Wow this is way shorter then I thought. Ugh I keep doing this.

But I'm pretty sure I like this chapter better. (The if only chapters are the best XD)

Enjoy!


(Not Cole's POV)

If only he hadn't woken up to an unfamiliar face

If only he hadn't noticed so quickly that something was wrong, something was missing

If only he wasn't so young, too young to handle the weight of knowing his life was forever changed

If only he didn't fight me when I tried to keep him in bed

If only he wasn't so strong and young and reckless

If only I wasn't forced to call security and cause him to be more terrified than he already was (He wasn't angry or hostile or violent, only scared and alone and panicked)

If only he didn't cry his friend's name as if he would die without him

If only he didn't wail that he needed his brother, he needed Cole until his voice was hoarse

If only he didn't begin to hyperventilate until I thought he would faint from the pressure

If only I wasn't terrified that he'd reopen both wounds

If only whoever this Cole was wasn't taking so long to get here

If only I had experienced something like this before, so I could've been prepared for the emotional scarring it would leave

(I couldn't imagine how he was feeling, so scared and helpless, hardly seventeen years old with so much life left to live, and now all alone in a hospital room without anyone he loved (or even knew) around him when he remembered what had happened)

If only I didn't start sobbing myself, helpless to help him because of my own tears

If only I could've taken away his pain, physical...or emotional

(After all I was a nurse, and soothing other people's pain was what I longed to do.)

If only this poor kid, Kai, didn't have to suffer such pain at such a young age.

If only...there wasn't this much pain in the world.

Maybe then I wouldn't feel so helpless.