Yup. I did it. Two chapters in a week and I wrote this chapter just for Caskett. I hope you guys enjoy this one :D
I disown the song. It's "Hesitate" by Steve Moakler :)
Chapter 7
But if only Kate could fall asleep as quickly as she bragged about her tiredness. She tossed and turned for half an hour, and then she almost fell asleep in one position, but her arm went numb and she had to shift. She scowled a couple of times and sat up even more times. Finally, she wrapped herself up in the comforter and decided that the warmth would help her sleep. And she was about to fall asleep until she heard her door open softly. She wanted to swear at whoever it was.
"Kate? Are you still awake?" a whisper came through the stillness of the night.
She sighed. "Unfortunately..."
She heard the soft pitter-patter of feet and then he was right in front of her, the right side of the bed. "Come with me. I have to show you something."
"Leave me alone, Castle. Are you insane? It's almost one in the morning. Go to sleep," Kate mumbled. She was getting irritated now since she just needed five more minutes and she would've fallen asleep.
"I have to show you something first. Please? Just for a little," he begged softly, but didn't get anywhere near her as if to grab her hand of something so she wouldn't feel violated in any way.
Kate knew she'd get nowhere with him if she kept telling him no. She decided to go see what she wanted to show her, kick him hard, then going back to bed. "All right. But no more than a minute."
He grinned. "Just put on your bathrobe," he said, and tiptoed out.
She sighed again, wondering why he insisted on this in the middle of the night. Olivia was probably asleep by now and Lanie definitely was because she left the precinct earlier than anyone else. Kate put on her baby pink bathrobe and patted down her hair so she wouldn't look like a freak. Then, she slowly went down the stairs, almost afraid of what would be waiting for her at the bottom.
The dining room table was lit up. Well, not on fire, but there was a dim light in that part of the dining room. There was a candle in between two black China plates that had scarlet flowers painted on them. A red rose with black lace ribbon was tied to the stem and was lying on one of the plates. Just then, Castle appeared with a bottle of wine in his hand and he gave her an innocent but kind smile.
"Merlot is fine with you, right? I mean, it's not expensive or anything because it's not a real date, but it tastes fresh..."
Kate frowned and opened her mouth as if to speak, but no sound came from her. For the second time ever (the first was when Lanie told her she found evidence that pointed her in the direction of Kate's mom's killer) she was speechless, but she was also confused. "Castle...what is this?" she asked, motioning towards the things on the table.
He ignored this question. Instead, he put the bottle on the table and went towards her, then took her hand in a very gentlemanlike way, and led her to her seat. Then, he pulled out her seat and told her to sit. Kate, not knowing how to argue, did as he said. She was flushed with embarrassment as soon as she realized what was going on. She stood him up with her promise, so he decided to "non-date" her right at home.
"Castle, this is..." she didn't know how to finish. She was too appalled to say anything really.
"I know. I shouldn't have done it, but...I wanted to surprise you." Castle gave her another soft smile and then disappeared into the kitchen, letting her to ponder on his words.
Kate was overwhelmed. She couldn't describe what she was feeling at that moment. Half of her wanted to yell at him for waking her up; she wanted to throw that rose at him that was in front of her. But then, her other half, her emotional half, wanted to cry and to hug him for thinking about her. She was touched by the fact that he went through all this trouble, setting up for probably an hour or so, just to please and surprise her.
"Because this was just supposed to be a casual and friendly dinner, I made burgers and fries. Making the shakes would've woken up everyone else so I decided not to make any. I owe you one, remind me," he said, coming back into the room with a platter of burgers, fries, and different toppings and all kinds of dips. Then, he saw her frown and he set the platter down, frowning too. "You hate it. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have made plans for you when you didn't even want to have dinner with me. I guess I didn't learn my lesson about intrusion-"
"Castle, stop," Beckett finally spoke up, shaking her head. She allowed a small smile to glow upon her lips. "I don't hate it. I'm just really shocked that you would do this for me. It's really nice. I honestly appreciate that you thought of surprising me. Not many people would do this. Especially not at one in the morning."
Castle then looked proud of himself at her words and gloated a little. "Well, you know...Only the most highly respected men would ever do such a thing for a lady, and more often if she's a lady cop."
Kate gave him a sarcastic smile with narrowed eyes. Changing the subject, she glanced at her plate. "The plates are beautiful. And the rose...You're really sweet, Castle, sometimes."
"Only sometimes? I would think myself that all the time. You heard Olivia. I'm charming."
"And obnoxious, self-centered-"
"Just shut up and stuff your pretty mouth with a burger," he interrupted her, shaking his head.
Raising her eyebrows, she reached for one. "Gladly." She was impressed to see that he didn't touch anything until she took a bite out of it. Why does he have to be such a gentleman sometimes and a child the other times? I can't believe I'm saying this, but it's attractive.
Castle then took a burger and indeed stuffed his mouth. He hadn't eaten in over seven hours just to save his stomach for the dinner he would have with her. He knew he'd convince her somehow, and he did. For once, he felt truly proud of himself for thinking this up, even if it could've cost him his hide.
"Wine?" he inquired, picking up the bottle, waiting for her nod. When she did nod, he popped the bottle open and poured half a glass to each of them, her first. "So...any regrets until now?"
Kate took a sip of her wine, and then replied. "Not yet. But we haven't even finished the Merlot yet; after we finish, we can discuss it then."
"Ooh, you're turning dirty, Detective, aren't you," Castle remarked, raising an eyebrow.
"Once in my life won't kill me. Besides, I meant that I can discuss it. I can outdrink you any day, and I would if you had more wine," Kate said, her voice getting lower and more raspy.
His jaw managed to slowly drop with every word she said. "I'll go get the crate," he said with a serious look, indeed looking prepared to take off and go for the crate of wine he had stashed.
"That's ok, Castle. I wasn't exactly planning on having any alcohol in my system this case. I guess you're an exception." She sipped from her glass again, then took another bite of her burger. Whatever he made it with, it tasted heavenly.
"Aw, I feel special now!" He grinned playfully and reached for another cheeseburger as realization hit him. "Wait. I asked for any regrets, and you responded with "discussing". You would regret us-"
She didn't feel comfortable talking about the two of them. If there ever is a chance at a couple happening, she wasn't ready to talk about it yet. "Don't even finish that sentence. If only you didn't have such a dirty mind, I could speak to you like a human."
"And that's coming from the person who exclaimed, 'Shut the front door!'"
Kate gasped. "You know I did not mean that in a dirty way! I don't even know what could be dirty about it!"
"Well, when you're in bed-"
"I do not need you explaining to me what sex is, thank you very much." She sighed. "Look, for some reason, we can't have a normal conversation without arguing. I almost punched you earlier this morning. Like I said, I wanted us to start over. This is definitely not a good beginning for an ending."
He stopped eating and stared at her intently. He knew she was being completely honest but the look in her eyes. "Who says this has to be an ending, Kate? It could be the beginning of a beginning. We could start over and pretend none of this happened."
"Too many things happened between us to start over from that way back," Kate told him.
"All right, then, how about start from where we left off? That we make a great team and that you learned a lot from me..." his voice trailed dramatically, but he was withholding a laugh.
"Oh, you're so funny, Castle," Kate said sarcastically as she finished off her burger and about two dozen fries.
"Why don't you ever call me Rick? Or even Richard would do. But it's always 'Castle'. Why?" he asked, suddenly curious.
"Well..." she began, pouring herself another glass of wine. "I don't really call anyone at the precinct by their first name, except Lanie. Haven't you noticed?"
"Well, yeah, but I'm not a detective. I don't mind you calling me Castle, but it would be nice not to forget my first name." Castle too was finished with his food and now just drinking from his wine glass. He never paid attention to how she'd call him but now it bothered him. "And it's not only at the precinct that you call me that, it's everywhere; haven't you noticed?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't think you'd be offended-"
"Oh, no, I'm not offended. I was just curious. And I was informing you for the future. I mean, you let me call you Kate, so I thought I should let you call me Rick," Castle told her, looking right into her eyes.
"Let's clarify that, shall we? I never let you call me Kate. You came up with that one on your own. I'm only letting you get away-" She paused for a little when those words went straight to her heart. She did let him get away a couple of months ago, "with calling me that."
"Aw, you do care about me. Our Katie is growing up," he teased.
And she gave him a murderous glare. "But you are not getting away with calling me that."
Castle pretended to pout. "Oh, all right. But then you cannot call me Ricky."
She smiled teasingly. "I like how that sounds, especially if I could relate it to Ricky Castle."
He scowled and she then laughed at the look on his face. His lips twisted into a smile too and laughed along with her. After the wine was finished, he decided to proceed unto what else he had planned for her. A dance. He'd always wanted to dance with her again. He liked that feel of securing her in his arms. This time, he just wasn't sure if he would ever let her go. But before he turned the music on, he thought it was time to give her what he found and he knew she'd like it. Sticking his hand in his pocket, he began, "I found this earlier today. I was going to give it to you on out non-date at some fast food place, but I guess here's ok too."
Kate's eyes widened with delight as soon as she saw her father's watch dangling from his fingers. She reached over across the table and grabbed it, then fastened it to her wrist. "Thank you, Castle," was all she could get herself to say, but at least it was with a smile.
"You done?" He motioned toward her plate.
"Yeah. Why? You want to be a gentleman and wash the dishes?" Kate teased him. She knew for sure she wasn't drunk, so why was she acting so flirty and loose? Was he getting to her? Was she letting him tear down all of the walls that she had built and rebuilt so many times? She was just going to get hurt. This was Richard Castle, famous player, in front of her!
"No...That's what the dish washer is for," he said slowly, licking his lips, hoping she wouldn't get mad at his next idea. He stood up and went around to her side. "How long, Beckett, has it been since you last danced?"
She raised and eyebrow and gave him a "seriously?" look. Well, that's what she wanted him to believe. But the truth was, she wanted to dance with him again. "Few months. Probably more. What's your playlist?" There was no harm in asking.
Castle grinned and took her into the living room where he setup his iPod. "Surprise." He didn't think dancing in bathrobes would be appropriate, so he took off his and offered to take hers off too. So now, they were both in their casual clothes pajamas, except, she looked much more attractive than he probably did. Then, he remembered her foot. "How's your ankle?"
"It's healing. But I could dance if you're careful," Kate replied, moving her toes a bit to be sure her foot wouldn't begin to ache during the dance.
"Then you won't mind slow-dancing."
Her heart fluttered at his words. If he was going to make a move in any way, the setting was perfect. It wasn't completely pitch-dark because there was the dim light from the other room casting into this, but she was glad he couldn't see her blush. When the music started, she took a deep breath as he took her hand and rested his other one as her waist.
"The human heart is a scary part in fact. Cause I could break you and could break me back..."
Of all the songs, he had to choose this one, didn't he. He torturing me here and I still don't know what he wants, Kate thought to herself, feeling her heart slowly shattering. The only person who could fix it was the one person she couldn't allow herself to fall for.
"Though my heart says 'Just forget it. You'll get hurt and you'll regret it.' Ask me now, and I won't hesitate,"the lyrics of the song went and both Castle and Kate related to it, but neither knew that the other one was thinking of him and her. "So many cards that never leave the deck. There comes a time when you have to place your bet. And I've never been a gambling man and if you want to see my hand, ask me now and I won't hesitate."
She couldn't take any more of the song. Tears had already filled her eyes and she was stiff now and couldn't continue the slow-dance. "Castle, please stop it," regarding the song. But instead of doing as she told him to do, he held her closer and breathed in her cherry-scented skin and hair.
"Cause I'm fearful of heights but you take me higher. What came with you was a view to admire. I've always been the kind to contemplate, but you like the kind that don't hesitate."
Castle's heart was breaking for her. She was afraid to let him into her heart. He knew her too well and he hated it when she closed up to him. Especially when it was necessary for her part to be done also. She was in his arms now; he held all the cards and he was in control of what would happen next between them. He didn't know if he loved her, but he was certain he liked her a lot. He had feelings with her, which he never felt before for any other woman except for his first real serious relationship. There was just something about her that he couldn't stand. Maybe her stubbornness? Or was it her ability to make him fall for her?
"So excuse me while I fall for you. Excuse me while I fall for you...Thought about it long and hard today. I realized I'm standing in our way. Usually my judgment's better, but with your blue eyes, hey whatever. Ask me now and I won't hesitate. Ask me now...and I won't...hesitate..."
He spun her once and as she faced him again, he spotted those tears in her eyes. He knew her teeth were gritted so the tears wouldn't fall. He saw her frightened face. Touching her cheek with a curled finger, he whispered, "Excuse me while I fall for you, Kate."
Kate was almost trembling at his tender touch. She was afraid that he was going to kiss her and that she wouldn't be able to respond. She was stuck at his words and at his eyes. They were so kind and gentle and she saw care in them. Were those eyes deceiving eyes that would lust her without love and then leave her alone when done with her? Would Castle ever do that to her?
"Why are you doing this, Castle?" she whispered, looking from one eye to another.
Instead of responding, he took her hand into both of his and kissed it softly. He desired to kiss her lips, and the scenario was totally appropriate for a kiss, but he was going to go slow with her if that was what she'd want. He may hold the cards, but he let her do what she wanted. "Because...because I care for you. And that's the truth," he confessed, but didn't know how far he'd go and tell her.
She shook her head slowly at him. "Why?"
"Why what?"
"Why would you go through all this trouble for me?"
Castle sighed and pushed her bangs behind her ear. "I would go through so much more for you. I told you, Kate, you're an extraordinary person. I would jump off a building for you."
"But why?"
"I don't know how to explain it. You'll get it soon enough. You're smart," he said softly.
"You really are something, Castle, you know that?" Kate gave him a small smile.
She couldn't stand the tension that was between them and she backed away from him, but he kept a grip on her waist. She then caught his quick glance at her lips and she felt flushed, and looked away from him. But he tipped up her chin and kissed her forehead.
Finally, she was allowed to take a step back, but her eyes never left his and his never left hers. "Thank you for...dinner. Late night dinner, that is. Anyway, I had fun, and...I wouldn't mind if you surprise me like this again." Her eyes were now grinning at him, giving him the playful smile she always did when she thought he was being sweet. She quickly walked (limped?) to the dining room, grabbed the rose, and came back, seeing that Castle looked pleased that she was going to keep it.
"I'm glad you told me, Kate. I had a good time too. We could non-date all the time after summer if you want," Castle said, watching her grab her bathrobe and walk towards the stairs. "Good night, Beckett."
She turned just to give him a smile and whispered, "'Night."
When she was out of sight, Castle had to take a deep breath and grin. If he was making her fall in love with him, he was happy. That was what he was aiming for. He always had some sort of a crush on her, if anyone could call it a crush. He always liked her, and even though a few times he wanted more than just partners in crime, she would never take him seriously like that. So he had to act in the charming way in which women were attracted to him. Maybe that would get her to fall for him and see how much he really does care for her.
Now Kate definitely couldn't fall asleep. It was almost two in the morning, but it felt like hours to her. He made me dinner. He flirted with me and I flirted back. He danced with me. He had his arms around my waist and he pulled me closer to him. He kissed my forehead. Those moments kept replaying in her head. So was the song he played for her. She was going to get hurt by him. She knew he would bed her and then hang her out to dry and move on. He would get tired of hanging around with her. Then why has he been hanging around for two years with you, Katie? He could've left anytime he wanted, but he didn't. Of course, her mother's voice in her head didn't help one bit. If Castle liked her, appreciated her, and thought she was extraordinary, she'd have to be proven it. Before she would fall hard for him.
