She looked into his eyes and watched the challenge within them, making her feel just slightly uncomfortable as the intensity cut through her. Suddenly, he reached out and grabbed the mouse, pulling the monitor in his direction so that he could see it, she reached for the mouse but he held it out of her reach. "No." He said, reaching for the speaker, he turned the volume on and clicked the button on the file.
For several moments all there was over the speaker was a crackling silence. Then his voice, apprehensive and soft echoed over the line as he stared at her across the desk, his eyes slightly red rimmed from the tears he was trying to hold back. He needed her to hear the messages.
'Hey Bones…' His voice was so very soft, she could hardly hear it, she swallowed hard as the message continued, those dark brown eyes burning into hers. 'I know you're not going to get this until you get home… until we're both home… so in your giant logical brain, it probably seems like this is a waste of time for me, or a waste of a phone call?' They could literally hear the hard swallow on the line. 'I don't think it's a waste though… They said we could call our loved ones, so I called Parker… and had some extra time left, and for some reason the only person that I could think to call was you. What… what I'm trying to say, Bones… Temperance.' Booth could see the tears in her eyes as they trailed down her cheeks, and he so wanted to stop the recording and pull her into his arms, but he knew that she needed to hear this. She needed to feel what he felt, to face the fears that were causing her to push him away. 'I… what… I love you, Temperance.' His voice cracked over the line. 'I love you, and I know it's not brain chemistry, it's not a brain tumor, it's not… euphoria… it's the truth. It's the truth, and I know you well enough, to know that it's all you ever want out of everyone, the truth. I love you.'
"Booth…" She whimpered, tears rolling down her cheeks as she watched his eyes soften just slightly. The recording continued, and he just stared into her blue eyes as if he was lost in a maze and had no desire to find his way out.
'I hope you don't mind if I call your machine now and again… sometimes to talk, sometimes just to hear your voice on the message… I miss you, Bones. It's only been a damn week, and I miss you so damn much.' The man on the tape took a deep breath, trying to control the emotions that were bubbling over. 'I'll call back soon… I hope you're being safe.' He whispered, and the recording stopped.
Brennan's eyes were directly on his, and she wasn't about to be the first to look away. He held her gaze second for second, even as someone knocked on the door. "That's probably Cam, checking on Cooke's condition." Brennan sniffed.
"She can wait." He replied evenly. "Bones…"
"This is exactly why I didn't want to listen to those messages." She said, holding his gaze, she shook her head. "This…" She said, rubbing her cheek, the tear away. "This is exactly why…"
"Because then you'd have to actually have some kind of human emotion?" He asked, the sarcasm dripping from each syllable, he watched another tear trail down her cheek. He wanted to feel sympathy, he wanted to feel bad for making her upset, but he needed her to understand exactly what he was feeling.
"No." She whimpered. "No… Booth," she shook her head. "I just… you left those messages when you were emotional, when you were alone. Those messages were… were a product of your loneliness, and…"
"No." He said, pointing at the screen. "That is not a product of my loneliness, Bones. That is a product of spending nearly every single day with you for the five years of our partnership! That is a product of my soul, Bones… it is not because I didn't know what I had until I didn't have it any longer!" He exclaimed sternly. "It's because I knew what I had, and I didn't want to let it go!"
"Then why did you leave it in a message?"
"I didn't leave it in a message, Bones… I left it in every single one of those messages that you didn't listen to! If you had the nerve to open just one of those messages, you would have heard it… every single one of them!" He exclaimed.
"Booth!"
"No." He shook his head. "No, Bones… It's clear that you still don't understand." He said, taking a step backwards.
"Booth, please…"
"We're done here, okay? I thought I could do this, but apparently I can't." He shook his head. "You have your life, I have mine, we're apparently going in opposite directions, and…"
"If you left those messages, Booth… saying… saying that you love me… why did you meet someone out there? Where does Sarah come into all of this?" She whispered.
"That's what I want to know, Bones… all of the things that you told me the other day… this declaration of love when we were in the bone storage room. Where does Cooke come into all of this?" He asked, approaching her quickly, he stopped about three feet from her, crossing his arms over his chest, his eyes were nearly accusing as hers were hurt.
"Booth, it's complicated."
"It's complicated… It's complicated… I get it." He nodded. "I get it." He said waving his hand in irritation, he turned for the door and instantly felt her hand on his shoulder.
"No, you don't get it." She said, feeling him stop beneath her touch. "I'm not in love with Matthew Cooke, Booth." She said. She waited, and after a moment, he turned to face her.
"Then what is all of this about? Since I've been home you've had nothing to do with me, Bones. I barely see you on the weekends, we've finished two cases and you won't go have drinks with me. The last time I saw you alone was when you barged into my apartment hysterical and not making any sense. You tell me what the hell is going on. If it isn't Cooke… then what is it?"
"It is Cooke." She whispered. "But not the one you think it is."
"I don't understand."
"Spencer Cooke, Booth. I'm in love with Spencer Cooke." She shrugged.
