Yo ho!
By: Captain Kisa


Disclaimer
:
I don't own anything you recognize. I don't even own the laptop I'm writing this on.

Yay, another chapter. Have I told you guys how much fun I am having writing this? Gah, I love it.

Pst! Guess what! I, like, have a joygasm every time I see that I get a review! Give me joygasms, plzkthx!

'zomg ur fic suxxorzz' is not an acceptable review and will be laughed at/ignored.

Puppy dog eyes don't work on me. Sorry.


"Jack," I whispered as he, Will, and I walked through Tortuga. "Jack!" To gain the pirate's attention, I even tugged on his jacket slightly. It was no use, though; he was giving Will a tour of the town, pointing out every inn or bar and telling him how many women he had done in each one, complete with a brief description of what they did. I could tell Will wasn't really enjoying it. It grossed me out.

"Jaaaack," I whined quietly, wriggling around slightly and pulling on Jack's sleeve.

"What?" he asked, annoyed that I had interrupted his description of a barmaid he met (and slept with) once.

"I er…" Giving Will a distrusting glance, I stood on tiptoe and cupped my hand around my mouth. "I have to pee!" Jack snorted with laughter. "It's not funny!" I resumed standing normally.

"I suggest you find a bush or something than, love." Jack snickered. Will stood, being politely quiet, but I could tell he wanted to know what was going on.

"Fine," I growled. "But Will has to come with me. I don't want to get… kidnapped or anything."

"Don't have to worry about that," Jack teased. "You're not pretty enough for any of the men here to want you." My jaw dropped in horror. Closing my mouth, I glared at Jack and grabbed Will's wrist. After demanding that Jack stay where he was, I set off, towing Will behind me.

"What was that about?" Will asked.

"I have to… take care of bodily needs." Will gave me a confused look before realization hit him.

"Oh," he muttered softly.

As soon as we were a safe distance out of the city, I let go of Will and stood, wondering how on earth I was expected to go to the restroom.

"Um, I'm gonna go over there and take care of my business." I pointed to a random tree and hurried off behind it. Peeking around the side, I noticed Will looking at the tree. His gaze shifted to me as soon as I appeared of behind it. "What are you doing? Don't look! Turn around!" I couldn't see Will's face properly, but I believed that I made him turn a nice shade of red. I waited until I was sure he was turned all the way around before continuing.

When I had finished, I appeared behind Will and tapped him on the shoulder.

"Come on, perv-boy," I teased, grinning. The two of us started back towards Tortuga, with Will apologizing over and over again.

It took us a while to find Jack, as he had seen something shiny and taken off. Or that's what I told Will. The funny thing was that Will didn't doubt it.

As the two of us made our way into the more crowded parts of Tortuga, I was beginning to feel rather uncomfortable.

"What's wrong?" Will asked, noting my discomfort.

"I have haptephobia," I explained, shying away from a group of men passing us. "It means I'm afraid of being touched. I don't mind if I give the person permission to touch me, like a hug or handshake or whatever, but I can't stand strangers bumping into me." Will's expression was a cross between amused and something like 'wtf?'. I grinned sheepishly.

"Weird, I know. I have plenty of other odd fears. Like apotemnophobia – fear of amputees." Will laughed slightly. "It's not funny!" I said, scowling.

"I apologize. It's just that, why are you afraid of the weirdest things?"

"You think I'm weird? Ooh, you should watch Monk. I'm so glad I don't have OCD."

Will probably didn't know what OCD was, but that didn't matter. We needed to find Jack so that we could go on with the movie. I was not going to be responsible for a rip in the fabric of time, or whatever would've happened if we didn't continue with the storyline.

"Hey! Dad!" I called loudly, looking around for sign of Jack. "Come on! This is the worst game of hide and seek ever!" I huffed and crossed my arms, stopping in the middle of the road. "Jack Sparrow, I swear-"

"You know Jack Sparrow?" Will and I turned around to see a blond-haired woman wearing too much makeup standing in front of us. I nodded slowly. Giselle looked me up and down with look of disapproval on her face.

"So he's into the young ones now, is he?" she sneered. I looked at Will for a second and than grabbed his hand with my own.

"No. Actually, he's my father. My husband," I nudged Will to tell him to play along. "and I were just looking for him. Probably off somewhere with mother, sharing a nice dinner of some sort. They just love each other so much." I shrugged and turned around, still holding Will's hand. "Pretend like you love me," I whispered just loud enough so that he could hear. With that, the two of us set off, leaving Giselle standing there, looking stupid.

I waited until we had turned a corner until I let go of Will's hand.

"Sorry about that," I muttered, embarrassed. Will looked quite sheepish himself. "I didn't know what came over me… I promise it won't happen again."

"Ah! Young William and Victoria!" The two of us looked up, startled, as Jack sauntered towards us, a sopping wet Mr. Gibbs following closely behind. "We were just on our way to get a drink. Care to join us?" I shrugged.

"Sure," I replied.

----------

I really hate taverns in Tortuga. There were way too many crowds for my taste. It was impossible to stand anywhere without someone bumping into you, so I pressed myself against the wall as much as I could. I was not having fun.

The bar seemed to be the least crowded spot in the entire room, so I began to inch slowly along the wall towards and empty barstool. I wasn't that far away for it to begin with, so it didn't take too long to travel across the few feet of wall. When I had finally made it to the stool, I practically had to jump on it to stop it from being whipped away from me, probably to be used to hit someone over the head with.

Unfortunately, the one who was trying to take the stool from me wasn't going to give up just because I was sitting on it. Sure, there where other stools, but that where all occupied by big, burly men, and since I was a small scrawny girl, they'd want my stool. The chair was yanked out from under me, sending me crashing to the ground.

"Whoever stole my stool, I will fuck their damn shit up!" I snarled, jumping to my feet and whipping my sword out of it's sheathe. Now, I don't cuss normally, but my butt hurt really badly. Not to mention that I hit my head on the counter on my way down.

"I believe this stool belongs to you, miss." A brown-haired boy who looked about to be in his teens placed my recently stolen stool down in front of me. I noticed an unconscious body a few feet behind him.

"Oh, thanks," I murmured, sheathing my sword and sliding back onto the chair. The man on the stool next to mine fell into an alcohol-induced coma and slid off his stool. The man who had returned my chair hopped onto it without skipping a beat.

"So how long are you staying in Tortuga?" he asked, leaning on the bar. I smiled slightly, amused at him.

"Until tomorrow. I'm going on a hunt for a ghost island and a ship crewed by cursed pirates with my dad and a few friends."

"Really?" He seemed sincerely interested.

"Yes… look, I feel odd talking to you without knowing your name."

"Nathaniel Devereaux."

"Victoria. Can I call you Nat?"

"Nat? I suppose… but only if I get to call you Vicky."

"Sure! … Can I give you a hug?"

"What-" Nathaniel was cut off by me wrapping my arms around him. If you haven't noticed already, I pretty much love hugs. But only when I hug people, not random people coming up and hugging me.

"Sure, I guess I don't mind," Nathaniel commented sarcastically.

"I would've hugged you anyway." I looked back towards the corner that Jack, Will, and Mr. Gibbs were occupying, and noticed a large fat woman rubbing up against Will.

"That your boyfriend?" Nathaniel asked.

"What?" I turned to Nathaniel, wondering what he was talking about. Apparently, he had followed my gaze when I had turned toward Will. "Oh, no. He's just a friend. Dad seems to think he a eunuch. It'd be funny if he really was." Nathaniel laughed.

"So… you're leaving tomorrow…"

"Yeah. We're in Tortuga looking for a crew as crazy as my dad." I shrugged and laid my head down on the counter. As soon as my head went down, a bottle smashed into the wall right where my head had previously been.

"… Can I come?"

"Eh? You want to come?" I gave Nathaniel a look as though I thought him mental. "No! We're going after the Black Pearl! You can't come, you'll get killed!"

"What, and like you could hold your own against a crew of cursed men? No offence, but you're… kinda small."

"I'm protected by the gods!" I protested.

"Gods of what?"

"Er… Geico, Triple A, and State Farm! I'm insured by them. I can't die!"

"Well, you can protect me than. I'll guard you for as long as I can, and you can interfere when I'm about to get killed." I gave Nathaniel a long, hard stare.

"No." I stated in a final sort of tone.

"I'm bigger than you; you can't stop me." Nathaniel seemed amused at the fact that I was determined to not let him join Jack's crew.

"… Fine. But don't expect me to save your butt." I snapped. Despite my harsh tone, I smiled slightly. Maybe having him on board wouldn't be so bad.


LONGEST CHAPTER YET. xD

I hope you don't mind that I brought in another character… Show some love for Nathaniel. TIME TO START CHAPTER 8. Oh, and I hope you guys don't mind me updating so quickly. Heh.

crockergirl – 'Fo sheazy? Wow, I'm honored that you think my story is the best! I pretty much love you!

ohbugger7 – OMG, is the duck okay? I feel sorry for it… Er, is this a soon enough update?

lenlen46 – Yay, I wrote more. Thanks for reviewing!