warmer. The blasted heat from the vents was making Jacob sweat.

It was hard to imagine that Bella couldn't possibly know who they were. After all the grief she'd been through, after all the trouble they caused her, it was amazing that it wasn't permanently sketched into her brain. Right then, as ironic as it sounded, she had never been safer. She was with them, she was sound asleep, she was with two strong creatures, albeit that normally was a deficiency of her safety, but they were in complete control. Jasper had never been in more control.

The heat of the car made her scent stronger, and although Jacob's scent diminished hers it was there. If he hadn't known what it felt like to almost lose her, he knew then. It wasn't the same as taking her life as he almost tried on her last birthday. Even as he lunged at her he understood that she was safe with Emmett, Edward, Alice, and Carlisle, with all of them. They wouldn't let him hurt her. However, the car accident, no one was around to save her, except him, and he failed to stop it. It wasn't his job and he realized such. He comprehended then why Edward was as protective of her as he was. She was truly delicate. Anything could happen, right then, she could never wake up.

"We'll have to tell her about us," Jasper stated aloud, a thought that roamed the back of his mind until it came to the forefront and out of his mouth. It was an odd thing to say, all things considering.

He was opposed to telling Bella what they were the first time. When he learned of her knowledge he concluded detailed plans of how he would bloodlessly kill her. He didn't even have to be the one, Rose wanted her dead too. She could have cut the brake lines of her truck. She would've faced the possible death she had faced that day, in her truck, on her way to school.

It would have worked if Edward and Alice had allowed them. They didn't, and because of them Bella was alive. It was them she had to thank for living long enough to forget them.

No thought had ever made him sadder, the moment Bella looked at him and there was not a flicker of recognition. There was just surprise and disbelief at his words that they were friends. She was right to disbelieve it. They were never friends, they couldn't be, Edward asked him not to go near her longer than he had to.

Jasper honestly didn't want to tell her. It wasn't safe, not with the Volturi. If they found out all was lost. Bella would die and so would every one of the Cullen's. The chances of that happening though were slim, and she was smart, she would figure it out if they didn't tell her, just like she had last time.

Jacob sighed heavily, the burden sinking into him. "Yes, or come up with a damn good reason why you don't eat and I have a constant temperature."

She mewed lightly in her sleep, and Jasper composed himself again.

"She'll react the same, won't she," Jacob inquired worriedly.

"She's still the same... The situation is different... She was in love with Edward, nothing about him would've bothered her. And she was used to the idea of mythical creatures when you told her about yourself -"

"She guessed -"

"I don't know what this time will be like..." He read the speedometer. The car was only going sixty miles per hour. Normally it would have felt like a crawl to him, but it lengthened his time with the sleeping beauty. Beauty... Jasper had always thought of her that way, but... She was his brother's and any further thoughts were forbidden. He stopped himself for so long it was habit.

Jacob slowed to a stop outside of the apartment. Mentally Jasper felt around him and when no emotions came except the frustration and worry from Jacob, and the fog of happiness from Bella's dreams, he rushed out and gathered her in his arms. She was as light as a feather, a very warm feather that pushed itself against him. He carried her slowly to the door.

"I could've done that," Jacob growled to him.

"I didn't want her to wake, I need to touch her so only she can feel the calm."

Agitated, Jacob couldn't argue.

As they passed through the hallway to the apartment, Jasper could see that the hole in the wall had yet to be fixed, but the door had been replaced, the smell of fresh green paint wafting in the small enclosure.

Jacob took out a small pick and inserted it into the keyhole. He jiggled and it swung open. "We'll get the new key later."

He laid her on her bed, covering her to her chin. He swept her hair to the side, admiring every facet of her, the movement of her lids, her plump lips, the arch of her brows, and the blood rushing through every vein, spiderwebs in her pale arms.

He withdrew quickly then, and sat at the far end under the window, not once taken his eyes off of her. He tasted the serene atmosphere that she was in, safe in her hazy world of dreams, the nightmares locked in a unattainable place in her mind.

"You can't have her," the dog said simply, almost... Sympathetically.

"I don't want her."

"She's not your brother's anymore."

His head snapped up, their eyes meeting, brown to gold, but he didn't have to see him to know of his perception. "You read a lot into things, don't you?"

"Like what I told Bella: I pay attention."

***

A bronze haired boy sat across from a lovely pixie-like girl, a chess board between them. They were both uncommonly beautiful. They sat hunched over, concentrating on their unmoving pieces. They were like a statue set in a everyday setting, not belonging. The girl with spiky black hair, and small features grinned suddenly, knocking over a piece.

"Good game, brother," she congratulated as the boy sneered playfully.

Bella tried to hold onto the dream. She tried to make sense of it. Who were those two? Why didn't they move any of the miniatures? How could they tell who won? It was strange, but more so that in the dream she found it so ordinary. She lost it when she opened her eyes to the cracked ceiling.

"Awake?"

Jacob sat hunched over on the edge of her bed, a tray of steaming chicken soup on his lap. She propped herself up against her headboard and he laid it over her legs, the smell banishing any of the tangled worries she had. She caught Jasper's eye from where he sat under the window, disconnected from the scene.

"Thank you."

"He made it," Jasper clarified.

She shrugged picking up the spoon. "Will you tell me more about my life in Forks?"

"Are you sure you don't remember anything, Bells," Jacob asked pleadingly.

"I'm sure."

Jasper left his station and came to sit on her other side. He looked deep into her eyes and she stared right back. The golden light that was his gaze read every facet of her, but she didn't look away, she found herself leaning forward reading him back. His kindness, his waver, his intelligence, and the beauty an angel would be envious of.

He jerked back quicker than she had see anyone move. Then he chuckled, and she wondered if she missed a joke somewhere. "She'll be fine," he laughed. "She'll handle it well."

Jacob appeared confused but he shook his head. "Later. We'll tell you later, Bells. Go on, eat."

"Tell her something, Jacob."

"Fine..."

Bella began eating, waiting for a few stories of her life. Anything so she could begin living like she had before.

"You took care of your dad very well. He was very happy with you there, you cooked for him every night. You were happy too."

There was a flash of resentment that blinded Jasper's face. She opened her mouth to ask if he was alright but Jacob continued on speaking and she turned to him instead.

"We had motorcycles. You came to my house with these two junkers in the back of the truck and asked me to fix them up."

"I fixed up a bike," she asked incredulously.

"Okay, I fixed it up and you kept me company. You had the checkbook and I had the knowledge."

She nodded. That sounded like her. The bikes, however, did not. "My dad made me promise not to ever get on a bike."

"You see, there was -"

"Enough," Jasper cracked loudly. "That's enough."

She eyed them curiously, her cheeks flaming in a blush she didn't understand. They both kept their heads down, and she was only able to tell that they were sad. "What happened to me that was so terrible?"

"You were in an accident -"

"No, Jake. What aren't you two telling me?"

Jasper clawed at his hair, almost pulling it from the roots. "Please, eat. You'll find out everything soon. I promise you."

"You should eat too," Jacob told him harshly. "You look... Pale." He smirked wickedly, like there was an inside joke she was missing out on.

She began eating. As curious as she was to know what was going on, what had happened to her, she would wait. There was the possibility that she would get her memory back one day. Perhaps she didn't want to know what those two years held...

***

Curiosity and contemplation swam over him as he watched her eat. She was slow, eating her disgusting-smelling soup in small doses. Her heated face was almost too much to bear. It stabbed at his throat like a white hot poker. He was nearly growling, his nails digging into his skull. It took every single bit of self-control he gained over the years to stay where he was at. He kept the imagination of her blood away, begged it to be gone so he could think straight. It wasn't easy, not in the small space they were in. It was torturing.

"I think will eat," he hissed out. He didn't wait for their answers, pushed back their confusion and stepped out into the hallway. He was only out there for a moment, then Jacob came out holding a black jacket.

"It's sunny today," he said throwing it at him. "My keys are in the pocket."

"Thanks," he responded to the closing door, knowing that he heard him.

He pulled it on, flipping up the hood. He buried his hands into the pockets and walked outside, careful to keep his head low. He hated the idea of using the slow and rusty Rabbit, but there was no way he could use the bike he bought, not while attempting to keep himself from sparkling like ethereal diamond.

Bella lost her memory but she didn't lose who she was. Jasper didn't expect that, but the way she looked into his eyes unflinching, the way no human could do, he knew she would take it well. It had nothing to do with Edward, she truly was brave, or truly that stupid. In his opinion, she was truly that amazing.