Simon
"Do I look okay?"
"You look stunning, Snow. Like always."
"Your opinion doesn't count," I say groaning. "I just don't want that your parents think I'm –"
"You look fine, believe me." Baz smiles at me and straightens my tie. (It makes me feel like I'm 10.) He wears the green suit under his coat which he already wore last year. It's still my favourite – he just looks perfect in it. I'm wearing a new blue suit I bought a few weeks ago. Together with Baz. And Penny.
We stand in front of the house of Baz's family. It's even more frightening than the first one, which they had to leave because of the Humdrum – because of me. The snowfall gets stronger with every minute and the wind howls through the forest. I'm pretty sure there will be a heavy storm tonight.
"Stay calm, Simon," Baz says softly. "Everything's going to be alright – they won't poison you or poke you with a stick."
"But they want to get rid of me – they want me out of your life!" I wipe my already sweaty hands on my trousers.
"Doesn't matter," he replies and turns to the door. "Ready to ring?"
"No," I say honestly. "Why do we even have to do this? We just could drive back home or go with Penny to her family – they at least like me!"
"This only would make things worse," Baz says. "If we don't appear at this dinner tonight they will accuse you to keep me away from my own family – you don't want that burden too, right?"
"No, of course not but –"
Baz presses the bell.
"I'm not ready! I –," I start to complain but Baz makes me shut up with a short kiss.
"Just be yourself – then they can't help but fall in love with you."
"They already hate me," I tear on my collar because I have the feeling of not getting enough air, "because of me just being myself."
"You just shouldn't mention…" The door opens and cuts Baz off.
"Merry Christmas, Mr Pitch, Mr Snow," says the woman who opened the door in a high and gentle tone. I remember her from my first visit to the Pitches estate.
"Merry Christmas, Vera," Baz says with a very charming voice. I only manage to nod.
"Please come in," the woman says and she waves us through the door.
Even when this house is smaller than the old one it's still way too huge for only one family. The entrance hall is already almost as big as our flat. You feel like you're in a Victorian history museum and are not allowed to touch anything. (That's a challenge. Especially for me. A tail, wings and … just being me.)
"May I take your coats?" Vera asks and already reaches for my grey duffle coat. I hurry to get out of it, without crumbling my suit.
"Thank you," Baz says with a lovely smile. He's really good at all this nice guest stuff. I can't even smile because my jaw is so strained. It's frustrating.
She takes our coats and vanishes behind a door. Baz and I are left alone. I exhale.
"Try to calm down," Baz whispers right a second before his parents enter the room. "Your tail already hit my legs."
I really try but I can't really control it. Fortunately, it's invisible. My wings are cast very small, so you can't spot them under my suit. Penny and Baz are constantly experimenting with new spells to tame them.
"Basilton," his father says and steps closer to us. He pats Baz's shoulder in a weird distant way and gives him a quick smile.
"Merry Christmas, Father," Baz replies and nods. He stands really straight; his hands are folded on his back and his whole attitude seems really confident. I try to copy him because I feel anything but confident. So, I nock up my chin, square my shoulders, place my feet apart and fold my hands. I still don't feel better.
Baz's Father reaches his hand out to me and I grab it and shake it two times. I hope my grip isn't too wobbly.
"Welcome to our modest home, Mr Snow," he says and scans me from top to bottom. "How nice of you to join our Christmas dinner this year. Basil never brought someone with him before."
"I'm very grateful for your invitation, …Sir," I mumble and swallow. On the way here, I thought about a few sentences I should say when I meet Baz's parents but I don't remember any, so I decide this has to be enough for the time being.
Mrs Grimm – his stepmother – hugs Baz and gives him a brief kiss on his forehead. I try not to stare at her, but it's strange to see them both interacting that intimately. I only saw Baz a few times with his family together – but I never considered that he could be close to them. Well, it's still a bit stiff.
"Nice to see you again, Mr Snow," she greets me afterwards with a polite smile.
"You can call him Simon," Baz says and winks at me. I just nod.
"Well then, let's go into the dining room, Simon," she invites me and points at the corridor.
With a distance of a few metres, Baz and I follow them. I flinch as Baz takes my hand.
"It's just me, Snow," he mutters and kisses my fingers. "You don't have to jump."
"I just thought we wouldn't do this in here," I answer silently.
"Do what?"
"Holding hands in front of your parents," I whisper. "Stuff like this."
"We aren't in front of them right now, and besides, why shouldn't we? They know about us so we don't have to hide." He squeezes my palm.
They lead us into an old-fashioned (like everything here) room with a very formally laid table. There are plenty of huge plates of good looking food. And it smells really delicious. If it's as good as the dinner I ate here last year at Christmas Eve, I could polish off everything – but I'm so tense that even the thought of eating makes me sick. Too bad for the good meal.
"Please take a seat," Mrs Grimm says. "I go and look for the kids." She leaves the room so only Baz's father, Baz and I are left. Mr Grimm sits down at the other end of the table. He's wearing a grey suit and his long white hair is slid back like Baz's. His face is unreadable but at the same time, you can clearly tell that he isn't delighted about my visiting. (Or even about me as a whole person.) I only met him two…maybe three times after last Christmas and he never really talked to me. I always just stood there next to Baz and tried to be invisible. So, this is the first time I'm really facing him. But I still don't feel prepared for it…
I don't know where to take place but Baz reaches for my arm and pulls me to the chair right next him. I'm really thankful for the opportunity to sit because my legs are so shaky. I slide back and forth because I can't decide how to sit properly. Baz's watching me and lays his hand on my knee to make me stop. It only makes me more nervous. I literally can feel the eyes of his father burning into my chest.
"And Basil, how was your Christmas Eve?" his dad asks. "After all, it was the first time you didn't celebrate at home."
Something in his voice makes even this small phrase sounding like an accusation.
"It was very nice, Father," Baz responds relaxed. "I celebrated at Simon's, together with his roommate Penelope Bunce."
"Yeah, I remember her," he replies in a way that makes you wish he wouldn't remember you. "I'm glad you had a nice celebration."
"Me, too. How was your evening?" Baz asks – surely just being polite.
"Quiet," his dad answers and folds his hands. "We ate dinner and the children went to bed soon like every year."
I take a deep breath and ask one of my prepared questions because I want to seem interested – so they might at least like me a bit. "Mr Grimm, what do you do for a living?" I ask and try a polite smile.
Instead of answering me, he looks at Baz and says: "Interesting that you two don't talk about the important stuff."
Baz grimaces but he doesn't reply. My hands get sweaty again. I don't know what I did wrong – but decide to be quiet for starters.
Right at this moment, Mrs Grimm comes back with Baz's siblings: Mordelia, the twins and the little baby (which starts to become a toddler) in the arms of his mother.
"Hello Basil," Mordelia says and pulls on the chair across from me. She sits down and stares at my face. "Why are you here again?" she asks frowning.
"Mordelia, please be polite to our guest," Mrs Grimm responds and puts the baby in a highchair with gargoyles on it, right next to me. I don't know how, but it makes me feel uncomfortable.
"Yes, Mum." The girl takes her napkin and lays it on her lap.
"I told you last week that I'll bring Simon to our Family Christmas dinner," Baz says to his sister. "But probably you didn't listen very well. Like always."
Mordelia gives him a wrathful look. "This means Simon is part of our family now?" she asks with raised eyebrows. I stare at my plate.
"Yes, little sister. Kind of he is," Baz says with a voice that doesn't allow any protest. I hear his father clearing his throat. I swallow.
"Let us start with the dinner," Mrs Grimm requests and takes her place at the other end of the table, facing her husband. The two little girls sit on the opposite side of me. So, now all three kids are staring at me and the baby punches his spoon against my shoulder. It makes me feel like I'm the first course. I want to be out of here. Now.
