Free
"Commander McCloud's arwing signals have vanished",ROB64 said .
"What,are you serious?",Slippy said, jumping from his seat .
"Not possible,the only way that could happen is if-",Peppy started but was cut off .
"If his ship was destroyed! ROB64,where was the last place you detected the signal?!",Slippy said .
"Somewhere on Papetoon,city Midra .Country ,Keltos .Continent,Vhanen ",ROB64 said .
"Before we jump to conclusions,what are his vitals like?",Peppy asked .
"No way of knowing sir .Communication channels have been cut off,indicating that it has been destroyed .Likely intentional ,as the device would have to be thoroughly smashed to be rendered useless",ROBB64 said .
"I need a list of all known pilots on Papetoon,ROB64 .It could've been a dog fight gone bad,but something tells me Fox ain't down for the count yet",Peppy said .
"How do you know?! You can't just assume he's okay and sit there and wait and-"
"Set a course for Papetoon",Peppy said .Through teary eye,Slippy smiled a bit .
"Setting course .Trip will take approximately a week in normal speed .Four days in hyper speed",ROB64 said .
"Normal speed,we don't have gas money",Peppy said .
"Affirmative .Co-ordinates plotted,setting course",ROB64 said .
"Good .Slippy,come on down here",Peppy said,from his seat .Slippy left his spot on the bridge,came down to Peppy's seat .
"Don't you go cryin' yet,I know Fox is fine .He's lost,but he's plenty alive,trust me on this one * ",Peppy said .Slippy looked up at Peppy,uncertain .
"How do you know ?",Slippy asked .
"I trust my instincts",Peppy said,placing a firm grip on Slippy's shoulder .
"Never the less though,we are going to find him and get in contact with Falco .That,and I need to go see my girl ,Lucy .She's all grown up and always avoids me,but hell,I'm gonna spring in on her anyway",he said,smiling .
"She's not gonna like that",Slippy said,a smirk on his face .
"Bah! Who cares? She's gonna have to deal with it .Now come on to the kitchen and let's get a drink .Fox left his cup * (1) so we know he's comin' back",Peppy said .
"Alright,that makes me feel better I guess",Slippy said .
After Peppy and Slippy had their tea,Slippy found himself wondering into Fox's room as Peppy napped .
For weeks and weeks,Fox would stay in his room ,doors locked and music blasting,shutting out the world .Slippy wondered if it was something he did,but Fox reassured him other wise .
Often times,Slippy didn't believe him .
Even if it was the one thing Fox told him NOT to do,the one thing that Fox absolutely forbid anyone from doing,Slippy went into his room .
After that incident the day before,Wolf had put Fox in the bathroom closet as punishment,no food an no water .His wrists were bound,collar on his neck and leash wrapped around the doorknob ,worse,because the place was only large enough for him to stand up straight with no room to maneuver about .To add to that,he was standing on a case of empty beer bottles,spaced apart making his balance completely off,broken glass within the spaces .Not only only,but it elevated him high enough that his head touch the shelf and crushing his ears .And to add insult to injury,Wolf would occasionally slam on the door,startling Fox,making him nearly step in the glass .
Fox knew he was being punished,but he never expected this .
He told Fox he could come out if he begged for forgiveness,and Fox wasn't quite ready to stoop that low .Wolf though,decided to throw a chair in front of the door,for the soul purpose of taunting the other man .But it seemed that after a while,Wolf was in his own world,having forgotten Fox and he didn't like it .
"Knock ,knock",Wolf said through the door .Fox was shocked at how elated he was to have hear Wolf's voice .
"What?",Fox said .He heard the chair scrape the floor before it was picked up and moved,dropped somewhere nearby .
The door swung open and Wolf was leaning in the doorway with a smirk on his face .Fox glared .
"Are you ready to beg?"Wolf said .
No answer .
"Fine,well I'm going to shower .You be a good pup and stay right there . . .oh wait,you don't have a choice,do you?",Wolf said .He let his coat hang from his shoulder a moment,before letting it slide down to reveal a form fitting black tank top .
Again,Fox said nothing,just looked at Wolf with pleading eyes .Wolf sighed,reached out and touched his cheek,looking at him .
"All you have to do is beg my forgiveness and I'll let you go .That's all",he said,petting him lovingly .Fox ducked his head away from Wolf,looking depressed .
Wold frowned,and took off his shirt .He tossed it casually over his shoulder .Fox could see his pants were riding so low,it obvious Wolf was wearing no underwear .
Fox tried to avert his gaze but Wolf caught him .
"So you're sure about this?",Wolf said .Fox's gaze traveled again but he quickly stopped himself .
Again,no answer .
"Fine,suit yourself",Wolf said .
zip .
Wolf's pants were unzipped now and riding off his hips .As he turned around,the pants started to drop and Wolf caught them .Fox got a nice look at part of Wolf's ass before he kicked the door shut and locked it .
As bad as it was,Wolf enjoyed having Fox's eyes roaming his body . As much hated to admit it,it turned him on and it was amusing to see him crack .He didn't intend to leave Fox in the closet long, just wanted to make sure what happened a day ago,never happens again .It was actually luck that Wolf found the arwing that first night .What prompted him to tamper with it was the fact that Wolf was unsure if he could best Falco in an air battle with the eye situation (he lost to Fox after all) .Sure ,in a gunfight or using weapons,Wolf would curb stomp his ass (he's been practicing) and he was pretty sure he could punch his lights out .But he heard from Leon that if pressed,Falco would use his beak and Wolf wanted to keep his other eye .That and plus he had a soft spot for Peppy and he really didn't want to mess that up
Wolf turned on the shower,grabbed his shampoo and rag and started lathering up and pushed tried to clear his mind .It mostly worked . . .except Fox,
The thoughts of him wouldn't leave instead they lingered,festered grew .Every touch he ever gave Fox and vice versa now had new meaning . Wolf was starting to get aroused,thinking about it .As he sat the rag down,one of his hands rubbing his chest,his nipples .He allowed the shampoo to rinse from his hands before traveling lower .He started thinking about the more than few times he's seen Fox naked,his hands working over his firm body .As he leaned against the shower wall,stroking himself .With his foot up on the ledge,he picked up his pace,letting everything slip away,only thought being the beautiful creature that decided to stay with him,and the feeling of what it would be like to have him work that mouth of his on Wolf .
Fox was angry,aggravated and uncomfortable .He started to wonder if maybe he should just ask Wolf to let him out,he knows Wolf would listen,Wolf was good to him like that .But Fox still had a stubborn streak,one he wish he didn't have now .
Then he wouldn't be trying to balance on fallen bottles and avoid broken glass with his hands bound and no moving space .
Suddenly Fox's ears perked up at the sound of a muffled moan .Fox paused for a moment,wondering if he was hallucinating .It came again and Fox knew he wasn't .
It was Wolf .
He was pleasuring himself .
The very thought,Fox felt a blush creep to his cheeks .
Fox didn't fight it any more,he knew he wanted Wolf,wanted him since he set eyes on him in Hell's Den .And in reality,that's what intensified his desire to kill him,a desire that was now completely gone .
Fox could never hurt Wolf and Wolf could never hurt Fox .This here,this was discipline,Fox knew that .If Fox would only be good,Wolf would go back to coddling him which he wanted,needed more than anything .
Fox could see nothing but the dim door ,but he heard .He heard well despite the slight muffle through the closet .
The sound of Wolf's voice made Fox crazy .He heard a particularly loud grunt, a sigh .
Fox felt it between his legs .
For ,each time he heard Wolf,Fox felt himself getting more aroused . It was driving Fox over the edge,but he ignored it ,or at least tried .Having a hard on was not helping his situation,making him even more likely to stumble .
Wolf thrust into his hand now,Fox noticed him getting louder,the soft sound of slick hands over flesh barely audible over the shower,but to Fox with his superb hearing,it was loud as ever .Fox's fingers ghosted over his erection through his pants .
'When was the last time I even got any?',Fox thought .The fact he couldn't remember when and who . . . .
Falco .
But Fox really didn't wanna think about that .
Suddenly,one of the bottles slipped and Fox's foot touched glass .He seethed in pain and leaned against the wall,standing on just one foot .He knew he should've called Wolf .
He balanced himself carefully on the bottles finding a comfortable stance but it was proving difficult wit a piece of glass in his foot and nowhere to move .
Wolf finally came in his hand,the fantasy of Fox calling him .
That was it,nothing but a fantasy .
.It was when he heard the loud thump sound and a cry of pain did he start to come to his senses .
Wolf finished cleaning up ,shut off the shower and reached for the towel sitting on the bar on the wall .
When Wolf opened the door,Fox was trying to stand up,on the bottles with one bleeding foot in the glass .
"I'm sorry",Fox said,he finally gave in .
"I hope you don't take it personally ,pup .It's just that I couldn't have you running off again .You won't get far like this,but while your feet are healing,I can heal you",Wolf said calmly as he bandaged Fox's right foot .He reached up and scratched his ears,Fox leaned into his touch .
"Okay",he said .
"One more game?",Fox said ,his tail wagging and hitting the bed .Wolf chuckled and collected the cards from the deck .
"C'mon Pup,we've been at this forever ",Wolf said . Fox frowned as he watched the other man rise from his seat .He gripped Wolf by his arm .
"Where are you going?",Fox asked .
It had been several days since Fox's little insurrection,but Fox still felt guilty about it .Wolf had forgiven him easily,said 'you weren't in your right frame of mind',which was true .Over this time,Wolf still gave Fox his 'medicine' but was slowly decreasing the dosage in an attempt to ween him off the stuff .While it wasn't as harsh as going cold turkey,Wolf could see the effects visible on Fox .His beautiful fur wasn't as bright,his eyes were duller,he lost a small amount of weight and his tail tended to flop about restlessly sometimes .Wolf knew the hell Fox was going through from personal experience,but it was worth it .
He just hoped Fox thought so too .
For the most part,Wolf's presence had gotten rid of many of Fox's night terrors,and killed any odd feelings of paranoia hat occasionally crept up .It was when Wolf was gone that he felt the anxiety and other things .At this point,just thinking of Wolf was enough to at least calm him but it wasn't enough .
Wolf though,was affected by this too .As much as he hated to admit it,Fox calmed his nerves and the dreams weren't nearly as bad when he slept in a chair of pillows or a floor beside Fox's bed .
He didn't trust himself to share a bed with the other man .
He of course made sure he was up before Fox was .But at this point,he started to realize that whenever he left Fox to his own devices,he was getting worried about him more and more,which is why he kept him leashed .Especially since he was showing more symptoms of withdrawal due to the decreased dosages he gave Fox .
Wolf sighed,took one of Fox's cuffed hands and squeezed it .
"I'm going to come back now,calm down .I'm not leaving you ",Wolf said gently .Fox smiled a nervous smile,clutched Wolf's hand tighter than he should've .
"Alright,just don't take too long",Fox said .
True to his word,Wolf was back very quickly ,only gone for minutes .He had his hand in his pocket and a book tucked under his arm,which caught Fox's interest .Wolf pulled out a fresh pack of 3 x5 cards and sat them on the table along with a black permanent marker .After that,Wolf went to the makeshift kitchen and brought back some sliced oranges on a plate .He watched Fox's reaction and slid the plate to him .
"So how are you feeling?",Wolf asked .Fox was sucking on an orange ,Wolf noted his fur shedding .
"I'm okay,a little nauseous,but I'm okay",he said .
"Well enough to speak?",Wolf asked .Fox frowned .
"Depends on the topic",Fox said .
"Fine,so tell me about your friends",Wolf said .
Fox's ears pressed against his skull for a moment before they popped up again .
"Well,Slippy's my best buddy .We've been friends since we were toddlers .It was me,Slippy and Bill Gray",Fox said .
"What happened to Bill?",Wolf said .Fox frowned .
"His family .He's from a military family ,his dad's high rank .Bill couldn't just leave like I did .Though I'll be honest,I was upset about it for a long time .Don't see him much",Fox said .
"What about Falco?",Wolf asked .Fox stopped in his tracks .
This was going to be good .
Fox sat up with a sour look and dropped the orange slice .He sighed .
"Falco and I are . . .close",Fox said .
"How close? Are you lovers?",Wolf asked,sounding harsher than he meant to .
'I wish . . .'Fox thought .
"No .Just our friendship's different,if that's what you wanna call it .Sometimes,I don't know which one of us is really in charge becaus he does what the fuck he wants",Fox said .
"And that's a bad thing?",Wolf said .
"I . . .I'm trying to maintain a certain image for Star Fox .I mean,we aren't common crooks,we're-"
"Heroes?",Wolf said .
"Suppose to be .I don't feel very heroic .I feel like . . .I feel like if my last name wasn't McCloud,my life would be different .I feel like I would've become like Falco",Fox said .
"And what's Falco like?",Wolf asked .
"I met Falco . . .he was a stranger in the streets .He actually had me at gun point and was gonna rob me .I took him by surprise ,used some of my academy training and tackled him down,took his gun .Told him that he was a nobody,and he didn't believe me .I said he could be somebody,he didn't believ me .
He use to watch the flight training simulations,he wanted to fly ,but he couldn't afford it,his drug money mostly want to some sleaze named Kovak and the stuff him and his gang made was literally to pay the rent .So I cut him a deal .I said that my friends and I would help him pay his way,if he'd watch our backs .We were a bunch of geeks and they picked on us and I was damn sure one of the flight instructors, Sergeant Ackles hated me ",Fox said .
Wolf knew all about Sergeant Ackles ,but chose not to speak on it .
"What about Peppy?",Wolf said .Fox stayed quiet until he finished a piece of orange .He shifted in his seat .
"Peppy was like a father figure,you know nag you an all about life .Didn't pay him no mind then .He told me Falco was trouble,we didn't listen .Had a lot of fun and I learned the truth about the world while swingin' in clubs",Fox said .
"And what's that?",Wolf said .
"There's two things everybody want .Happiness,oblivion .Most people can't tell the difference",Fox said .
"Wisest thing I heard you say since I met you",Wolf said .Fox chuckled .
"I think I'd be wiser if I wasn't so impulsive,but what the hell,it's my personality",Fox said .
"And you won't change?",Wolf said .
"I don't know .As Peppy said,I haven't got 'the backhand of life' yet .Said it happens to everybody",Fox said .
"He's right .I had mine already",Wolf said .
"Really? What happened to you?",Fox said .
"You mean between almost overdosing on drugs,getting coerced into sex against my will multiple times,losing my eye and almost dying how many times? Stopped counting after three .I'm a paranoid fuck,if you haven't already noticed",Wolf said .
"Yeah,you seem to have a contingency plan for everything",Fox mused .
"I have to",Wolf said,making Fox look up .
"Yeah,I guess . . .",Fox said .
"So,where do we go from here?",Wolf asked .
"What do you mean?",Fox said .
"What are you living for? Do you have something you want to achieve,or are you just in oblivion?",Wolf asked .
"Yeah,I had something I wanted to achieve,but it wasn't worth it .I killed Andross,it didn't do shit to improve my life,hell it gave me nightmares .If I could go back,I would've never fought in the war,I would've took my ass to the Terminus systems .Some alien babe I met named Sam said she'd take me with her but like an ass,I didn't listen",Fox said .
"Why?",Wolf asked .
"I was scared to be on my own .I knew they weren't leaving,so I stayed .One of my most regretted decisions .Had mercenary work lined up over there too . . .I never wanted any of this you know,I never wanted it",Fox said .
"The military only takes people who want it",Wolf said .
"Don't you know about the charade?",Fox said with a chuckle .
"What?",Wolf said .
"I got dishonorable discharge,said I wasn't built for it because I got fuckin' mental problems,I break under pressure too easily .They don't know the fucking meaning of pressure",Fox ground out .
Now Wolf was interested .
"Really? The Hero of Lylat got a dishonorable discharge .What the fuck did you do?",Wolf asked .
"I cracked",he said looking Wolf in the eye .For a moment,Wolf could see madness behind those green eyes,see something dark .
He could see someone begging for help .
"So,tell me how long you've been using",Wolf said .Fox stopped sucking on his orange,eyes down .
"It's okay,I already said I won't judge you .I use to be strung out myself a few times .why the hell you think I was so skinny and always irritable looking when you were kicking my ass during the Lylat Wars?",Wolf said .
"I thought you were an evil brat mad at the world cause you lost your eye really",Fox said .Wolf chuckled,Fox smirked .
"I wasn't mad at the world,but at who did it",Wolf said .Fox frowned .
"Who did this to you?",Fox asked,concerned .
"Someone close to me . . .but I paid him back,made him pay with his life,but it was accident .It hurt more than losing the eye:,Wolf said .
"I'm sorry . ."
"Don't be .After that,I stopped using for just the physical pain and did it for the emotional too .Then it go so bad I needed it to stay normal .I'm a recovering addict,like you,Fox .And I'm worse because the war wasn't the first time .I'd done this before,back when I was young and desperate and on the run from crooked military officers an' shit",Wolf said .
"I'm not an addict",Fox said .Wolf sighed and rolled his eye .
"Actually,you are and there's nothing wrong with that,you're still human,you're just sick",Wolf said .
"No I'm not"!,Fox shouted angrily jumping from his seat and knocking over the table .The plate of oranges crashed to the floor,breaking and spilling what was left of the fruit .Wolf looked at him impassive .
"You're still in denial .Have it your way then .I'll stop giving you your drugs and we'll see how you feel",Wolf said .
"I'm fine",Fox said weakly .Wolf got up from his seat walked to Fox until he was inches away,looked into his eyes .
"I don't beleive you,junkie",he said .Fox violently shoved Wolf making him stumble back and retreated to the bathroom .
Wolf sighed and left out .
"So,why not kill him now?",Leon asked,playing with the knife in his hand .He and Wolf were in an old ,abandoned house ,staring down a black fox who was badly bruised and beaten .
"Need him alive for somethin' important",Wolf said .
"He's a common drug dealer,what purpose does he serve?",Leon asked .
"A higher purpose .He's part of a plan of mine .You can do with you want to the guy,break his mind ,or whatever',he said .The fox panicked,trying to pull at his restraints .Wolf walked up to him and kicked him in the chest,making him go down with the chair .He looked at the main enraged .
"Control yourself",Leon warned .Wolf closed his eyes,took deep breathes,calmed himself .
"It was therapy",Wolf said as he came back to Leon .
"Here",he said,placing something in Leon's jacket pocket .He watched the terrified animal on the floor ,slowly pacing in his direction .He waited until Wolf was gone,before he checked to see what it was .
A silver ring,patterns on it .
From James,with love .
Leon pocketed the ring again and kneeled before the black fox .
"We are going to have so much fun together",he said softly,petting his fur .
The fox began to cry .
A surge of anger ran through Fox as he tore at the collar .He was,jerking the strap,even chewing on it ,but it was no use .He sighed,and got up and dragged himself to the bathroom .Wolf at least had the decency to keep it long enough for him to maneuver around .But it was only fair after the closet situation .
Fox was in the mirror now,looking at his reflection .He didn't look like an addict . . . .at least not from first glance .He hadn't lost too much weight,maybe five pounds or so .His eyes were admittedly a little bloodshot,bags under them .
He blamed it on lack of sleep from his nightmares .
Fox still had some muscle tone,but he was losing it,his ribs weren't showing but he could feel them .
'I'm not an addict,I can't be',he thought .
What would everyone else say? How could he show himself in front of his friends?
What if Wolf keeps me here forever?
No,no,it wasn't plausible .Wolf was a fighter pilot like him ,a space traveler .Wolf was gonna leave eventually ,and then . . .
Fox wasn't sure if he wanted to leave now, well,he did .
Just that he wasn't sure if he could leave Wolf .
'Stockholm Syndrome,that's what it is'
No it's not,it's more than that
And as far as he concerned,he couldn't be an addict because it he had only been taking his medicine in large doses for like a month because the regular dose didn't get it .Fox was sure it would take more than a month to become an out right junkie and he didn't appreciate Wolf calling him one .
Except that his body pains had been coming back .
"It's only been hours! Why is this happening again?",Fox grumbled .
He was shaking .
"Damnit!",he cursed .He slammed the sink and paced the floor .
Restlessness .
He had the urge to throw something but there was nothing in here but soap,and shampoo and rags and . . .
The cabinet .
'Maybe there's some medicine in here',Fox thought hopefully .His tail wagging Fox opened the cabinet a few pill bottles .Happily,he grabbed them,looked at the labels .
'Vitamin B ,Vitanmin C . . .these are all vitamins!'
Fox shoved the bottles away,went for the last two .
Vitamins again .
"Damnit!",Fox growled .He shifted desperately through the bottles,rechecked them .
They were all still vitamins .
Fox whined and threw a bottle .His breath hitched he dragged himself to his feet,careful of the sligghtly pained cuts .He glanced up with bleary eyes at the cabinet .
There was a note there .
'The pills in this cabinet,Vitamins,are to -"
Fox snatched the note and tore it with his teeth .
"Stop fucking with me!",he screamed .Fox stormed out of the bathroom .
He started searching the room,drawers ,dressers,cabinets .He shoved boxes away,looked under the bed where he kept his stuff .He even tore through the closets .
Nothing .
He was shaking now,his body pains growing worse,his stomach turned .Fox cried silently,leaning against the wall .Cold sweats,shakes,all coming back now .
Fox finally couldn't take it anymore and rushed to the bathroom .
When Wolf came back upstairs ,he stared in shock at the absolute mess that was the room .Clothes,video games,and everything else was strewn about,and the full body mirror was shattered,drops of blood on the floor .
'He did it with his bare hands',Wolf noted .
Fox though ,was nowhere in sight,but the leash led to the bathroom .
When Wolf came in,he nearly tripped over all the pill bottles and water on the floor .Wolf saw Fox's feet and an arm dangling out of the tub .A piece of glass slipped from his fingers .
Drops of blood seeped through his wrist ,to the floor .
"Shit!",Wolf cursed and went over to the tub,only to see Fox's face under the water .He immediately hauled Fox out of the water,not caring that it splashed on the floor,got all over him .Fox started fighting him,trying to squirm away until they both hit the floor .
Wolf sat Fox up against the tub .There were cuts running up his arms and on his neck .He looked back at Wolf,breathing hard stains of red in his fur .Panicking,Wolf checked his wounds,ran to the closet for medical supplies .After cleaning his cuts,Wolf bandaged them up .Lucky for them,they were only shallow cuts .Fox though was still trembling,his eyes teary .
"I admit it . . .I'm addicted,I am . . .I'm really a junkie .So . . .so just give it to me .Give me another hit . . .I'll do anything you ask",Fox said .He was sitting with his knees up,arms wrapped around his legs .
"I just don't wanna go through this,I don't wanna do this anymore",Fox said .
"You won't have to anymore,I promise",Wolf said .He pulled Fox close and he sobbed into Wolf's chest .Wolf didn't care,let him do it,let him have his moment .
Wolf was holding bottle of pills in his hand .From where he was Fox saw the label .
THIS IS BLISS
Showed across in bold letters .Fox blinked startled .
It was gone .
"This is gonna be your last dose Fox .I'm going to get you clean,fix you ,like I promised .No more games,this is real",Wolf said holding the bottle .
"You see this,this medicine? It's your poison .Look what it's done to you .I saw your test scores,I fought you in the sky,you're better than this .I'm giving you a chance to fix yourself,fix your life .After this,you can be whatever you want to be",Wolf said .
"I'm going to give you absolution,do you know what that means?",Wolf asked .
The feeble animal crouched on the floor in bandages and green cargo pants looked up at Wolf ,eyes large .
"Yes",he choked out,shaking .
"Do you want it?",Wolf asked .
"I wan to be free",Fox said .Wolf kneeled down before Fox,pet the fur on his shoulder a bit before dumping some pills into his hands .Fox nearly cried as he took them and gulped down the bottle of water Wolf gave him .
Everything seemed surreal after that,at least to Fox it did .He must've taken a damn heavy dosage because everything was spinning .
THIS IS BLISS
Fox was blindfolded,lead up to the roof,where he watched Wolf hurling bottles over the roof tops .After that was done,Wolf came back to him with the blindfold .Fox briefly looked back at the door,saw the side turned eight spray painted white against dirty gray and scratches .
Infinity .
"Wolf?",Fox said .
"Yeah,what is it Pup?",he asked .
"Thank you",he said .Before Wolf could stop him,Fox clutched Wolf's shirt with his bound hands and kissed him .
*1) the glass mugs from the chapter 'lifting spirits' in 'the breaking game'
