Hello there dearies
as always a huge thank you (or danke as the Germans say –if ur German and I'm wrong just ignore me-) to everyone who reviewed/alerted/faved (shall we just call you respondents from now on? I think so) you are all fine young (or old) men and women (or both if you so chose, I would love you anyway)


"Er, ok... So...that's one large pizza with everything expect for one, er, fifth was it? One fifth with no meat and one fifth with...mustard?"

The poor waitress was looking very confused; must be her first day. Poor, poor girl.

"That is correct, dear, carry on."

"Right, and two sodas and three milkshakes; two strawberry and one chocolate and an ice-cream cake with a side of...more mustard...?"

You wouldn't think we'd be able to eat all that. You would be mistaken.

"Yep."

"Riiight... And would you like anything else with that?"

"Nup, we're good. And hey, don't worry about it. Just tell them the Titans are here, they'll know what to do."

"Um, ok..." and with a drop of her clipboard she scurried back inside, shooting us nervous glances all the way.

We were sitting at our favourite table at the old faithful pizza place, swapping stories of our latest...um, adventures? ...Sure let's call them that. I was glad we hadn't decided to order in again; I was tired of finding empty pizza boxes in strange places (places like my underwear drawer! I know I certainly didn't put it there...)

"-And then the McDonalds sign smashed into the KFC sign and the whole thing exploded like you wouldn't believe! There was fire falling from the freakin' sky!"

...That might make an interesting commercial actually.

"Yeah, well, I was-"

"Oh yeah, we found this near the house," I cut across Beast Boy, not really interested in hearing him re-enact his daring rescue attempt for the fourth time that hour. I pulled out the ring (from my secret pocket) and slid it across the table to Robin. "Isn't it like the one that was stolen?"

He held the ugly little ring up to his eye (or mask, whatever) and pulled a crumpled piece of paper out of the depths of his cape. It was the picture the jewellery store guy gave us!

"Dude!" Beast Boy stared at Robin incredulously, "you kept that?"

"Sure, I keep everything from our missions."

"What do you do with it all? Scrapbook it?"

Robin's words said 'no' but his eyes said 'yes'.

"But why do you have it on your person?"

"I-never you mind." ...Ok... "You're right Raven, it is the same ring!"

At Robin's words, Cyborg burst out laughing, thumping the table with his fist (a rather dangerous practice for someone with such a large hand). He stopped long enough to look at Beast Boy and I to say "You found it! You actually found it!"

"Oh, congratulations, friends! Now that mean fat man shall have to consume his words! Not that he really had any right to call us ninnies in the first place!" Starfire clapped, giggling.

That's right; no one calls the Teen Titans lukewarm names and gets away with it.

"Yeah! The douche shall pay!" Beast boy cheered, slinging an arm around Cyborg's and my shoulders, "But it's pretty weird don't you think, I mean, how we found the thing from our last mission at our next one?"

I think the following responses say something about our minds:

Name: Raven

Age: 17 years

Response: "Yeah I guess." (Acknowledges that Moron 1 has made a fair point and thus agrees)

Verdict: A reasonable girl.

Name: Cyborg

Age: 19 years

Response: "A bit, yeah..." (Similar to above, though the constant glances back at the kitchen suggest the he is more concerned with his next meal than this quirky little plot twist)

Verdict: A reasonable guy who is hungry.

Name: Starfire

Age: 18 years

Response: (non-verbal) A vague nod while she watches the butterfly that just landed on the table. (Assumes it is merely a coincidence and would rather look at the pretty thing before her)

Verdict: A sweet girl who is not entirely switched on right now.

Name: Robin

Age: 17 years

Response: "Hmm...it is a bit, suspicious... You don't think it was intentional? I bet someone's instigating this! We'd better be on our guard!" (Immediately jumps the worst, most extreme conclusion)

Verdict: A crazy little boy who is secretly in desperate need for another villain who is up to Slade's standard.

We all gave Robin the 'Holy Silky! He's gone loco again!' look. You know the look; it involves a lot of eyeball bulging and vigorous eyebrow movement.

"Uh..."

"Robin, I..."

"Dude, no."

"Richard," Starfire said gently, placing a hand on his arm, "I do not believe this is anything to worry about. Perhaps it is merely a coincidence, and you did not get much sleep last night, what with all the papers and the files. You most likely simply just have the bad guys, what is the expression? On the brain?"

"Ok, ok, guys," He held his hand up in defeat, chuckling. "I was just saying, calm down."

We collectively let out the breaths we had been holding.

"Oh good." Starfire said, smiling and went back to her butterfly. I quickly glanced at Cyborg and Beast Boy to see if they had been thinking along the same lines that I had been.

Oh Lord, for a moment I thought that Robin was going through another Slade-phase. And let me tell you now, that was not fun.

Whatsoever.

It hurt us to see Robin paranoid and crazy. Especially Starfire, who was now watching her butterfly with some kind of sadness in her eyes. You know, for an alien, green guy, boy in tights, half metal bloke and...whatever the hell I am, we were pretty much a family and we'd all sworn a sort of non-verbal oath to kick the asses of anything that tried to hurt any of us.

I was jerked from my little reverie by the waitress's wobbly return. The poor girl had evidently, probably in an attempt to impress her new boss, tried to balance our whole order on her various limbs. I admired her high work ethic so I thought it best not to mention that her hair was dangling in the ice-cream cake.

We'd just have to scrape that bit off before Beast Boy ate it...

To our great amazement she made it to our table without spilling a single drop of mustard and placed our order down in front of us with a look of triumph on her face.

"One large Titans pizza, two sodas, two strawberry milkshakes, one chocolate milkshake and an ice-cream cake with a side of mustard" she said proudly, no so much confirming our order as stating all the things her tiny little arms (and head) had carried.

"...Well done." Beast Boy said his eyes shifting from the mountain of food to her (not so) flimsy arms and back again.

To my utter disgust, she turned scarlet and giggled.

Oh fantastic.

There are many breedss of fangirl out there; Orlando Bloom ones, Ouran High School Host Club ones, even Control Freak ones (no, seriously they exist, I've seen them), but by far the most irritating form are the Beast Boy ones. People who worship someone so...Garfield, must have been born with more than few screws loose in my professional opinion. Not to mention how their very presence inflated his head size tenfold.

Yup, there he goes now, doing what he believes to be his 'sexy grin'.

Cyborg and I have come to the mutual agreement that it looks more like he was whacked in the back of the head with a mallet.

And then kicked.

Repeatedly.

"So, what's your name, cutie-pie?"

Oh, for the love of God... Did he just...?

*giggle* "Lucy" *giggle giggle*

It's like having knives shoved in your ears...

"That's a nice name; would you like an autograph, Lucy?"

You can't be serious...he's not really that crap is he?

*giggle giggle blush giggle* "Oooh yes please!"

*scribble scribble on a napkin* "

Yes, yes he is...

Bloody hell.

'Lucy' squeaked an excited thank you and scampered back inside, stumbling slightly.

I can't believe I nearly admired her hidden arm strength.

When she was gone Robin and Cyborg started snickering and I fixed Beast Boy with a particularly disbelieving look.

"What?" He asked, goofy grin still intact.

"You truly are an obnoxious little boy aren't you Garfield?" I scoffed, rolling my eyes.

The smile slid from his face for all of a second before it was replaced with a shrewd smirk.

"Sure you aren't just jealous, Raven?"

Now, I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the biggest laugher in the world but that really got me. Cyborg and I shared a glance of pure incredulity before bursting into fits of uncontrollable laughter. I don't normally burst into anything but come on, how could you not laugh at that?

"Sorry," I said, when I had managed to calm myself down to quiet giggling, "but I think you must have jealous confused with nauseous."

"Raven..." You know how people say that thing about a blind man seeing light for the first time? Well that's now Beast Boy was looking at me.

"...What?"

"You just laughed..."

"Yes..."

"Really crazily..."

"Gee, thanks."

"At something I said!"

I guess some people are just too conceited to be insulted.

"At you. Cause you're an idiot..."

He seemed to be weighing his options and finally decided, "Still counts."

I couldn't help but let out a snort at his logic which earned me another huge smile.

"Yes?"

"King of the Idiots."

"I love you too Rae Rae."


It is the belief of many people in this fine city that we spend each and every one of our every waking minute focussing on their ultimate safety and ridding the world of evil.

Oh how I wished that were true.

If it was, I feel the odds of me having a mustard-high redhead painting my toenails would be much lower. As things were I was surrounded by Starfire's many stuffed animals (most presents from Robin; some handmade by Beast Boy...he's not a bad sewer actually) reading out the 'Which Celeb Hottie Would YOU Date?' quiz as she applied my second coat of 'turquoise sparkle'.

"Ok last question; where is your dream location for a date?"

"Ooh! The fifth moon of Trollax IV! The flangoons are lovely this time of year!"

"Er...the options are the beach, the movies or a fancy restaurant..."

"Oh...the restaurant please."

"Congratulations, Starfire the 'celeb hottie you would date' is...Robert Pattinson."

"Oh dear..."

"Hehe... you got Spunk Ransome."

"You shall never speak of this again or I shall tell Beast Boy you got the Justin Beiber."

"You wouldn't..."

"I might, it depends on how much you irk me."

Scary girl.

My toes had just dried when we heard a knock on the door. Starfire bounded up to open it, sending the evil magazine of lies flying. I was just wondering if I should have put up a stronger fight against her efforts to put my hair into ringlets when the door opened to reveal a man with very silky hair and a very shiny unitard.

The return of AquaGarth!

Followed by Beast Boy.

And I was wearing lip shimmer. Shimmer, I tell you!

"Hey Raven, Starfire." Aqualad smiled at me, not even looking at Star which I thought was a bit rude considering she was standing right in front of him.

"Oh...hello."

Yes, that did wonders for the situation Rae Rae, well done.

Shuddup, you.

"Greetings friend! What brings you hear so unexpectedly?"

Yeah! That's what I wanna know! Why couldn't you have come when I didn't look like a bratz doll?

"Oh, I was in town and Bumble Bee wanted me to drop off our annual report for Robin so I thought I'd just drop in and give you guys our Christmas presents early." And he did this twinkly smile at me as I tried to wipe off the shimmer as discreetly as possible.

"Oh, how wonderful!" Starfire beamed but again he just looked right past her.

I thought that if I gave him a little nod he'd stop staring at me so I did but he just kept going.

I knew I looked like an idiot but come on! There was no need to be cruel!

"Right well, he just wanted to, uh, check in on you two but, you're busy and I'm sure you're tired from your trip Aquadude, so let me show you to your room...NOW!"

Saved by the Beast Boy.

Just as I thought he was never going stop smiling at me and I was going to be locked in his awkward trance forever, Garfield grabbed him by the arm and flung him, a little harder than necessary out into the hall. Before he shut the door behind him he turned back to me and mouthed 'nice hair' twirling his own around his finger.

I recovered from the awkward trace just in time to fling Starfire's stuffed panda at his retreating face.

I heard his laugh out in the corridor, too pissed to care that it sounded a little forced.

What douchbags!

Starfire picked her panda up off the floor, stroking its wounds and gave me a reproachful look before beaming rather scarily and bounding back to the bed.

"Did you see that?"

"I know! It's not my fault I look like a drag queen! He didn't have to stare at me like that, and Beast Boy is just-"

"Raven...he was not staring at you because you look like a transvestite."

It's pretty sad that I took that as a compliment, isn't it?

Quite.

"Wasn't he...?"

"He was staring at you because you are beautiful."

...

...

...

I know, right?

And she said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world too.

"Er...Star have you been dipping skittles in your mustard again, cause you know that's really not good for you..."

Starfire was staring at me in total shock, "Do you truly not know?"

"Know what?"

"X'Hal Raven I knew you were modest but I had no idea you were so...utterly oblivious."

"Starfire, what are you talking about?"

"Aqualad has the feelings for you."

...

...

...

...

...

...

Meh?

What the hell was she- oh...

"Oh, I get it! You're joking...! Yes, yes very funny, well done Star, you almost got me, I-"

"Raven, I do not jest."

"Sure sure, Starfire."

"Truly, everybody knows...it is really quite obvious."

And she looked like she honestly meant it.

Which could only mean one thing.

Someone had drugged my poor innocent little Starfire!

"Star...when we were out, were you watching your drink at all times?"

"Raven, I am not on the drugs! Why is this so hard for to believe?"

Because it was impossible.

Absolutely impossible.

When pigs fly impossible.

When Hermione ends up with Snape impossible!

"Uh...cause I'm me. Have you even met me? I'm Raven, you know creepy, grey skin, croaky voice, cripplingly antisocial, relatives in interdimensional hell! Any of this ringing a bell?"

"Do not be silly, you're quite lovely."

Lovely?

I am a lot of things but lovely?

"Star..."

"Many boys like you actually," She said shuffling to sit next to me amongst the plushies, "For a while a few years ago I was rather convinced that Robin did, I was quite sad, you may remember I did not speak to you for a week."

...

Robin?

ROBIN?

As in RICHARD GRAYSON?

As in the tight-wearing bastard?

As in the boy who has been like a BROTHER to me? (twin even, when we're both being particularly angsty)

"And you're calling me oblivious?" I gaped, resisting the urge to smack her pretty little head to make sure everything was working properly, "Why the hell would Robin like me? He's been practically in love with you ever since you stopped trying to kill us! I thought you were angry at me cause I accidentally stepped on Silky!"

"You trod on my baby?"

"Focus woman!"

"Ah, where was I?"

"Being wrong!"

She smiled at the exasperated look on my face and gave my head a little pat, "You should be pleased Raven, Aqualad is rather good-looking although I am not sure he is really your type."

How does she know my type?

I don't even know my type!

The crazy girl in question glanced at the clock on her bedside table, "Oh I must be going," she said, "Richard and I are going to see the Kick Ass movie"

Oh sure, mess up my brain, confuse the hell out of me then leave to got snog your boyfriend in the back row of the cinema!

How much snogging do really think they're going to get in watching Kick Ass?

That is totally irrelevant.

She got up, dropped Silky in my lap (for company I guess), patted my head again and made for the door. She was just about to leave when she turned back and gave me the kind of smile you give a little kid who just can't tie their shoelace.

"Why else do you think Beast Boy gets so angry with him? They used to be very good friends you know"

And she just left.

...

Beast Boy? What the bloody hell does THAT mean?

Beats me...


A/N: Sorry to all the Rpatz and Bieber fans out there. I do admire your dedication and your sheer crazyness.

-btw I count myself among the Ouran High School Host Club fangirls (and sadly the Orlando Blooms ones as well... as I have explained to my friends, it wasn't a conscious decision, I think I was just born this way...)